In which the Major provides a most excellent FUD distraction, while the lizard Oz editorialist offers a serve of avocado on toast (don't forget the cracked pepper) ...

 

Thought for the day: Go tell the Reptiles, stranger passing by, that here obedient to their words we lie ... distort, obfuscate, confuse, conflate, anger, befog, bewilder, baffle, discombobulate and alienate ... (origin uncertain, original sometimes attributed to Simonides)

For an alarming moment, the pond thought it might have to deal with events in the middle east, as refracted through the Murdochian mindset - it's too messy and miserable for a comedy blog, when the end of the world via climate change is much more fun. 

Relief was at hand, courtesy of the Major, raising alarums about EVs, in a FUD style the Major has perfected over the years in relation to any matter which might be perceived as being related to climate science ...

Yes, global figures make it clear that EV fires are rare, and so are petrol engine fires, though the pond has seen a few, and as a result, even carried a fire extinguisher for years, until the tedium of recharging exceeded the chance of a fire  ...

Here the reptiles wanted to help out the Major with horror snaps, but apparently could find only one cheap snap of an EV fire, and so settled for a bland snap of an EV charger, as another space filler and visual distraction ... (surely they could have photoshopped in some flames licking at the tyre?)

The pond has done it many times before but would like to honour the Major's ongoing efforts at FUD ... it was way back in 2014 that the Major was honoured by Clive Hamilton as one of his dirty dozen of climate science foes. It ran in Crikey and could still be found for those for whom the paywall isn't a problem, and the Major was in exalted company...

There's no reason to worry too much about those links. Newspapers, especially Murdochian ones, have the habit of dropping links like lice ...

A few survive ... on the third go, the pond landed on one at The Conversation, a certain Michael Ashely back in 2011 celebrating the deeds of the reptiles under the Major ... a sample ...

Reflect on his culpability? Not the Major, he's an old hand at the game and he likes to keep his skills up ...

What's astonishing about this? Apparently the Major is a Graudian reader ... probably on the basis of know your enemy so you can revile them ...

Meanwhile, the Major has scoured the world for news to help with his FUD, a sole voice braying into the wind, while motoring journalists do the naughty ...

Might not the Major mention that because of climate change, insurance policies have already soared. 

Thinking of a seachange, the pond has been checking out homes in the mighty 'Gong, and if a house is anywhere near the bush, (a) they're very difficult to move in an otherwise buoyant market and (b) very hard to get an insurance quote for, unless you're happy to be lumbered with a 10k a year policy ...

Never mind, the last thing the Major needs to do is trouble us with such details ... the quest for FUD in relation to climate change is never ending ...

Say what? Suddenly the Major is a major environmentalist? Suddenly the Major cares about emissions and alleged greenhouse gases?

But there's nothing to worry about. The Major himself is on hand to reassure. Back in 2022, the Major starred in The Graudian, The Australian reheats discredited climate claims in Cop ‘fact check’, and sure enough, if you followed the link contained in that yarn berating the Major, and could get past the lizard Oz paywall, there was the Major telling the world not to worry ...

There's more, in the usual Major way, but the pond reluctantly cut the Major off ... so it could get on to the final current Major gobbet, because the pond has been warned that endlessly repeating past Major wisdom can lead to blindness, or at least hair on palms of hands ...

In the US punters have might become more aware of Uncle Elon's inability to control quality (while also spewing far right texts and fellow travelling with neo-Nazis), but while the market might have come off high boil, it's warming up nicely, much like the planet ... it just depends on the model, and here the pond might offer a plug ...

Hyundai Motor America reported 68,961 vehicle sales in the United States in September, which is 16 percent more than a year ago. The year-to-date result amounted to 595,147 units (up 13 percent year-over-year).

The South Korean brand has reasons to be happy also about its all-electric car sales. The Hyundai E-GMP-based all-electric cars - Ioniq 5 and Ioniq 6 - noted a strong growth rate and once again almost set a new monthly record.

In September, the company sold 5,623 Ioniq 5 and Ioniq 6 in the US, which is about a 331 percent increase year-over-year and 8.2 percent of the automaker's total volume. The Ioniq 5 is the best-selling all-electric Hyundai model with 3,958 units, supplemented by an additional 1,665 Ioniq 6s. (here, October 2023)

If the pond had the cash at hand, it wouldn't be worried by the Major's FUD, or Uncle Elon ... it'd go the Ioniq 6, and FUD about fires be damned ...

Then there was some good news. 

For whatever reason, the Caterist had gone MIA, and all that was left was either the Voice or the middle east mess, with silly old Paul Keating contributing to the Chairman Emeritus's coffers by lurking behind the paywall ...

The pond has no doubt that the Caterist will turn up in due course, as bad pennies are wont to do, and then the pond can celebrate yet again, but in the meantime, as the pond had already got the reptile FUD about cars, why not the lizard Oz editorialist generating FUD about housing ...

The lizard Oz editorialist rubbing an abundant amount of salt into the wound, and doing what reptiles do, which is quote each other incessantly on their ability to corner the market in wisdom? The only remaining question for the pond was whether they'd go the avocado on toast routine ...

"A new generation, meanwhile, must realise that getting a home has always required a level of sacrifice that they must be willing to make."

The pond looked at the judges anxiously. Would they allow this as doing a Gurner? After a nervous wait, the judges gave the pond the nod. It would be fine to turn to the Graudian, back in May 2017 celebrating the Gurner ... sure he's done even better since then, but the original remains a thing of beauty ...

"A new generation, meanwhile, must realise that getting a home has always required a level of sacrifice that they must be willing to make, and that includes wasting money on avocado toast and coffee."

Take heed vulgar youff ... and so to the pond's only word on the middle east mess, coming in the form of the immortal Rowe's outing ...