Steal the Terror ... before the terror steals you ...

(Above: found in the streets of Newtown).

The pond would once upon a time have been shocked by that clarion cry to steal and burn the Daily Terror ...

At least until Janet Albrechtsen wrote an impassioned plea for fare evasion as the best way to get ahead in politics and life.

Become a leaner, she furiously scribbled.

Evade a fare, avoid the legitimate demands of a train conductor, and soon enough you might become PM of Australia, or at least get to Budapest.

So that's where zero tolerance ended up ...

Meanwhile, the Daily Terror itself is in fine fear-mongering form:

The resemblance to Elmer Gantry and other fundamentalist preachers shouting "evil is among us" is astonishing.

Throw the phrase into the googleator, and up comes the Mormons screaming about pornography, in A tragic evil among us. It's also the title of a book about the murder of two Mormon missionaries, Greg Hunt it here.

The problem of course is when one set of fundamentalist ratbags (the Murdochians) start using fundie religious language to describe another bunch of fundamentalist ratbags (the Islamics), we're in the middle of a religious war, with the Murdochians posing as the Crusaders. And we know how that turned out the time they tried it in the middle ages ...

There's such a profound inability in the evil empire to grasp the simplest of truths about the way demonisation works.

This probably comes from the evil heart of the evil empire - oh dear, that fundie religious language is catching.

You see, only a short time ago, there was Tony Abbott explaining how every dinkum digger had won the lottery of life.

And what do you know, right at that time, the American who gave up his winning dinkum lottery ticket was busy explaining how it was Americans who had actually won the lottery ticket of life:

Did he mean "greatest incoherence"?

Well at least it gives the pond a chance to link to the NYRB's How the Murdoch Gang Got Away, currently outside the paywall.

The Murdoch Gang! Yes, that resonates. It's a bit like that other tribe, the James-Younger gang.

At least the Chairman's tweet hints at a way forward: Tony Abbott could cash in his exceptionalist Australian lottery ticket and head off to the United States for a life of American exceptionalism. Worked for gangster Rupe.

But wait, what's this?

Exceptualism?

Well it might not be popular with dictionaries, but it is a favourite word in birther circles, and it shows the madness of King Rupert.

Here's a billionaire talking of masters and liberal elites despising ordinary folk, and pretending that as an 'umble billionaire he sees better, because he's just one of the ordinary folk, as opposed to being a rascal born with a silver spoon in his mouth (though The News wasn't worth much, it was worth more than most messes of pottage people are given as an inheritance).

Then double down and wheel in a man boasting of, and indulging in the title "Prof", and you're so far down the rabbit hole you might be drowned in a pool of tears ...

No wonder Geoffrey Wheatcroft in the NYRB, contemplating the evils of the evil Murdochian gangsters, took time out to admire the twittering:

There are signs that Murdoch’s attention is flagging, and what might be politely called his increasing eccentricity is magnified by his addiction to Twitter—that device helpfully enabling people to write faster than they can think—with such effusions as “Why is Jewish owned press so consistently anti Israel in every crisis?” or “Moses film attacked on Twitter for all white cast. Since when are Egyptians not white? All I know are.”

But speaking of the chairman, today the Terror, in the guise of Elle Hardy, the Terror showed off the depths of its schizophrenia:

Yes, they're still trying to wring some juice out of that load of old rope, but here's how Hardy concluded:

While it can never be said that one looks toward Hollywood for moral clarity, its long history of politicisation means that those who want to be influential must be active in the defence of the principles from which they benefit so handsomely. 
The film industry is rotting from the inside because it lacks the principles upon which to make sound judgments.

Uh huh. That first line delivers the sort of incoherence we expect in Murdoch la la land, but it's the second line that really got the pond going.

With the Murdochians owning Twentieth Century Fox, the pond knows how the inside rotting started in Hollywood... gangsters at the helm.

Here you go, here's a list of the studio's recent films.

Item: the pond holds up for your inspection Exodus: Gods and Kings, which gave a couple of working Aussie actors a chance to work, and which inspired that bizarre 'white people' tweet by the Chairman.

Now the pond has no argument with Hardy.

She manages to sound merely stupid throughout her piece with standard memes, such as Christian satire is everywhere, and Islamic satire nowhere to be found. That only works if you manage to conceive of shows like Exodus: Gods and Kings and Left Behind - Greg Hunt that show here - are deeply clever satirical thrusts at the more bizarre outreaches of Xian thinking.

The real question revolves around the Terror. Does anyone at the rag know of the Chairman's movie connections?

Did anyone think twice about Hardy saying the Chairman and his main company vehicle for profits was rotting from the inside?

It might be true, but should it be said in the Terror?

Wh,y that's up there with Dame Slap explaining how fare evasion is the best way to get ahead in life ...

Oh okay, it's the day after the first day of the year, and the reptiles are slow to stir, with many still stuck on a hot holiday rock (how's that rock today, crow eaters?)

Meanwhile, it seems a few lottery winners have been disturbed by the antics of the guest cartoonists who have been hired by the Canberra Times to replace David Pope while he's on leave.

The latest is indeed a curious one:

Now the pond was never a big fan of the twee Schulz, but the wrestling-loving Nick - oh George was gorgeous Nick, no doubt about it - has struck just the right nonsensical tone with this effort (as usual, the other efforts in the series can be found here).

First he's made Lucy verbose, in the patented Nick way, and he's done a neat role reversal when it comes to doing the dump, and he's dressed up his real intentions with a fine flurry of rhetoric.

And he sent the pond scurrying off to check the primary sources, and be reminded of all the actual outcomes of this sort of game-playing:

Ah yes, it's going to be a good year. All the best for every lottery ticket winner in this lucky Abbott country in this brand new year ... and stand by for all the last minute changes ... and remember, if you want to get to Budapest, avoid paying for the fare ...

Thanks to a reader drawing attention to this Moir cartoon (and more Moir here):