In which the reptiles descend into a state of chaos and confusion, and head out the back to go a bit of the biff ...

 

The reptiles are in a fair old state of chaos and turmoil, and not just internationally, though over in the US of A it didn't take long for this October posting to seem prescient ...

It's hard to talk about hate speech without recycling hate speech, but it is possible to note the work and deeds of facilitators, enablers and lick spittle fellow travellers ...

Of course like unhappy tweets, all that disappears into a memory hole, an abyss roughly equivalent to a galactic phenomenon ...

Yes, it's been a bad couple of days and speaking of Orwell, this is how memory loss works ... (WaPo paywall) ...

But enough of all that, because confusion and chaos also reigns supreme at home ...

The pond can't begin to count the number of reptile stories elevating Jacinta Price into the realm of the gods ... or the number of reptile stories and columns raging at the very notion of a voice ... and now the dog botherer has a problem ...

Being inclined to cut off the very worst reptile rants, the pond has paid no attention to Price, and it began opting out of reptile bashing of uppity, difficult, tricky blacks and the voice some time ago ... you end up being a facilitator, and an enabler and a lickspittle lackey ... but this howl of pain from the dog botherer was simply too rich to ignore ... because at one point it turns 'mano a mano', or 'reptile a reptile', as it were ...

You see? For some reason, the dog botherer has stayed loyal to Noel Pearson and the old guard, and now must warn of flying too close to the sun, and proposes public support for the voice is strong, apparently unaware that his fellow reptiles have been gunning for the voice from the start ...

For now, he's just handed out a warning, hinting at a parking fine, let loose a few crocodile tears of the "it would be a great pity" kind, which some might recognise from the old routine of "nice political career you have there, be a shame if something were to happen to it" ... apparently unaware that Price is the current house pet, much loved and patted by his fellow reptiles ...

Ah poor old Ken ... but the pond has already covered that, or at least the infallible Pope did ...

You can see the dog botherer's problem building and building ... until he can take no more and begins to take down his fellow reptiles ... though it's not just 'mano a mano', it's also 'mano a femano', as it were ... (the pond understands that 'mano' is actually feminine, but anything for a bit of word play, down there with cosplay) ...

Yep, there's Dame Slap given a spanking, and after a little more Dame Slap bashing, it's time for a bizarre shot at the bromancer ...

Why bizarre? For some peculiar reason, the dog botherer seems to think that the bromancer is a liberal practising liberalism, which is to say a Tuckyo sitting down to have a chat with Ye about Nazis ...

Those last two pars are so sublime, it makes the pond feel exceptional good. 

As Charlie Sykes himself might have said, when confronted with "A conservative approach looks for pragmatic ways to deliver those liberal ideas of equality", all that's left is "da fuq?" And so to a final gobbet of da fuq he talking about ...

The pond never thought it would be saying this, but good luck to the dog botherer with all that. 

Apparently he's only just discovered what his fellow reptiles have been up to, yet in his day he was part of the marauding pack of malign ratbags intent on destruction, hate, and FUD ... not to mention hefty doses of climate science denialism, and suddenly he's bleating "it just might help make a difference."

The only difference the pond can help with is the bankruptcy of News Corp in Australia. The moral bankruptcy has long been apparent, but an actual physical bankruptcy would be a nice boost to sensible debate ... and there's always the hope that it might just help make a difference.

And so to "Ned", where the same confusion and chaos reigns.

Yesterday, the pond sat through a turgid attempt by the indefensible hole in the bucket man to defend the indefensible and in particular, the carry-ons of the cavorting liar from the Shire  ...

Today, the pond must let all that slide down the ladder into that memory hole once reserved for 1984 ...

From Henry's defence of the indefensible to "the liar from the Sire brought this on himself"?

It's too much ... and all the pond could think to do was to trot out another infallible Pope ...

By golly, the pond doesn't think it could make it through a reptile session these days without a cartoon to hand ... but "Ned" has barely begun to warm to his task of boring the stockings off the pond ...

Did someone forget to tell the hole in the bucket man that the report was balanced and valid? 

Come to think of it, did "Ned" himself pause for a second to consider the implications of putting party above principle, with the fatuous excuse that he should be able to keep sitting in parliament so that his shame might continue as a reprimand to the impotence of the wretched mutton Dutton?

So much confusion, so little regard ... and yet "Ned" tries to dig a little comfort out of the mess, contending the only blunder was not to make the carry-on public ...

Sheesh, it's wretched stuff, boring and tedious, and down there with Faux Noise labouring to hide its love of Nazi lovers ...

And the result for the pond is that it barely has time to touch on other issues, or even celebrate this kind of sublime cartoon ...

That blather reminded the pond of its own German blut, but you can see how cartoons can make a sojourn with "Ned" pass more quickly ...

So finally we got to "The saga remains beyond weird" and the "scheme was folly", not to mention pointless and unjustified, but deeply typical of a man who got booted from tourism, and exercising the Peter principle, got booted upstairs, with the reptiles acting as cheer squad in their usual way ... until the cheering started to sound beyond weird and a deep folly ...

And speaking of deeply weird, please allow the pond another distraction...

And yet there's still two gobbets to go, though that line about the liar from the Shire "project managing it himself" does manage to capture some of the narcissist grandiosity and sense of self-importance and infinite capacity for humbug involved in the caper ...

The pond has done its best with distractions, and thankfully can now limp through the last "Ned" gobbet without visual aids handy ... though with the memory of our Henry's defence of the indefensible still ringing in the pond's ears ...

Thank the long absent lord someone can note dryly and with brevity, and usually that would be it, but our Gracie is back, and those with a memory that lasts a week (count the pond out), will remember that our Gracie was extremely agitated at the state of Victoria, and so she was again today, and so surely she deserves a place in the sun this day, as the reptile chaos and confusion continues, and our Gracie ravages certain "media types" ...

Dear sweet long absent lord, did our Gracie take a swing at Sky after dark? But the dog botherer is on Sky after dark, and this day he's been taking a swing at Dame Slap and the bromancer ... and "Ned" has been putting the boot into Henry, though possibly not realising it, what with them being fierce rivals in the 'too turgid to read' category of reptile scribblers ...

Is this the sort of dog fight the pond used to see in the heat of the noon day Tamworth sun?

Even worse, our Gracie seems quietly pleased at the dog fight, and righteous that the HUN was ignored and Victorians voted quietly as they pleased ...

The pond has celebrated all this many times before ... it has after all become a meme the pond never tires of ...

But somehow it seems as if our Gracie is verging on treachery and betrayal, or at least sounding indecent in her crowing at her fellow reptiles ...

Who are these "media types" she rants about? Who are these "media circles" that need to reassess? Who are these hinderers in the media? What is this talk of rejecting toxic media?

Sections of the media, which they regard as toxic? 

Could this possibly include the HUN? Could this be the final straw? Could our Gracie, calling from inside the house, be ravaging News Corp, just as "Ned" ravaged our Henry,  and the dog botherer took aim at Dame Slap and the bromancer, and all the pond could think of was an unseemly pack of brawling dogs in the noon day heat in Tamworth ...

Turning and turning in the widening gyre   

The shouting reptiles cannot hear the chairman;

Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;

Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,

The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere   

The ceremony of innocence is drowned;

The best lack all conviction, while the worst   

Are full of passionate intensity.

Is there a cartoon to help conjure up the madness and provide a closing visual?

That'll do for the moment. It wasn't a dog fight the pond was watching, it was the reptiles out the back of Maguires, with the beer flowing freely and tempers short, and deep unhappiness and recriminations and chips on shoulders abundant ...