Damn it, where's that rattan cane ...

(No links or video, screen cap only)

Rancour?

A very intense and at times somewhat rancorous debate?

Well there was only one side producing the rank discourse and the rank insults, aided and abetted by the Murdochian tabloids, who just couldn't get enough of the rattan cane.

Even if the unseemly sights were "too gruesome to be broadcasted" ... (sic and so and thus, you can see it with your own eyes)

Please sir, can we have another?

Scott "speaking in tongues" Morrison was the most expert at the rancourous biliousness, as per the story above:

Opposition immigration spokesman Scott Morrison has likened the treatment of asylum seekers in Malaysia to the treatment of Australian cattle in Indonesia. 
Both were equally shocking, he said, as the Coalition succeeded in pushing for a Parliamentary inquiry into Australia's immigration detention network. 
Mr Morrison said he was shocked by an ABC TV report showing graphic footage of cattle being mistreated at a number of Indonesian abattoirs. 
“I'm equally shocked by the fact of the treatment that people receive in Malaysia on the basis of reports that we receive,'' he said today. 
“If we are going to be consistent about these matters then I think the conditions these people will be held and treated in Malaysia is a relevant question this parliament should be asking the prime minister.'' His comments come as refugees in Kuala Lumpur's suburban slums say they have been tortured in Malaysia's detention centres. 
Gruesome personal accounts include claims of beatings with rattan canes and whippings - a fate that could await the 800 refugees the Federal Government intends to send to Malaysia as part of its controversial detainee swap.

Consistent in these matters?

No doubt that explains Tony Abbott's "act of contrition" to the head of the people abattoirs, the vindictive beast who in other days might have been caught running Belsen, as you can read in Abbott offers 'act of contrition' to Malaysia over asylum seeker criticism.

Apology?

Indeed. There in black and white in the sensationalist tabloid stories - replicated dozens of times, too many to be repeated here - can be found direct criticism of Malaysia, its government and its "cattle people rattan cane culture" by the Liberal party's head honchos.

So what does Abbott say?

"Our criticism was never of Malaysia, it was of the former government."

Which is a lie, and a rather bold, bald-faced lie, which even the wretched Fairfaxians point out in their story was a nonsense, with Abbott himself, Morrison and jolly Joe all pinged for abusing Malaysia.

So in order to repair a shameless lie you tell a shameless lie? Strange, the pond can't remember the Dominican nuns running that line ...

In the usual way, the hagiographers have been running the line that apologies and saving face are big in Asian culture, and this is true, but it's also true that many Asians have long memories of the demon activities of the colonialists.

Luckily for Abbott, Malaysia is used to politicians who lie to stay in power - a politician who lies to get power, and then lies about the lies with a glib apology is perfectly within their remit.

Also lucky - and in the way of bullies - he picked on a country with less clout than Indonesia and China, and likely enough the Malaysians will stay pragmatic, even if in the manner of the Irish they don't forget ...

What the pond finds extraordinary is that Abbott thinks all can be wiped from the slate, and from the chrysalis of lies a statesman has emerged, as opposed to a used car salesman and exploiter of parliamentary benefits in order to attend sporting festivals.

Never mind, perhaps the mood change came about because of Barners one day expert tour of Malaysia, thanks to the taxpayer.

Yep, good old Barners, showing the benefits of rorting, by bringing the government up to speed, as he discovered that Malaysia had actual highways of the sort you might almost find in Australia, unless heading north on the Pacific highway ...

Whatever, it's now clear the smirking, smarmy Abbott thinks you can piss all over your neighbours - including PNG - and then a few apologetic words will set things right.

Uh huh. So where are we now?

Well yesterday, the Fairfaxians in an editorial judged the Abbott government as on the nose, after only one month in the gig, as you can read in Abbott one month on: too many excuses, too few surprises.

What's astonishing about this is not the judgment on Abbott - all the excuses on offer for the rorting, and the hypocrisy, and the denialism about buying the boats and paying informers, or the new "discuss stopping the boats and hope for the best" or sundry other bits of revisionism, or the way these transparent excuses reflect a disdain for voter trust ...

As if Abbott cared for trust when what he wanted was the precioussss ...

Abbott has always been shameless, and if Peter Hartcher hadn't been so busy recycling the thoughts of former chairman Rudd, and the Fairfaxians so intent on digging the dirt on Labor, they might have actually paused occasionally to note it ...

Not that there's anything wrong with endless recycling of the thoughts of a grand narcissist, if that's your kink, but there are other things in life, and the Fairfaxians never took their eye off the narcissist.

No, what's on the nose is that the rag thinks it can spin on a dime, and discard the vote of confidence it gave Abbott little more than a month ago - The Age the only exception - as the Murdochians and Fairfaxians clustered like sheep in the top paddock, and only now seem to have discovered they were in the grip of a woolly-minded group think.

The time for giving Abbott and his lack of policies, or his policies - sure to change once in power - or his rorting Slippery ways - a tough time was back then.

Now it's too late, and the sanctimonious righteous indignation of the Fairfaxians is as comical as the excuses being invented by the rorters ...

It's too late to point out the wretched region-wide activities of Abbott and his minions, and it's too late for this sort of pious indignation:

After a disappointing first month, the government needs to move quickly to meet the standards it set itself. No excuses.

Oh pull the other one. The very nature of the way Dr. No came to power has tainted so many areas where level-headed consensus would have been so much better, and abusing Malaysia as a people abattoir is just one of them ...

If Abbott is using excuses, then what pathetic excuses can the Fairfaxians offer for their pathetic coverage of Abbott in opposition?

Now you can't ask this question of the reptiles in the lizard Oz. The hagiographers are too busy writing a steady stream of excuses and ongoing denunciations of whoever refuses to worship at their Liberal shrine ...

The pond however is feeling pleased.

After all, we predicted that the Abbott government might well come to reputation as low and as wretched as Macolm Fraser's government - having inveigled itself into power by faux rage and ill-tempered hysteria, but then not up to the actual business of governing. Thus far we're exceptionally pleased Tony Abbott is on track to fulfil this vision thingy.

And we have every optimistic expectation that the free trade agreement with China will be as useless and as pathetic as the Howard government's free trade agreement with the United States, wherein the Australian negotiators got done like a dinner.

With a little bit of luck, the Liberals will preside over endless alarmist internal squabbles over Chinese businesses seeking to buy (some might call it invest in) Australian infrastructure, especially agriculture and land, and there's a fair chance that an FTA will herald the destruction of US manufacturing of cars in Australia, (currently only managed courtesy of government subsidy), and there will come an end to the weird notion that internationally owned brands such as Vegemite or Arnott's Biscuits or Holden are in any way remotely Australian.

Oh there'll be much agonising, and no one will bother with a cost-benefit analysis, the pet words of the hagiographers when it comes to the NBN, and the pond will just happily frolic and head back to Mind the gap: benefits from free trade haven't quite gone the distance:

Five years on, it is clear the free trade agreement between Australia and the United States was a dud. Despite the fanfare with which the Howard government introduced it, no tangible benefits have resulted for Australia.

Ah well, at least Prof Tiffen will get to do another piece ... on how Abbott fucked up with China ...

The pond has a modest proposal for an opening par for the Prof, with no charge if it comes in handy in a few years time:

Five years on, it is clear the free trade agreement between Australia and China was a dud. Despite the fanfare with which the Hockey government introduced it, no tangible benefits have resulted for Australia, but the Chinese government has made out like a bandit ...

Or some such thing.

But let's be fair. There might be a few positive outcomes. Thanks to the Liberals, Barners and his rural mates might have to learn to drive Chinese utes ... go away Ford ... and if they haven't developed a taste for one minute noodles, cheap at German chain Aldi, now could be the time to start ...

Oh yes, it'll be a tough time for the xenophobes ... now where's that rattan cane ...

(Below: more Nicholson here)