In which, courtesy of global geopolitical imperatives a bully takes a powder and Maurice Newman uses an ABC radio poll to demolish climate science ...

(Above: an old David Pope, lathering up the pond for the footbrawl to come, and more Pope here).

The pond has been waiting weeks for this, the grudge match from hell.

Two would step into the cage, but only one would emerge. There would be blood, eye-gouging, stiff arms, coathangers, whatever you like, a free for all, a barney of the kind you used to get out the back of Maguire's hotel in Tamworth ...

Now the pond deplores violence, but hey, what's the harm in looking?

Say what?

Two went into the cage, and one bully came out sounding as meek and as mild as prime Tamworth lamb?

He's going to speak to him? Dear sweet absent lord, the pond routinely speaks to lots of people. Ask the pond a question, and it's likely the pond will speak, unless it's an all-day sulk day.

Yep, that's what it says: Tony Abbott will speak to Vladimir Putin about MH17 'one way or another' ...

Uh huh. One way or another ... will he throw in a bonus foot-stamp? And a patented surly Abbott stare?

Surely the reptiles at the Oz would be urging their hero on. Surely it's not too late for the valiant crusader to spike the Ruskie's guns, deliver that broadside, shirtfront that fiend ...

Oh no. He's fallen into line, he's been overtaken by global geopolitical imperatives. So that's what takes a powder means ...

Truth to tell, the pond always thought the bully's comfort level was slamming a couple of fists into the wall alongside the head of a woman in a university corridor ...

Put a bully up against a real bully, and soon enough the second rate bully is going to be sending out missives about global geopolitical imperatives.

Sorry Campbell, looks like rioting in the streets is the only way to protest the Russian presence ... please, make sure no innocent cane toads are trampled by the crowd.

But enough of that comedy, let's turn to some real comedy, because one of the world's leading climate scientists has spoken yet again ... thanks to the eternal support of science emanating from the reptiles at the lizard Oz.

Yes, Moorice has overtaken the Pellists and the Bolter as the guardian of the flame.

There's a basic cognitive dissonance at work here.

While Greg 'walri' Hunt goes about, assuring anyone who will listen, that the government accepts the science, and that the government's direct action  plan is a dead cert  to work as the policy designed to tackle the serious business of climate change, Tony Abbott's business advisor is wandering around saying that climate science is fraudulent...

Ipso facto, to admire Latin like a Gough, either Greg 'wiki it here' is a cheat and a liar, or deeply cynical, or deeply misguided, and in any case, is currently perpetrating a massive fraud on the Australian taxpayer.

That's if Newman is right. Well Tony Abbott seems to take him seriously as an advisor ...

Does Hunt realise he's being routinely defamed by Newman? Or is he too dumb to even understand that simple outcome?

Now the pond isn't going to carry on about the impeccable primary research conducted by Newman.

Truth to tell, the pond has exactly the same level of skill, respect and experience as a world-leading climate scientist as Moorice Newman, which is to say three fifths of fuck all, and a geography assignment in third year ...

Oh sure, it could be fun. But it's just more of the Moorice's same, and the only reason to pay any attention is that this is the the pond's turf.

Interminable crap regurgitated by the preposterous kool aid slurping commentariat trotted out at regular intervals by the reptiles at the lizard Oz. Like this:

The Golden State's in trouble? Talk about ignoring an inconvenient truth.

Yes, right at this minute, the golden state is in deep shit, but it has something to do with one of the worst droughts on records, and at the moment, the gloom is almost impenetrable, as it's speculated that Snow retreat will worsen California droughts.

By golly that water bill looks serious. Is that why the Californians are listening to climate scientists?

A couple of days ago, the pond was out and about listening to a visiting US expert explain to Bush Telegraph just what deep doo dah the state was in, and you can still listen to that story at Farming land going to waste as United States drought takes hold.

The expert was blathering about exceptional droughts and deep purple droughts, and there are some great graphs out there. This one was put together in July, here:

And despite a bit of recent rain, it hasn't got much better since.

Now Morrice, like Abbott, is a coal lover. But if coal is the solution, and there is no problem, what is the deluded Greg 'Walri' Hunt doing, and why - in this time of budget emergency, of stringent budget criss - is Abbott the shirtfronter allowing his government and Hunt to piss a substantial sum of money against the wall?

Now all the pond can do is commend the impeccable science on display in Maurice's work:

Yes, enough said, because the pond can't think of a single more scientific experiment or exercise, or more damning scientific proof, than an ABC radio poll!

That's the sort of science that has frequently seen the pond captivated, speechless, full of wonder and awe and admiration ...

Oh reptiles you've done it again, what a great lizard rag you run ...

But before we go, let's consider the quality of the feedback that Moorice and his wonderful science produces for the reptiles:

FUCK THE POND DEAD, it's an INTERNATIONAL CONSPIRACY and wouldn't you know, it's EMANATING FROM QEENSLAND ...

Sometimes the pond reckons the pond can judge a piece by the emotions it arouses, and surely Moorice has managed to arouse the BARKING MAD from the DEAD ... and what's worse, THEY TURNED OFF THE fucking SPELL CHECKER ... but it seems the CAPS LOCK was WORKIGN when the deviant, perverted AGENDA was exposed to the world ...

Well that's the comedy gold for the day. No doubt it will get better and better as the day progresses ... so that soon enough, thanks to the reptiles, and Moorice, every day will be better coal-blessed day in every coal-blessed way ...

(Below: and more Cathy Wilcox here)

UPDATE: thanks to a kindly correspondent, the pond has been made aware that Moorice has attracted the attention of the unkindly twitterati. A sampling:

Dunning-Kruger? You can Greg Hunt the Dunning-Kruger effect here, but take care, there might be walri about and their bite at this time of the year is something shocking ...