In which the pond is forced to listen to groaners groaning and bromancers whining, while stories erupt elsewhere ...

 

A day too late for the Major's Monday outing this week, but Media Watch has likely provided the Major with the topic for his next outburst and his ongoing war with the show ... though he was only MID, with chief attention paid to prize maroons of the Bolter and Rowan Dean kind, after a detour through the maroons at the WSJ ...

Meanwhile, on another planet ...

Greece is burning? The font of Western Civilisation that the reptiles like to wax lyrical about every so often? Do tell, the pond must check out how the reptiles are attending to the crisis ...

Nope, nothing to see there ... and yet "now's the time to be informed". Is there any way to be informed in the comments section?

Nope, just the usual ratbag rabble, including an opposition member, what with the lizard Oz still the Pravda or RT if you will for Dr No's team ...

Speaking of censoring free speech or covering matters that get the reptiles and the readership unnecessarily agitated, perhaps the pond missed an item at the top of the digital page?

Nope, just a parade of the usual suspects and topics. Nothing like an EXCLUSIVE on a transgender item to top a country in flames ...

Enough already, the pond has laboured the point, and is in a grumpy mood, because the pond had bet heavily on there being a big groaning this day at the modest, mild, voluntary changes to casual employment ...

Instead it was well being that set off Dame Groan, and here the pond must begin with an apology. The pond rarely pays attention to the quality of lizard Oz cartooning, because frankly it ranges between the abysmal and the dismal, but here there was no avoiding it ... and it seriously affected the pond's sense of well-being ...

The pond was so shocked by the - to put it gently - piss weak quality of the cartoon that the pond completely missed the opening groan. The pond immediately decided to bring together the rest of the visual offerings that cluttered the groaning ...

It's simple ... whenever you feel triggered, revert to snap of demonic figure and run shrieking from the room ...

Ah there you go, the land of fush and chups in ruins. But what of news of the font of Western Civilisation?

Alas and alack, no room at the inn for such trivia ... who gives a fig or a toss about the well-being of others? And so the pond can return to the comfort of a dinkum groaning ...

Yes, there's nothing like attempting to create better lives to generate a laugh. It's a bit like the horse laugh the reptiles get when anyone talks about saving the planet.

Never mind, by this point, it should be obvious that the pond is only serving up this groaning because of the insatiable desire of Dame Groan cultists to devour every miserable word from the misery guts ... (lordy lordy the pond hasn't used those words since its time in Tamworth) ...

Indeed, indeed, Dame Groan's well being as a fat cat board member contemplating her shares in Santos is a tad removed from the pond's experiences ...

And if the groaning wasn't enough, there was a serve of the usual bromancer tosh this day ...

The pond decided it couldn't wait for the actual triggers in the story. Why not get the pictures out of the way right at the get go?

It's true that some might miss the moment when the bromancer gets wildly excited at the thought of missiles spurting into the atmosphere ... how he loves a good spurt ... but sacrifices have to be made ...

Unfortunately the pond can never be bothered separating the heading from the lead photo, so there's one traumatic shot of demonic figures that must appear in context ...

People are leaving the army, and not the navy, at a rate of knots? The pond had rather thought they made be leaving at a rte of kph, but are they irreplaceable? Isn't the bromancer himself standing by to take command of the army, the navy, and the airforce and everything else to do with defence?

Meanwhile, the brave lad has the cheek to start off the next gobbet with "It fills me with pain to write these words", which is preposterous because it implies that the bromancer has been filled with more pain than an arthritis sufferer for decades, year upon year of scribbling all the same words that amount to an excruciating bromancer word salad ...

With the snaps gone, the bromancer's gobbets are looking a little thin. Might the pond make a suggestion as to what could have been covered in lieu of his bog standard rant about defence?

It was top of the NY Times this morning ...

No, no takers, Israel's a bit like Greece these days in the reptile universe, is it?

Never mind, moving along ...

No dammit, no. The pond is heartily tired of the dog botherer in an acronym stew and blathering about AUKUS.

There must be stories of interest out there ... perhaps a visit to Haaretz?

Amazing, countries burning, countries flooding, countries in turmoil, and yet "now's the time to be informed", and yet being informed consists of another tiresome and tedious rant by the bromancer?

Is there a decent cartoonist who might help the pond in its hour of need? Something to get through the bromancer's fluff gathering and navel gazing and constant, incessant ranting about defence? Something to take the pond's mind off the news the reptiles routinely refuse to cover?

Um, not exactly what the pond had in mind, but it does get the pond to the last "we'll all be rooned" bromancer offering ... especially as this week, he's suddenly decided to go kinda funny about AUKUS and the subs and all that ...

Actually there's a planetary emergency, visible in plain sight and right in front of us, except it's nowhere to be seen or to be found in the lizard Oz ... but waddya know, the infallible Pope saw it at the flicks ...

... while the immortal Rowe took a reading...

Update: "now's the time to be informed", anywhere but the lizard Oz ...