Monday, March 23, 2020

In which the pond hosts the usual bunch of raving Monday reptiles ...

 

The reptiles let loose the onion muncher late on the weekend, thereby missing the pond deadline …

Apparently in the piece "the contributor" explained how biosecurity and self-reliance was immeasurably improved by the revival of knighthoods, and other bold and brave manufacturing initiatives by the OM's failed government…

Luckily, the pond didn't have to waste time on this dropkick, irrelevant loser, banished from the pond's banner, because Monday always produces fresh reptile meat …

The pond doesn't know how long it will stay open … everything seems to be closing these days … but while the hits are down, the comments section is much livelier, and besides, the pond will relay the best of reptile thinking, so long as it can and so long as there's an expert in the movement of flood waters in quarries to hand ...


The pond should possibly be indignant and take action against the Caterist for breaching the pond's trademark use of "loon", but on the other hand, it does indicate that the loon is unaware of his own status as a genuine loon …

And somehow that is pleasing to the pond, in much the same way that it's pleasing that the Caterist was granted by the reptiles a classic loony offering from Lobbecke, up there with the best of the cult master ...


Now the pond isn't actually going to comment on the Caterist, because there are other fish to fry, and the comments section is now forensically examining the entrails and the tripe ...but how pleasing to see that in the world of the reptiles, they still manage to disavow climate alarmism, and trot out a Croc Dundee cliche …

And so on with the Caterist referencing Polonius referencing their heads up their bums about the ABC and the rest of the usual suspects ...


And there you have it in one simple moronic line - the response to the climate emergency was never about the climate emergency. We're but one short step away from Dame Slap blathering about the UN using climate science to establish a world government by Xmas …

Is there any emergency that the reptiles won't turn to their own ideological benefit? Of course not ...


As the Caterist hints, somewhat ominously, don't think we won't keep on trying to keep the poor buggers very poor, and deny the climate science …

And so to a bold, difficult choice for the pond, with simplistic simpleton Simon sounding enormously brave, and the bouffant one putting Albo in his place ...


A difficult choice?

Not really. The pond can never go past recovering, reformed feminist Oreo … this week out and about, instead of practicing a little isolation, doing an epic China bash ...


Of course the Oreo will immediately disprove the uselessness of that advice, because rather than talk about the local scene, she immediately heads off to China, which is as usual and relevant as the pond holding Vlad the impaler to account for the way he runs Russia … and sadly the not so long ago NYRB piece about assassinations is inside the paywall

Never mind, on we go, with a piece that offers no help to the current situation in the land of Oz ...


Don't expect the recovering, reformed feminist to pause for breath … once she gets on a roll, she knows  how to rabbit on about the usual suspects, because when's an emergency not the right time to do an ideological roll call of zealotry?


Indeed, indeed, but what did Oreo have to say about that scandalous news involving toilet paper?


And to to the pond's last treat for the day, and as always, it's the Major, urging a flattening of the hype curve ...


You know, like the headline in this day's tree killer edition …



The Major has been on this denialist path since a few weeks ago he ended his column with this par, dismissing current events as a mere panic, like other past mere panics ...


And this week it's more of the same … with only the Major full of infinite wisdom, or as they say up Tamworth way, full of it ...


Ah, only the humble Major could scribble that humility is a much undervalued quality, himself being notorious for his astonishing humility, as he explains the shortcomings of almost everybody else around him … in a very humble way, worthy almost of Uriah Heep at his most 'umble ...


This, it has to be said, is what passes for lizard Oz commentary these days ...


Humility? The Major? Uriah Heep?

Creepy? Weird?  A certified, certifiable loon? Let the comments section decide, because the pond just has to find space for this Rowe, with more immortal Rowe here ...


Of course the Meere he's referencing comes from c. 1940 …not that it does anyone any good at the moment to know it's in the NSW Art Gallery … no point rushing off to try and check it out ...


Nor can anyone check out this other holding by the NSW Art Gallery, but luckily for those inside their homes, there's still the internet and a sighting here ...



13 comments:

  1. They don’t ‘do’ irony, do they?

    My source has sent me an item from the Limited News site. I quote -

    ‘Readers can be assured receiving and flicking through the pages of newspapers is still considered safe, according to the World Health Organization.

    Additionally, News Corp Australia - publisher of this paper - is adding extra measures to keep readers and employees safe.

    News Corp’s network of newspaper distributors have been instructed to wear gloves and while most of the production process is automated, employees are undertaking additional sanitising, before and after going to press.’

    I can think of nothing that I need add to that, although there are obvious questions about what News Corp might do for others involved in earlier stages of ‘the production process’.


    Other Anonymous (with thanks to ‘The Source’)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They shouldn't have worried, from what I have seen in airports and cafes, there is little risk the public will touch the News Corps product.

      Delete
    2. I always read the free Murdoch Herald-Sun with my morning coffee and raspberry and white choc muffin, Bef. Can't miss out on Calvin and Hobbes ... and Andrew the Blot twice a week.

      Now, sadly, that's all ended with the coffee shops only allowed to do takeaway, and they don't need to provide free newspapers for that.

      I wonder if libraries are considered "essential services" ? When I asked this morning as I paid some bills, even the Post Office lady didn't know if Post Offices are "essential". Parcel delivery, yes, but the shops ?

      Delete
  2. Hi Dorothy,

    Did you note the effortless segue in the Oreo piece where the recovering feminist went from kicking the greenhouse gas emitting villains of the CCP to sticking the boot into the welfare bludging Greenie communists? Classic!

    Only someone who was “voted one of the top ten smartest people in Australian universities." could have carried out such a seamless transition.

    DiddyWrote

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We are truly privileged to have such a bright one to lead us towards the light, DW.

      Delete
    2. Effortless alright DW. Read me! Read me!.........and if you don’t agree, your a greenie, dole bludging commie loving anti-establishment warmista.
      Did I mention, don’t look at the Govt. even though “speaking truth to power” seems to be the running theme of both the Oreo and the Major this day. Cheers.

      Delete
    3. Ah, the BRI, DW. Is there anything it can't do?

      Delete
  3. Now talking about one-trick ponies (well, somebody was), we have the cantering Cater: "It [the corona-crunch] will, however, restore some sanity to the debate as the centre-left is belted by reality, as Andrews was last week, and the climate emergency argument looks more like a ludicrous overreaction."

    Wau, eh ? "belted by reality" in the person of a nincompoop who owes $1.2million for a brainless, clueless libel which can only be described as "a ludicrous overreaction".

    But then, as I sat in one of my favourite lieus de cafe just before it had to close at midday reading the free copy of the Herald-Sun and there, behold, was Andrew the Blot trumpeting that the coronavirus panic has completely killed the whole climate overreaction.

    So there's that one sad little trick being played again and again and again.

    Then oh my, the Oreo: "It is the bully that plays the victim to avoid accountability."

    Now where would an innocent such as the Oreo have learned that trick ? Where on Earth is that part of the daily bread.

    So then: "In recent weeks, the CCP has gone from denying the existence of the virus to rewriting history."

    So, who learned that trick first, Trump or the CCP ? Or just maybe the Onion Muncher or Goosebumps Cater ? They both practice it readily too.

    Then we get to the Maj Mitch: "The rise of political hate in journalism, often seen in the social media sneering of reporters, is damaging trust in media.."

    Damaging trust in media? How can you damage that which is non-existent ? Well, mostly non-existent, anyway. But what another fine example of reptile "attribution and projection" ("sneering of reporters") yet again.

    And yeah: "This is what passes for journalism today."

    And is the Maj Mitch what passes for a journalist, today ? Apparently he does in the Land of Murdochia. I did enjoy Badham's sensayuma though, even if 'he who passes for a journalist today' didn't get it.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Thanks for publishing these gobbets DP. Reading Cater in particular always makes me feel a bit better about myself. Its probably a bit shameful, like visiting Bedlam to laugh at the lunatics.

    I've noticed this theme that the pandemic somehow negates the climate crisis echoed elsewhere by conservatives. No real argument is made as to how this follows apart from "it's not on the front page anymore".

    Anyway, it seems like the News Corp playbook is updated every few weeks and distributed to all the hacks who dutifully use it until the next iteration arrives. It's a bit like their pantheon of heroes who are quoted reverentially until they are exposed as the tools of big tobacco or it becomes clear they are hopped up to the eyeballs on benzoes, then they discretely disappear.

    ReplyDelete
  5. A Contributer, a Caterist, aka a Mocker, a Dame, a Bro, and a reformed Feminist, all standing by the Kool-Aid fountain, only to find it has been replenished with the ink of humility by the Major.........dark days indeed down in the bunker. :-(

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ls_hnYpT_2s


    ReplyDelete
  6. Hi DP,

    I took a studied punt at the trigger words Lobbecke may have used to create his usual incongruous graphic for the Caterists’s rant and came up with the following -

    Weather vane
    Chicken
    Marxist
    Boxing gloves

    Now, I truly don’t wish to know how his mind works but I am guessing it churns along somewhat like this…

    “Cater mentions weather vanes so that’s my central theme. Most weather vanes are chickens so that’s easy. But hang on – this chicken is a Marxist - how do I portray a Marxist – I know I’ll draw Groucho, he’s a Marxist!”

    So this Marx(ist) chicken has got Groucho’s trademark glasses, but instead of the protruding schnozz he’s sporting half a beak! Not only that, this nasal aberration has miniature arms protruding from its (nostrils?) with cute little boxing gloves attached.

    To add thematic intensity our loony ‘toonist has depicted the mangled contraption as having just been through some kind of storm. Could it be the mighty forces of capitalism have delivered a fatal blow to such paltry leftists?

    Yet again, Slobbecke has missed the whole point of his assigned article. The Caterist is deeply a-feared of upstarts like GetUp. He regards the motives and actions of these left factions as “mercenary” and “ominous”. And he’s mightily worried that they are attacking his good friends - “the capitalist landlord class and their top-hatted banker mates.”

    I could go on about how weather is not climate; that weather vanes are usually silhouettes of roosters not chickens; that weather vanes are thin and flat in order to easily indicate wind direction rather than the aerodynamically challenged monstrosity Lobbecke has dreamed up; that the head looks more like Henry Kissinger than Groucho Marx; and that the chicken in question has no legs, but prolonged inspection of this cartoon chimera is inducing hallucinations reminiscent of Bondi circa 1974.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Nicely analysed, Kez.

      Delete
    2. :)³

      At some point, the pond can see this analysis ending up in a definitive collection of cult master Lobbecke's works …though perhaps then a little more can be said on the connection to Harpo's harp-playing, and the hidden explanation in the image as to why Zeppo Marx was treated so badly ...

      Delete

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