In which the pond makes the bromancer the winner, and the Donald a loser, but realises losers can be winners too ...

 

 

 

 

Of course the pond was going to go with the bromancer for its Sunday meditation - the onion muncher's bestie scribbling about the Donald's legacy, how could it go wrong? 

 

Yes, yes, the pond has seen all the faux news headlines this morning announcing the Donald's defeat, and the bromancer was scribbling yesterday, but he probably sniffed the wind, and decided that, while standing defiant, something of a post-mortem was needed.  So we should still pay heed to an irrelevance scribbling about a spectre that will go on haunting the landscape.

It was inevitable the pond would have to weaken on the matter of refusing to discuss the Donald, because all the reptiles are Donald are obsessed, and the choice between the dog botherer and the bromancer and after this slap down how could the pond go with the dog botherer?

 

The rich tables of schadenfreude laid for days and weeks ahead! On one of the small entry tables is the fact that the Dog Botherer is there to see the collapse at first hand. All his dreams of High fiving Dame Slap upon return in that shared moment of parsing Trump's brilliance lie in a small pool below his table.

Shush, VC, no gloating this day, oh okay a little gloating, but keep it seemly, though truly the choice between the dog botherer and the bromancer on the Donald matter was akin to a choice between the smell of a dog shit sandwich versus crunching into a tasty onion, with copious tears of pain to flow.

The pond felt very Marina Hyde about the enterprise ...

 

 

The phase will pass? 

 

Sadly it's unlikely, it's the pond's observation that temper tantrums last a lifetime, and if he's eventually forced to walk and wear the humiliating tag of loser - Donald Trump, loser: He now has to own the insult he most loves to hurl at others - he'll be clomping about for years like a combination of the ghost of Captain Ahab and the Ancient Mariner, sans wisdom learned at sea ...

But as usual the pond is just avoiding the bromancer moment, knowing what's coming, the celebration of the legacy of a sucker and a loser. 

 

The bromancer will deplore the Donald's vulgarity, his beastial coarseness, his policy blunders - what virus? - and his supporters - of the mount their heads on pikes Steve Bannon kind - and discover the goodness and the triumphs and the wonders and the splendors of the Donald's possibly short reign, possibly cut off in its legal action prime, if all those faux news celebrations are correct (it was Jimmy Kimmel's joke about Wolf's cardio, improved by constant walking across the set, that made it so funny to wake up to the sight of Wolf anxiously pacing across the set yet again this morning) ...

 

 

Yes, set all the cheating, lying, fraudulent and outrageous aside. Trump's achievement for dictators, authoritarians, and autocrats world wide is huge. For starters, you can find scribblers explaining how to set the cheating, lying, fraudulent, nepotic, monarchical, tyrannical behaviour aside, and go on indulging yourself in cheating and lying.

Huge!

 

 

 

 

You see, even if you're a loser, you can be a winner. Sure Joe might be a record winner, but Donald the loser was a record winner too ... and yet in days past, the reptiles used to scribble frantically about the mollycoddling of the congratulatory culture of entitled millennials, and what sooks it was making of young people ...

 

It seems in the bromancer's new world no one goes home without a trophy or a record ...

 

Now on for some visual flag-waving and the bromancer's patented form of ambivalence, but only for a moment, because out of that ambivalence will come the bromancer's admiration. He really does like a con artist and a fraud, a snake oil showman with style, a bankrupt not afraid to fuck a country ...

 

Yes, that talk of ending fossil fuels is truly frightening, whereas to the likes of the bromancer, the talk of ending the planet is just grist for the Sunday readings from the Book of Revelation on the Apocalypse ... (not sure if they'll make the rapture, that heretical mob).

As for that 50-50 thing again, another reptile mantra, the pond has already broken Godwin's law by noting that Germans (and Italians) and assorted other tribes have at some point liked a tyrant or a fascist ... and so won't mention it because the swear jar is full to overflowing ... perhaps just as much to the point, at one time, half the country thought slavery was a fine and useful thing. Yes, the 50-50 rule reaps some strange fruit ...

And now to some pronouncements as wildly emphatic as they are delusional, because who knows what the world will be like in five years time? No one had the first clue five years ago that we'd get to here by starting there, and anyone who thinks Boris's time in power is a sure thing must think that Malware is still PM ... and we never ran into a concrete truck called 'virus' ...

 

And there's the funny thing. An alleged billionaire is a middle finger for ordinary Americans? 

More like dumb Americans, in one state chanting "stop the count" and in another "count the vote", leading one late night comic to conclude that most of all Trump supporters liked chanting ... because the way the system skews in the United States (and with Uber's win in California), you'll be getting three fifths of fuck all, except the pleasure of chanting and enjoying the freedom of being stony broke ... while their mate Moscow Mitch makes out like a Russian oligarch, and does his best to thwart and frustrate and Joe reverts to executive orders, and oh, it could all become so painful, the reptiles could embark on yet another crusade of fear and loathing, their primary mission in life ...

And so to the final gobbet with some fine fatuities ...

 

Trump didn't control the military? What's that Commander-in-Chief title for then? Just decoration? He didn't give an order that challenged the military to the point of defiance, though he pissed off a lot of the military along the way. But if he wanted personnel to clear the path for a 'bible waving in the air' session, he could always command people to attend ...

Still, as for the bromancer's conclusion, who could argue? Out of world war II, Germany managed to achieve a remarkable recovery. While it might be said that his legacy was mixed, Adolf's was by no means all bad ... there are good people on all sides, including sociopaths. And the same might be said for Japan at the same time, though the pond can't be bothered hammering the point that much because there doesn't seem to be a George Marshall on the horizon in the US right at the moment ... just a spectre haunting the country ...

And so to a traumatic decision in the hunger games. If Donald can be a winner by becoming a record-winning loser, shouldn't the pond at least allow a consolation prize for those that give it their best shot? 

Especially if it's good old crusader Henry, better known for his work on buckets and ancient Athens, but also a valiant warrior ...

 

 

 

 

Now at the outset it's a ritual for the pond to observe that it has no time for Islamic fundamentalists. Or Islamics for that matter if they start talking religion. But then the pond has no time for Xians, barking mad evangelical, cult Catholic, complimentary woman Sydney Anglican, whatever, whether creationist or transubstantiationist. 

 

Nor does the pond have any time for liberal, orthodox or fundamentalist Jews. No forks in the garden for the pond. Or is it spoons? Whatever, some sort of cutlery. In any of these circles, a secular atheist isn't an appealing bill of goods ... (the pond also has doubts about Santa and the Easter Bunny but that's for another time). If they keep the peace with the pond, the pond will keep peace with them, enjoy the benefits of a wide-ranging cuisine, and let believers do their thing, while the pond does nothing ...
 

So please, don't get the pond involved in crusader wars ...

 

 

 

Ever wonder where Islamic paranoia came from? Well a lot of it is prodded along by the likes of unhelpful Henry.

No doubt he read a lot of books in his youth, when stories about the crusades were rampant ... and featured shots of brave youths in gladiatorial posed against the threatening hordes ... Richard the Lionheart and all that (why did Robin Hood develop bone spurs and stay at home? It's a bit like Batman and Superman not intervening in 'Nam).

That's how each tribe gees up the other, and tries to get others to enlist in their tribe ...

 

 

Paranoia is the name of the game, the best weapon by far, because the paranoid gets the fear going something shocking, and our Henry has a dose of the fear in bucket-loads. 

It was only a few weeks ago he was off on the same crusade, lathering up a storm ...and earning a cult master illustration that showed off perfectly his modus operandi ... fear, say hello to hysteria ...

 

Well the pond is pleased that the government keeps track of Islamic fundamentalists, since they're no friend of the pond, but the pond is also pleased that it keeps track of, and rates highly as a threat, white supremacists with Islamophobic tendencies - it was after all a white Australian who shamed the nation in a New Zealand mosque ... and it has to be asked, would Henry's screed be so far out of place as not to find a home in a white supremacist publication?

 

 

You know, at the end of all that, the pond was looking for an illustration for our Henry's screed of fear, and landed on this ...

It came from the public Christianity site doing a zany study of the crusades, asking towards the end these questions?

Love thine enemies? Oh I don't think so, the pond's a pretty good hater, and if you look at good old Henry, when he's not mending buckets, he makes a pretty good hater too ... right down there with Islamic fundamentalists ...

Warrior culture? Why old Henry is as dinkum a warrior as you can find when you prise the port from his hand and pluck him from his leather chair ...

Not to worry. With a bit of luck, the pond will soon be mailing off its last commentary by the bromancer on the Donald ... perhaps using a stamp furnished by the immortal Rowe...

Yes there was another Rowe that caught the pond's eye here ...