In which the pond spends quality meditative Sunday time with the Stolidus class ...

Some might see virtue in organising a society around groupings, classes if you will, containing Erudites, Amity, Candor, Dauntless and Abnegation, but Australia's worked it out a lot more simply by offering just three useful groupings to join - the Avaricious, the Inutilis and the Stolidus …

The Stolidus has been getting quite a bit of airplay of late, thanks in part to that man Karl Stefanovic, who lives in the glass house now known as The Verdict where the Stolidus are allowed to shout at each other...

The pond was moved to note that when you google Karl's name, this is the photo that turns up as the most favoured one ...

Oh you huggable Stolidus you, but really, you're not the sort for Shailene Woodley or even the divergent pond ... (but isn't Theo James such an enchanting, brooding, melancholy, tear-stained, almost Heathcliffian figure, and never mind, teenage girls, if he's old enough to be your father, he suits the pond, and isn't it nice to see a film franchise for the female demographic) ...

Sweet Solidus Karl allowed the Stolidus Pauline Hanson to throw all sorts of incredibly silly stones all over the place just recently, because let's face it, we can never get enough of the monstrous stupidity put on display in first outing by the Stolidus in The Verdict:

As usual, the most important thing the pond took from it was a reminder of the existence of Coleyville in Queensland, but the great leader of the Stolidus class - albeit one of many - was in exceptional form chatting with the Stolidus of morning television:

The controversial leader of One Nation came out swinging on the program after being asked about suggestions she was a “white supremacist”, saying “what a load of hogwash”. 
“I’ve never said one racist thing in my life,” Hanson said. “I speak the way I see it and I speak the truth.” 
Stefanovic picked up Hanson’s combative vibe early, telling her: “you’re on fire this morning”, but that did not stop him from antagonising her further by asking whether she had any Muslim friends. 
“I possibly may have, I have met Muslim people over the years by all means,” Hanson said, adding that she didn’t ask about the religious background of those she met. 
When pushed she said: “I went down to Bankstown and met some Muslim women who stood around and had a chat with me that time. 
“But that’s not the whole point here, Karl, whether you speak to people or not, you look behind the scenes at what they are teaching in the Koran.” 
She said she would like to see an Imam come out and denounce “section 4.882 I think or 89 of the Koran” which instructs that pagans who were nonbelievers should be slayed. 
When Stefanovic pointed out there was stuff in the Bible that could be taken literally too, Hanson said “I hear this all the time”, before saying that was in the first testament, “the second testament is totally different”. 
Stefanovic continued to prod her on the issue, asking whether she would accept a Muslim into One Nation. 
Hanson said her party’s membership forms didn’t ask what religion people were before admitting: “I can’t see any Muslim wanting to sign up to my party”. 
She also repeated comments she made in 2010 that she would not sell her house to a Muslim. 
“I haven’t jumped on the bandwagon in the last five minutes like a lot of other people,” she said. “I have been saying they are incompatible, their beliefs, their culture, their laws, their way of life is incompatible with the Australian way of life and until we come to grips with that, it’s not going to change and this is not the last murder of terrorism that we will see on our streets.” (incredibly, there's more here if you want to lacerate yourself, but isn't that why they invented cut-throat razors?)

That led the Twitterati to remind the world of another outing by the Stolidus candidate back in 2007, which can be found in full here, but which contains this tasty opening:

The pond thought the biggest problem might have been the flashing of his dick in the direction of Hanson contrary to his marriage vows, but it's very grand of the Stolidus class that they should believe in open marriage ... do it, but just don't lie about doing it ...

Okay, you've guessed it, all this is mere evasion by the pond, and an attempt to avoid the Stolidus representatives who turn up to chatter in the Sunday Terror, none better at the job than Miranda the Devine ...

The pond had a vision the other day when this sprang up on the front digital page of the Terror ...

Now you might think the pond photoshopped that, but for a moment, that's what appeared. The heart skipped a beat - oh frabjous joy, could it be? Not a single member of the inner city hipster Surry Hills 'leet with a single thought or a column? The bunker gone silent, and buried, as if concreted under a Berlin car park ...

Of course it was just a dream, or a delusion, and soon enough the technical glitch resolved and it was back to the usual dross:

Now there are some that think that the Devine is higher in the Stolidus ranks than Pauline Hanson, but in reality her latest outing shows she's as stupidus, as bardus, fatuus, stultividus, brutus, indocilis and hebes as the rest of the class, and capable of uttering lines as quaint as "I've never said one racist thing in my life."

Thus the Devine spends an entire column explaining how she's not afflicted by Islamophobia, and then promptly displays a fine example, akin to the treatment dished out to Sol Trujillo, not for his inane policies, but his Hispanic background.

Now in this sort of case, we need a figure to hate, and the Terrorists make sure we know who the straw dog for the day is ...

Sorry, the pond couldn't resist the full screen panoramic effect, it just seemed to set the tone for a Devine piece ...

Now it takes a little while for the Devine to kick in to full Stolidus mode, so you have to wait a little while to get to the celebratory, wild-eyed bashing of the piñata...

Oh is that hard to read?

Sorry, but just thank the pond for keeping the full comedy framing, and don't bother to click on it, it's just another attack on the inner urban monocultural enclaves - because after all, the Terror is full of a wide range of Islamic columnists and as for the breadth and diversity of the correspondents at the reptile Oz, why it's simply astonishing, what with all the Hindus and the Chinese communists and so on and so forth, and besides, isn't Australia wonderfully diverse and totally forgiving and embracing?

Well except when one of the wretches puts their head up and deserves a jolly good kicking. So lets get into the heart of it and give that pesky Ahmed Fahour a bloody good thrashing for perpetuating the grievance mentality:

Yes, you bloody morally superior wog, mind your manners and accept your pay cheque, because Christian Muslims are welcome in this land ...

Or some such thing ...

It doesn't really matter. The point here is that the Stolidus class is so dumb that they can't even see that, while pretending to extend the hand of tolerance, all they can offer is resentment and bitterness and bile, and leading off with the size of the pay cheque and then denying Fahour the right to express his point of view, which is as classic an example of bigotry as those out in the streets protesting about mosques ...

And if you dare to mention the Stolidus are a little bit 2 be 4 that's moral superiority, as opposed to seeing that you can't have your cake and eat it.

You can't express how inexpressibly tolerant you are, and then express forcefully a rabid intolerance, unless you're as thick as a reptilian viper like the Devine.

As for the rest, the Devine maintains excellent form and control:

Well of course she'd support VW. What great little vehicles they make, and what a long and proud history the company has, those producers of wagons for the volks ...

Once again the Devine shows her astonishingly flexible attitude to cheating ... because it's okay if it's only about climate change, which is nonsense anyway, so why does anyone care? Remember that class, you can cheat in science because that's what climate scientists and evolutionists do all the time ...

As for Malware, naturally the Devine would quote hard right man Dominic Perrottet approvingly, and deplore the comedy stylings Malware put on display in his stand-up routine for the NSW Liberals.

Malware should realise that the right wing of the Liberal party has absolutely no sensa huma ... though the pond found his speech full of rip snorting, thigh slapping comedy gold ...

Those lines about Liberals not doing deals in back rooms and not being run by factions or by big business had the pond rolling the jaffas down the aisle ...

As for his exuberant and uxorious praise of Tony Abbott, the pond almost fainted with delight, before beginning to wonder why there'd been any need at all to dump such an outstanding statesman ...

It's covered in the Graudian here, but the pond has a special word of praise for Mike Baird's band of backroom boys for crafting this zinger which apparently produced rapturous laughter ... because it's just soooh funny ...

“The thought of Bill Shorten becoming prime minister — I would rather spend more time with my mother in law,” Mr Baird said. “Look she’s not watching this. And if she is, Pauline, it’s a joke, I love you a lot.”

A mother in law joke, albeit without the rolling pin that would have been obligatory in the good old days ... by golly there might still be an opening on the comedy team doing the scripts for Bewitched ...

The pond thinks Baird is onto a winner here, and commends other grand forms of 1950s humour to his writers for their attention ...

And let us now give thanks to those who made this meditative Sunday piece possible, and the heady fragrance that wafts into the air thanks to the inspiration of the Devine...