In which the pond does much reptile winnowing, and ends up chambering a dismal round ...

So the war in Iran lurched back to life yet again, despite the complete obliteration of the Iranian military, and displaying the same interest as they do in climate science, it disturbed the reptiles of the lizard Oz not at all.

Sure, you could find Cameron in full war monger mode buried away from the front page, several clicks away from the hive mind action...

Onus on Trump to act with conviction
Iran has launched an unprompted ballistic missile attack on US forces in the Middle East, intensifying pressure on Donald Trump to respond.
By Cameron Stewart
Chief International Correspondent

In typical fashion, he could only mount a two minute outburst, though possibly that's more than mad King Donald can reliably manage these days ...

Come on Cam, what's really going down?

Forget all that nonsense.

What was really top of the digital edition early this morning?

No prizes for guessing.

That unshakeable comrade Dan obsession, with the lizard Oz jihad on full parade ...

EXCLUSIVE
Labor braces for Dan Andrews inquisition
Daniel Andrews and Jacinta Allan face being hauled before Victoria’s royal commission as Ben Carroll vows no political figures will be shielded from the probe.
By Damon Johnston and Anthony Galloway

The pond quietly cursed the intermittent archive, which had only saved an earlier iteration of the yarn, but decided the beat up was only notable for the awesomely awful collage provided by a new name, a certain Matt Cotton, at the start of the show trial.

It's not all Matt's fault that the pond didn't cotton on to the story.

All that - there was a full five minutes - for a possible appearance before a yet to be formed Royal Commission?

The pond knew that this jihad was on in earnest because just below petulant Peta made an appearance ...

Commentary by Peta Credlin
You’ve got to take pity on Victorians, don’t you?
Whether Ben Carroll can shrug off his history or be forced to own it will all come down to how well Liberals can frame him.

Here the intermittent archive came good and all the pond needed to offer suffering Victorians was a teaser trailer for yet another burst of insufferable cockroach-laden condescension ...

Five minutes of petulant Peta slagging off?

The infallible Pope tried to help ...

Nah, sorry, infallible Pope, if you're on the right side, you can always consider scribbling for the reptiles.

The pond quickly moved over to the extreme far right of the digital edition, only to discover Jack had joined the jihad.

Jack began with an awesomely awful - and uncredited - collage, which reeked of AI, while Jack reeked of standard jihad platitudes ... and his use of "pike" only spiked the pond's interest, Jacinta’s band of loyalists have already marched on, Freshly minted Premier Ben Carroll is attempting the technically demanding reverse Kirner with Carmen Lawrence pike.

Hapless Victorians wanting an alternative read? Why not cross state lines? And change publications ...

Dark arts and dirty tricks: How the ghosts of ICACs past haunt Libs (*intermittent archive link)

A sickening feeling of deja vu from the ghosts of ICAC past is likely to be haunting some Liberal Party figures tuning in to the daily drama of the Operation Rosny corruption inquiry.
For the second day in a row, Dylan Whitelaw, 25, a former member of an ultra-conservative right-wing faction of the party called the Reformers, had difficulty recalling crucial events.
When shown a “sh*t sheet” on then-Liberal police minister David Elliott, which Whitelaw was allegedly involved in compiling, he replied, “It doesn’t refresh my memory. There’s components in there that I have zero recollection of.”

Or lie back and enjoy a cartoon ...

Not to worry, the same ability to ghost and disremember and discombobulate afflicts the lizards of Oz, and with the usual blather about respect, the pond also had not the slightest interest interest in the latest contribution to the Australian Daily Zionist News...

I was shot at Bondi. Then my attack turned into fodder for conspiracy theorists
Today, a lie doesn’t simply travel faster than the truth. It travels at the speed of an algorithm.

By Arsen Ostrovsky

How do you help talk of conspiracy theories? Best done by failing to pay attention. That usually turns the logarithms off ...

But all that winnowing and culling left the pond in a truly dire situation.

Had the pond come to this? 

Had the pond arrived at Geoff chambering yet another round, offering sage advice for the beefy boofhead?

Yes, it was time for Geoff to urge the beefy boofhead to go full Pauline, and embrace Gina's pampered pet ...

There wasn't even a question mark in the header, which was more an order than a commentary: Time for Angus Taylor to invite Pauline Hanson for tea and unite against Anthony Albanese; Angus Taylor faces mounting pressure from colleagues to engage with Pauline Hanson as the Coalition’s primary vote languishes at 19 per cent.

The caption for the snap, a feeble uncredited collage (Matt? Matt? where are you) which co-joined a triumphant bright red and orange Pauline, and a downcast, downtrodden, grey and despairing beefy boofhead: Angus Taylor needs to have a cup of tea with Pauline Hanson.

What was truly remarkable was the way the reptiles tried to inject some life into this two minute proposal to run up the flag and surrender was the way snap after snap kept appearing to try to add some weight:

The longer he refuses to pick up the phone and chat with the One Nation leader, the more pressure he faces from colleagues and supporters who want clarity over how he intends to forge a working relationship with Hanson.
With the federal Coalition’s primary vote languishing at 19 per cent in Newspoll and core support for One Nation sitting equal with Labor’s at 30 per cent, many conservatives believe Taylor needs an open dialogue with Hanson.

Open dialogue? Is that what the chambering one calls embracing Gina's pampered pet, and her embrace of the most far right lizard Oz policies? Pauline Hanson. Picture: NewsWire/Philip Gostelow

Get it on, beefy boofhead, the reptiles of Oz have spoken and the hive mind is on board ...

The weekly news cycle featuring Coalition MPs and party figures talking about whether or not the Liberals and Nationals should work more closely with One Nation is untenable. There are those in the Coalition who believe a tight conservative bloc is required to defeat the second-term Albanese Labor government at the next election. Others, mainly moderates in metropolitan areas, want to tip-toe around the question.
Anthony Albanese is banking on the three conservative parties, and others such as Clive Palmer’s United Australia Party, not getting their acts together.
While One Nation and the Coalition play predictable political games, Taylor late on Wednesday finally replied positively but vaguely to Hanson’s good faith offer about working with the Coalition on strengthening national security laws.

Time now for fear mongering of a patented lizard Oz kind, Australian doctor Tareq Kamleh calls for violence in an ISIS video.

The Islamics, the Islamics! Quick, rush to the side of Gina's pampered pet ...

Public anxiety is rising about the returning ISIS brides, and potentially fighters, in addition to ongoing concerns about Islamic extremist threats following the Bondi Beach terror attack targeting Jewish-Australians. This feeds into the broader debate over immigration and its impacts on housing, infrastructure and taxpayer-funded supports.
Hanson’s move for One ­Nation to draft its own Protecting Australians from Foreign Terrorist Fighters Bill and lobby support from crossbenchers ahead of parliament returning on August 11 indicates the right-wing party won’t stand still and wait for the Coalition.

Eek, even more Islamics, ‘ISIS bride’ Janai Safar arrives at a Sydney police station after being escorted from the airport on her return to Australia. Pictire: Will Seitam

Quick now, a preference swap! Maybe even a coalition? Thought about having Pauline as the new minister for immigration?

She'd put those damned Islamics in their place.

At the end of the day, even if One Nation’s primary vote slips ahead of the next election, the ­Coalition will desperately need preferences from Hanson’s party. That scenario will play out at the November state election in Victoria. For Victorian Liberal leader Jess Wilson to win, she will need strong preference flows from One Nation.

Time to bring in a nobody, Outgoing opposition home affairs spokesman Jonno Duniam. Picture: Nikki Davis-Jones

But what of that terrifying dragon, evoked by the immortal Rowe?

No time for that, time for another reptile anxiety attack.

Leading on national security matters should be bread and butter for the Coalition.
It is a concern that Jonno ­Duniam remains in the role of opposition home affairs and immigration spokesman almost seven weeks after announcing he was quitting politics. Duniam, who is expected to remain in the role until the end of the year, is ready to leave the parliament and his other job as manager of opposition business in the Senate. Taylor will need to replace him and appoint an acting finance spokesman when Claire Chandler goes on maternity leave within weeks.

Quick, drag in the beefy boofhead, Angus Taylor. Picture: NewsWire / Gaye Gerard

And now for the reptile orders. 

Quick step, march, look lively now, you must follow the orders, you will obey ..

Taylor must take control of the critically important portfolios and lead the narrative around the ­Coalition’s national security and immigration policies. While the Coalition and One Nation tout similar policies, One Nation currently has greater cut-through with conservative voters.
The Liberal leader has waged a strong case on the economy and warned about the perils of One Nation leading a government, but he needs to strengthen his messaging on immigration and ­national security.

A brief promo for the Vics, so that the hive mind will recognise more than a snap of Moira Deeming in a headlock.

Come on down Jess, you're lucky snap number seven in a two minute chambering, Victorian Liberal leader Jess Wilson. Jason Edwards

Now for the wrap.

Follow orders and there's redemption. Fail, and there's only doom ...

Wilson, who followed a long list of failed Victorian Liberal leaders, has shown her federal colleagues there is a pathway back through hard work, grit, ruthlessness and consistency. David Crisafulli and Lia Finocchiaro did the same in Queensland and the Northern Territory, respectively.
The Coalition needs to present as a viable and credible alternative government. The Liberals and Nationals must keep repeating messaging that connects with voters who are seeking real action and support in their lives, rather than “pie in the sky” slogans and Canberra-driven policies.

Just do it ... just get into bed with Gina's pampered pet and all will go well. What could possibly go wrong?

As for those European wildfires?

Again the pond can proudly boast that there's not a single mention of Europe or wildfires on the front digital page of the lizard Oz.

Correspondents know where to go, anywhere but the lizard Oz ...

And while travelling enjoy a Wilcox ...

The pond apologises for producing such a dismal outing, but is always unnerved when petulant Peta makes a return.

She'd last been sighted in the lizard Oz way back on 4th June, and the pond had almost forgotten she existed ...

Speaking of reprobate, deplorable, reprehensibles, it would be remiss of the pond not to note a guest appearance by shameless Sharri, full disrespect, with her come hither look designed to stimulate the loins of the aged hive mind demographic ...

FARCICAL HEARING
Fauci referenced Markson’s Covid reporting, invokes fifth amendment over 100 times

Dr Fauci’s journals show he followed reports by The Australian about Covid
Diary entries of America’s top pandemic adviser reveal he was angered by an investigation in The Australian that exposed his funding of risky research in Wuhan.
By Tia Clarkson-Pascoe

Again the pond failed the test. 

The sight of this unholy visual conjunction, Fauci up against the simpering one was simply too much ...

And in any case, for that, there was this ...