In which the bromancer and nattering "Ned" brighten up a meditative Sunday ...

Yes, Polonius has scribbled, yes this week saw dashing Donners dashing out and about, and yet … what better way to wake up to a Sunday meditation than with a serve of bromancer, garnished with his usual taste for the absurd ...

The time has come,' the Bromancer said, 
 To talk of many things: 
Of shoes — and ships — and sealing-wax — 
 Of cabbages — and kings — 
And why the sea isn't boiling hot — 
 And whether Anderson's cattle have wings.'

What pleases the pond is that, in a rag dedicated to activism and emotional outbursts (all the reptiles are frayed, and nervous, besieged by Gramsci's long march and wretches who refuse to embrace fundamentalism and bigotry),  the bromancer should promote himself as the voice of science and reason  ...

Of course you could look at it another way. Murdochian activists never level with people, and go careening on, wildly spending words as the mood suits, which might put the world in a precarious position, which in turn would mean drastically reduced living standards.

So when inevitably climate inaction explicitly reduces living standards, wrecks reefs, worsens climate events, jacks up insurance to horrendous levels, the reptiles are gratified, and pleased to see their work done, their mission achieved…

I met a bromancer from an antique rag, 

Who said—“Two vast and trunkless legs of stone 

Stand in the desert. . . . Near them, on the sand, 

Half sunk a shattered visage lies, whose frown, 

And wrinkled lip, and sneer of cold command, 

Tell that its sculptor well those passions read 

Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things, 

The hand that mocked them, and the heart that fed; 

And on the pedestal, these words appear: 

My name is Chairman Rupert, King of Kings; 

Look on my minions' climate denialism, ye Mighty, and despair! 

Nothing beside remains. Round the decay 

Of that colossal Wreck, boundless and bare 

The lone and level sands stretch far away.”

But enough of old favourites, let's not get in the way of the paranoid bromancer ...

Corey isn't/wasn't an extremist? Why he pushed his body to the limit …

 

… talk about cut, talk about buff. And he knew how to cut and buff and burn climate science …

When Bernardi launched his Conservative Leadership Foundation (CLF) in 2009, one of the first action items of the groups the CLF helped to establish was to go after policies that put a price on greenhouse gas emissions. Bernardi’s inspiration for forming the CLF, at least in part, came from a reported trip to the Leadership Institute in the US a year or two earlier. The Leadership Institute trains young people to be conservative activists and “freedom fighters” that will go out into the world to “defeat the radical left.” The CLF helped to fund and establish a network of conservative websites, including stopgillardscarbontax.com, which had another US-based global warming sceptic, the Cato Institute’s Patrick Michaels, as a science adviser. Bernardi himself has spoken twice at climate conferences organised by the US climate science denial group the Heartland Institute – once in Chicago in May 2010 and then again in Sydney in October that same year. Each time, Heartland paid Bernardi’s expenses. (Graudian for links and more)

And so on and on, because this extremist was too extreme even for the hard right extremists in the Liberal party, the mutton Duttons determined to drive out the wets.

Sad to say, Corey was a fundamentalist loon in about every way imaginable, and hooked up with a bunch of Xian fundamentalist loons as his final ploy, before drifting into complete irrelevance.

So who else have we got? Please, dear long absent lord, don't let it be prattling Polonius. Oh no, it is, it is ...

There is nothing remotely equivalent to Jeremy Corbyn?

More Graudian here, more Rowe here ...

What the pond loves most about the bromancer is the way his irrational activism and Wuthering Heights emotionalism always leads him into the land of the cartoon figure … and could there be a better cartoon than John Anderson?

You see, Anderson is one of those closet climate science denialists who purport to accept the science, but then do everything they can to subvert anyone doing anything about it, which makes him a much-loved reptile favourite …

He's in the school of "but, billy goat butt" …

“I’m not a climate change denier but …"

Go on billy goat, butt away ...

"… but I would be very wary about using this as a political device,” he said. 

 The deputy prime minister and Nationals leader, Michael McCormack, also said: “I’m a believer that the climate is always changing and it’s been changing since Moses was a boy.” 

Verity Morgan-Schmidt is from a multigeneration farming family in Western Australia and is CEO of Farmers for Climate Action. She said the comments were “a disservice to many of our farmers who are already facing the reality of climate change”. “My family has been on properties out in Western Australia for over 100 years. We can say this has well and truly moved beyond natural cyclical patterns,” she said. 

 “The idea that we could be accused of playing politics by accepting reality is a bitter pill to swallow. The science is clear. Climate change is increasing the severity of extreme weather events that include drought. 

 “The vast majority of farmers and National party voters that we speak to are growing increasingly frustrated at the lack of action on climate change at a federal level.”

That was back in June 2018, Graudian here, but the bromancer is still playing the Andersonian billy goat butt game ...

Oh fucketty fuck, not all that Western civilisation crap again, and inane, stupid, rhetorical questions of the "should we stop feeding the world?" kind.

And so on to a final gobbet of inanity ...

And there you have it. All that talk of emotions rather than facts, and reasoned insights, and the bromancer manages to reduce the American revolution to a half-baked piece of conservative piety, and the French revolution to a simplistic six words.

You can't get much more fuckwitted than that. It might pass the Fox News chyron test, Donald Trump might even recyle it in a loon tweet, but why does the bromancer work so hard at showing why he and the other reptiles keep getting held in ever greater contempt?

Well it's time to pause before the usual great challenge …and we're not talking ...

The pond is talking of making it through a nattering "Ned" column, the Everest of hand-wringing, moaning and sighing …

Just the header made the pond's head slump on shoulders. All the pond could do was suggest stray, innocent, unaware readers pack a lunch, carry plenty of fluids, and enjoy the cartoons the pond ha sprinkled along the way …like raisins in a very glum, dull plum pudding ...

It will be noted that these cartoons bear absolutely no connection to the tedious scribblings of an aged lizard Oz loon, but imagine how terrible it would be if there was some connection …

Okay, there's an excuse to run with an infallible Pope …

Now it's back to the anxiety attacks and the hand-wringing

Yes, it's getting harder to trust government, and the pond doesn't have a clue why …

And some of the shellfish are beginning to ask awkward questions ...

But let's not have any talk about that sort of stuff, let's see how "Ned's" anxiety attack might be going down with the reptiles' aged readership:

Of course it had absolutely nothing to do with the people who have been kept in indefinite detention for no reason or purpose for soul-destroying years … but we know about that kind of human caring …

It's the sort of policy triumph that comes from moral giants ...

And so back to "Ned" nattering away ...

Ah, that it'd be the same progressive ideology and article of faith that promotes all that climate alarmist nonsense … when the real solution to it all is some old fashioned-religion, freedom of speech, and an end to people feeling threatened …

And so to a moan about education, which coming from a reptile mob that denies a whole branch of science, is reasonably rich ...

Well it could be worse …

… but let's not have any talk about procrastination, because it's time for congratulations to any stray, innocent reader who has made it this far. You have reached the final "Ned" gobbet of unhappiness and despair ...

Shane Stone to lead the response and recovery?

Well that must mean we can all spend our happy days playing skipping stones …

Perhaps we should look abroad for help and wisdom, if it turns out that throwing Stones only manages to break a few windows…

Never mind, Xmas is coming, and what joys that will bring …