In which it's a standard Monday, and probably a disappointment for keen herpetology students ...

 

 

The pond has been astonished to see the number of people complaining about the current state of Twitter ... on Twitter. This is a bit like a junkie desperately wanting to give up blaming the dealer on the quality of supplies.

Might the pond be so bold as to suggest that almost any other medium might be more useful and appropriate, and the best way to protest is to leave the joint. Conquer the addiction, go cold turkey. Sure, the withdrawal could be painful, but if even cackle-headed Claire can do it, anyone can abandon that key pad needle.

Of late, the pond has noted Tesla drivers have taken to sidling up with a shifty, furtive air, complaining about the lack of quality control and wondering where their reputation as futurist trendsetters with the planet's fate in their hearts and heads has gone south with the Nazi lover.

Tough luck for them, but might the pond suggest that if you have no love for a lover of Nazis - yes, he's allowed actual Storm Troopers back to storm the tweets - you don't have to join these wretches in their fate. 

Of late manufacturers have caught up with Tesla, though it's true in Australia both the marketplace and every level of government hasn't. Still, there's no point in joining these abject loons, once so prideful in their preening and strutting. Drop the desire for futurist preening and posing, and if you want to go EV, look elsewhere than Tesla, and surprise, surprise, you can look smug and condescending at the charger as they sidle up, their pose shattered ...

It's a bit like the notion of paying for herpetological studies. If you can't do it for fun, and for free, what on earth is the point? 

Who in their right minds would pay to line up for a serve of the Caterist on a Monday? If anything, the reptiles should be paying their readership for enduring the drivel, which is now so predictable the pond could scribble a mock Turtle Caterist column in its sleep ... and to prove that point ...

The good news is that the green jobs revolution has begun? As if the coal-loving Caterist has ever given a flying fuck about the fate of the planet ...

Of course it's only so he can deliver what he thinks is a joke about China, but then the dimwitted bulb has never really been able to show a sensa huma.

Is he proposing that the government begin a government-supported solar panel industry here rather than rely on increasingly brutish China?

Likely not, though the pond was surprised to see that other Caterist favourite, nuking the country, given short shrift as a solution ...

Yes, but surely nuking the country was going to fix what ails the planet? Nope, after the usual dissing of reality, and renewables, and the obligatory mourning for dear, sweet, innocent, dinkum Oz coal, at the end of the final gobbet the pitiful situation of being a Caterist will be revealed ...

That's the best he's got? Instead of nuking the country, we must nuke Bowen and consider an early cabinet reshuffle? 

As Caterisms go, that's so feeble, such a lukewarm bath of bullshit, that you could dunk a baby in it without any worry about a warming planet ... but it did confirm what the pond was saying about the need for price sensitivity when it came to spending money on a reptile fix. Who knows, you might end up with an abundance of tomatoes ...and what's the use of them, except to throw at Caterists?

And so to the rest of the reptile scene this day, and the pond couldn't help noticing that the lizard Oz editorialist was, early in the morning, cheek by jowl with the Caterist ...

The pond simply had to give it a go, because reptile denialism is always finding new forms of whining ...

That was beyond the valley of the reptile predictable. When in doubt punish the aged and their carers, the disabled and their carers, children and their carers, the homeless and their carers, and those reliant on a public health system, and their carers ...

And keep on gassing the country and the planet,  though again nuking the country seems to be out of vogue ... for this week at least, though the pond has every confidence it will make a splendid comeback ...

The reptiles will go on hoping that an apocalypse arrives, and voters can then be herded back to the mutton Dutton, and the four year nightmare might be quickly forgotten ... though those delighted by the sight of the infallible Pope on the final issue of The Insiders this year (so soon, cardigan wearers?) will be pleased to see that he's well represented in this year's Behind the Lines exhibit ...

Those were the days, and speaking of SovCits, it's time for a serve of the Major as the pond's bonus reptile offering ...

Indeed, indeed, but speaking of a circus ...

What a joy that you can google away and score a seemingly infinite supply of infallible Pope ...

Meanwhile, the surly, resentful, bitter, simmering tone of the Major is its own reward, and his defiance and his recalcitrant hope a wonder to behold

No doubt some will enjoy that Major line: "just as parts of the media have built audiences by publishing what certain readers agree with" ...

The important thing here is an ability to hit the keyboards with that sort of line without the slightest hint of self-awareness or the nature of irony, because that's the only path to meta-irony, fluff gathering and navel gazing of a Major kind ...

And so to the Major's nostrums, what with the HUNsters and the lizard Oz having done such an astonishingly effective job on comrade Dan ... (there, that's the kind meta-irony the Major should think about acquiring) ...

Ah yes,  "The Coalition's best thinker remains Howard ..."

Or what about that pious talk of uplifting stories of those succeeding in the outer suburbs, much like the notion that the Katerist Kirribilli kapers were producing profound insights into the lot of Kellyville residents and the movement of floodwaters in quarries ...

The pond just had to mention that because it's a something of a pond ritual and what else to do when the Major is in a major mood for self-congratulation, seeking out a PM who not only lost government, but his own seat, as a model for emulation ...

At the moment, it goes without saying, this sort of level of delusion is small beer up against the level of delusion in the United States ...

A GOP representative refused to denounce Donald Trump—even when the former president (and current nominee) called for the termination of the U.S. Constitution.

Rep. David Joyce (R-OH) told ABC’s This Week host George Stephanopoulos that he would support whoever the Republican nominee is in 2024, even if Trump is that person. It came a day after Trump called for a new election on Truth Social: “Do you throw the Presidential Election Results of 2020 OUT and declare the RIGHTFUL WINNER, or do you have a NEW ELECTION? A Massive Fraud of this type and magnitude allows for the termination of all rules, regulations, and articles, even those found in the Constitution. Our great ‘Founders’ did not want, and would not condone, False & Fraudulent Elections!

“Well, again, it’s early,” Joyce said, almost trying to reassure the anchor of his sanity. “I think there’s going to be a lot of people in the primary. I think at the end of the day, whoever the Republican then the pick (sic) I’ll fall in behind.” (That's from the Daily Beast, but the ABC version is on Yahoo here).

Not even the Major can match that level of supine lickspittle lackey fellow-travelling, though to give the Major his due, he's always trying ... turning for an explanation as why there's been an extremely long run of Labor governments in Victoria by invoking one of the best reasons of all ... loudmouth Jeff himself, a constant irritant, a gadfly, a leech, a strutting preening, self-regarding irrelevant bum, in his day as noxious as John "pig's arse" Elliott ...

Ah yes, a positive agenda ... beginning with a deep love of dinkum innocent sweet Oz coal, and an embrace of climate science denialism ...

Only in the la la land the Major inhabits ... though surprisingly, he stopped short of redeeming the liar from the Shire, or his politics of hope, exemplified by his devious attempt to parachute tranny basher Deves into Sydney's north shore ... because that's how the reptiles play the culture wars game ...

So much for the Major blathering about something more powerful than culture wars, as if the culture wars and the black bashing and all the rest of it aren't still going strong ... with martyrs not falling by the wayside, but hanging around to remind us that not holding the hose is still the way to go, and so to be celebrated by cartoonists of the Kudelka kind ...