The pond was in a state of wild excitement.
Would the rest of the pack of hounds pick up on the story of Abbott the war monger this tabloid Sunday, or would they go to water?
Was it just one rabid dog in the pack, frothing and foaming at the mouth?
Would the pond have to settle for the tweets too far, the link to Abbott's war movie hashtag, thoughtfully provided by a reader and available here.
That one's not far off the mark. The warrior has regularly shown his military style:
Careful, it's gone off like a bomb:
Sadly, it seems that the rest of the pack have left it to the rabid dog to do the work, but that dog still has a bit of bite, a canny capacity to nip at the heels of the user of weasel words like "formal" and "fanciful":
Uh huh. Where does that leave the Bolter calling foul?
Well actually it leaves the Bolter in a state of despair, but that despair's all about another leak.
Look, there on the top right of the page, you can just see the yarn:
Oh no, not the HUN, not the home of the Bolter.
Let's zoom in a little. ECU please, DOP:
The story itself is pretty much what might be expected from Mr. Fairness and his crew - a concern about their own necks, and avoiding looking like they'd broken yet another election promise, compounded with a desire to protect the wealthy, and instead inflict the maximum amount of pain on everyone:
Yes, jolly Joe was in on the caper too.
But the real point of the yarn comes in the third par.
"In another stunning leak from the nation's most powerful cabinet committee ..."
The rats are now working with a giant sieve, and however you look at it, Abbott is toast, dead meat walking ...
Which brings the pond back to the Bolter, now in a deep funk.
Oh it's vicious sabotage alright, betrayers, smearers, exaggerators, traitors, treacherous back stabbers and rat finks.
And worst of all, it's being done by and with the Murdoch rags ... and if big Malaise gets the gig, the fight back from the far right ratbags will be something to behold ...
This is, to borrow a phrase, the best of times, and the best of times ...
Raptors feuding over turf, and the black knight mortally wounded ...
It means today will be a day of relaxation and merriment at the pond, as we now wait on Monday, and that promised trip into the bunker ...
Yes, the pond will be taking the tour inside the bunker, just before the fearless leader seizes the moment to pound the drums of paranoia and xenophobia, whipping up fear, anger and hatred by blathering on about national security...
... though if you pause a moment to reflect, it hardly seems necessary.
He's already achieved his goal:
That story, with links, is at the Graudian here.
Naturally the likes of the Bolter are wildly indignant.
The Islamic barbarian hordes are gathering at the gates, and we're all doomed, doomed I tells ya ...
Luckily, there's a simple answer.
We need to put the country on a war footing.
Thank the long absent lord there's a natural leader to hand, a genuine Churchillian, robust and willing to do the hard yards, with a solid team behind him.
Don't worry about munitions and ordnance and kit. That's all in hand:
Now let's get on with the party: