The reptiles were in a state of alarm this day, but the pond decided to creep by quietly, and let the fuss settle …
After all, it was just a few coal lovers getting a little agitated, urged on by Labor.
Besides, the pond had to follow orders and keep an eye out for the spin …
Poor old Bolter, how they've been piling on …
And a little later on, with another Crikey plug for another piece ...
And so on …
The pond wishes it could take the Bolter as seriously as Rundle did, as someone worth a whole article and an argument, but speaking of keeping the eye on the spin, things were still decidedly odd, nay a little weird, in the climate science department of the lizard Oz, not least an anonymous contribution at Cut and Paste …
The pond didn't know what to make of it.
Plimer has been much loved by the reptiles for years. Could they be mocking his comparisons to the creationists?
Luckily there was a lizard Oz cartoon to hand that very day that steered the pond in the right direction:
Plimer was right. The greenies are nothing short of delusional creationists, churchy theologians, staff in hand, though apparently unaware they also needed the shepherd's rod.
Then it seemed to go a little strange again ...
Mother Jones and The Conversation being quoted alongside the heroic Plimer?
The pond thought it would never see the day … and was flooded by nostalgia, and remembering the good times, when Plimer and Dame Slap together hit the denialist road and ended up in a Maitland pub, spreading the good news, the joys of denialism …
Too referential citing the pond from 2009?
Well it's been a decade, and now Plimer is suddenly being linked to Ken Ham and the pond felt an almost biblical sense of the outcast …
Meanwhile, the good news is that Lloydie is back in action, and spreading the word that nothing's happening, nothing's doing …
But why sound indignant? What does it matter? It's only a debate amongst theologians. It's fake science, fake news. The reptiles have told the pond and the good citizens of Maitland so for well over a decade ...
Still, the pond did wonder if SloMo's team was amongst the three ...
Never mind, the pond is sure we have someone capable on hand. A figures fiddler of quality, a figures fiddler who evaded the AFP with a skill journalists might marvel at (as noted in Media Watch last night), a figures fiddler with infinite capacity for deviance and malevolent stupidity ...
Ah yes, the old billy goat butt routine from the figures fiddler. Brave lad, valiantly battling attempts to ban carryover credits, and doing his best to subvert talks in Madrid …
Surely figures fiddling on a world stage beats lying and cheating a Sydney mayor.
And that gave Lloydie a chance to dazzle the readership with his own figures ...
Naturally the readership, lovingly cultivated by the reptiles over the years, were on board. They'd read the runes, and they knew what it all really meant …
And so on and so forth, because the lizard Oz proudly remains home to the religion of denialism, and at some point, the Plimer will surely return, to parade his message for the reptile true believers …
And so to the next topic of the day, and here the pond faced a dilemma, in the form of Dame Groan and Troy …
A free kick at the poor old Ruddster, and Troy calling it for the Donald, and we're only in February?
The pond could only see a cartoon in it … a riff on this …
By golly, in The Times of all places …
Truly, where would we be without the Donald? Keep rooting for him reptiles, keep talking him up Troy, though nobody in the US might give a flying fuck what you think.
Please, make sure we keep the comedy alive. Fucking the planet is a small price to pay for the ongoing pleasuring of the pond ...
But that left the pond in a hole, in a fix, and then a correspondent reminded the pond of a piece it had ignored the day before …
The Caterist!
How could the pond walk past the Caterist? What an outrage!
Sure day-old Caterist scribbling has the stench of rotting prawn heads, but that's what the pond's all about …
Besides, anyone who bothers to head off to the Menzies centre will see that the Caterist is just stealing a few rotting prawns from a comrade in arms …
Never mind, it's on with the Caterist rant, even if he has done a little cribbing ...
Yes, the figures fiddler got off scot-free … even if a few unseemly questions were asked here …
Run wild and free, figures fiddler. There's more fuck-ups to be done, and the pond has a really infinite* (* News 24 licensed) faith in your capacity for fuckery …
But none of this bothered the Caterist, and so to the biggest gobbet of all ...
Dearie me, first kill all the lawyers, as the Caterist frothed and foamed, and became outraged. What about the rights of big tobacco to kill people without pesky questions about their behaviour? Whither asbestos, and all those tricks of the trade, and the skilled work of the asbestos woman, a lawyer acting in a noble cause?
And then there's so many other shonky products foisted on unwitting consumers, and no doubt their manufacturers at this very moment contributing to the Menzies Research Centre … or at least the canny Caterist hoping that they might … because we can't just rely on figures fiddling, we need a Boeing being able to send a few planes into the ground without being bothered by wretched litigation, and greedy lawyers making an unseemly fuss over a few dead bodies … because there has to be a price for business, and if a few stragglers drop out of the herd, it's just the tooth and claw of nature and capitalism ...
Of course the pond's correspondent noted that, apart from the obvious reasons - the quest for big ticket sponsors helping the Menzies Research Centre out with a little cash in the paw - the Caterist had a reason to be testy with lawyers …
Sweet, what a flood in a quarry hoot, and those figures will surely need some fiddling …
And so to the Rowe of the day, and suddenly those coal lovers are done in mine with canary … (with more most excellent Rowe here …)
How crooked are the federal police that they cannot take action against a liberal. But will chase down any journalist who reports on the liberal party crooks.
ReplyDeleteWhat this tells me is that the federal police are an arm of the coalition.
If we look at the previous police chief he is on a retainer for the murray darling commission. It looks like payment for his loyalty to the cause.
You got that right WW. I find it infuriating that this Govt. appears to be pure Teflon, but I knew the game was dodgy when the PM moved in with the AFP and started appointing military types into sundry choice places and stacking every public authority with yes men, as well as inviting every low life reptile hack over for drinkies.
DeleteAnd Scottyfrommarketing continues with the game of mates in appointing Colvin to oversee the bushfire recovery.
A fucking huge game of mates! Cheers.
https://johnmenadue.com/jack-waterford-afp-needs-a-leader-who-is-a-character-with-character-not-a-bureaucrat-with-opinions-canberra-times-20-7-2019/
P.S....lest we forget the Slipper saga.
On behalf of Plimer: "..:runaway global warming when atmosphere CO2 was hundreds of times higher than it is now"
ReplyDeleteIt's about 400 parts per million (ppm) now so "hundreds of times" higher would make it at least 200x400 =80,000ppm. If it ever reached anywhere within parsecs of that, this planet would have long before turned into Venus.
In case, like me, you haven't been keeping up with the latest webspeak, then you may want to know that 511 Mt CO2-e means 511 Megatons of CO2-equivalent (ie other GHGs expresses as an equivalent amount of CO2).
But then we get to Goosebumps Cater: "Reversing that decision [Bowen's exemption bill] may check the forward march of the self-intere3sted litigators who have become a blight on our democracy."
Well, they've certain;y become a blight on Cater's "democracy". Who would have thought that telling lies in public about floods and things would deliver out Nick into the ravages of "lawfare". Especially when he loses.
We don’t need no stinkin’ mathematics around here GB.
DeleteRe your other post.....the Pond sure is a neat little time capsule of political and journalistic loonies. Cheers.
Janet Albrechtsen, Ian Plimer, good honest rustic folk, evil inner city conspirators and the climate change debate
ReplyDeleteWell, that was a fine walk down memory lane, DP. Good old Ian Plimer, once a Skeptic until he too became a "victim of Lawfare". And truly, Dame Slap hasn't learned a thing, or moved a millimetre, in all the years since then.
It took me a while though to 'remember' Paul Sheehan and his miracle water, but Christopher Pearson ? Greg Melleuish ? Both at one with yesterday's sev'n thousand years. But Hugh Denton - the lawfare man ?
Hope you'll do an occasional bit of reminiscing like that; it brings back so many fine memories.