"What fresh hell can this be?", to conscript a possibly real quote from the real Dorothy Parker.
Thursday in the lizard Oz is always a special form of hell, but to mangle the quote into discernible reality, it should have read "what stale hell can this be?"
There was petulant Peta, top of the world ma on the digital far right of the lizard Oz, sounding triumphantly Pauline...
New research reveals voters have shifted right on immigration and other key issues, backing Liberal leader Angus Taylor’s focus on protecting Australian values
By Peta Credlin
Columnist
As stale as the onion muncher blathering on about the Judaeo-Xian tradition.
No need to recycle the hate, fear mongering, bigotry and dog whistling, the intermittent archive can take care of that ...
Spoiler alert, the pond ruins the ending, as the petulant one sounded triumphant in her final flourish ...
Quite apart from the fact that the Liberals in 2025 inexplicably failed to campaign for their energy policy or against Labor’s unrealised capital gains tax policy, plus failed to hammer the fact that government policy had exacerbated the worst fall in living standards in the developed world, the key factors in their humiliation were the collapse of TV in shaping people’s political perceptions, the rise of social media (in which the Coalition was largely MIA) and antipathy towards Dutton who, however unfairly, the study showed had the least voter appeal in its history.
Far from needing to persuade the Australian public that migration numbers are too high and that all migrants must accept Australian values, what this says to me is that on immigration, Taylor is pushing on an open door. Based on the best available data, promising to protect the Australian way of life is exactly what voters want – as well as what our country needs, as the Bondi massacre has put up in flashing neon lights.
Meaning that far from being too right-wing for the electorate, for the first time in years the Liberals are actually taking voters where they want to go.
In short, and in essence, go on beefy boofhead from down Goulburn way, go the full Pauline, go in hard, boots and all, rage at furriners, take the hate ball from her and run with it up the guts...
Why is this deeply ironic?
At this very moment, even Barners was trying to hide ... in plain sight, in a lizard Oz EXCLUSIVE.
‘What are you asking me for?’: Joyce swerves from Hanson
Barnaby Joyce has refused to endorse his leader Pauline Hanson’s broad criticism of Muslims, in the first sign of division within the new One Nation team.
By Greg Brown and Elizabeth Pike
That's more than enough of that from Tamworth's enduring, ineradicable shame, but you could have knocked the pond over with a feather when the Canavan caravan joined in the cock-crowing chorus ...
(In view of the Graudian's desire to extort email addresses, here's an intermittent archive link)
And Brownie took to the extreme far right of the hive mind to cry to the clouds, even though petulant Peta was posing as Pauline in drag ...
Hanson shows conservative voters her true colours with Islam smear
Hanson’s latest controversy is hardly surprising given her record over a 30-year political career, but it carries far more weight given the extraordinary rise in One Nation’s popularity.
By Greg Brown
Chief political correspondent
It was only a two minute read, and Brownie ended with a note of caution.
It seems that, thanks to the likes of petulant Peta egging on the fuss - let's not forget the beefy boofhead from down Goulburn way trying to match the mutton Dutton's electorial triumph - Pauline will thrive:
New Liberal leader Angus Taylor has made a solid start in moving to win back the Coalition’s conservative base without veering into the same rhetoric of Hanson, arguing migrants need to support Australian values and making the point that most do.
Anthony Albanese’s tough language on ISIS brides this week is perhaps a sign he is aware of the need to reassure voters he is putting Australians first, given Hanson’s resurgence. The major parties have historically served Australia well and both Labor and the Coalition must ensure they are responding to the concerns of voters or there is every chance One Nation will continue to thrive.
What else? Well the headlines were all about the ISIS issue, but a 'toon will take care of that ...
Only Jack the Insider bothered to take a dive into the Trumpenstein sewers ...
From British ambassadors to tech billionaires, the Epstein files reveal an extraordinary roster of influential figures who crossed moral lines to socialise with a convicted child abuser.
By Jack the Insider
Columnist
Jack did an incredible job ... of avoidance.
Jack's singular success, his astonishing achievement?
Many names were mentioned, and yet when the pond did a word search for King Donald, there was nary a single mention. It's there in the intermittent archive for anyone wanting to check ...
Not one ... and yet ...
Well played Jack, your kissing cousins at Faux Noise are likely full of admiration and feel free to swim in the sewer with them, you won't smell a a thing ...
What else? Well the pond has already had the pleasure of seeing the weird spectacle of freedumb boy promoted to a pay grade above his level, and there he was in the lizard Oz ...
Top income tax rate ‘punitive’, Wilson declares
The Coalition’s new Treasury spokesman Tim Wilson argues the nation’s economic settings need a ‘complete reset’.
By Greg Brown
Bold?
Just look how startled he looks in that wretched graphic illustration at the top of the "save the filthy rich" yarn, typical of the decline and fall of the lizard Oz graphics department ...
That's more than enough of that. The intermittent archive can take what's left of the little remaining.
But do pause to admire that look. It says he doesn't quite believe where he's landed, and the pond couldn't believe it either.
Perhaps it was an ancient reflex, inherited from ancient stone age times, but the pond found it completely implausible ... though to be fair, freedumb boy was looking after the rich ...
Once again the immortal Rowe was present with a prescient portrait, if inclined to be a tad cruel ...(the pond simply couldn't bear to note the rat tail details in those in and out trays, or the beefy boofhead at the door, seemingly interrupted in mid-consort with a redhead).
The major surprise? How little attention the reptiles paid to that other scandal, one right down their jihad alley but surprisingly absent at the top of the digital edition ...
Never mind, if the pond wants a denunciation of the satanic Jimbo, it will always turn to a beloved professional, one with a cult following amongst pond correspondents ...
The header: Jim Chalmers’ mowing your grass: real wages shrink while the Treasurer talks them up. It’s becoming increasingly clear that the Anthony Albanese government’s economic strategy is heading off the rails.
The caption for the miscreant, looking all smirky and shifty, caught on the hop in the snap: Treasurer Jim Chalmers at a news conference in Logan in Brisbane’s south on Wednesday after the national wages data was released. Picture: Adam Head
It's only becoming clear now that we're heading off the rails?
Hasn't the old chook been groaning about how we'll all be 'rooned for months and months? Did she have little faith in her prognostications?
Bizarrely, considering it was a heralding of disaster of train crash proportions, Dame Groan could only muster three minutes for this assault.
Apart from celebrating her evocation of Winnie, there's no need to put a gloss on it, what with the Groaning being very standard and best left to pond correspondents ...
The fastest-growing sector for wages was health and social assistance. For the December quarter, public and private wages grew at the same pace. But over the year, public wages growth significantly outstripped private sector wages. In fact, public sector wages have been outstripping private gains for some time.
According to the Treasurer, Jim Chalmers, the result was a tad disappointing, but it had been worse under the Coalition – that is, if the figures are very carefully cherrypicked. There must come a time when Chalmers gives up the faux, odious comparisons with the performance of the previous government that was voted out nearly five years ago. But just not now. Jimbo is the living and breathing example of that famous saying of Winston Churchill: “Success is stumbling from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm.”
How could the pond resist? Come on down Winnie, sock it to the pond:
Quote Origin: Success Is Going from Failure to Failure Without Losing Your Enthusiasm
Inter alia ...
Thanks honest Abe, and the pond moved to the rest of the groaning with a full loss of enthusiasm ...
Generous award increases granted by the Fair Work Commission as well as substantial pay rises in agreements for public sector workers would set the pace for higher real wages. The fact that productivity has gone backwards since the election of the Labor government in 2022 is seen as largely irrelevant.
But we need only look at what’s been happening to unit labour costs – real unit labour costs rose by 1.5 per cent, according to the most recent National Accounts (September quarter 2025) – to understand why the Reserve Bank is worried about what is going on in the labour market and the inflationary pressures that are around.
Of course, Anthony Albanese, is working from the same talking points as Jimbo. He declared last year that the period of high inflation was over and it was plain-sailing from that point – oops, spoke too soon.
He’s not having a bar of the patently obvious proposition that government spending is contributing to the uptick in inflation – and the associated fall in real wages – and objects to anyone making the obvious point. Evidently, former RBA governor Phil Lowe is so yesterday’s man that we shouldn’t take any notice of his warnings on the dangers of excess government spending.
The reptiles did provide one visual interruption, but it was only that mystifying message that haunts the reptile pages like a Sydney cockroach, or rat tails in the in-tray ...
It was but a brief, entirely meaningless pause as Dame Groan headed into triumphantly teary gloom, as she always does ...
If he had been paying attention to last week’s Senate estimates (and Senator Paterson’s grilling of Finance Minister Katy Gallagher) he would have realised that this is a gross figure and the net figure entails additional spending of more than $114bn. There has been some reallocation of spending, but overall, the public sector is pumping more dollars in and adding to aggregate demand.
The labour market is looking decidedly unbalanced. Too many unnecessary or low-value jobs being created in the public sector or funded by the taxpayer. Public sector wages being driven up by fiat – think childcare and aged care workers. Difficulties for private sector firms, particularly small ones, recruiting staff and being forced to increase pay offers to attract anyone. Rising rates of business failure. All up, a recipe for low productivity, inflationary pressures and higher interest rates.
This was never a good plan by the government, and it looks as though it will end in tears.
Oh yes, we'll all be 'rooned ...
And so to end with with a note on the Streisand effect, and a host that YouTube's sub-titling insists should be known as Colbear.
When the pond last checked, Colbear's interview with Rep Talarico had garnered c. 6.183 million views on YouTube.
Colbear's usual ratings in his time slot?
Last quarter 2025 the show averaged 2.42 million...
Well played CBS lawyers, well played Bari's team...
And so slowly, inexorably FTA TV drives itself into oblivion to conform to the wishes of the demented, 'second childhood' King.
The Streisand effect always puts the pond in a good mood, despite Wilcox's insistence that the pond ends this day's reptile observations on a downer and a bummer. Are you listening Jack?
My Peta Fuk'd Check
ReplyDeletePeta Not Credlinable (disrespect), purveyor of
"what stale hell can this be?".
I'll go with the 1906 the editorial page of a newspaper in Anaconda, Montana.
This is a Peta "warmed-over hell" Not Credlinable unfresh hell;
"But journalism proverbially is fertile in expedients and when there is no fresh hell to serve, it does the next best thing and dishes up some warmed-over hell. The associated press, for instance, sends along about 10,000 words a night. Rain or shine, in war or peace, in time of excitement or period of world-wide stagnation and dullness, along come the 10,000 well-edited words a night."
~ 1906 the editorial page of a newspaper in Anaconda, Montana
https://quoteinvestigator.com/2017/10/01/fresh/#368844fd-2228-4934-b4dd-c36e154debd8
"Standard of Living by Country 2026
Country
Quality of Life Numbeo2025↓
Quality of Life (US News)2025
Quality of Life Score (CEO World)2025
Qualityof Life Rank (US News)2022
Luxembourg218.2061.7092.52
Netherlands216.5085.6095.707th
Denmark215.10100.0096.922nd
Oman215.108.8080.7770th
Switzerland210.9096.5097.905th
Finland208.3090.0095.128th
Norway199.2094.3097.874th
Iceland198.0058.0097.47
Austria197.7078.8092.5011th
Germany195.2088.7096.549th
Australia195.1088.1095.786th
New Zealand194.7081.5093.7410th
Sweden192.2099.9097.283rd
United States
...
https://worldpopulationreview.com/country-rankings/standard-of-living-by-country
Hell hath no fury like a Petulant Peta In-Credlin disrespectful misinforming "warmed-over hell".
Newscorose scribblers have all, and first to undergo the "Surgically Assisted Rapid Palatal Expansion", or SARPE procedure. Is Peta Maxxing inCredlin...
ReplyDelete"Apricotmaxxing isn’t difficult. The techniques are well established; they’re just not very pleasant. With willpower and meditation you can suppress the pharyngeal reflex and get another apricot in there, maybe even two, but all that mental bullshit will only get you so far. Are you serious about this? Do you want to spend your life dithering in the fat central slice of the standard distribution, like every other loser? Don’t you know that when the great bifurcation comes, all the ordinary people will be rendered down into biofuel to power Elon Musk’s infinite child porn generator? Want to avoid that? Then you need to expand your jaw. If you’re trying to fit more apricots in there the only way is to expand your jaw. The procedure is called Surgically Assisted Rapid Palatal Expansion, or SARPE. As you might know, there are two bones above the roof of your mouth, which slowly come together and fuse during adolescence. In a SARPE procedure, the surgeon cuts through the palate and pries them open again. Then, orthodontics are fitted with a spring across the width of the mouth to gently push the bones apart. If you can get a surgeon to perform SARPE, that’s great. If not, there are other options. You can do it yourself. You can put a butter knife in your mouth, gently find the line where the maxillary bones meet, and in one smooth motion push it upwards into your skull.
...
"The twenty-first century is going to be a century of the maxxer. It won’t take many maxxers to make a century; when you drag yourself to the absolute furthest point in a distribution tail you leave a lot of turbulence in your wake. The twentieth century was a century of the masses, class and ethnic conflicts, nationalism and the great contests of history. The realist novel, the personal essay, the strip-mining of ordinary life for patterns and insights. Our century will not make nearly as much sense. All of us will be held hostage to the obsessions of a small group of mentally deranged and self-destructive freaks.
...
"Already it’s crowded out by screeching eroticised resentment. Brief storms of interpretative fury. The future will not understand itself. There’s only one way to escape the magnetic chaos that’s coming, and live in a world that still holds together. You need to start maxxing yourself. You need to find a principle, any principle, and destroy yourself for it. How many apricots do you think you can fit in your mouth?
https://samkriss.substack.com/p/the-century-of-the-maxxer
DP, Pondians, how do you rate above article compared to Dorothy Parker please?
Dame Groan’s use of an apocryphal Churchill / Lincoln quote made me think that, now that Larry David’s “Curb Your Enthusiasm” has ended, its theme (“Frolic” by Luciano Michelini) might provide some musical accompaniment to her musings -
ReplyDeletehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ag1o3koTLWM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c-fUGBfJHCY
The Petulant One -
ReplyDelete>>New research reveals voters have shifted right on immigration and other key issues, backing Liberal leader Angus Taylor’s focus on protecting Australian values>>
So “Australian values” are synonymous with right wing views and prejudices? It was always pretty obvious that was the Credlin / Abbott world view, but I suppose it’s nice to have confirmation.
Speaking of the Dynamic Duo, I wonder what part she may be playing in the Onion Muncher’s latest attempted political comeback?
A little supplement on Tim Wilson, as The Shadow, courtesy of Rachel Withers, on Crikey this day (and they do encourage sharing) -
ReplyDelete"Capital gains tax reform represents the first big test of this “reformed” Liberal Party, as a clear marker of the unfairness that has come to define our tax system.
Of course, I would say that, as a bleeding heart lefty. But what might surprise you is that Wilson has previously said it too. Much has been made of the fact — both within the Coalition and by Jim Chalmers — that Wilson once (six years ago) wrote a book arguing for “intergenerational justice” in the tax system, in which he lamented the preferential taxing of passive income."
Tim's book, published by Connor Court (of course) apparently is still available through regular book suppliers (mine says 'on order, allow 2-3 weeks for confirmation. But $42 for 'The New Social Contract: Renewing the liberal vision for Australia' - and I have been careful in transcribing the case of letters in spelling that title - nah, so many other books ahead of it for my money, and time)
The header rather said it all ...
Delete‘Hope is on the way’: Is Tim Wilson the worst possible pick for shadow treasurer?
Tim Wilson, who led the Coalition campaign against franking credit changes, represents the kind of neoliberalism the Liberal Party needs to move away from. On some level, he knows that.
And yes, if you hand over your email address, you do get limited access, a more honest approach than the Graudian demanding one with menaces ...
Finally, a shadow treasurer focused on aspiration — his own, that is.
Former IPA policy director and the member for Goldstein Tim Wilson is the most eyebrow-raising appointment of Liberal leader Angus Taylor’s new cabinet, having been elevated despite supporting Sussan Ley in Friday’s spill. He joins relatively unknown conservative Claire Chandler in Finance, with Taylor having mostly promoted members of the right, such as Andrew Hastie and Jacinta Nampijinpa Price, while demoting Ley loyalists such as Paul Scarr, Alex Hawke and Melissa Price.
Taylor had good reason to promote the ambitious, “unembarrassable” Wilson to the Treasury portfolio, even if it meant elevating a potential rival (and inflating his dangerously large ego even further). Wilson, the libertarian energiser bunny, was instrumental in the 2019 campaign against Labor’s much-needed changes to franking credits (the “retiree tax” as he dubbed it) and, more recently, to taxes on large super balances.
He’ll certainly be a more effective shadow treasurer than Taylor was, especially as the Liberals gear up to tear down any changes to the capital gains tax (CGT) discount — which Liberal deputy Jane Hume had already indicated they would. Wilson is no doubt going to create headaches for Treasurer Jim Chalmers on this, especially if he spooks the skittish prime minister, who has a record of folding at the first sign of pushback.
Wilson made it clear on Tuesday night that he was ready to start misrepresenting this one too.
“Jim is pushing for a new housing tax, I’m interested in how to lower income tax,” he claimed of reports that Chalmers will try to limit investor tax discounts, which currently grant a 50% discount on taxes paid on capital gains for things like property sales and shares — in order to pay for income tax cuts.
It’s extremely on brand for Tim Wilson to frame a reduction in a tax concession for the well-off as a “new tax”, as he has done with Labor’s other attempts at rebalancing reform.
But is this what the Liberal Party needs right now? Between Hume and Wilson, supposed “moderates” who also happen to be aggressive free-marketeers, the opposition looks set to continue down its neoliberal path, more obsessed with protecting the powerful from nasty taxes than in any kind of fair and functioning market.
And so on ....
Freedumb boy hopes, in...
Delete"The final, gloomy, hypothesis... that [he is] right, and that we are proving the wisdom of HL Mencken’s observation that “No one in this world, so far as I know … has ever lost money by underestimating the intelligence of the great masses of the plain people” (put more succinctly by PT Barnum as “there’s a sucker born every minute”).
https://www.theguardian.com/business/commentisfree/2026/feb/19/coles-shameless-down-down-promotions-have-been-exposed-so-why-arent-they-even-trying-to-rebuilt-trust
Greg Brown: "...jettison the timid approach of Peter Dutton's leadership."
ReplyDeleteFascinating ! So the Lib annihilation was because of Dutton's timidity. Huu'd a thunk it.
Apparently he was just a milksop, a snowflake, a scaredy cat too afraid to nuke the country and be a culture war warrior. 🙀🙀🙀 Who knew?
Delete
DeleteAs W C Fields put it, “Don't be a luddy-duddy! Don't be a mooncalf! Don't be a jabbernowl!" (from that great movie 'The Bank Dick')
I wish people at The Oz would follow another of his remarks "If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There's no point in being a damn fool about it."
So while The Shadow (Tim) tells us that someone at $190 000 will not feel incentive to seek more, because of the next tax rate, the Dame drops one of her many 'jus' sayins' - suggesting that paying workers in child care and aged care a little more is pointing the nation off the rails.
ReplyDeleteSomeone collecting $190 000 a year, keeps $138 363 after tax. The recent increments for aged-care workers - the people who will be looking after the aged rellies, yes, of the Dame's readers - deliver between $31 and $39 (gross) an hour. That top rate is for a team leader - middle management in most aged-care institutions, public or private. For coarse comparison, the person on $190 000 a year - and at that level, it is seldom cited as hourly equivalent - for 40 hours a week at the workplace, collects $91 an hour, gross.
If either The Shadow, or the Dame, were to put their 'analyses' into terms of what people actually earn in Australia - which they seldom do - they might consider sources like the Grattan Institute's analyses of ATO figures. Grattan expected that nearly 90% of people who filed a tax return in 2024-5 year would report taxable income less than $135 000, with a marginal rate of 30%, or less.
But, as ever, The Shadow and the Dame have to write to their little band of readers, and what's the morning cuppa without a grumble and a groan? Certainly that is not Rupert's business plan.