Sunday, November 11, 2018

In which the pond meditates this Sunday with Dame Slap and the dog botherer ...


What better way to meditate on a Sunday, than join with Dame Slap in contemplating the urgent need to save white western civilisation, to redeem white nationalism, to celebrate all the best that noble Anglo-Saxons have given unto the world …

Remember there are good volk on both sides, and you might not see a 'k' in the words 'alt right', but that shouldn't diminish the pride in a proper use of a bunk of kkk'ers ...

Yes, it's back to talk of the crusades, a job that's never been finished since the pond first read Sir Stephen Runciman recording noble deeds …

The massacre at Jerusalem profoundly impressed all the world. No one can say how many victims it involved; but it emptied Jerusalem of its Moslem and Jewish inhabitants. Many even of the Christians were horrified by what had been done; and amongst the Moslems, who had been ready hitherto to accept the Franks as another factor in the tangled politics of the time, there was henceforward a clear determination that the Franks must be driven out. It was this bloodthirsty proof of Christian fanaticism that recreated the fanaticism of Islam. When, later, wiser Latins in the East sought to find some basis on which Christian and Moslem could work together, the memory of the massacre stood always in their way. (found here - don't worry, academics don't know how to get their certificates together).

Ah noble western civilisation, full of glorious deeds, and so to Dame Slap ...


Say what? They're still talking of Sydney University as the new home for Western Civilisation?

Did these varlets not heed the reptiles' very own meritorious Merritt furiously scribbling not so long ago, and carefully curated by the pond for just such a dire emergency? Please allow the pond to break the glass, and stand well clear ...



Why Sydney University is no home for western enlightenment, it is no place for Western Civilisation, it is little better than David Elliott showing how to treat the wishes of a woman under parliamentary privilege … and escaping any consequences …

Ah, but wait, talking without the involvement or consent of a woman is what any right-thinking Liberal or Senator Erica might do …

But enough of irony, because Dame Slap is good at irony herself ...



Actually it's probably being championed by fools who don MAGA caps and dance out in the streets of New York at night, heedless of anything that might follow, even in the cartoons …


Phew, it's always good to slip in a cartoon when Dame Slap gets going on the glories of Western Civilisation, including but not limited to the glories of the Donald ...



Indeed, indeed, the pond is wildly enthusiastic that white Western Civilisation will be treasured at the monstrous University of Sydney, ruiner of the meritorious Merritt's heart …

Why, with Dame Slap onside, all will end well, and the future of Western Civilisation will be assured, and we can all don our MAGA caps and dance out on the streets of New York at night, knowing the real villains will be cut off at the pass …


Strange all that talk on Fox about the caravan disappeared the day after the election.

And so to a final gobbet ...



Grew ashamed of war?

By golly, it must be good to live in Dame Slap's alternative universe …when the pond last checked and did a Greg Hunt, the wiki was listing the war in Afghanistan as 2001-present

Ashamed of war? Could the pond just quickly recycle that Pope from yesterday?


What are all those weapons being built and sold for? So they can rust in the tropical sun?

Defeat totalitarianism? The pond could feel another MAGA cap cartoon coming on ...



And so to the pond's Sunday bonus ...



The pond makes no excuse … the dog botherer is a specialist taste, and those who have already pigged out on Dame Slap need travel no further … but for those with gumption and proper Anglo-Saxon grit and a taste for the very best of Western Civilisation - perhaps a civilising adventurous war in Iraq - what rewards there will be ...



Now the pond can sense a little disappointment thus far … the dog botherer is trying one of his famous attempts at balance - as Dr Johnson sort of said, it's remarkable it's attempted at all - and though it's pitiful, it's not really amusing or up to dog botherer par … but trust the pond, things will get better in the bye and bye, and there might even be some pie in the sky...



Okay, now please, trumpet roll, because here's the dog botherer at his finest ...



Yep, thar she blows … crucially, according to the minor war criminal dog botherer, the onion muncher understands the middle ground of national politics … which no doubt helps explain his extraordinary success as national leader, and his reign as PM, which some think almost matched Ming the Merciless's eternal rule (blessed as they are by having a complete blank about Australian history) …

But wait, there's more. For many months now, the pond has kept the onion muncher in its masthead, because it has every hope, and there is every prospect, that this phoenix will rise from the ashes, and onion munching and knighthoods will once again become fashionable throughout the land ...



Be still beating heart, those who want even more excitement can rush off to the Graudian here … while the pond turns back to another good oil gobbet from the dog botherer ...



Nota bene how the dog botherer carefully positions the onion muncher as a centrist, in the middle of the mainstream …while doing his very best to whip up a lather and a storm about the taxi driver arm driver ...

But while he's mainly blathering about Latham, see how the dog botherer cunningly slips in idle chatter about those alarming leftist policies that have paved the way for a return of the onion muncher. 

Get out the palms, get out the ass, it's going to be a new Palm Sunday ...



Yes, as well as the bizarre Bosi, more at the Graudian link above, one of the key disciples of the onion muncher is the rogue Kelly, a man who spent years as a furniture salesman learning all there is to know about climate science ...



Gluttons for punishment will head off to the Graudian here for the rest of that story - it has a peachy photo of the onion muncher and the rogue Kelly at its head - but the pond is content to turn to a last gobbet of dog bothering, knowing that the minor war criminal has again delivered unto the world his best shots …

But first a message from his sponsor …or is that his idol?


  

Ah the glories of Western Civilisation …why, we've put war behind us ...



And there you have the best irony of all. A tabloid television wannabe personality carrying on about egomaniacs and fundamentalists of various kinds, while peddling climate science denialism, assorted other fundamentalisms, and with credentials as a minor war criminal that makes 'roo poo throwing seem like a sensible way to pass a little time - well it makes more sense than paying $700 bucks for six months of cricket watching on Foxtel ...

Yes, keep the parliament full of onion munchers and rogue Kellys, celebrated and cheered on by the reptiles, so that sanity and climate science and a wired nation, connected by copper, can flourish …

And if you believe that, you must have been able to read Dame Slap and the dog botherer without a shred of irony or a cynical smile crossing the lips ...

And with that final heartening, cheering thought about the future of Western Civilisation, how lucky was the pond to have held over an extremely relevant Rowe, with much more, and always relevant, Rowe here



And now peace and good cheer to all this Sunday, as angry Sydney Anglicans head off to church with their complimentary women to consign wretched minority groups to eternal hellfire ... because it's just one of the many proud traditions of Western Civilisation that find a home in the lizard Oz ...

8 comments:

  1. So Hanson and Latham will either be the most odious force our politics has seen or a serious mainstream centre-right party.
    A third possibility is they will be the best comedy team since Laurel and Hardy.

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  2. What are all those weapons being built and sold for?
    Well, there are wars to fought and the Australian War Memorial will soon have the capacity to display some of them.

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  3. Jesus Dorothy, there are some very Nasty SAS types infiltrating the Nasty Party.

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    Replies
    1. Yair well, you've got 'Muncher' Abbott, Craig Kelly, Andrew Hastie, Jim Molan and probably Erica Betz bringing up the rear (as is his wont).

      Sure you'd need somebody like Riccardo Bosi to give that lot a touch of life (and what happened to Bernardi ?). I can just imagine it now: a revolutionary takeover of the Lib-Nats by that lot ... can't you ?

      Delete
    2. Yair well, you've got 'Muncher' Abbott, Craig Kelly, Andrew Hastie, Jim Molan and probably EricA betz bringing up the rear (as is his wont).

      Sure you'd need somebody like Riccardo Bosi to give that lot a touch of life (and what happened to Bernardi ?). I can just imagine it now: a revolutionary takeover of the Lib-Nats by that lot ... can't you ?

      Delete
    3. Oh well, the truth can stand some repetition, I guess. But not being a Gogglebuddy, I can't tidy up my own mess.

      Delete
  4. Dame Slap sure is an untrammelled joy, isn't she. I especially loved this bit:

    "For months now, they [the ubiquitous "they"] have turned a debate into a one-sided diktat ... They have spread wild claims, piled high with misrepresentation and misinformation."

    No doubt about it, the Albrechtsens of this world are totally disturbed when they convince themselves that their own tactics are being used against them.

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  5. All time favourite botherer phrase "as I advised in my column of..."

    Yes, sans any form of visible irony, the man who "advised" Turnbull through Godwin Grech affair, man who "advised" Tony Abbott through his yugely successful PM role, and who advised Dolly Downer through the war crimes in Iraq - needs to be paid attention to.

    You couldn't make this up.

    Woof woof.

    ReplyDelete

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