Just look at the Saturday treats on parade!
No wonder the pond is deeply stressed.
So many bon bons, so little time.
Ah, the Tamworth pause that refreshes.
Of course the pond was sorely tempted by prattling Polonius. How true that everyone on the left believes we're living in a dictatorship run by Tony Abbott, but how wrong they are.
It's a dictatorship being run by Chairman Rupert's minions!
Truth to tell, the other day the pond was fascinated by prattling Polonius's wonderful sense of humour and his attempt to re-introduce courtesy into the world, chiding David Marr for daring to crack a fat joke:
The truth – overlooked in these impatient times – is that ambitious gay men make splendid husbands. They have careers, children, rather stocky wives and the occasional lifesaver on the side. But splendid husbands.
What’s this “rather stocky wives” bit? David Marr – off to Hendo’s Courtesy Class for you.
In the same courteous piece, the courteous Polonius deployed a tasteful array of insights: sandalistas, a joke about wearing a new frock (men in frocks are sooh funny, ask any footballer or navy officer), sneerer in chief, boring scribbler, Marxist comedian, absolute tosh, false prophet of Palm Beach, lousy predictions, and so on and on, aimed at the usual suspects, and the pond realised, with a sudden rush of relief, that it was perfectly okay to name the tedious old fart and pedant after Polonius ... apart from the defamation of Polonius that it necessarily entailed ...
But Polonius talking of Marr got the pond to thinking.
We haven't had a fierce outburst about Christians being persecuted by the existence of gay people and their unholy desires and demands for ... well at least for a week, though it seems it's a daily event in the lizard Oz.
So Shanahan minor, she of the angels, became the obvious way forward:
Indeed, indeed.
Consummate logic of the first water. There is absolutely no right for people of the same sex to marry, that's a made up right.
Whereas marriage between a flock of people isn't a made up right! It's in the bible:
And I gave thee thy master’s house, and thy master’s wives into thy bosom, and gave thee the house of Israel and of Judah; and if that had been too little, I would moreover have given unto thee such and such things.
That'd be 2 Samuel 12:8 and the pond was always moved that the long absent lord should think that, if a couple of hundred wives and concubines weren't enough, he could always give more ...
And what a relief to learn that all those barren, useless people who think they're married aren't really.
And how delightful to see that term "sexual congress" rear its ugly head, thereby removing any need to talk of a good fuck ...
Trust freedom boy to get it all wrong. So gay to be thinking of all the frocks for the wedding and the decorations on the cake. So frivolous and light-headed. What's the bet he was thinking about the honeymoon rather than the serious business of the outrageous persecution of fundamentalist Taliban types (and their Christian consorts)?
But wait, there's more, a lot more, because it's easy to get fundamentalist Taliban types (and their Christian consorts) upset.
There's all sorts of persecution going on:
And so it turns out that the lizard Australian, a newspaper the pond had imagined was in circulation in tree killer form and on the full to overflowing intertubes, when actually it's just Angela Shanahan's home closet, where she retreats to whisper her thoughts....
...About 'natural marriage', roughly akin to 'natural yoghurt' and 'natural unpasteurised milk' or 'natural cheese', grommet, - the pond disclaims any poisoning of anyone trying same - with said 'natural marriage' inter alia excluding all marriages involving pagans, heathens, philistines, atheists, and religious ceremonies of a schismatic, Henry VIII or heretical kind ...
No wonder the lizard Oz's circulation is heading to home closet level, unless you happen to be in an airport and pick it up for free, thanks to Shanahan whispering her thoughts, as it seems some might think paying for idiocies a bit rich ...
Now it's no news that all sorts of ratbags have been humming the same tune, whispering their thoughts within the recesses of their homes and nowhere else.
You can head off here for that chicken licking video ...
What's wonderful is the paranoia and the persecution complex involved, as if snatching away the right to persecute gays - done in great style for a couple of thousands years - is a crime and a sin ... and somehow it only involves Christians, when in fact all the fundamentalists share the same Taliban faith ...
Meanwhile, speaking of cake ...
Churches abrogated their say on who could get married when they allowed the state to recognise marriages between divorcees, heathens, athiests, mixed religeons and even those who had never exchanged vows and just lived in sin for long enough.
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