It's Friday, and the pond is feeling a little light-headed. Too much time spent amongst the Murdochians?

Can the pond just start off by noting how badly James Ashby seems to have been advised by Mal Brough on at least three occasions? (Ashby's motives over Slipper allegations dubious, say lawyers).

A pity the pond's partner wasn't consulted, having dismissed an employee for sexual harassment in recent times.

So will Australia yet again become the recipient of advice from Mal Brough as he attempts to step up to Parliament one more time? Watch out Tasmania. You never know when an invasion might be considered a good idea.

Meanwhile, on a lighter note, the gnomic utterances continue:

Middle America mostly

in great shape

And spirit

Versus both coasts

Almost opposite

But with some great exceptions.

On the one hand, you might wonder who tweeted this tripe and take great exception to the blithering of a silly billy, on the other, you might not give a flying fuck.

Never mind, thank god it's Friday, and the twittering tweet stylings of Chairman Rupert provide a great send-off to the weekend (and there's more tweets here).

It also turns out that the chairman's wife is a big fan of Rita Wilson, caught by the pond crooning All I Have To Do Is Dream on YouTube).

Statutory legal notice: the pond is in no way liable for any nausea or easy listening nervous break-down induced by clicking on the provided link, and hearing a perfectly good Everly Brothers song turn into a pile of swill (sorry Tom Hanks, it's gotta be said). On the other hand, if you clicked on the thoughts of the chairman and copped the recommendation, maybe you got what you deserved.

Why that's most generous, seeing as how Universal Music is owned by Vivendi, but on the other hand, if the tone comes from the top, it's easy to to see why Murdoch land is philistine land ...

Speaking of philistines, off in Andrew Bolt la la land, the noble scribe recently penned a missive Bolt: hypocrites harm gay men and women which begins in grand fashion:

It offends me to hear someone say gays and lesbians are not normal, writes Andrew Bolt.

Bolt then spends the rest of his piece defending Professor Kurvilla George, insinuating authoritarianism, a witch-hunt, and persecutory leftists, and so on and on, while decrying the concept of gay marriage, before arriving at the heart of the matter:

As it happens, I actually agree George should have quit, but not because he's against gay marriage.
I don't think someone who declares he's against the "further 'normalising' of homosexual behaviour" should be on the board of an organisation devoted to treating people equally.

Yep, in a Doctors for the Family submission, George signed up for this, amongst other things:

We further submit that legalisation of same-sex marriage will have significant ramifications that have been confirmed by research and events here and elsewhere
• the further “normalising” of homosexual behaviour through education with all the health consequences of that behaviour for our children (you can find the submission here in pdf form)

So the pious Bolt draws himself up to denounce George while at the same time denouncing all the leftists and supporters of gay marriage who denounced George, in the process delivering this as a bon mot:

....gays are as free as anyone to marry anyone of the opposite sex.

Would the Bolter recognise a hypocrite if he bit himself on the bum?

The saddest thing of course is that he has a sister, who wrote a poignant piece published in Hoopla under the header Bolt: I want marriage equality. Presumably she's also part of the leftist conspiracy that dares to suggest gays might want to marry someone of the same sex, and indulge in a normal - some might even say ultra-conservative institution - like marriage, rather than marry someone of the opposite sex.

Sure it's possible to marvel and to wonder at the Bolter, as done here, and by Ben Pobjie here. But then I think of the Bolter's sister, and the random acts of cruelty people close to you can inflict without seemingly being aware of their righteous hypocrisy. Even Dick Cheney shows more style and class in the matter.

....gays are as free as anyone to marry anyone of the opposite sex.

Because that's the "normal" thing to do?

Obligatory statutory legal disclaimer: anyone following the links to the Bolter are on their own. Any nausea or irredeemable brain damage is the fault of anyone foolish enough to click on the links provided.

Meanwhile, the paranoid world of The Australian gets weirder and more paranoid.

They say they don't carry grudges, don't indulge in persecutions, and don't mount crusades against their mortal enemies, but if that's the case, why do they keep on keeping on about Margaret Simons?

No links, just a screen cap. We're tired of printing legal disclaimers.

Sure it's well-known that the lizard Oz hates academics - you can almost imagine a sneer and a curl of the lips as they whipped up that header "Academic defends" and snarked "downplayed revelations", about a controversy which has about as much strength as the froth on an inner west cafe latte.

It's well known that the likes of Miranda the Devine hates sandal-wearers, along with other smirking and discreetly eye-rolling hard working reporters (academics, don't ya know, aren't really working, not like working feral Murdochian reporters grafting away at the latest gotcha paranoid conspiracy fantasy).

But after all the heat and the dust and the blinding paranoid light settles, and you head off to Margaret Simons' revelations about the "revelations" here, well smack Christian Kerr down with a feather, you begin to wonder what the fuss was all about.

Front page news? Only in a castle full of paranoids wanting to maintain their paranoia and their rage.

The aggrieved consultant involved in the fuss, Denis Muller, who got a gig working for the Finkelstein inquiry, posted a short note at the end of Simons' post, which included this comical closer:

The Australian’s story also mentions that I included Dr Simons and Professor Matthew Ricketson, who assisted Mr Finkelstein, in the acknowledgements in my doctoral thesis. So I did. I also acknowledged Mr Chris McLeod, then an editorial executive at the Herald & Weekly Times, a News Limited subsidiary, for his assistance.
I don’t suppose The Australian thinks that he too is part of some bizarre conspiracy against News Limited which The Australian seems to think the rest of us are engaged in.
If The Australian was a flesh-and-blood person, you’d think it was off its medication.

Sorry Mr. Muller, the Oz went off its medication long ago, and no matter how hard the pond tries - we've hidden the meds in a milkshake, we've put the meds inside the minced meat - there's no way we can get them back on a decent dose.

Why only today they're back ranting at Wayne Swan for ignoring their class war warnings. No links, there's already too much brain damage in the world.

Perhaps it's because they get their cues and derive their tone from the sublime tweets of the immortal chairman (will he be given the full Mao Zedong mausoleum treatment?)

Now they are complaining

About R Brooks

Saving an old horse

From the glue factory

Oh yes, that's truly inspirational. How about we free base with the chairman?

UK. What's wrong?

Over educated snobs

Sneering at underclass

Supportive caring billionaires

Never sneer

Class warfare in Australia

Let Clive and Gina go free

Snobs no help to upping

Education standards

Academics to blame

Sandal wearers!

Conspiracy in Australia

Hacks at News Corp suffer

Knackery? Glue factory?

Gays can marry straights

Blessed to live in Australia

Yet they resent system

Bolt of insight from the blue

Just like television

Only you can see much further

As long as the roots aren't severed

All will be well in the garden.

Oh okay Chairman Rupert didn't write that mash-up, but what a sublime inspiration he is. We can see his vast mind at work everyday in the festering paranoia of The Australian.

And now since it's Friday, why doesn't we all do a Bob Hawke and sing along with the Everly brothers? You might have to click through to YouTube, damn you Sony, damn you to hell, but if you're old enough to be that nostalgic, you'll remember the words run something like:

Don't want your lo-o-o-o-ove anymore.
Don't want your ki-i-i-i-isses, that's for sure.
I die each time
I hear this sound:
"Here he co-o-o-o-omes. That's Rupert's clown."