The pond should start off by noting that it hasn't taken long for the reptiles to get back into peak form, rather like the Australian cricket team …it's never too early in the year to get the fear-mongering into gear, what with an election just around the corner ...
A SPECIAL INVESTIGATION? Wouldn't it be simpler to run a story, WHATEVER YOU DO, DON"T VOTE FOR COMRADE BILL, THE SKY WILL FALL DOWN …
And as sure as there's a heatwave, the reptiles will just as surely wheel out Bjorn, full of bland reassurance …
There were other sightings too, the dog botherer was out and about and Helen of Dale was given a spot, but here's the thing …
The pond has decided it wants a dollar each time that 'leets are mentioned, and two dollars when said perfidious 'leets cop a caning, in a rag flung together in the heart of Sydney town …
The pond has decided it wants a dollar each time that 'leets are mentioned, and two dollars when said perfidious 'leets cop a caning, in a rag flung together in the heart of Sydney town …
There was the dog botherer railing at the 'leets at the end of his piece…
And here was Helen of Date having a go at the 'leets at the end of her piece
So-called 'leets? Superannuated 'leets?
And yet funnily enough these assaults on the 'leets came within cooee of the thumbs at the bottom of the columns, designed to establish that the dog botherer and Helen Dale were truly 'leet.
Why Helen of Dale had even studied law at Oxford, and comically, could write "in truth" in her concluding par, when in truth her first novel lacked a little of the truth …
And yet funnily enough these assaults on the 'leets came within cooee of the thumbs at the bottom of the columns, designed to establish that the dog botherer and Helen Dale were truly 'leet.
Why Helen of Dale had even studied law at Oxford, and comically, could write "in truth" in her concluding par, when in truth her first novel lacked a little of the truth …
But enough of these comedy stylings. When in doubt the pond always turns to a firm favourite, and he'll know the cause of all the world's problems … the bloody ABC …and if anyone's obsessed enough with the ABC to write at length about its obsessions, then surely the obsessive Polonius qualifies ...
Oh and wretched independents too, but here the pond should confess … because looking at the impending election in New South Wales, the pond wouldn't mind a decent independent in its electorate, given the dire state of the major parties, one unable to construct a simple tram line, the other led by someone the pond still can't name, and the Greens in a deep melt-down …
Heresy of course, and that's why the pond is always in need of Polonial advice and correction ...
Thanks to that illustration, it immediately dawned on the pond what the real problem was.
It isn't an infatuation with independents, it's an infatuation with bloody women. Look at them, all smiling and waving, and yet ruining everything …
And we all know the sort of ruin that can lead to. Why it can make the dog botherer go off like a rabid dog, frothing and foaming, and unable to get a decent manly shave …
It isn't an infatuation with independents, it's an infatuation with bloody women. Look at them, all smiling and waving, and yet ruining everything …
And we all know the sort of ruin that can lead to. Why it can make the dog botherer go off like a rabid dog, frothing and foaming, and unable to get a decent manly shave …
Ah those bloody 'leets again, but the pond promises not to get distracted, Polonius has the floor and Polonius must be heeded ...
Demolishing the authority of the Prime Minister?
She actually had authority? Sorry, the pond thought she was there so she could be a figure of fun for American cartoonists …
Of course the current predicament might have had something to do with the way May shamelessly wound down the clock, thinking if she had everybody's backs to the wall, they'd cave, and sign up for a deal that no one apart from her liked, which is hardly the way to establish any kind of authority …
But there the pond goes again, thinking heretical thoughts, and deeply in need of Polonial correction ...
Dear sweet long absent lord, the pond didn't realise things had got so serious with Polonius in his dotage.
He's taken to talking of "essential facts" when essentially he's sounding like someone channeling Boris, or perhaps Rees-Mogg or Nigel, and he's doing it by offering up an alternative virtual counterfactual history … still railing at the bureaucrats of Brussels and offering more "Ifs" than a Lindsay Anderson film …
He's taken to talking of "essential facts" when essentially he's sounding like someone channeling Boris, or perhaps Rees-Mogg or Nigel, and he's doing it by offering up an alternative virtual counterfactual history … still railing at the bureaucrats of Brussels and offering more "Ifs" than a Lindsay Anderson film …
If the EU …
David Cameron might have …
May might have …
David Cameron might have …
May might have …
The Brits decided to go their own way, and yet they should have been mollycoddled by the EU. When the pond hears that sort of plaintive weeping, it's usually in the company of a teenager …
David Cameron might have been a visionary in a completely alternative universe …instead of scuttling away from the scene of the crime like a loon and leaving May to pick up the pieces ...
Suddenly the pond was plunged into the world of counterfactuals conditionals, with Greg Hunters heading off here …
David Cameron might have been a visionary in a completely alternative universe …instead of scuttling away from the scene of the crime like a loon and leaving May to pick up the pieces ...
Suddenly the pond was plunged into the world of counterfactuals conditionals, with Greg Hunters heading off here …
Rather than go down that rabbit hole of Polonial "what ifs", might the pond just take time out to celebrate the return of the weekly Beast, which can be found here …
It contained this delicious follow-up to a matter the pond first noted in Crikey …
The pond immediately understood Bernard's confusion.
You see, Christine Ahern is blonde. It's immediately apparent that her status as a blonde is relevant. There's clearly a link between criminally bad journalism and risky conduct, home country conflict trauma, working for Today or perhaps the lizard Oz, and trying to work out a way to escape and get into some kind of media refugee resettlement program …
You see, Christine Ahern is blonde. It's immediately apparent that her status as a blonde is relevant. There's clearly a link between criminally bad journalism and risky conduct, home country conflict trauma, working for Today or perhaps the lizard Oz, and trying to work out a way to escape and get into some kind of media refugee resettlement program …
But the pond will leave it up to readers to make their own assessment of the possibilities of blonde jokes, and crude meaningless caricatures, stereotypes and irrelevant details, because it has a Pope cartoon which calls out for attention …
Well there's more relevant Pope here, and now it's back to Polonius for a final gobbet …and wouldn't you know it, as well as standing firm on Brexit, Polonius is still a Donald man …which amazingly makes him a Putin man … hating the EU and NATO and all that European experiment nonsense ...
The present partial shutdown of the US government is just a manifestation of America's current discontent? Silly pond, there it was thinking it was just a matter of the Donald having a massive sulk and temper tantrum over a rampantly stupid, ineffective and expensive solution to border security ...
As for someone complaining about the American constitution? How pleasing to see that Polonius is a stern originalist and no variations or amendments (never mind there's been a few) will be tolerated.
Why that's as shocking as complaining about the way the Senate is currently constituted, that unrepresentative swill …
As Gerard Henderson has noted,
Whatever its complaint [about the Senate], the first Howard government did get most of its programme through the Senate-with the help of the Democrats and Independents… (here).
Oh not those bloody independents again …
Well that was a trip around the mulberry bush with no particular insight on offer ...
Never mind, the pond realises that Polonius only raised the matter of the Donald so that the pond could end with a few more cartoons …
Now the Scott Bennett Politics and Public Administration Group said that "A Senate in which the Coalition and the Labor Party each had one-half of the members, would probably be more rigid..."
ReplyDeletehttps://www.aph.gov.au/About_Parliament/Parliamentary_Departments/Parliamentary_Library/Publications_Archive/CIB/cib9899/99cib10
Ok, maybe, but what about a parliament in which the Lib/Nats hold a majority of senate seats ? After the 2004 election it was: Libs 33 seats, Nats 5 seats and Country Liberal Party (the Northern Territory Lib/Nats) 1 seat = 39 seats out of 76. So little Johnny Howard had a majority in both houses. He had total control of the Australian parliament.
And what did he do with that power ? Why, he so enthralled and entranced us Australian electors that at the very next Federal election (2007) the Lib/Nats lost a combined 22 lower house seats and 2 senate seats, and the Great Leader was one of the lost seats. Yep, little Johnny Howard was unceremoniously bundled out of his own seat.
Now that's what a "rigid senate" does for you.
At the risk of being a bit pedantic myself I would suggest Polonius is incorrect that a majority of British people voted for Brexit. Only 72.21% of voters fronted to vote - so only 51.9% of 72.21% = 37.47% of eligible voters(shoot me down GB).
ReplyDeleteIt may seem like nit-picking but given the ongoing chaos is it reasonable to ask whether the no-shows were simply indifferent or really couldn't decide at that time?
Yes, Befuddled, an expensively-educated pedant like Polonius should know the correct term here is a plurality, not a majority.
DeleteWell played, sir.
If only Cameron had thought to require a majority, they wouldn't be in this mess. Or learned from that sewer-rat Howard in the Republic referedum that pitting a particular exit model, rather that a simple "who wants out?" would have ensured Brexit was never actually a thing. But the Cameron was always a pretty dim bulb.
Nope, your calculations are quite correct, Bef. And FD's comment is spot on as usual.
DeleteBut then, that is the kind of result you get in a "revered" political system in which voting is basically 'first past the post' which very frequently results in a minority (aka plurality) victor.
And just to think that Britain's very own Rev. Charles Lutwidge Dodgson was one of the first serious theorists of voting: "Francine F. Abeles traces the development of Dodgson’s theory of voting from its beginnings in his participation in the academic affairs of the University of Oxford to his attempts to influence the outcome of bills before the British Parliament affecting the extension of the voting franchise and the redistribution of seats in the House of Commons.
Collected together for the first time, these writings deal with such topics as ranking methods, voting anomalies, sophisticated voting, proportional representation, apportionment, and applications of game theory to voting strategies."
https://www.upress.virginia.edu/title/2821
Just for comparison, in the Australian Marriage Law Postal Survey, in which voting was, contrary to our usual practice, not compulsory, here are some comparative numbers: the percentages of enrolled voters by state who actually voted:
New South Wales 79.5
Victoria 81.7
Queensland 77.9
Western Australia 78.4
South Australia 79.7
Tasmania 79.7
Australian Capital Territory 82.5
Northern Territory 58.4
Note that 'leetist ACT only marginally outscored Victoria and both were comfortably higher than all other states and territories (especially anti-leetist NT).
Anyone who quotes David Horowitz as an "authority" on on any topic to do with politics and culture obviously has their head well and truly stuck up their butt.
ReplyDeleteThe Horowitz view as reported by Polonius is, apparently, that "...for the first time since Abraham Lincoln's election in 1860, the mainstream opposition party in the US has refused to accept the legitimacy of the democratically elected president."
DeleteBut if Horowitz's own nonsense doesn't provide proof of his inadequacies, what then ? We are dealing with people who would consider Bjorn Lomborg and Ian Plimer as "authorities" too, Anony, so why not Horowitz ?