Let us start with a reading, a checking of the runes:
The Bolter, the man who follows men with no necks and the Parrot in the same camp with the Billistas!
But herding reptiles is infinitely harder than herding cats and some of the reptiles, most notably the Bolter, are bitter, surly and disconsolate.
The Bolter has surely discovered a new river of bile:
And the Bolter was at one with the Terrorists:
Oh yes, and even the ABC worships at the feet of a tin pot false god:
There might be nothing left but a retreat into the apocalyptic fury of a Tim Storrier painting, and a rich fantasy life:
Never mind, the pond has its own problems with Malware, not least the way he became the Albert Speer of the NBN, doing what his leader demanded - trash the joint - and now turning up in Has Malcolm Turnbull changed his mind on the NBN? (with forced video)
But enough of these petty problems, because callooh callay, oh frabjous day, today is Caterist day, and he too is concerned about any possible notion that there might be the slightest hint of a tilt to the left, or even a move towards fibre:
What a great pitch, and inevitably the pond was drawn like a moth to the flame of welter, the lather of insights:
This will not stand, this cannot be accepted.
Why it was only two years ago that Abbott rejected the pieties of the insipid Fairfaxians, and look how well that turned out, look how he punished the cognitive elite for their wretched dissonance.
Yep, the Caterists, dewy eyed, are fondly looking through their tears at the past, and how great and golden the lost age was ...
But how can that be?
You know, the bit about the Coalition appealing to people who work in the private sector, while Labor is the choice of those who rely on the public purse for their income through occupation or welfare?
'Tis passing strange. Are the Caterists determined Labor voters?
Well it so happens that the think tank fronted by the Caterists has in the past relied on the public purse for a substantial slice of its income, and in grant form too, thank you very much, with no need to repay anything indecent like an entrepreneurial loan.
Never mind, let's hear it for the creationists ...
Ah, the Joe the plumber solution to everything, including but not limited to the plumbing.
Sadly, the won't someone think of the plumber refrain leaves the pond with absolutely no common ground to be found with a sneering Caterist, with his paws deep into the public purse while mocking the godless ghettos of inner-city Sydney. Give the pond a handsome government stipend, a generous grant, and it would probably line up to do the mocking too ...
But if it takes a million smackeroos or more to get a two bedroom semi, someone's mucked up on the definition of ghetto for the sake of a mindless bit of alliteration ... and if wanting something better than copper is a quest for Shangri-La, then the pond must keep on with the dreaming ...
Happily, there's also zero common ground between the Bolter and the filthy rich Point Piper dwelling Malware, who could buy a Tim Storrier or three if he wanted to, and possibly has ...
Meanwhile, the pond can look forward to a new age of warfare.
Reptile on reptile, and the Caterists encouraging class divisions and exploiting the age of anxiety and fears, celebrating the creationists and the plumbers and demonising the atheists and the gays and the inner city 'leets, and mocking the aspirational desire to get a university degree for perhaps a tad less than a $100k ... because all that worked out terribly well for Tony Abbott ...
Poor old Julian Clarke. Not a clue, and not a clue that one of the key ways forward to improving economic performance might have been to embrace the digital age ... instead wrecked and laid waste to by big Mal in his desire to caterist to the bidding of Chairman Rupert and his minion Tony Abbott and all the other Caterist luddites around yearning for the age of Menzies ...
There's an irony in all this, and having just upgraded the house to Cat 6 cable, some day the pond might discover it ... but not just yet, because speed inside the house is linked to the speed outside the house provided by Optus.
Let the search for Shangri-La continue ... are you on the line, Shangri-La?