The dawning of the age of the archive has seen the pond drift into irrelevance.
Where once the pond offered utterly unique opportunities for reptile studies, suitable for the most distinguished gentleperson, now any oafish member of the lumpenproletariat can grab a url, head off to the archive, and indulge in studies without any need to enrol in the pond's academy.
Who knows how long this coarse, common, vulgar, unseemly world might last?
Who knows if the pond can summon up the strength to continue in these jaded times?
What on earth do the reptiles make of this barbaric invasion of the sacred temple?
Who knows, but the lead story early this day took on an extra edge of desperation.
Look at what was top of the page...
Labor rejects big tech’s AI copyright swindle
Labor has stared down tech giants’ push to freely use Australian creative content for AI training, helping to protect the future of local artists, writers and journalists.
By James Madden and Thomas Henry
Suddenly the big, brave reptiles are cowering under the government's skirts?
Then came ...
Australian retail chiefs have warned Chinese e-commerce giants are destroying local businesses while flooding the country with disposable products destined for landfill.
By Eli Greenblat
What a howl of pain and what a way to draw attention to shopping opportunities ...
She sees it at her work where she is the boss of home furnishings chain Adairs. She argues that her product designs are ripped off, undercut and sold on these sites. At home she sees her children enjoying ordering from the likes of Temu or Shein, with fast-fashion and throwaway items piling up, only to quickly end up in landfill along with the millions of other garments and household gadgets ordered by Australians every year.
“I don’t think you’re ever going to get people to stop buying from Temu or Shein,” Ms Roseby says.
“But you can actually look at what they’re doing to our country, look at what they’re doing to the recycling, look at what they’re doing to waste, look at what they’re doing to landfill, and actually be goddamn responsible for it.
“We employ around 1600 people across Australia and New Zealand. We pay tax, we also invest in design, we invest in an anti-modern slavery supply line, and that all comes at a cost. It is a new moral playing field here. They operate cost models we can’t compete with, we can’t replicate it and nor would we want to.”
But even more desperate was this offering ...
‘Greatest Australian drama of the 21st century’: Here are your top 25 TV shows
From foul-mouthed fixers to impossibly upbeat coaches, The Australian readers’ picks for the best TV shows since 2001.
by Culture Team
And then in a discussion of "Greatest Australian drama", the talk was of True Detective and The Sopranos, and Slow Horses, which was the winner (though Mr. Inbetween, for which the pond has great fondness, did briefly intrude).
Dear sweet long absent lord, the reptiles now have a culture team?
Suddenly they're taking an interest in kultur? And inviting others to join their kultur studies?
Love culture? Sign up to our free newsletter for all the essential shows, compelling books, must-see films, and live performances that you need to know about here.
Nah, sorry, the pond has been following Slow Horses as the latest iteration drops, and if that's all there is, then great Australian drama is doomed to Gary Oldham offering a triple pork feast, and it's past time to retreat to a Platonic cave and stare at the wall ...
Over on the extreme far right, what a dissheveled, disappointing set of reptilian loons presented themselves for inspection ...
Caroline took up the 'terrified of bots' lament (though the pond's hits have never been better thanks to the bots) ...
Big tech wanted all of the nation’s books, songs, poems, film, TV shows and podcasts, to feed into their AI machines, so they could learn to think like human beings. They wanted it all without asking. Without paying. Without limit.
By Caroline Overington
Literary Editor
Phew, lucky the lizard Oz is a wholly foreign corporation ... let the bots have at dinkum Oz shows like Slow Horses and True Detective as they like
Ben was also to hand, packing it in his usual way ...
It’s a low-stakes summit season for Anthony Albanese; not so for Donald Trump.
By Ben Packham
Foreign affairs and defence correspondent
Where's the careening Caterist? Where's Lord Downer?
Where's the pond's regular Monday fixes?
And why had they buried Satan's helper below the fold, at least early in the morning?
The LNP has been promoting SMRs as ‘the next big thing’ in nuclear energy for the better part of 40 years. Four decades on, nothing has changed.
By Chris Bowen
Oh come now, the few remaining members of the pond's academy are above spending time with carping Chris, as if his presence suggested some kind of unseemly balance in the hive mind ...
In 1989, of course, renewable energy was vanishingly small in the global energy mix. Nuclear energy was responsible for 17 per cent of the world’s generation.
Now, renewable energy is responsible for more electricity generation than coal, and nuclear power has fallen to 9 per cent of the world’s generation.
Renewable generation already far surpasses nuclear generation and, over the course of the next 12 months, wind and solar will separately surpass nuclear generation in importance. To hear LNP spokespeople and others boosting the nuclear renaissance, you’d think that the number of countries with nuclear in the mix is growing. It isn’t. In 2025, the number of economies that include nuclear generation in their system has fallen by one, with Taiwan having closed the last of its nuclear power stations.
And when it comes to SMRs the story is also not encouraging. According to the World Nuclear Association there are two in operation in the world: one in China, one in Russia. None operates commercially in comparable countries to Australia.
Argentina did start construction of an SMR in 2014. In 2024, construction was halted, work incomplete, with the head of Argentina’s National Atomic Energy Commission saying: “This reactor is not economically competitive.”
Even in China, which is building some large nuclear reactors, their role pales into insignificance compared to renewables. The importance of nuclear in the overall Chinese energy mix is falling as China’s massive renewable rollout leaves nuclear in its wake.
The reptiles might think that some kind of novel discussion starter, but the pond was appalled that this sort of heresy should be allowed to strut and preen within the temple ... as if regurgitating familiar pond talking points was some kind of something new ...
What was left? Nothing much, nothing for the few remaining members of the pond's academy to sink their teeth into and tear off a chunk ...
All the pond could summon up was a chance yet again to assess the chances of the lettuce up against Susssan, with the help of simplistic Simon, doing his best to give the lettuce and edge and protect the pond's bet ...
The header: Sussan Ley’s fate tied to net zero, migration settlement, Opposition to the implied carbon tax within ‘Labor’s net-zero target’, alongside a Coalition pledge to establish its own targets once in government, might offer a narrow pathway toward some sort of consensus.
The caption for the snap of Sussssan staring down the lettuce, putting the pond's huge plunge on the salad staple in peril: Climate change and immigration are now directly linked to not only the longevity of Sussan Ley’s leadership, but the party itself. Picture: NewsWire / Flavio Brancaleone
It took a full five minutes of photo-lumbered contemplation for simpleton Simon to produce net zero useful insights ...
Any confidence that she can survive until the next election – let alone more than 12 months in the job – now rests on an enduring settlement being reached on these two outstanding issues, as a minimum, and getting them done this side of Christmas.
The more her supporters try to box her in to a net-zero commitment, the more Ley risks becoming detached from the direction in which the party she leads appears to be heading.
Promises, promises, as the reptiles interrupted with the first snap, The intervention by South Australian senator Andrew McLachlan signifies a split within Sussan Ley’s own support base. Picture: NCA NewsWire / Martin Ollman
Simpleton Simon purported to do a bowels inspection ...
It’s little surprise some colleagues are drawing parallels with the troubles of 2007-08 when Brendan Nelson, having taken over from John Howard, was stalked almost immediately by Malcolm Turnbull only to have the party room dump Turnbull and turn to Tony Abbott, all within 12 months.
Cognisant of this history, Ley is said to be getting anxious about getting it done soon. But she also has to get it right.
Considering how long and how far this has been allowed to drift, it’s difficult to see how a consensus can now be achieved, particularly if last week’s antics – and what is likely to come this week – are any guide. There is no easy fix. Not only is there division between the conservative and moderate wings of the party room, there is now division within divisions, on both sides.
Ley’s leadership is buttressed by the two NSW confederacies. The (Michael) Photios group and the (Alex) Hawke group. Hawke likes to call his grouping a centre-right faction, yet its record might suggest otherwise if one looks at its tradition of voting with the moderates, whether it be the old guard or new guard, and depending on what issue.
Then came more snaps, as already the pond sensed a snap overload, Michael Photios leads the moderate faction; Alex Hawke likes to call his grouping a centre-right faction.
Simplistic Simon sensed impending chaos ...
South Australian senator Andrew McLachlan, whom few voters would have heard of, is variously described as being a moderate aligned to Photios but has also been lumped in with Hawke. Whoever used him at the weekend as a proxy to warn on the front page of this newspaper that the party had lost its way on climate change and should stick with Labor’s net zero policy is irrelevant.
Either way, the intervention signifies a split within Ley’s own support base when contrasted with Lindsay MP Melissa McIntosh, who went rogue the day after having polled her own western Sydney community and declared she was for dumping the policy. Both groups would like to claim McIntosh is in their camp.
Having promised in June to keep things under control with a process-led approach to policy development, Ley now finds things have gone the other way and are rapidly getting out of control.
Dan the man intruded, Opposition energy spokesman Dan Tehan on call to ‘divine the magic formula’. Picture: NewsWire / Martin Ollman
Good old Dan, but wasn't this mob just executing News Corp policy? Didn't Dan the man just heed his duty and recycle reptile talking points?
Simpleton Simon sounded simply clueless ...
Politics hates a vacuum and while Ley waits for her energy spokesman Dan Tehan, to divine the magic formula, dissidents have been filling the space. So much so that for many there can be no walking back from what are now entrenched positions of either support or opposition to net zero.
There is, however, a narrow pathway forward if Ley has the ability and conviction to pursue what appears to be the only solution both fringes could probably live with, even if they don’t like it. This would involve establishing a foundational principle and a strategic position that would seek to replicate Tony Abbott’s dismantling of Julia Gillard’s carbon tax.
Most would agree that ditching all climate targets would present an unacceptable risk for the Coalition, exposing it to accusations of climate denialism.
But having already opposed Labor’s 2035 targets on the basis of economics, this same approach could be applied to the longer-term 2050 target if it’s framed as “Labor’s net-zero target”.
The basis for this lies in Labor’s own modelling that shows the 2035 emissions reduction target relies on an implied carbon tax of around $100 a tonne. By 2050, this is projected to be around $300 a tonne.
Time for another rogue, Melissa McIntosh went rogue and declared she was for dumping the net zero policy. Picture: NewsWire / Martin Ollman
The pond began to get a sense that something was terribly wrong with simplistic Simon's analysis, all the more so when Tony Bleagh suddenly intruded on the conversation ...
Blair said voters “feel they’re being asked to make financial sacrifices and changes in lifestyle when they know the impact on global emissions is minimal”. This was a strategy, he said, that was “doomed to fail”.
The only accommodation available to Ley, which allows for the type of flexibility Blair suggests, would be to establish a position that opposes “Labor’s net-zero target” alongside a pledge that the Coalition would establish its own targets once in government. This would be based on the principle that it would not involve an economy-wrecking carbon tax.
Is there a new Iraq war he can stuff up?
Well there's always Gaza, as simpleton Simon drifted back in time to a bizarre conjunction ... In a 2010 election-eve interview, Gillard told The Australian: ‘I rule out a carbon tax.’ Tony Abbott made a promise to repeal the carbon tax, which he achieved in 2014.
That's it, that's the best this simpleton has got?
We're in 2025 and the reptiles are stuck back in 2010?
And thus far there hasn't been a single mention of the reptile-approved heroes offering an exciting way forward?
Might simplistic Simon seize the chance to mention the real trend-setters in his final gobbet?
And there is no sign of a resolution on this issue either. As much as some in the Coalition might want to wish this one away, the immigration debate is only likely to intensify in the outer suburbs.
In the end, unless the Coalition can get back to campaigning on the economy, it has no prospect of becoming politically competitive again. And there is no prospect of getting back on to the economy – despite Ley’s efforts through two sound economic speeches – until the climate change and immigration issues are resolved.
It is these two vexations that are now directly linked to not only the longevity of Ley’s leadership but the party itself. The answer to this may ultimately come down to whether the two can simultaneously survive.
"Who knows how long this coarse, common, vulgar, unseemly world might last?"
ReplyDeleteWell one thing we can be assured of is that it will last as long as homo saps saps lasts, and not a moment longer.