In which the pond goes away and goes back in time to the glories of the Major ...

By the time this goes to air, the pond will have already spent several days in Melbourne doing an anthropological study of a plague infesting the town.

The source of the disease is obvious enough, but studying the way it has moved out from RMIT in Swanston street to the wider community - far beyond South Melbourne -  requires a forensic investigation.

But enough of environmental hideousness, and architectural filagree Melbourne style.

How to stay true to the weekend contemplation of the reptiles, while away in another town, marvelling at the decline and fall of Victorian civilisation?

All at once, the pond was seized by a metaphysical fit …

Alice was puzzled. ‘In our country,’ she remarked, ‘there’s only one day at a time.’
The Red Queen said, ‘That’s a poor thin way of doing things. Nowhere, we mostly have days and nights two or three at a time, and sometimes in the winter we take as many as five nights together — for warmth, you know.’
‘Are five nights warmer than one night, then?’ Alice ventured to ask.
‘Five times as warm, of course.’
‘But they should be five times as cold, by the same rule —’
‘Just so!’ cried the Red Queen. ‘Five times as warm, and five times as cold — just as I’m five times as rich as you are, and five times as clever!’

Why not go back days and days in time, and lump them together?

Anything reptiles scribble at any time is timeless and can be invoked at any time, and it will still provide unceasing joy to any stray passing reveller, and so the pond decided, like a Tamworth dog of old, to return to the vomit produced by the Major Mitchell last Monday …

In its Tamworth days, the pond was always impressed with the way that parrots could give the impression of human intelligence with a keen glance, though truth to tell, a sleepy galah caught on the road at dawn was a prime candidate for road kill …

But it's been such a long time since the pond marvelled at the Major, why not travel back in time to last Monday?

That blather about the ABC reminded the pond immediately why it no longer missed the Major, the joke of him searching high and low for a missing Order of Lenin medal having run its course, and been mocked far and wide …

What cheek for the humbug to propose ideological blinkers, when the man routinely wears eye covers worthy of an SM masquerade ball ...

You see? The Major isn't your ordinary dumb fuck climate science denialist. Your Major is a proud, righteous, up himself dumbfuck delusional narcissist, boasting about the lizard Oz's startling place in the media world, while preening as an expert in climate science denialism …

And as for that talk of Trump derangement syndrome …

Well the pond apologises for that detour into the NY Times here, but the Major manages it every time … he produces pond derangement syndrome, down there with RMIT syndrome …

The reptiles manage to be a bit more canny in their talk of invaders, infestations, and disease-laden aliens …

They'll probably get there in the end, but meanwhile, the notion of paying for the thoughts of Major Mitchell suggests that on the right day you can fool punters into buying a half-warmed, sawdust-laden pie at a sporting event ...

Before the pond gets on to those examples, if the lizard Oz is doing so wonderfully well, why do they keep on bleating on about the ABC, or drifting back to nostalgia la la land when they could berate the Fairfaxians? It seems the Major can't come to grips with the papers now being owned by Nine … 

Another feature is the way that the reptiles shamelessly recycle their talking points over and over again, borrowing from fellow reptiles to harp away at the same old same old ...

There he goes again, attempting to set off the pond's derangement syndrome, but when it comes to being a righteous parrot, the pond was intrigued to see this in a piece by Guy Rundle for Crikey on the Folau matter ...

Israel Folau didn’t use any such language in his own proselytising it should be noted; the mention of “idolators” going to hell covers not only non-Christians, not even only non-Protestants, but also those Protestants who vary from Folau’s specific beliefs. The “synagogue of Satan” reference is so sizzling that it was left out of Brad Norington’s coverage in The Australian — either by Norington himself, or excised by subs conscious of the pro- and anti-Folau factions in the Oz.

Excisions, ideological blinkers, a reptile house divided against itself?

That sounds like a fit subject for a Sunday meditation, but the pond will not be denied another little outburst …

And now to a beautiful parrot "tell" ...

Well there's a set of tidy lies, dressed up by the Major with nostalgia about the way he set it all up. The reptiles rarely pay attention to the many stories doing the rounds about the planet, and the effects being observed and explained by climate scientists.

Note instead first the talk of climate scientists, and in opposition, the "many people who disagree: and "readers", and it's not until the end that the Major remembers to throw in "many prominent senior scientists".

It's nonsense of course, and there's a vast world outside the lizard Oz and the ABC who have paid attention to actual events in the world, such as Greenland's ice wasn't supposed to melt like last week until 2070 …

What do the reptiles serve up instead, and expect mug punters to pay for the pleasure?

Oh fucketty fuck, more blather about the ABC and groupthink, when the lizard Oz reptiles are saturated in groupthink kool aide drinking sessions.

The dog botherer as a climate scientist, the Bolter, and the rest of the pack of ideologically blinkered clowns?

By Sunday it'll be a tad late, but instead, here's the infallible Pope on a subject that should have intrigued the reptiles …

And so to a bonus …

Now the pond will confess to having only one motive for running a piece from the WSJ:

That mention of Putin set the pond off … and David Rowe has been having a fine old time with Moscow Mitch … (and as always there's more Rowe here).

 

The days of the United States posing as a protector of, and an example to, the supposedly free world have long gone. And yet delusional reptile scribblers, beavering away for Chairman Rupert still trot out the same old memes ...

Yes, but let's not wonder how long before Bolton manages to produce a war somewhere in the world, while the Trumpists ensure that the Taliban regain power in Afghanistan, and those fundies will no doubt go on to ban music, women and all those other tricky bits they don't like …

Let's just celebrate where the United States has reached ...

And so to a final gobbet of examples of the American delusion at work ...

The autocrat in Moscow is complaining? Now there's a rich one, and that's why the pond thought it such fun to read ...