In which the Major stays missing, and the pond is left with some knob polishers and other reptile knobs ...

 

Not since the 22nd of August have the reptiles, and so the pond, heard from the Major ...

Last time he was seen, he was urging the west to hold firm in face of China's bluster, and then after that bluster, the Major took a powder and disappeared, leaving the pond with this sort of detritus on a Monday ...

So many """" and lizard Oz editorials and the pond began to wonder again about the lizard Oz supply chain for far right loons ...

What a wretched bunch, and it helps explain why the pond decided to spend some quiet time with simplistic Simon and the echo chamber doing a quiet bit of image building, aka knob polishing ...

They also serve, those hagiographers and dusty knob polishers, and this day's duty was ... well, dutiful ...

Hang on, hang on, the pond has been down this path before, it opened the web version ... only to find that it needed to open the web version ... to discover that the web version suggested reverting to the web version ...

Never mind, what's this talk of Lindsay Fox being a transport magnate?

Where the pond and the reptiles come from, the Fox is a tycoon and to be seen in his company is awkward and perhaps even shameful ...

The pond wouldn't have even noticed the tycoon joke except that some lizard Oz reptile insisted on putting the two tales cheek by jowl ... and in one yarn he's just a close mate and a magnate, and in the other he's a tycoon offering cruisey gigs, as billionaire buddies are wont to do on their ultra-luxury cruise ship ...

It's all in the word choice, and now back to the knob polishing by simplistic Simon and the echo chamber ...

Great news, especially with such loyal and devout friends, they're willing to go on the record, and boast of their friendship by putting their name to it ...

Never mind, it's a tough grind for knob polishers, so on we go, because whadda ya kno, the mutton Dutton is into meditation, and has even crossed paths with an organic farm. Why he might even have visited Nimbin ...

Ah, Joycey, good joyce if you want to get your bags on time, and as for the Morrison leadership group model, what a splendid joyce and example to follow  ... and how soon before the mutton Dutton takes on five ministries so he can discuss political tactics with himself?

Sorry, but you didn't expect the pond to get through this guff without a cartoon or three ... but as the infallible Pope has mentioned climate science, rest assured that the mutton Dutton and his hardy team are on the case ...

Rebuild? But there are already some splendid precedents and strategies out there ...

And with summer approaching and that cheery though in place, it was on to the next and final gobbet from the dutiful, hard working knob polishers ...

Splendid stuff, and it was just as well someone was on the case, because when the pond turned to the Caterist, he seemed asleep at the wheel ...

Just two gobbets of guff, and the Canberra cash in the paw lad was done, though there was a most excellent picture of Kirribilli at the start to kick things off ... well, it looks a teeny weeny bit like Kirribilli, with the residents down to their last McMansion and 4WD penny...

The pond realised the problem at once, and it will mortify at least one of the pond's regular correspondents.

On the evidence of the first gobbet, Compass hadn't done a poll, and so the Caterist had nothing to work with, and so he overnight he seems to have become something of a Marxist, with a deep concern for the poor ...

It's true that last week, he was a devout monarchist ...

... but this week he's a devout Marxist concerned with the poor out at Oran Park...

Modelling by Roy Morgan? And Compass Polling dragged in at the last moment to placate the pond and its anxious correspondents, and not even mentioned in the first gobbet as the Caterist raged at the citizens of Mosman?

It reminded the pond of that ancient barb in Crikey back in 2019 ... (paywall?)

Going by our report on Tuesday, the judgment found that Cater actively disregarded the evidence of an eyewitness, which contradicted his false argument that poor flood prevention by the Wagners had created an “inland tsunami”. This news was the opposite of buried: it raced around inner-city pubs where media types gather. The general take was that Cater would now be offered the chance to move out of his salubrious accommodation in Kirribilli and out amongst the suburban culture he has so long celebrated in his writings, but has, for some reason, failed to shift to.

Kirribilli? Salubrious accommodation? Did somebody mention government taxpayer cash in the MRC paw?

Well the pond once lived in Kirribilli and can assure concerned correspondents that it's nothing like Mosman, and is pretty close in terms of suffering and lifestyle to Oran Park... or at least that's what the latest Compass Polling suggested ...

Meanwhile, no news if the Caterist has actually moved to Oran Park, but its hard to understand his bleating, what with the UK government offering a splendid example of how to lift up everyone from the morass, ways to share the pain, a levelling up of the playing field...

And so to the bonus, and the Oreo was in the same turf this day, and once again the pond felt the twinge of the missing Major, as one does apparently with phantom limbs, and for some reason, the pond felt the same about Brexit ...

Britain is in chronic decline?

But it wasn't so long ago that the Oreo was celebrating Britain Brexiting rampant and BoJo on the move against the leftists  ...

Ah, the reformed, recovering feminist at her finest, and the pond only cut her off so it could throw in another chunk of sugary and floury Oreo goodness, with a splendid illustration ...

Sorry, sorry, the pond had to cut the Oreo off at that mention of George Soros, because who knows, next stop might be the Rothschilds, or the international banking system, and we know what that means ... 

Dammit, teh gays have nobbled the orange Jesus, and he's now part of the international conspiracy ...

Now back to Monday matters and a click bait video the pond has managed to neuter...

Note to the Caterist, and concern for Oran Park residents, please read the Oreo to get a tip on how to deal with stupid people reflexively supporting higher wages for hardworking people in low-paid jobs ...

Think of the damage done! What Compass Polling needs is a reformed, recovering feminist to kick things into shape ... or else who knows what might start to happen ...

Never mind, the pond hung around for a final bleat about all that damned climate science nonsense ...

Is there an upside to today's reptile offerings?

Well the pond isn't a woman in Iran or Afghanistan, and that's a bonus, and it also happens to be out of the way of Vlad the impaler and his minions as their Vietnam unfolds, and that's a real plus ...