Okay, the pond will admit it. Boris is the new thing.
Sure, the Donald, Moscow Mitch and all the rest of the creatures in the D.C. swamp continue to charm, but Boris knows Latin and so is a superior Molesworth-worthy clown.
The pond has faithfully followed Boris through his rapturous reception in Scotland, his wooing of the Welsh, and his skill at disabling the Fenians and their constant whining.
The pond has faithfully followed Boris through his rapturous reception in Scotland, his wooing of the Welsh, and his skill at disabling the Fenians and their constant whining.
And who better to interpret his charms, his odyssey, his crusade, than the bromancer, best buddy of winners like the onion muncher - oh Lazarus, where are you?
The pond had to make a noble sacrifice to do this … poor nattering "Ned" still shouting at clouds and social media in best reptile style …
Yes, there's nothing like regulation for capitalists, when they can feel their business model going down the tubes …
But relax, it turns out that the bromancer can be as prolix as "Ned", and by golly, Boris knows how to bring out the verbiage in him …how about starting with a quote from Lenin?
Of course it might help to read that quote in context, as can be done here, but never mind, the pond understands that the bromancer is bourgeois and "the slogan of cultural-national autonomy is quite acceptable to the reactionaries and counter-revolutionary bourgeoisie of some nations."
But that was just a stiff aperitif, and it was certainly needed before we plunge deep into the bromancer maelstrom …
But that was just a stiff aperitif, and it was certainly needed before we plunge deep into the bromancer maelstrom …
The EU will not act reasonably and is determined to punish and humiliate Britain?
But didn't the English (not the Scottish et al) say they'd had enough of the krauts and the frogs? How would the bromancer feel if the readership announced they were leaving the lizard Oz?
As for that election result, a harmless trifle, as Rowson here testifies …
And now back to the bromancer, who is only just warming up, like a scribbler with a taste for a hydrogenated Boris ...
Well it's easy enough to bring up fringe abuse and make it stand for everyone on the left, in much the same way as the Donald allows the pond to scribble about the fake news that the bromancer manages to deliver for the lamestream media …
More amusing than the facilitators and enablers is to read musings on the doomster and gloomster hater, as in Lies and buffoonery: How Boris Johnson's fantasy world casts dark shadows in the Middle East, and Brexit: Boris Johnson faces Supreme Court bid to make him stand trial over campaign 'lies', or Boris Johnson news: PM faces fresh court action over Brexit 'lies', amid more jours on UK tour as Irish leaders unite against him.
How do you defend a consistent, proven liar? A man who was in fact sacked for lying more than once …
Well in the world of the reptiles and the bromancer, being a proven liar is almost a badge of honour ...
Yes, indeed, the whole world sings for joy at the Donald's trade wars, his support for Saudi Arabia - can't have enough nukes in the middle east - and his devotion to the planet, thanks to his incredible awareness of climate science …and there's nothing like a dose of racism to unite a divided country …
Sheesh, typical of the narcissist, self-regarding Donald to somehow sneak into the story … please, more Boris ...
Indeed, indeed. Memo to self. Must remember that Israel is not the home of identity politics, that Folau is a persecuted fundie without an identity, and talk of Joe Sixpack isn't the jibber jabber from a sneering member of the elite locked in a remote bunker in Surry Hills …
Well the pond has to throw in a cartoon every so often because this is a long haul, replete with any number of over-familiar reptile talking points … what's the bet that the bromancer will resort to that simplistic nonsense about anywheres and somewheres?
Indeed, indeed …
Well at last it's the final gobbet, and the bromancer has done a fine job denouncing liberalism and all that being tolerant nonsense, even though toleration was supposedly one of the few virtues on display in Boris's Eton elite world …
Yes, it's nothing to do with the reptiles or the right, these culture wars. Why, all the reptiles want is peace and harmony and moderation, and if you don't like that, why don't you just fuck off back to wherever you came from …
No, the pond is not fucking off back to Tamworth, but how good it is to see civilised values at work in the world …
And now the time seems right to switch tracks, and devote a little space to sweet Caroline …touching the Donald, touching me, touching you …
Anybody who thinks the Donald has largely honoured his election promises is, without doubt, completely clueless, delusional, or a hopeless optimist …
Mike Pence had a home? The pond thought that lap dogs just hung around with their master …
Now are we going to suffer more blather about the lap dog, Mother and his home, perhaps as another indicator of the Donald's singular electability?
How did that happen? How could a reptile ask such a silly question?
But do go on, lover of the Donald loving Vlad the impaler, the Saudis, the North Koreans, and anyone else with dictatorial or authoritarian tendencies ...
Indeed, indeed, he can be racist, insulting, demeaning, outrageous, while at the same time acting like a Mafia boss, and it just makes the reptiles adore him all the more … but then they've always had a taste for authoritarians, despots and strong men, which is why they fawn the moment that Chairman Rupert hovers into view …
In fact, the Donald is such a liar and a tool that the reptiles see this as a way of driving subscriptions to lamestream media delivering fake news ...
Well, can you see him vacating his house?
Say what? Is that some sort of threat? Is he going to refuse to leave? Will he call the election a coup, and demand the armed forces offer loyalty to him? Perhaps it's better he get re-elected, so that he can comprehensively trash the US and the planet, while reptiles of the sweet Caroline kind cheer him on.
Who knows, but what fun it is to see a country disintegrate before our eyes, while the reptiles keep blathering on about it being business as usual …
Well the pond promised a Mammoth comic book for a Sunday meditation full of colourful, quirky characters …
So surely there must be some space for our Henry, though this is probably only devoted herpetologists could bear.
The bromancer, sweet Caroline, and a serve of desiccated coconut for desert?
It's too much, it's an after-dinner mint too far, but the pond must go there …
But on the pond pressed, determined to be uplifted to dizzying heights … apparently if you sniff desiccated coconut, the high goes straight to the brain ...
Indeed, indeed, already the country is getting better and better in every way …
Hopefully, this is the first step to making Britain great again, and, it goes without saying, the pond now returns, with extraordinary resilience, to our Henry ...
What's this history lesson, superficial, and, it has to be said, a tad shallow, got to do with the Tories lifting the country back to dizzying heights, a process hopefully underway right at this minute?
Indeed, indeed, there will be a golden age, come again, the pond is sure of it, and all these arguments about the big and small end of the egg will seem like idle amusements …
Here.
You see, there's nothing like an Eton twit to distinguish himself from Tory grandees …history shows Henry, and Boris, the way ...
Good old Enoch Powell and the rivers of blood. Now there's a capper the pond finds hard to match …
As for Boris and the snake pit? Why, it's turbo-charged, as here …
The Bromancer: "...the three key Western allies - the US, Britain and Australia - all have conservative governments. As do many other democracies."
ReplyDeleteOh yes, indeed (Australia is a "key Western ally" ?), and every single one of those "conservative governments" is quite a way further to the "Left" than any conservative government was 100, or even 50, years ago. And every single one of them has significant 'social security' programs which they simply cannot disavow, even if some might be "unfunded empathy" as the pentecostal Christians describe them.
And then: "Nationalism ... can go wrong if it becomes unreasoning hostility to anyone outside the national group."
But then, as we know, it isn't actually "nationalism", it's misoxeny, and that has already overtaken both the US and the UK - with a great deal of help from such as BloJo, BOC.
Ah but, DP, a Sunday of the Bromancer, Caroline and the Gas man; almost as good as the Sundays full of cannibal Catholics and angry Anglicans we used to enjoy !
And a fine historical exposition by the Gas man, though obviously lacking the refined erudition of a Polonius. But perhaps somebody - Polonius maybe - could point out the history of suffrage in Britain. Like the simple fact that women didn't have a vote at all until 1918 and indeed not full suffrage until 1928. And men too were somewhat restricted; even though the vote was extended to "urban working men who met the property qualification" in 1867 and the "secret ballot" was finally introduced in 1872, it wasn't until 1884 - 10 years after Dissy Dizzy's election - that the "imbalance between men's votes in boroughs and counties" was "addressed".
https://www.parliament.uk/about/living-heritage/transformingsociety/electionsvoting/chartists/keydates/
So we might like to ask the Gassy one to tell us just exactly who it was that elected Disraeli.
Hi Dorothy,
ReplyDeleteIn his ode to “moderate assertive nationalism” Sheridan fails to point out or more likely fails to understand that in the now oxymoronic “United Kingdom” there are actually four nations (hint, there’s a clue in the flag).
In England it has long been the practice to consider the terms “English” and “British” as virtually interchangeable. In Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland however the two terms are distinctly different.
In Scotland their version of “moderate assertive nationalism” is driving a pro independence movement that was only narrowly defeated in the 2014 referendum. The Scots later also voted overwhelmingly in favour of remaining in the EU (62%). The outcome of a hard Brexit would almost certainly drive a further push for Scottish Independence remaining integrated within the EU.
Since the Good Friday Agreement was signed in 1998, Northern Ireland has reaped the economic benefit of a cessation to hostilities as well as the free and open trade across the border with the Republic. These gains would be threatened by a hard Brexit. Again the Northern Irish were in favour of remaining in the EU (56%) and could well decide that they would be better off as part of a United Ireland. However this may also reignite sectarian tensions.
The Welsh voted to leave the EU (52.5%) in what might be a case of myopic self harm as “Wales currently receives around £680 million per year in EU funding, considerably more per person than any of the devolved nations and English regions” (National Assembly for Wales). A predominately English controlled Parliament may not be very forthcoming in making up the shortfall after a hard Brexit.
So Nationalism, moderate or otherwise may see the final collapse of the English empire and leave Little England to its own devices.
DiddyWrote
Yes but, butt, DW, "myopic self-harm" is a guiding principle amongst the inhabitants of those islands.
DeleteBut I am entertained by the thought that those who claim 'Angle-land' (never mind the Saxons and the Jutes) should also be claiming to be Britons whom they mostly shoved off into Brittany quite a long time ago.
What the hell is "moderate assertive nationalism"? Is it an authoritarian regime before the internment camps?
DeleteSorry, forgot about the Australian detention policy.
I have trouble seeing appeals to nationalism or patriotism as anything other than just another form of identity politics. The tribe is just very large and the grievances are just very petty or sometimes purely imaginary. It's the sort of bottom-trawling politicians resort to when they have no real platform to offer to the voters.
We would be here all day if we wanted to pick through the errors and misrepresentations in Sheridan's waffle, but, to pick on just one, "all three nations voters are motivated in part by values". Fears and prejudices are not values. This whole line of argument is just a facade erected around some pretty shameful attitudes.
It will be interesting to see what happens to Little England. I wonder who will be putting their hand up to say "I caused this".
It's The Sun wot won it !
Delete