Sunday, January 10, 2016

Speaking of puritanism and manly seed and the imaginative Brendan O'Neill, as the pond is always wont to do on a meditative Sunday ...

As the debasing of the word EXCLUSIVE continues apace this mediative Sunday...



Only one rag seemed to realise that an EXCLUSIVE shared around the nation might not be an EXCLUSIVE, unless it was understood to be an EXCLUSIVE to the House of Murdoch ... and so preferred to pun ...


What, no EXCLUSIVE? Such are the meditative days of our lives.

Meanwhile, there being very little joy in watching Joy, the pond has decided that it has formed a set against writer-directors and David O. Russell in particular, and anyone else deluded enough to think that it's possible to make a Citizen Kane about selling miracle mops on an infomercial channel ...

After the joys of Jennifer Lawrence and American Hustle, that it should so quickly and tragically come to this - yes, there's even a Rosebud moment, albeit with paper cut-outs - and then the pond realised what had gone wrong.

It was a Fox production, a House of Murdoch show, albeit from the lesser Fox, and so any attempt at post-reflexive irony about the success of miracle mop sellers at Xmas fell as flat as a pancake or a Chairman Rupert tweet ...

But why, you ask, is the pond turning to cultural matters this meditative Sunday?

Well it's because its campaign to get the Bolter working full time on the ABC is gathering momentum ... with this from a few days ago ...


Now if all you want to take away from that is the link to the Puccini, it's here, but others will note that the Bolter is 'so excited' to be on Mornington community radio, and has the wild aspiration to do a Cargher ...

Now the pond spends much of its time listening to ABC Classic FM, but is willing to make the ultimate sacrifice. 

Give the Bolter a gig on that radio station, and it's the perfect solution. He'll have to shut up and present the music, perhaps with the odd snipe now and then, but in a very muted way to fit the elevated tone ... and instead of being a common brawler for the House of Murdoch, delivering race hatred to the world, he can instead play lots of Wagner ...

Oh okay, this is all by way of evading the pond's duty, which is to present daily a sampled loon from the vast array of loonishness on parade at the House of Murdoch ...

This day the pond couldn't help but notice that Brendan O'Neill had shifted up to the top of the digital page of the lizard Oz, and that poor old Polonius had disappeared. 

Evidently the trolling O'Neill had delivered the click bait hits required for further exposure ...


Now everyone knows that there's no better Marxist or feminist than O'Neill, provided that workers and women know their place, and pay due respect to the Pope, Anglicans, David Cameron, the House of Lords and the British establishment, all long suffering victims of infamous attacks by ratbags and women ...

But frankly the pond only reads O'Neill to discover when George Orwell, Nineteen eighty-four, or 'Orwellian' will be trotted out, like those censers you routinely see featured when child molesters get together to bung on an ad majorem dei gloriam do ...

Well it is a Sunday, so the pond must honour the Pellists before holding nose and plunging for the very last time into yet another gayle of uselessness ....


Oh ay, Brendan, why you're so cute, me bright British lad, so how about a fuck then?

Alternatively, why not go just go and get fucked?

A fucking flirtation tax ... as if getting hit on by entirely useless men in entirely the wrong places at entirely the wrong time should be the burden women must live with for life ...

But the pond understands that readers will be devastated, because there seems to be no sign of Orwell ... a truly sinister outcome for much time and effort wasted getting this far ...

Well please allow the pond to pre-empt Mr O'Neill by noting that there's a much more interesting read at The New Yorker on the question of prohibition, Kelefa Sanneh's Drunk with Power What was Prohibition really about?, which happily, for the moment, is outside the paywall ...

Sensible folk will abandon Mr O'Neill and head off there, perhaps with a morning cocktail in hand, and will have a perfectly good Sunday, and might even end up with sheets scattered all over the place.

Now for those who've already read the Sanneh, the pond supposes we must continue on with Brendan, but it's a painful job, there being not a shred of joy in this joyless task ... except of course, for catching a glimpse of Orwell ...


Now the pond knows what you're thinking. Just the usual blather about the secular priesthood, and the willingness to conflate all sorts of nonsense about a puritanical age, which is code for O'Neill's urgent desire to be able to go on molesting women in the way that men have routinely molested women for centuries ...

Aye, the Daesh is strong in this one ...

Yet there's not a sign of Orwell, and surely this must be an elaborate pond tease or hoax, designed to confirm that O'Neill isn't just mentally unstable and weird, he's self-confessedly sexually unstable, and perhaps, uncertain in his sexuality, is seeking to join the pond's friends in the TG community ...

They must also be astonished that O'Neill is such a fuckwit, he doesn't seem to understand the simple concept of time and place. 

What's the bet when he goes in to an office and stumbles up against a receptionist or secretary and gives the woman's bottom or breasts a jolly good feel up - as the pond's infamous uncle was wont to do - he's bewildered and astonished when the objection of attention isn't pleased by it, and perhaps he's even a little hurt when he's given a knee to the groin, or a slap to the chops, or perhaps a ten thousand dollar fine for being an abject goose ...

Well he can of course head off to live in Italy or perhaps work on a building site where wolf whistling can still be heard because after all, that's what any lad does when confronted by boobs and wants a little articulate sensual banter to advance his cause when seeking a fuck ...

But wait, the pond always plays fair ... and anyone who has lasted this far can enter the House of Orwell triumphant ...


You see, the pond and Brendan O'Neill always delivers ... and that's how you move from a goose making a fool of himself on television and copping a fine to some epic conclusion that the incident shows that the world has gone to puritanical hell in a secularist handbasket ...

Because hysteria - perhaps a form of sexually inspired hysteria, suggesting young Brendan isn't getting enough - is the stock in trade of the O'Neills and Bolters of the world ...

How else to interpret O'Neill's suggestion that all he can do is imagine such things, and suggest to others that their imagination should do the rest?

Clearly O'Neill fails to understand that asking a woman out for a drink on national television and calling her baby and telling her to stop blushing is about the last way on earth you might manage to get your oar wet ...

The pond can imagine O'Neill's own brand of trying it on. You know, inviting a 'lady' up to the loft to look at his collection of Zoo magazines and all the page three girls he pasted into his exercise book ... and then hinting to his pick-up that they should go primate ...

Oh come on ... 

Hopefully, there won't be many desperate souls who've made it this far ... instead they might have just rolled over and indulged in a little canoodling or a wild fuck, and left Orwell's own contorted brand of weirdly hung up sexuality filed on the book shelf for later reference (yes, Orwell had his difficulties with Mary Anns and an obsession with toughness inversely proportional to his actual frailty, as well as a generous amount of misogyny which shows whenever he tried to write a female character ...)

Enough already, even if you do have to wonder at anyone who could imagine that sex has somehow been restrained, reined in, by a "new expert class", a "chattering class", that's cold and severe ... and then all he's able to offer is imagination ...

Well, there's one guaranteed safe way to deal with Brendan O'Neill, and it requires no imagination at all  ...


Only in a metaphorical way of course ... though no doubt if you're an imaginative O'Neill,  exercising your imagination, you might see that image as men wantonly fertilising the kerbing with their manly seed ... and then you went on national television to explain to an interviewer anxious to talk about cricket that you too had some manly seed and didn't mind having a drink to discuss what to do with it ...
In which case the pond is happy to book you into a room next to O'Neill for your therapy ...

20 comments:

  1. O'Neill seems to be saying that the protestors against this practice are themselves in need of a good dose of sexual assault. What a jolly punishment that seems to be. I wonder how Brens would feel about a bit of a jolly good bashing and a jolly good rogering up the clacker, with a lot of blood and a good deal of trauma. All done in the best of humour, understand.

    Might be just the tonic to lift him out of his melancholy, don't you think Dot?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A GP, let’s call her Sue, said: “I’m afraid things are much worse than people suspect.” In recent years, Sue had treated growing numbers of teenage girls with internal injuries caused by frequent anal sex; not, as Sue found out, because she wanted to, or because she enjoyed it – on the contrary – but because a boy expected her to. “I’ll spare you the gruesome details,” said Sue, “but these girls are very young and slight and their bodies are simply not designed for that.”

      ... The end result is what Sue sees in her work as a GP. Young girls – children, really – who abase themselves to pass for normal in a grim, pornified culture. Another study of British teenagers found that most youngsters’ first experience of anal sex occurred within a relationship, but it was “rarely under circumstances of mutual exploration of sexual pleasure”. Instead, it was boys who pushed the girls to try it, with boys reporting that they felt “expected” to take that role.

      Moreover, both genders expected males to find pleasure in the act whereas females were mostly expected to “endure the negative aspects such as pain or a damaged reputation”.

      Their whole sexting culture sends them one crude, insidious message: buggers must be choosers. ...

      I suggest that future sex education classes begin with this joke:

      “I asked my wife to try anal sex. ‘Sure,’ she said: ‘You first.’”

      Delete
  2. I'll tell you something Brendan old son, If you tried that crap on my mother, my wife or my daughter I'd punch the crap out of you, you fucking brain dead simpleton.

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    Replies
    1. So who looks after the girls who are not lucky enough to have a man to protect them from the urges of other non-related men and related men? Apparently there are a lot of real uncles who molest children in the family and fathers who believe they have the right to introduce their daughters to sex. These men rarely are charged because of the damage that publicity does to the child involved.

      Punching out other men is one way patriarchy looks after women and girls; another is to put us in burkas. Patriarchy has not been good enough to ensure freedom for women from badly raised men so far as I can tell and although I had a father and a brother and now have sons; this crap happened to me all my life.

      I never enjoyed the 'compliment' when I was of apparently being so attractive that men can't help themselves but touch me - and it is wonderful to be 'invisible' to that type of men now that I am old.

      I'd never have told male relatives about the crap because that is such a girly thing to do and is only a second best solution to the problem of how women can be free to make our own choices without depending on the decency of men that cannot be ensured in a patriarchal culture.

      Delete
    2. https://witchwind.wordpress.com/2014/10/07/utopia-what-would-a-womens-society-look-like/

      Delete
  3. Jeebus I am sick of middle class, middle aged white dudes telling everyone else what is sexist, bigoted or racist. The sheer arrogance of O'Neil mansplaining to women what is sexist, blacks what is racist and Muslims what is bigoted is breath taking but yet so typical of the conservative commentariat. Fuck me he needs a slap.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. https://francoistremblay.wordpress.com/2016/01/04/mras-are-not-a-new-thing-by-a-long-shot/
      https://francoistremblay.wordpress.com/2015/06/23/what-if-1984-was-written-by-a-radfem/

      Delete
  4. Hi Dorothy,

    If you are looking for more meatier fare than the pap served up by David O. Russell, I would heartily recommend "Best of Enemies".

    https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=CzgfQvB2dvA

    This documentary charts the epic debates between the arch-conservative William F. Buckley Jr and the louche liberal Gore Vidal during the 1968 US Presidential election. Both are ferociously intelligent debaters and each loathes the other with a vengeance.

    It's the start of political punditry as we know it and shows how much smarter discourse once was and how depressingly how little it has changed.

    DiddyWrote

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    Replies
    1. thanks DW, the pond has taken that one in ...

      Delete
  5. Mad...fucking...witch...must...resist...imagining...Kevin-Meets-Carrie.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That Carry sounds interesting ... must check it out.

      Delete
  6. Replies
    1. I had a look at the Human Rights Commission site you've linked, and noticed the following:

      1. "Sexual harassment disproportionately affects women with 1 in 5 experiencing sexual harassment in the workplace at some time."

      Is it really as few as 1 in 5 ?

      2. "Despite being outlawed for over 25 years, sexual harassment remains a problem in Australia."

      Only 25 years ? That is, as long ago as since 1990 ? Wau, the human race has come a long way in a short time, hasn't it. Only 6000 or so years of recorded history in order to get to the point where Australia outlaws sexual harassment. And flirting has been fun for all that time, at least.

      3. There's currently nobody nominated as Sex Discrimination Commissioner. Can't be much of a problem then, can it.

      Thanks for the HRC pointer.

      Delete
    2. Can't be much of a problem then, can it.

      Apparently not.

      Delete
    3. This is anecdotal, not empirical, but a number of my 20-something female students work in hospitality, and they are expected not only to tolerate harassment, but to actively encourage it: 'flirting' with male customers is a mandated behaviour, and they are not permitted to work unless they are wearing the 'right' attire (and I don't mean formal black and white).

      Delete
    4. There will be plenty who can affirm that anecdotal evidence Mish, especially the unfortunates who work providing businessmen with their lunches and dinners (as many friends of the pond once did) ... the Playboy syndrome has never fully died, it's just gone behind closed restaurant doors ...

      Delete
    5. I did that stuff myself once, too, DP, at Carolina's Gentlemen's Club in Brisbane's West End - but it was way back in the late 80s, and I naively thought that 'mainstream' pubs and bars might be different these days. Silly Mish.

      Delete
  7. And remember 'flirty fishing'? Religions have used sex for years- just look at the sculpture of St Theresa having an orgasm which graces St Peter's in Rome. St Nick is even the patron saint of prostitutes.

    http://mentalfloss.com/article/15857/5-weirdest-patron-saints


    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. GHunt has even written a Wikipedia entry about it.

      https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sacred_prostitution

      Delete
  8. Only the Graudian can have a cartoon about sexism which features the word croquembouche. Wanker, mon ami?

    ReplyDelete

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