Dear sweet long absent lord, as if the times weren't hard enough, what with some readers heading off to Quadrant, and perhaps the Speccie mob and reviving the ghost of Flinty, aargh, me hearties …
Well, today, to try to measure up and match off with the competition to be the weirdest ratbags of all, the reptiles have been off raiding the family mausoleum, and proudly returned with the stuffed corpse of complete irrelevance …
Now is a good time? No, now is not a good time, you irrelevant squawking goose ...
Well, today, to try to measure up and match off with the competition to be the weirdest ratbags of all, the reptiles have been off raiding the family mausoleum, and proudly returned with the stuffed corpse of complete irrelevance …
Now is a good time? No, now is not a good time, you irrelevant squawking goose ...
The pond has dim memories of this tedious old irrelevant fart being just as odious when younger, but if he'd like to go off and get a dose of the virus, the pond is pleased to cheer him on. Just make sure it's a good, hearty dose, so he can experience a pleasantly agonising death, in the dinkum way …
What else? Well in this alleged in depth revelation about the nature of being Australian, the reptiles graced the story with this illustration …
Now they loaded up next to that ancient and hoary delusion, a flock of internal reptile links, suggesting that they'd really only run with the ancient onion mariner and his croc of crap as a way of boosting their hits, using him as click or fish bait for other loads of croc crap.
Naturally the pond made sure it excluded all the links, because encouraging the reptiles is unwise in the best of times … and now is not the best of times, and is certainly not the time to be encouraging the munching of ancient, musty onions …
Comes perspective?
Oh just fuck off you grey-bearded irrelevant loon, your experience is being a failure, and your detachment comes with dealing with failure, and the perspective you offer is of failure, and your pretending to agree with Gillard is the biggest insult of all.
The pond will not be lectured by this man about sexism, misogyny and pretty much everything else … if he wants to know what looks like misogyny and stupidity, he doesn't need a piece in the lizard Oz, he needs a mirror, that's what he needs. Let us not go through this man's repulsive double standards, because that would be to take seriously this irrelevance desperately speaking a place in the sun. This failure to turn a hair, this kind of hypocrisy, must not be tolerated …
By golly, it's got its own wiki listing, so the onion muncher did do something useful in the way of comedy stylings, but the pond might well let out a scream of pain if the reptiles feature the onion muncher standing next to a fire truck yet again ...
The 'talking class' is growing, and yet the whole thing is a promotion for the onion muncher 'in conversation' with Gina's mob.
He was always a dumb fuck, always jabbering on, always talking, always loving the sound of his own voice, but it doesn't get much dumber than this. Why doesn't he just get on his bicycle and do some 'doing', like fuck off already …
People are in deep pain here, and he wants to talk about the talking class because that's what the talking class do, talk the talk and talk the walk ...
Well the pond apologises for wasting everyone's time, but at least that link to the 'talking class' podcast has been rendered inert by way of a screen cap …
And by further way of excuse, what was the pond to do?
Sure nattering "Ned" was out and about …but he seemed mainly to exist so the reptiles could feature a cartoon ...
There's no need to spend any time with Ned, save to celebrate this impeccable logic at the end of the piece …
Yes, republicans, the fundamental issue is no longer the Queen. The pond and "Ned" might be so bold as to suggest that the fundamental issue is no longer the monarchy.
The fundamental issue can only be found in "Ned's" fundament … and fundamentally, that's a fundamental problem … but sssh, don't mention the Queen, who just happens to embody the monarchy, and all its many virtues, including but not limited to Chuck the weird, Andrew the creepy, and those indolent refugees, who fled to North America to escape the whole bloody mess …
What else? Well the bromancer was out and about, but he was having a fit about 5G and Boris and all that, and having an anxiety attack about Xi blaming Australia …
Apparently he's unaware that the 5G network is actively spreading the virus, because he failed to mention this astonishing revelation by Woody Harrelson, John Cusack, and assorted loons of the Trumpian kind … you known, Covid-19 misinformation: pro-Trump and QAnon Twitter bots found to be worst culprits …
Actually, the Donald himself has been the best source of misinformation, what with it just going away like a miracle, and so the pond was appalled to see the bromancer stepping into this troubled water …
Even that header smacked of heresy … has the bromancer learned nothing in his time with News Corp?
Each time the bromancer steps out on to this dangerous crossroad, he risks heresy ...
Really? That's the best the bromancer can do? What about the glories of Donaldism?
(here)
Does the pond have to provide all its own entertainment? Must the pond endure slings and arrows hurled at the Donald and the US? Luckily the reptile readership was on hand to put the bromancer back on the straight and narrow …
But the bromancer refused to listen, and wended his way on ...
But Fox News, News Corp and the Donald have been performing like champions on a trip to Queensland …
The bromancer is scribbling away, as if he hadn't read the inspirational thoughts of the onion muncher, reassuring us that the pandemic will inevitably pass … perhaps by spring, the pond has heard it will magically disappear in the spring, and only important question is when we can get rid of do gooder regulations and get about the business of living, or perhaps dying …
So simple. Send the 20% off to gulags, perhaps a Melbourne hotel, and all would be well, but would the bromancer listen? Had he done the right reading? Had he followed the Swedes, as the reptiles had done for months, only to recant, with the slow learners in the readership a little late in catching up?
To say the pond was startled is to understate the matter … and so for a bonus, the pond turned to the quieter waters of the savvy Savva for some time in the back waters of the Shire …
Perhaps a little speaking in tongues, a waiting for the rapture, a return to form for the Sharkies …
Whenever the savvy Savva scribbles about Scottie from marketing, the pond gets a whiff of ambivalence.
And so she naturally harks back for an opener to his problematic times at Tourism Australia, where he bungled the Bingle, and provided great amusement to all ...
Intensely irritating, over-compensating, perhaps even a bullshit artist, who believes in the Sharkies in the same way he enjoys a sing song at Hillsong without seriously expecting the rapture to arrive in his lifetime?
Lordy, lordy, she really doesn't much like the man, does she, but she's not finished turning the knife, in the kindest way of all, by offering some modest advice … take a break, piss off, no one really needs you, have you thought about Hawaii?
Indeed, indeed, he needs his time off … because what would the cartoonists do without Scottie from marketing taking a break …
Click on to enlarge if you like, the pond just wanted to remember how the immortal Rowe managed to weave Hawaii into his routines …
It goes without saying that the pond is entirely onside for the need for SloMo to take a break, the longer the better, but was it wise for the kindly and understanding savvy Savva to end with a thinly veiled threat?
He and Josh must provide hope that some semblance of normal life will resume, or else he'd better dust off and recirculate his CV, and show not the slightest interest in the Sharkies?
But didn't the bromancer just scribble "If we don't get it right, the worst is ahead of us. And if we do get it right, life will still be very different for a very long time"?
The pond left the reptiles this morning feeling very confused, and blames it all on the talking class, who loath the talking class, and talk about their loathing all the time, because talking is a kind of doing, and so just keep talking, and the doing will somehow get done.
The monarch isn't the problem for republicans, the republic is, leave the Queen alone, she's just the monarch in monarchism, and we all must just take a hol, and relax, and do nothing, except maybe travel the country (perhaps by sneaking on to a train) and we should prepare for a normal life, except life will still be very different for a very long time, and ...
Oh dear, it's all so confusing. Perhaps the Sharkies will never win, and the rapture won't land by Xmas, and all that talking in onion muncher tongues to the great blue sky was just a waste of time ..
No wonder the pond couldn't understand the Rowe of the day, with more Rowe to puzzle over here …
From the Grauniad article on COVID conspiracy pushers that you link to
ReplyDelete"The researchers found a coordinated effort to promote the conspiracy theory that Covid-19 was a bioweapon engineered by China."
They're not having a slash at our Sharri are they???
Not the Sharri-bot?.....Maybe: others have. And let’s face it, her form and connections have taken her far!
DeleteOld Crikey(2014)
When Andrew met Sharri. Kids say the darndest things. Sharri-bot Markson popped up on The Bolt Report on Sunday to continue the fatuous-wah against Mike Carlton, and was so eager to play to right-wing talking points that she even threw in a detour about “Labor running up a $600 billion debt and why isn’t anyone talking about that?” “Yes,” said the Bolter before leading the Oz‘s media murdochaphone back to the topic at hand, allegedly anti-Semitic cartoons. Or “anti-Semmetic”, as Markson called them, before being corrected by Bolt. Did we hear a sigh pass his lips? The people he has to work with … Guy Rundle.
CA.
Well I don't know about Semmetic, CA, but she is certainly emetic.
DeleteBut where did she get this $600bn figure from ? "The budget papers show that Mr Abbott inherited a $19 billion deficit and net debt of $153 billion when he took office in September 2013."
https://www.abc.net.au/news/2015-03-18/fact-check--australia27s-economic-inheritance/6162670?nw=0
The NewsCorpse system is the bigger the lie, the bigger the promotion apparently.
DeleteI presume your bit of fact checking took mere minutes, proving Shari does not do facts..she just barfs up bullshit.
Being of Jewish heritage you would think she would have a handle on the term Semitic. I think the Jewish music genius Frank Zappa had it sussed regards our Shari! :))
https://youtu.be/8yDarQW7UZc
I was always staggered that she had the nerve to take a Walkley for the Joyce affair when the story had been broken ages before by the Independent Oz......as most of us knew. Glory grabber supreme!
https://independentaustralia.net/politics/politics-display/editorial-excerpt-the-barnaby-joyce-affair--another-case-of-mediafail-except-for-ia,11181
Re. Ry Cooder. That is just a guitar slide....most guitarists use stainless steel ones. Ry is a master in how he delivers a tone no one can emulate. Obviously, choice of guitar is relevant, but his sound is unique which explains why he has appeared on more albums than you and I have had hot dinners. Dave Lindley comes close though. And don’t ask me how YouTube’s view algorithm works..:)) Cheers.
CA.
"the bigger the lie, the bigger the promotion..." - sure seems that way, doesn't it, at least to the 'Big Lie Brigade'. Apropos of which - given about 10 seconds of search - I found this in the Jewish Virtual Library: “If you tell a lie big enough and keep repeating it, people will eventually come to believe it."
Deletehttps://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/joseph-goebbels-on-the-quot-big-lie-quot
Sounds like Trump must have had that political manual read to him too: "That's it: you just tell them and they believe. They just do."
Oh dear, that Frank Zappa is a bit ethnically risque, non ?
But "Glory grabber supreme" is up-noting her a bit, isn't it.
As to the guitar slide, I've seen Segovia and John Williams play live, and been to a few pub nights too, and that's the first guitar slide I've ever seen. Anyway, Kez gave a detailed explanation (below), so I now reckon that's made up for almost all of my lifetime not knowing of their existence.
"No wonder the pond couldn't understand the Rowe of the day..."
ReplyDeleteYou have that problem too, DP ? I don't feel quite so bad now.
But reading the Bromancer today was a puzzle too - why he almost sounded half sensible for once and definitely arrayed against the "killers" (Creighton, Henry the Err gas ? and so forth). Now does this mean he's picked up a clue or three from Katrina Grace, or Savvy Sav sometimes ? Miraculous !
But then nobody can compete with the extraordinary apperceptions of Nullius Neddy, can they ? "...the fundamental issue is no longer the Queen". Brilliant, isn't he.
“The pond will not be lectured by this man about sexism, misogyny and pretty much everything else … if he wants to know what looks like misogyny and stupidity, he doesn't need a piece in the lizard Oz, he needs a mirror, that's what he needs. Let us not go through this man's repulsive double standards, because that would be to take seriously this irrelevance desperately speaking a place in the sun. This failure to turn a hair, this kind of hypocrisy, must not be tolerated …”. Ha ha! You deserve a Wiki entry too Dorothy.
ReplyDeleteThe man is such a doofus and a screamingly obvious fake......I can feel your rage.
Like Cater, always without fail, getting in his two bobs worth of climate denial, Abbott always slips in a reference to the Ramsey Centre for western civilisation somehow.
Seems that the prodigal sons and daughters have this day had a group revelation for the good of Australia.....if we would just shut up, don’t confuse our share portfolios with dead people and not believe everything Scotty from marketing puts on his CV.
That is some CV by the way..... which is not online, so I do wonder where the Savvy one got a copy.
All too much wisdom and devotion for me.
https://youtu.be/HEUIZWyieAk
CA.
Thanks for the Ry Cooder, CA. In this case there have been 1,769,854 views - a record for you :-) Any idea what that glass cylinder on the smallest finger of his left hand is for ? Just curious.
DeleteBut otherwise, in this reinstituted 'Orwellian' age, the only possible response to some is to declare them 'unpersons' and totally ignore them accordingly. The ultimate 'cancel culture'.
Hi GB. I can answer your question regarding the glass cylinder Ry is wearing. It’s commonly called a “slide” and they can also be made from metal, plexiglass, and sometimes ceramics.
DeleteSlide guitar playing, also called “bottleneck style” had its origins in early Delta Blues where bones, bottles, and even knives were used. The object is to get those notes that aren't readily available when you fret a regular guitar (unless you bend the fretted string).
On a standard guitar the frets are positioned using equal tempered tuning which enables all 24 major and minor keys to be played in tune. For instance, one song could be played in the key of G, and the next in the key of E flat minor and both keys would sound acceptably in tune. Before the advent of equal tempered tuning such a shift in keys would sound way out of tune.
The trouble is that equal tempered tuning is a compromise. It produces major third intervals that don’t match the so-called “blues third” which lies somewhere between the major and minor interval. A slide can pinpoint this note because it can be placed anywhere on the string the player wants – it’s basically a movable fret.
There are of course non-Western unfretted instruments that also use sliding notes, albeit without a slide such as the one Ry is wearing. The players just use the fingers of their “fretting” hand. Two fabulous examples are the guqin https://youtu.be/IV4rkOdELrs and the sarod https://youtu.be/aCz4tvuA8iU.
And...for some totally OTT full bottle slide guitar check this out. The cleanup towel staccato effect is brilliant! https://youtu.be/xfBF4rr7FiA
DeleteThanks for your much more informative reply to GB’s question Kez. Your links are great....particularly Danny Gatton. Never seen a towel used before. :-)) Amazing guitarist! OTT is spot on. Cheers.
DeleteCA.
Yes, seconding CA, Kez; thanks very much for that. Just watching the guqin piece and thinking that lady would really need those 'fret fingers' to be nice and toughly calloused, wouldn't she. Though I guess, at least traditionally, the strings would have been a bit softer than maybe more modern 'artificial' ones are. Fascinating seeing a clear closeup of the finger action.
DeleteThe sarod (and double tabla) weren't half bad either. And OTT Gatton was a delight - strange the hobbies some folks develop, isn't it
Awwww - so sad.
ReplyDeletehttps://www.reuters.com/article/us-news-corp-australia-focus/rupert-murdochs-big-investment-headache-australia-idUSKCN24G36B
As I wipe the tears from my eyes......as I am laughing so much, all I can think of is the political damage and deceit this corpuscle of propaganda and corruption has spread across the planet over the last 50 years.
DeletePower sure is a dangerous drug in the wrong hands. Thanks for this tragic news! Cheers.
CA.