In which the pond would love to do a Tootle, but is kept inside the hive mind by the Major and the Caterist ...

 

Naturally the reptiles at the lizard Oz were outraged at the banning of Al Jazeera by the authoritarian Israeli government.

It was top of the page in the tree killer edition and prominent at the top of the digital page. 

Dame Slap abandoned her obsession with matters Lehrmann to fulminate about freedumb, while the Major, in his preferred far right position at the top of the reptile world ma, was extremely cross ... always at the heart of media issues, you won't find the Major vacating the field when it comes to such a noteworthy affair, a media scandal of the first water...

Marvel at the depth and breadth of the reptile coverage ...

Down below commentator after commentator lined up to rail at the decision, what with the lizard Oz being run by an autocrat, and so with an interest in what happens to hard-hitting organisations ...

Say what? The pond has turned delusional, there is no trial of the orange Jesus happening in New York and the Israeli government didn't ban Al Jazeera?

But the pond swears it read about it in Haaretz ...

What's that? There was a story in the Graudian too? Israel shuts down local Al Jazeera offices in 'dark day for the media'.

Sorry, every day is a dark day for the media when reading the lizard Oz. 

The number of stories that get ghosted, banished, banned, disappeared into the cornfield, taken off to the gravel pit and put down, seem to grow and grow.

The pond's already tenuous grasp of reality slips day by day into the bubble-wrapped hive mind ...

Other stories about sociopaths you won't be reading this day in the lizard Oz, and so the pond ...

Meanwhile the pond's brand new very bestie, extremely favourite politician talked up a storm on Face the Nation ... as reported in the Beast ... (paywall)

Kristi Noem capped off an embarrassing week with a brutal CBS Face the Nation appearance, in which host Margaret Brennan unrelentingly grilled the South Dakota governor on the controversies surrounding her forthcoming book.
At one point in the book, titled No Going Back, Noem recalled meeting North Korean dictator Kim Jong Un, claiming he “underestimated” her. However, experts have called into question whether such a meeting could have ever taken place.
“Did you meet Kim Jong Un?” Brennan directly asked the governor, who avoided answering the question and instead said she’s “met with many, many world leaders” and has “made some edits” to the book.
“I’ve met with many, many world leaders and traveled around the world,” Noem said. “I think I’ve talked extensively in this book about my time serving in Congress, my time as governor, before governor, some of the travels that I've had. I'm not going to talk about my specific meetings with world leaders. I’m just not going to do it.”
Her blatant refusal to say whether she actually met with the dictator contradicts her admission that the anecdote should not have been included in the book—a point Noem repeatedly noted during the interview. She never explained why she is pulling the story from the final version, however.
Brennan tried to offer Noem alternative explanations, including whether she might have instead met with South Korea’s leader, but Noem refused to clarify her actual reality...

Many's the time the pond has wondered about its actual reality, but Kristi went out on a surge and a high ...

...When asked about her chances as the veep choice on Sunday, Noem ignored the question and seemingly suggested to Brennan that President Joe Biden’s dog, Commander, should be shot for chomping on Secret Service agents.
Noem’s advisers had reportedly hoped that her Face the Nation interview would produce some news, ostensibly to change the emerging public narrative of a cold, obfuscating politician. However, throughout the interview, Noem only seemed to use her time to deflect from questions and attack Brennan, asking her why Brennan wasn’t raising Joe Biden’s lies—during an interview with Noem, not the president.
“If I had an interview with Joe Biden, who I’ve asked for multiple times, I will ask him about this,” Brennan said. “I’m asking you about your book.”

Sorry, sorry, what's that, the pond has filibustered yet again, while anxious students keep asking about their herpetology studies?

Please, just one more indulgence ... an infallible Pope resonating a little with that Al Jazeera matter ...

Oh if you must, now let the hunger games and the herpetology studies begin, but it's just the Caterist being a fine old luddite and raging, as only a floodwaters in quarries whisperer could, about those dang computers ...

The pond regrets that the first gobbet began with an alleged cartoonist producing an alleged cartoon. 

The contrast between the alleged cartoon and an actual cartoon by the infallible Pope could well produce toxic shock, but sadly, the pond likes to show the reptiles and their surroundings, and if it happens to be a visual cesspit, what can the pond do?

In the same spirit, the pond's latest upgrade has taken to showing the reptiles attempting to distract from the dullard commentary by the lollard luddite ...

As for the rest, the astonishing ability of the Caterist to show off his love of wanking simply can't be avoided ...

At this point, the reptiles decided to insert a favourite distraction, and having been off line for almost an entire day in recent weeks, the pond will join in the celebration of Malware ... the other dick, not so much ...

Coming next week, the Caterist will explain why a return to carrier pigeons is the only way forward ...what with the chem trails likely to mean that everyone goes off line ... (and more conspiracy theories here for the savouring).

At this point the reptiles inserted another distraction ...

... then it was a gallop to the finish line with the final quarry whisperer gobbet ... and you know you're deep in wanking turf, when the Caterist turns to the 'invisible hand' for the final blessed touch and happy ending ...

Did anyone else enjoy that quantum joke for a final flourish? Would it have been even better if he'd offered a "leap back to the future?"

What a wit the Caterist is, and how lucky the pond is that it can offer as a bonus the usual Major insights, the ones that are offered each Monday by the Major, so that the pond can begin the week in a Major Major way ...

It will be noted that, in the usual reptile way, the only hot link in that first gobbet keeps anxious readers deep inside the midden heap reading Middap ... not even the Caterist's weekly column, and especially not his Substack site are deemed worthy.

Must stay inside the hive, must keep on with the Major blathering the usual climate science denialism, denigrating renewables, mocking net-zero, must avoid links to climate change news ...

Et tu bumble bees? The pond hardly knew you ... Et tu Olympic nations? Maybe there is some justice if that fraudulent enterprise goes down ...

And don't worry about that 'Tiser story, though it is a worry that the 'Tiser turned up in the pond's logarithms, what with the pond having left Adelaide long ago ... where the air of unreality is always strong, and the 'Tiser was just showing off relevancy deprivation syndrome by reporting on the Pabai and Kabai v Commonwealth matter... (sorry, the pond does its best not to link to paywalls, and succeeded on that one).

Triple sorry, back to the Major after that shocking detour which didn't even mention Brazil ...

Say one thing for the Major, his ability to repeat himself constitutes an astonishing form of journalism, and ditto his ability to ask astonishing questions ... and next week, stay tuned for a rant about the futility of local manufacture of solar panels, because we simply must keep shipping things from China, an astonishingly sensible procedure given the reptile desire for war with China by Xmas ... 

Somewhere in the pond's mind came blissful reminders of Pig Iron Bob at his finest ...

Meanwhile, the Major was asking even more penetrating questions ...

The Grattan Institute? Well at least it's not the Menzies Research Centre, even if it is another quango mango that began life with a generous endowment from the federal and Victorian governments and it shows that the Major will turn to any port in a storm provided he can make it sound like they're singing from the same hymn sheet.

What's that? A link would have been nice, perhaps to one of the podcasts or reports, if that's your thing? It's not the pond's thing, but it's nice to know you can if you step outside the hive mind.

Sorry, remember you're not supposed to leave the hive mind.

The next link is to Jimbo, but it's to Jimbo safely tucked behind the lizard Oz paywall... but if you want to, you can find it outside the lizard Oz here ... and it even carried the same date...

The question remains, why does Jimbo support the lizard Oz paywall? Is it because he knows that nobody, including Kristi's dog, would be lining up for an RSS feed or an email notification? 

But might it not be better to hear the sounds of crickets than to hide the crickets behind the lizard Oz paywall?

Never mind, the pond's duty is done, and the Major's final gobbet is here, and with it that aforementioned link, except that it keeps you inside the hive ...

Bizarre really, the deeply entrenched nature of the hive mind. There's the Major recommending a report, but it's simply not reptile policy to allow a link to said report, though it's easy enough to do ...

It's yet another sobering reminder how if you relied on the reptiles you'd never know what barking mad authoritarian fundamentalists had done to Al Jazeera, or that a certain trial for a coup lover would soon resume business in New York, or that there are carpetbagger sightings that make it into cartoons of the immortal Rowe kind ...

It's all in the detail, as fine a set of shameless rogues as might be drawn ... and with it a reminder to the pond how mighty strange it was that the Major failed to mention the need to nuke the country to save the planet ... everyone, but sotto voce ... perhaps just wear the hat ...