In which the pond attempts to catch up on much reptile business, while studying for a diploma in 'yes buttism' …

Sheesh, just as the pond goes away for a break, The Graudian steps up and lets rip on the reptiles …

Well, it was all here, but this set the tone …

Speaking of a lack of balance and predictability, the climate science denialism has been palpable in recent times, with the unbalanced, predictable pack of reptiles producing a flurry of stories, all because it seems the dreadful ABC has misled Pacific islanders, who now operate under the delusion that things are a little funny/peculiar with the world's climate … and that maybe coal has something to do with it …

Out they all came, and this is but a mere sampling because, truth to tell, there's never much reason to read beyond the headlines …

Moorice was naturally front and centre …but Dame Slap also stepped into the breach ...

  

Will they never tire of blather about 'virtue-signalling'?

And in a bid to become the rag's leading climate scientist, the dog botherer was all the go …

 

But hold on dog botherer, the rag still has Lloydie and Dame Groan …

 

How deep and wide-ranging was the level of the delusion? 

Well apart from coal being the new sheep - think of all those sheep-fucking jokes that can now serve for the sight of Lloydie humping a piece of coal - the level of delusion ranged far and wide ...

 

Meanwhile on another planet the pond couldn't help noticing the odd warning sign, as in this story in the Washington Post, or even while trying to relax with a little US news …

And there was a positive flurry elsewhere …

One possible solution is simply to buy Greenland and hide all the evidence, and never mind the twenty two trillion debt ….

Yes amazingly that was a Donald story, worth bearing in mind further down this page, but meanwhile, the steadfast reptiles stuck with the plan …

Good old Lloydie, what an environmentalist he is …humping away at his lump of coal …

And naturally the Oz editorialist showed who was in charge of the charging reptiles …

Talk about delusional.

But the plot got even weirder thanks to this week's Weekly Beast, still ripping away at the reptiles here … and revealing a shocking truth …

The pond was aghast … it realised suddenly that it's main audience was white supremacists, racists, Donald-lovers, and other assorted ratbags and coal humpers …and even though they now had to wait until each weekend for their clippings from the pond, addled far-right wing loons in search of a reptile fix would still show up …

And sure enough, to add fuel to the flames, along came the dog botherer with an unadulterated exercise in excellent "yes buttism" …

This is where a reptile pretends to be balanced, and deliver a considered, thoughtful assessment, but instead produces a "yes, billy goat, butt" conclusion …

See the dog botherer in action and admire …

Yes, yes, roll the jaffas down the aisle, this was a loon who only a few days ago was, in a dose of reckless rhetoric, fuelling a climate of hate at Australia's Pacific neighbours, calling them silly and insulting …but stick with it, because truly we will arrive in due course at a classic "yes, but" moment …

Uh huh … well the first thing to do here is to establish that psychos walk both sides of the fence, as a prelude to establishing the Donald's innocence …

Uh huh … shocking stuff, but par for the reptile course … naturally in support of the Donald, his love of white supremacy jargon, his undiluted racism and his devotion to conspiracy theories, though these have been a boon to cartoonists …

But the pond can't pause to contemplate a backlog of cartoons … it must press on to get to the  classic 'yes but' moment, even if there's a lot of buttisms to cherish along the way, including the one that begins the second sentence here ...

Indeed, indeed, it's all Biden's fault … you see the Donald might be a tad polarising, but really it's those bloody Democrats cranking up the rhetoric …

Okay, okay the pond promised to rush on helter skelter to that 'yes but' moment, even though there's been plenty of buttisms and buttock dog humping by the dog botherer on show ...

And now to take it a step further and do a right and proper dog whistle … you see, it's all the fault of fake news and fake columnists ...

By golly, any white supremacist far right Donald lover would leave the dog botherer content that, in a clever, inverted way, the dog botherer has delivered an astute smack down of the Donald's critics … and so to a final, truly awesome "yes butt, billy goat, butt" moment ...

Yes, it's the Donald who is legitimate, and it's all the fault of Biden, the Democrats, fake news, and, as Brett Easton Ellis would say, whatever …

But wait, not convinced by that dreadful Weekly Beast story, and its ominous conclusion about the reptile, and so the pond's, readership?

It goes without saying that the pond is too humble and small to compete with News Corp, but please, it does its best to share reptile rants with far-right groups, and our Henry wasn't willing to let the dog botherer do it alone ...

Our Henry beat the dog botherer to the punch by coming out with this excellent post yesterday, but it seems to the pond a most excellent contribution to the cause, and one well worth sharing with Donald lovers and other white supremacists ...

Indeed, indeed, and because our Henry is generally a dullard, the pond thought that even specialist readers who might make it through to the 'yes, but, billy goat, butt' ending might appreciate the odd cartoon …

You see, our Henry will stroll through history and mention Madison and founders and tradition, and ignore anything of any alternative, cartoony kind ...

But now back to old Henry, busy with  his buts and his Madison and free trade, and sssh, don't mention the tariffs being paid for by the Chinese ...

Yes, yes, it's free trade everywhere, and stability in the marketplaces around the world, and everything's for the best in our Henry's world …

And now back to our Henry explaining how everything is for the best in Donald's wonderful world …

Indeed, indeed,, though the pond does wonder why the Europeans need to spend any money on defence, when everyone now knows that the Russians are their new friends … and the Donald's friends, and Mitch's friends, and Kentucky's friends, and possibly our friends too …because we all love dictatorships when it comes to the crunch ...

And so to the penultimate celebration of our Henry going full Donald, explaining how we live in normal times and everything is for the best …

You'd almost swear that the Donald and his administration were competent and knew what they were doing, thanks to the astute apologetics of our Henry.

But please white supremacists, don't thank the pond for doing your work. Just take these clippings of the dog botherer and our Henry and share them on Facebook or wherever else you like …and please remember that the skilled apologist will always end with a 'yes but' moment …

And what do you know, our Henry even makes it obvious by beginning with a 'but' ...

Silly old Henry … does he actually think he and his column, and the dog botherer, and all the climate science denialism and the bromancer's Brexit delusion and so on and so forth serve a sensible purpose?Could it be that the rag is drifting off into a predictable form of far right irrelevance?

Well here's another issue for our Henry to explain away …

And here's the Donald's cry, as heard in what's left of the wild …

And here's to all that's normal in the modern reptile world as they feed the far right, conspiracy-loving, gun-totin' loons ...

You're welcome … have a nice coal-humping day, and come on back, ya hear, for more predictable Donald lovin' of the tedious and predictable kind …