Friday, September 11, 2015

We stopped the boats of climate scientists ...

With the fearless leader in all sorts of trouble, including but not limited to leadership tilts, cabinet reshuffles, Terrorists breaking ranks with talk of restlessness, Pacific islanders, exotic shirts, and strange stares at Mearesy's camera, it was way past time for the reptiles to sound the alert, create mischief and uncertainty, arouse saucy doubts and fears, and solve the problem of climate change all in a single keyboard stroke by that master of the art, Graham Lloyd:

Dangerous climate change?

What tosh.

Lloydie is on hand to sort it all out:

You see, you bloody alarmists, with your short term climate scares and your inadequate science and your blather about dire consequences.

The southern ocean is on hand to sort out everything out.

What's that you say? More carbon dioxide might lead to even more fear-mongering about ocean acidification?

Oh you nervous nellies with your softening shells, harden up or better still, why not turn into some kind of polychaete worm and frolic freely amongst cooling CO2 vents.

Sit back and relax, and after all the soothing noises, what's the bet that Lloyd will drop in a couple of lines from others, just to show that he's really terribly balanced ...

Oh by the way, the GWPF is a UK think tank funded by climate denialist Nigel Lawson - you can Desmog it here.

It is therefore an utterly reliable source of scientific excellence, and where the reptiles go to for their excellent science reporting.

While the pond appreciates the effort, it is equally happy to report that it's thankfully entirely unnecessary, because the PM's office has come up with an excellent response in relation to climate science, and there's not a hint of that dreadful "crap" word in it:

Noting that today's meeting on Syrian refugees was running a bit late, Mr Dutton remarked that it was running to "Cape York time", to which Mr Abbott replied "we had a bit of that up in Port Moresby". Mr Dutton then added "time doesn't mean anything when you're about to have water lapping at your door". 
The Immigration Minister later described the exchange as a "private conversation". 
It was held beneath a large television microphone on a three-metre-long boom pole above the MPs' heads.

Laugh, well you've just got to laugh at the thought of all those islanders running around while the water laps at their doors ...

Oh and here's another item found on Twitter. The pond only runs it because it irritates the reptiles so ...


  1. We are ruled by loudmouthed comedians.How the Island nations laughed!

  2. My fave on twitter so far.And so soon after Border Farce.

  3. If i were a christian, i would do everything i could to make sure i went to heaven. Why? Because Abbott, Dutton and Morrison are most definately going to hell. And imagine eternity with those as*holes.

    1. You know this? How? Have you checked your sources? I suggest you read Robert A. Heinlein's Job: A Comedy of Justice

      "The God of the Old Testament is arguably the most unpleasant character in all fiction: jealous and proud of it; petty, unjust,unforgiving control-freak; a vindictive, bloodthirsty ethnic cleanser; a misogynistic, homophobic, racist, infanticidal, genocidal, filicidal, pestilential, megalomaniacal, sadomasochistic, capriciously malevolent bully." - Richard Dawkins forgot there to mention Jah's narcissistic self-regarding obsessive monopolistic control in the old publishing world, Jah's publications distorted spin... Be careful what you wish for, check Heinlein for the full deal on Heaven and Hell and what arbitrates any Investor State Dispute Settlement between the two ;)

    2. I agree with you anon about the nature of the god of the old testament but I'd be very worried about taking any information that the madman Robert Heinlein was promulgating. He is real bad barking mad. Started out and ok hippie libertarian but he went the full monty in terms of his adoption of this fantastical cult that based on other just as sick making patriarchal notions of white male superiority.

      Try Thomas Paine for a more rational account of the foolishnesses in the bible and in the other one god documents.

  4. There is a little-performed short ballet by the underrated English composer Arthur Bliss - Adam Zero. The music is excellent (if you like mid- 20th C English romantic music, and the choreography was by our own Robert Helpmann, circa 1946.

    The ballet is an allegory of the cycle of man’s life; the world in which he lives is represented by a stage on which a ballet is being created: Adam is cast as the principal dancer, Omnipotence is represented by the Stage Director and Adam’s Fates by the Designer, Wardrobe Mistress and Dresser.

    Adam falls in love, marries, and achieves power, but his triumph is brief; his world crumbles about him, he is stripped of his glory, and a new generation (Understudy) takes his place. He seeks distraction in dissipation but everyone deserts him and he is left alone to face Death.

    It's only 10 minutes long and worth listening to.

    Rather appropriate to the situation of Mr. Abbott.

  5. What a honk! Drum opinion by honking loon Peter Smith.

    "With this record and more weighing down the Labor Party, and with the pedestrian Bill Shorten in charge, occupying a policy-free zone, Tony Abbott should have been a shoo-in for a second term.

    What the heck has and is going wrong?"

    1. Smith's opening is a cracker!

      "The Abbott Government has a far better record than its Labor predecessor, but in politics these days successes don't make up for mistakes."

  6. Ms Pond
    ScoMo and his mob speaking in tongues to schoolchildren.
    And we discuss if the religious belief of a representative is "relevant".

    1. No comments attached to that article Miss PP. Shame, no nutjobs screaming 'how's this different to Gayby Baby?'

  7. Some comments from Pacific Islander friends about Dutton's weak attempt at sarcasm.


    This cheap sniggering by 3 men who do not deserve to hold Ministerial office is not joking - it is denial and racism, pure, simple.

    The PM and Dutton manage to insult Muslim leaders, Aborigines and Pacific Island leaders in just 23 seconds

    Our pacific neighbours' survival is not a joke @TonyAbbottMHR. The idea that your govt takes global warming srsly is (a joke)

    A most apposite Peter Broelman cartoon in today's Sunshine Coast Daily. Note the cheeky redesign of Abbott's shirt

  8. What does Grahams graph actually tell us? In 2012, the Southern Ocean absorbed 0.4 somethings more than at some other time. T'riffic, Greybags, but what does it mean?

    What it actually means is 9/10ths of bugger all....

    The somethings on this graph are moles of CO2. Moles are units used a a lot in chemistry and nowhere else, but the thing to know here is that for CO2, one mole equals 44 grams. So the Southern Ocean soaked up an additional ~18 (0.4 x 44) grams of CO2 per square metre in 2012 compared to their baseline period (which appears to be 1982 to ~1998). The Southern Ocean is 20.3 million square kilometres, so in all it soaked up an additional 358 million tons of CO2.

    Which would be great, were it not for the fact that over that same period, global CO2 emissions rose by 10,000 million tons (from ~25 Gt CO2e to ~35 Gt CO2e). So the Southern Ocean, "the giant lung", managed to soak up 3.6% of the additional emissions. Some of the rest went into other oceans, some into plants, but most of it stayed in the atmosphere.

    But...3.6%! Phew! Crisis averted...Take that, alarmists!

    What a bozo.

    1. Phew indeed. Thanks for the explainer, Frank.

    2. The graph is going up, Frank. That's all that matters!

  9. O.K.,it's official. We are ruled by the reptile people.
    Apologies for being off topic DP. What a Friday like no other.

  10. TGIF. Brandis appoints Rebecca Weisser to the board of the Australia Council.

    The libs present a full flush on lucky Friday.

    Some background -

    1. Just look at her twitter feed to see who she is.


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