The pond was astonished and alarmed.
In an idle moment, the pond did a quick check of the most important issue confronting the nation, neigh the world, possibly the known, and even the unknown, universe, and was mortified that the reptiles came up short ...
Was it something in the pond's logarithms?
Not a single lizard Oz story made the cut, though news.com.au had at least featured, with news that the despicable Germans had joined the fuss (in the old days talk of the huns would have featured, but of late Victorians are more likely to think of the HUN).
The pond was briefly reassured by doing another scan this morning, and finding that the mighty Bolter had weighed in, in his usual magisterial way, discovering it was all about race, as only the eternally race-obsessed Bolter could ...
Oh yes, the right to buy cheap trinkets frequently made in China is all about race ... but where were the reptiles in this mighty battle? Who would stand up for the lizard Oz?
What an ecstatic relief. It's Monday, and the quarry flood whispering Caterist was ready to join the fray ...
Some might think that the pond isn't taking this seriously, but truly this issue is way beyond climate change or sundry wars or whatever, this is life and death ... invasion day is under dire threat ...
What else? Well briefly at the top of the digital page there was yet another tale about the republic by the dangerously radicalised and haunted reptiles, devastated that their radical desire to abandon talking tampons had been thwarted ...
Good on ya Ellie but sad to say, the reptiles still love a Queen ... why you could even kill a tree and get a crowning edition ...
As a result of the regal fuss, and Wong being wrong again, Ellie's republican crocodile tears had slipped down the page early this day ...
Meanwhile, perched in the far right top of the digital edition, the bromancer was at last back ...
Strangely, the pond was unmoved, perhaps because the pond had already read The Conversation ...
... and the Graudian also had a story ...
Inevitably the bro used the occasion not to contemplate Taiwan and its future, but to give Albo a bash and urge them to join in the bro's impending war on China, due well before Xmas, triggered by a refusal to supply cheap trinkets and plastic flags for the waving thereof ... and so the pond only sampled the last outburst ...
Not half way through the first month of the year and the bromancer managed to make the pond feel exceptionally tired, what with that portent of things to come and talk of "it has completely fallen apart".
The bromancer already crying to the heavens and completely falling apart?
So it goes and down below the fold there were a few other voices looking at Taiwan...
There was no doubt that the pond had had the best of it with the Caterist, but surely the pond could make room for the beefy boofhead ... after all, some readers have a deep interest in the dark art, and matters economical ...
What's that you say?
The pond would have been better off reading 18 Reasons why the Stage 3 tax cuts should be redesigned ... including but not limited to the beefy boofhead's desire to line his pockets ...
On and on they went ...
Sheesh, as if the pond cares about Tamworth, long gone to the dogs and Barners ... and yet still they kept on trying to convince the pond ...
Bah humbug ...
There's only one issue that matters ... the right to buy trinkets, then toss them in the cupboard, or better still, into the bin to teach those bloody do-gooder councils a lesson ...
You bloody beaut ...
The pond realises that it's been a big, neigh an epic day in the lizard Oz culture wars, and it's a tragedy that the bromancer's return was so predictable and low key, but the pond has no doubt he'll soon be on top of things and celebrating the triumph of the reconciliation of Faux Noise and the mango Mussolini, and at last the chance to give the United States the dictatorship it needs ...
Wasn’t it just a few days ago that the Lynch Mob was celebrating Us ratbag Christopher Rufo, claiming that he could change American culture? Perhaps he should have investigated a little further before leading the charge - https://www.theguardian.com/world/2024/jan/14/christopher-rufo-jonatan-pallesen-eugenics-racism-claudine-gay-harvard
ReplyDeleteAs even the Menzies Institute eventually realised, the Caterist is a Grade A dud. It was obvious within hours of Spud’s call for a Woolies boycott that this particular sally in the culture wars just wasn’t going to fly; yet days later here’s the Caterist desperately trying to get it into the air. I assume he’d dashed off his column soon after Dutton’s outburst, thinking he was onto a winner, and the Oz decided to run with it anyway; they had nothing to lose, and it’s not like anyone other than Pond devotees actually reads Cater’s column. Well, perhaps the Speccie editor casts a sympathetic eye over it…..
ReplyDelete"There's only one issue that matters ... the right to buy trinkets..." Now don't belittle trinkets, DP, that's how our ancestors bought Melbourne - well, bought the swamp land that it was eventually built on. Trinkets have played a major role in colonial proceedings here - and in other places.
ReplyDeleteBut having seen that lovely photo of the Australia Day "merchandise", then no, I wouldn't buy any of that, and especially not to celebrate Prison Ships Day.
NickyC: "Advocates [invasion day movement] want to strip our founders of any noble intent and portray them as beyond redemption." What ? Strip them of the "noble intention" of finding somewhere to dump a bunch of convicted criminals that the Brits no longer had any room for in the Thames prison hulks. Yep, that's "noble" alright.
ReplyDeleteNow the first "free settlers" did arrive in the Bellona in early 1793, but keep it in mind that:
"Between 1788 and 1868, about 162,000 convicts were transported from Great Britain and Ireland to various penal colonies in Australia."
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Convicts_in_Australia
And that: "The first free settlers arrived in New South Wales in 1793 but convicts remained in the majority until the great influx of people lured by the gold rushes of the 1850s."
https://www.nma.gov.au/defining-moments/resources/convict-transportation-peaks
So what exactly is the 26 January Australia Day celebrating ?
It's about patriotism, GB. Patriotism! Haven't you got the message yet? Are you a true patriot? Make Australia Great Again! Man the battlefields! The Onion Muncher has spoken; patriotism is one of the foundational features of those born to rule.
DeleteGB and Anonymous - a classic tome which Holey Henry seems not to have taken the time to read is Alexis de Tocqueville's 'Democracy in America'. Perhaps some day the Henry will discover its content, because it goes to explain the origins of the wonderfully convoluted system which makes a President Trump possible in a supposedly enlightened land of the free. For the present maunderings of the Cater, might I quote from the first edition of Alexis' great work, published in 1830, when he reflected on the origins of potential settlers in the several continents that were receiving large numbers of white fellas. After comments on the 'New England' of north America, he wrote (translation) 'Some settlements cannot even boast so honourable an origin: Santo Domingo was founded by buccaneers; and at the present day the criminal courts of England supply the population of Australia.'
DeleteBut, of course, Alexis was both young, and French, so his findings can be disregarded by a sociologist from your average red-brick university in England.
I mentioned the Cater maunderings. For example -
Delete‘Discussion about the meaning of Australia Day is anything but broad. It is depressingly narrow. Participants are drawn from the same restricted circle and the conservations restricted to the same prescribed boundaries as the Aboriginal voice to parliament.’
So - conservations? lazy spell prediction, or confusion in the Cater cranium? Digital filler - something is ‘anything but broad’ followed by it being ‘depressingly narrow’ - tapped out by someone who was listed as a sometime editor. Yes, participants come from a restricted circle - in this case Reptile print, feeding into Sky News, echoing in ADH (where guess who is a ‘presenter’) then back to ‘contributors’ to Reptile print - Sophie Elsworth trying to be several other ‘regulars’, except she drew the short straw for being on deck for January - sprinkle with useta be or didn’t quite make it politicians - and you have your circle - or, to be more precise - lemniscate.
Of course - lower case for ‘voice’, but also now for ‘parliament’?
Yes, quite so, Chad, but did Alexis perchance state how the 'Euro' majority of the population of New Caledonia got there ? Not counting the Algerian refugees that the rulers of France wouldn't allow back onto the sacred homeland soil and packed them off to the Pacific instead.
DeleteGB - you may be aware that Alexis was sent to north America by the French government of Louis Philippe to examine the American prison system. He duly published 'The Penitentiary System in the United States and its Application in France' before finishing his 'Democracy in America'. He had covered a remarkable amount of eastern America and clearly was ever-observant. It is difficult to find mention of the penitentiary system in 'Democracy', and even more difficult to find a copy of 'The Penitentiary System in the United States and its Application in France'.
DeleteHe also visited Ireland - just before the potato blight - and Algeria, from which he was deeply critical of what the French administration was doing, but he was wise enough to stay clear of 'New Caledonia', which seemed to display all the worst aspects of European colonization, penal settlements, blackbirding and, (although the word was not in the lexicon then) genocide.
Not that the pond intends to read the 376 pages, but just to show the pond keeps reading the comments and the poems, here's a pdf facsimile of the 1833 edition. Get it while it's hot ... (it's listed as an insecure download on the pond's machine, so maybe take care - given the material, possibly more incompetence than malice)
Deletehttp://www.davidmhart.com/liberty/FrenchClassicalLiberals/Beaumont/Beaumont_1833PenitentiarySystem.pdf
Dorothy - my thanks, that pdf. has downloaded without problem, is now in the personal archive, and I look forward to working through it. This really is a remarkable weblog, of the kind I think we all hoped for when such things first appeared, and before too many of them degenerated into snarling competitions.
Delete"Go placidly" you reckon, Chad ?
Deletehttps://www.desiderata.com/desiderata.html
Sorry Chadders, apart from poetry and humour, how else to respond to a reptile blitz than with the occasional snarl? Or at least a hunting of the snark ...
DeleteI wish Spud, the Bolter, the Quarry Waters Whisperer, Elsworth, et al success. It will filter out some less sensible customers and make shopping at Woolies a safer, saner experience. AG.
ReplyDeleteBrings to mind the Lizards removing their support for the Adelaide Festival last year, a decision of genius resulting in record attendances; some never learn.
DeleteEllie Dudley: "Australia will never replace the British monarchy as long as there is a No campaign against constitutional change." Yep, that passionate cry of "if you don't know, vote No" will continue on down the generations.
ReplyDeleteBut hey, we Aussies will abandon the British monarchy just as soon as the British do.
Oh, I don’t know, GB; if the Brit’s give the Royals the boot, perhaps we could offer them sanctuary and let them work as some sort of tourist attraction. I believe the throne of the Hutt River Province is currently vacant?
ReplyDeleteYair, good point, Anony - maybe we could get the poms to disassemble a palace or two and re-assemble them out here.
DeleteThe Bromancer: "But that re-set [by China] should not be maintained at the expense of fundamental Australian interests and values." But, BG, butt surely maintaining the 'China re-set' is very much in accordance with Australian interests. And also our values if we value our China trade surpluses.
ReplyDeleteGB quotes The Bromancer;
Delete"fundamental Australian interests and values."
Fortunately there is a value for 'Straylian Values - and "those laws being paramount and overriding any other inconsistent religious or secular “laws"... Thank God! Paramount and Overriding inconsistent religiis or secular "laws" is referring to the kaw of rhe reptiles. Phew. I feel protected.
"Australian values
...
"... parliamentary democracy whereby our laws are determined by parliaments elected by the people, those laws being paramount and overriding any other inconsistent religious or secular “laws""
https://www.homeaffairs.gov.au/about-us/our-portfolios/social-cohesion/australian-values
Boofy: "For middle Australian households that have been waiting 18 months for the government to take action on the cost of living, a decision the Coalition made five years ago offers the first glimmer of hope." So if ScoMo and the Coalition made the decision "five years ago" and then didn't activate it, but now want to criticise Labor for not actually activating it now ...? Que ?
ReplyDeleteLooks like not supporting the Coalition on the Voice, rather than “turning its back on Australia” is the reason to go after Woolworths or perhaps Woolies is no longer advertising in the Murdoch press and this is punishment. The Murdoch media is showing shades of Xi, Putin and Trump.
ReplyDeleteWhile one could argue the Easter Bunny is cultural baggage, Easter comes with more religious baggage than cultural and, as Woolworths is a secular business rather than a theocratic one, I guess it does not have to promote the religious aspect. Leave that to those advocating for theocratic capitalism.
Woolworths doesn’t need to ask their customers, because the customers have already spoken with their wallets. Apparently Nick thinks if a business is not selling particular products, it has turned its back on Australia even though that business helps deliver food for millions of Australians and employs thousands to earn a living.
Good to see Cater has finally caught up with the science on tobacco smoking, even if he and Tony still think other science is “scientism”.
Cater: “nothing good can come from picking at the scabs of history.” So we shouldn’t right wrongs, have museums about the Holocaust, have war museums or apologise and compensate children who were institutionalised and abused. But he expects us to have empathy for him at the offence he feels for what he regards as the trashing of an anniversary he holds dear, because he has to go to Coles to buy cheap stuff to prove he is a true patriot when we all know he favours the British/ American system of class division and gung-ho capitalism.
As a youngster, I really liked green lolly frogs. They’re no longer made, and I was outraged at so unAustralian a decision by the manufacturers . Sure, I (and presumably a lot of others) hadn’t bought any for decades, but that’s beside the point - how dare they!
Delete"...the customers have already spoken with their wallets." You mean that "the customers" believe that they can exercise free choice and reinforce that freedom by when they do, or don't, open their walletts (or wave their mobile phones as they do nowadays). Totally radical idea, Anony, and the reptiles will make sure it never catches on and that "the customers" buy as they are bidden.
DeleteVandalism of a Woolies in Brisbane. Thanks Dutton, the Coalition and the Murdoch media for bringing Trump supporters' to Australia.
ReplyDeleteAngus Taylor: “Trust is a crucial part of our democracy.”
ReplyDeleteWhere was the Beefy one when Morrison was PM? Fully behind his secretive, untrustworthy leader!
Of course the Coalition won’t break any promises should it get elected next election, because so far the policies equal zero and all it’s got is trivial blather from its leader and the deputy of the Liberals knows nothing about anything the party is doing, probably because the federal Liberal Party is an empty vessel. Still, as the saying goes, they make the most sound.
Today’s Sydney Morning Costello reports that Alan Jones is currently in London, with no clear timetable to return to Australia and recommence his narrowcasting activities. Much of the article relates to the groping allegations that have been made against the Parrot, but it also has some fascinating snippets regarding the operation he’s working for (Thrupp is the young bloke who seems to be Jones’ -2IC these days) -
ReplyDelete>>While Jones is the major talent at ADH TV, other conservative hosts include Lyle Shelton, the former head of the Australian Christian Lobby, Nick Cater, a News Corp columnist and senior fellow of the Menzies Research Centre, and self-described “provocateur” Daisy Cousens.>>
>>In May 2020, Jones announced his retirement from Radio 2GB on doctor’s advice. Behind the scenes, Jones was being forced out on commercial grounds as advertisers had boycotted his program over controversial remarks suggesting that then-New Zealand prime minister Jacinda Ardern should have a sock shoved down her throat.
In early November 2021, Jones’ contract was not renewed by Sky News, where Jones had been hosting a nightly television program.
Numerous industry sources expressed surprise that Jones had delegated the contract renewal negotiations with Sky to Thrupp.
Later that same month, corporate records show Australian Digital Holdings, a $1 company, was established by Jack Bulfin, who had just turned 22. Bulfin is the sole director and shareholder.
ADH was the brainchild of Bulfin and Thrupp. In December 2021, at a press conference announcing ADH TV’s launch, businessman and climate change sceptic Maurice Newman said he was “absolutely delighted and excited to announce that Alan Jones has signed with Australian Digital Holdings … of which I am the chair, to launch his digital television show, ‘Alan Jones: Direct to the People’.” Newman expressed his hope that Jones’ audience would be in the millions.>>
>> Jones declined to identify who was funding the network, except to say that the backers broadly shared his view of the world. While Jones is not a backer of the venture, those who have invested are understood to include businessman Marcus Blackmore and former fund manager Simon Fenwick, one of the major donors to the No campaign for an Indigenous Voice to parliament.
Billionaire James Packer, a long-time supporter of Jones, has confirmed he is a backer, while other ADH board members include Nick Cater, barrister Margaret Cunneen, SC, Gillis Delaney law partner Anthony Jefferies and Florida-brd fund manager Rowan Parchi.
It is understood that ADH’s revenue comes from a share of advertising profits from social media platforms such as YouTube. It also has privately sourced advertising.
However, according to Mediaweek, ADH has not reached the hoped-for huge audience. The trade publication’s editor-in-chief, James Manning, said the traffic of unique visitors to ADH TV’s website, where its content can be found, totalled 23,000 in November. In December, while Jones was on leave, that figure rose to 39,000.>>
ADH just isn't the Aussie Fox News then, Anony. Strange how the 'Rabid Right' out here just doesn't get the same results as it does in the USA. But then I guess Sky isn't exactly Fox News is it - no equivalent of Roger Ailes for starters. And certainly not Moorice by any stretch of imagination.
DeleteThe peak 'wingnut' effort out here might just have been de Groot and the Harbour Bridge ribbon.
It could be said that wearing jocks featuring the Australian flag (a sacred Australian icon) is an act of desecration or debasement. Such jocks will be stained with urine and shitty bits too, and eventually thrown in the garbage bin, or perhaps used as rags to clean up vomit.
ReplyDeleteYeah, true-blue Aussie briefs as worn by that great Briton, Muncher Abbott ! (Well, if the Scots can claim Mary just because her parents are Scots, then the Brits must accept responsibility for Abbott).
DeleteIn Dutton’s dream flagged merchandise
ReplyDeleteIs flooding supermarket aisles
Blue ensigns abound in quantity
Great quantity
And all along the checkout queues
Reptiles in caps red, white and blue
Are chanting in echolalia
Astraylia! Astray-lia! Astray-ay-lia!
Kez - count me among those who thought Linger's melody way superior to 'Advance Australia Fair' (well, the average TV food jingle is superior to Advance Australia, but the 'Yo Yo bikkies' jingle was not submitted to that dismal plebiscite). Great job in reversing the order in which Linger managed to match Mrs Carleton's words.
ReplyDeleteCheers Chads 🙂
Delete