Miranda Devine, Piers Akerman, bushfires, the solution to the greenies problem and Vietnam as an inspiration

(Above: no, not Queensland, but Vietnam. Bulldozers with Rome plows clear jungle growth while mechanized infanty stands guard. See here).

Please explain why we've wasted squillions on an investigation of the bushfires in Victoria?

What an abuse of taxpayers dollars.

Why the matter was sorted back in February 2009 when Miranda the Devine solved the problem, under the header Green ideas must take blame for deaths.

Yes, it was the greenies. And what should happen to greenies? Hang 'em high, hang 'em hard, hang 'em so they dangle in the breeze and turn into food for the cawing crows.

So many people need not have died so horribly. The warnings have been there for a decade. If politicians are intent on whipping up a lynch mob to divert attention from their own culpability, it is not arsonists who should be hanging from lamp-posts but greenies.

Why on earth did they waste money on a Royal Commission when the issue is so clear cut? It's the bloody tree changers, organic farmers and artists living to the north of Melbourne who caused it all, a green wedge, a flock of greenies who stopped the entire north of Victoria from being chopped down and turned into a suburban carpark. Try setting fire to concrete and tar!

Now don't try any excuses, like climate change:

It wasn't climate change which killed as many as 300 people in Victoria last weekend. It wasn't arsonists. It was the unstoppable intensity of a bushfire, turbo-charged by huge quantities of ground fuel which had been allowed to accumulate over years of drought. It was the power of green ideology over government to oppose attempts to reduce fuel hazards before a megafire erupts, and which prevents landholders from clearing vegetation to protect themselves.

Piers Akerman knows the truth too, though you might not guess it from his bizarrely titled Cool heads prevail in Black Saturday study (Cool heads? What's that mean?)

In 1939, Australians who lived in the bush were more aware of the dangers. Today’s tree-changers proclaim their environmental awareness but don’t know enough about the bush to manage the risks inherently caused by the green movement.

Why yes I've always found people in the bush blithely unaware of the dangers of bushfires. Talk to anyone in the Blue Mountains and the first thing they'll say is "bushires? Nah, mate, none around here."

And Piers' impeccable survey of the attitudes of people in the bush in 1939 (survey sample size zero) compared to attitudes of people in the bush today (survey sample size unknown) is just another fine example of Piers' scientific method at work. In much the same way as journalists in Australia in 1939 were more aware of the dangers of being a blithering idiot, as opposed to journalists today, influenced as they are greenies, lefties and socialist ways of thinking.

But back to Miranda. Having decided as prosecutor, judge and jury just who was guilty (damn you greenie tree huggers), you can see why she was so shocked today in Fire prevention on backburner.

This week's interim report has drawn criticism because it didn't identify scapegoats to crucify. Clearly mistakes were made that terrible day, but the fires were out of control, a perfect storm of weather and fuel loads pushing them at a speed and intensity that could not be stopped.

What? No scapegoats to crucify, when the greenies and their lick spittle servants, the politicians are so clearly to blame?

Well no need I suppose. We all know that it was tree hugger greenies, to which we can now add public parks and politicians intent on serving a political need to win the support of green voters. And failing to burn off everything in sight. And did we mention failure to put down enough tar and concrete?

And wouldn't you know, the language of the royal commission's interim report is Orwellian:

The Orwellian language of the interim report, which rebadges ''evacuation'' as ''relocation'', hardly engenders confidence that people will be any safer in bushfire seasons to come.

Especially because so far as I know, no one has yet hung one greenie from one lamp-post as punishment for causing the Victorian bushfires.

When the next bushfire season rolls around, don't say you haven't been warned. Hang a greenie from a lamp-post today.

And stop using Orwellian language when plain language can express exactly what you mean. Greenies and politicians together:

Teary politicians might pepper their talking points with opportunistic intimations of "climate change" and "unprecedented" weather, but they are only diverting the blame. With yes-minister fudging and craven inclusion of green lobbyists in decision-making, they have greatly exacerbated this tragedy.

Hang on, hang on. What's this late breaking offering from Akker Dakker?

The interim report released yesterday into Victoria’s fatal Black Saturday bushfires reflects cooler thinking than was displayed by those who hysterically jumped on the global warming bandwagon last January and February.

Royal commission chairman Justice Bernard Teague and assistant commissioners Susan Pascoe and Ron McLeod appear to have ignored the green cultists’ plea for relevance and focused their attention on practical measures that might reduce the terrible toll when the same extreme weather conditions occur in the future.

The 376-page report released by Victorian Premier John Brumby correctly assumes that bushfires will always be with us and addresses measures which need to be taken to prevent the loss of another 173 lives and the destruction of homes, property, livestock and wild life.

Cooler thinking than the hysterical carry on of green cultists? Calm and measured like Miranda the Devine? Sensible practical measures?

What's this, confusion in the cult of commentariat columnists?

Relax, if you read Akker Dakker, he also bangs on about fuel reduction as the very bestest solution (with hanging greenies perhaps a bonus optional extra).

Yep, it seems my campaign to turn rural Australia into a giant carpark for the biggest mall in the world, perhaps the universe, might still gain momentum, and save the countryside. After all, if you have to destroy something to save it, you get the joy of destruction as well as the pleasure of salvation.

Right now, I'm trying to get Jeffrey Smart to do a painting on the mall car park theme entitled "A Vision for Australia". But he's resistant to my idea of showing a greenie hanging from a lamp-post in the top right hand corner of the picture. Even the bloody artists are in the grip of Orwellian greenie leftie double speak thinking.

But it is the best solution. We will prevail.

And look how well Vietnam turned out with a dash of chemicals and a little defoliation.

(Below: a properly defoliated Vietnamese canal. Try lighting a wildfire there, you greenies. Ah, the joys of agent orange, though perhaps we should also beware the dangers of agent orange affected mutant greenies marching like zombies against right minded fuel reducing citizens).