Saturday, August 15, 2015

Sorry planet, out of the frying pan into the fire we are ...

The pond was pleased to have been pointed in the direction of this compelling Nat Geo gif, and you can find more, text and video, at the Nat Geo site here.

The pond occasionally likes to pause and think about the world as the reptiles go about their "it's coal, coal, coal, for Australia and the woorrrrld" business:

Noble, valiant scribbler, untiring and ceaseless, and diligent in his attempts to clear the Northwest passage so that we can exercise dominion over the sharks and the ocean ...

Or some such thing. The pond occasionally gets its messages garbled, from an overdose of kool aid and reptile thinking.

But it brings the pond to the real crisis at the heart of the current crisis.

It stops decent, honourable climate scientists from going about the noble business of climate denialism.

Take a look at that remarkable climate scientist, aka the dog botherer. He's been terribly distracted from the beakers and the test tubes and the bunsen burner of late, and instead been forced to contemplate the Liberal navel and work out ways to say that, despite all the turmoil and the hubble bubble, things can still work out well:

Hearken faithful, as the ancient salty sea dog and saucy mariner stoppeth one of three, and explains how Tony Abbott is in a fundamentally good place for re-election.

You there, editorial consultant for the pond, stop your saucy jigging and clapping hands with glee at the thought of another three years of easy blogging. A national catastrophe is no cause for unseemly celebration of your pitiful self-interest.

Let us return to the ancient salty sea dog botherer for his wise words of wisdom, as he tells his tale of woe, and the bird dangling from unhappy necks.

Naturally the prattler blames the woeful nattering negativity abroad in the land, in the patented Dr No style, and a superficial media, unlike the very deep and fruity rich plum pudding laced with rum and kool aid that you get in Murdoch la la land:

The Coalition MPs may wish they did more to save Bishop.

It's lines like that which reward the studious reptile fancier with abundant laughs. It surely beats the cost of Jaffas in these troubled times.

Delusionalism always has a strong appeal, and surely there's none more delusional than the salty sea dog botherer.

Naturally it's all the fault of greenie leftie journalists, the ones that make up the Rupert Murdoch 70% domination of the old tree-killing media.

And worst of all, these deviants have stopped the salty sea dog botherer and the government from celebrating their fine climate science achievements:

Yes, it's all confected chaos and that's all big Mal's fault, and sssh, whatever you do, don't mention clap happy speaking in tongues barking mad ScoMo seizing the moment to push himself and his fundamentalist hard right agenda.

The salty sea dog botherer could have written this:

Hard rightists, led by the barking mad ScoMo, should have claimed a medium-term victory instead of seizing the moment to push the few remaining moderates in the party up against the wall, with ScoMo's persistent, Mynah bird loud call for a referendum a naked ploy to destroy gay marriage forever in Australia, thereby increasing the distraction, highlighting disunity and compounding Abbott's mismanagement.

But the dog botherer never would. And why might that be?

Could it be that the push to install the hard right, clap happy, speaking in tongues ScoMo is growing by the day? And while the salty sea dog botherer can't stand the moderates, he might be able to pivot to ScoMo?

Well if you read Laurie Oakes in the Saturday Terror, it's game on:

Parliament House security personnel have been placed on drone alert. Their latest orders include scanning the skies for remotely piloted aircraft heading ­towards the building. 
Staff in the Prime Minister’s office have also been alerted to a potential new threat. “They’re keeping a very close eye on Scott Morrison,” says a senior Liberal. 
Morrison is definitely not a drone. He is energetic, clever and ambitious. 

Clever? That's a strange concept for a man who thinks he speaks in tongues, but do go on:

And members of Tony Abbott’s Praetorian Guard would not have missed the punchline in an article on the Social Services Minister and his family in the latest Women’s Weekly. 
Morrison, it says at the end of six pages of flattering copy and photographs designed to soften his image and broaden his appeal, is “ready to lead”. 

To lead us all to clap happy speaking in tongues good end times and an early rising in the rapture.

The magazine does not suggest he is plotting to take Abbott’s job at the moment. The nearest it gets to a timetable is to quote a senior MP saying: “If we lose the next election, Scott Morrison will be leader.”
George Brandis, a compliant Attorney-General until now, summoned the courage to dismiss publicly and with considerable contempt the idea of a referendum on same-sex marriage. But the truth is that Morrison’s rise increases the possibility of a move against Abbott before the election if the chaos, brawling and lack of direction in the government continue and the Coalition’s opinion poll ratings fail to improve.

And so on, as Oakes' rehearses all the litany of flops and failures of recent times, and the fear and the loathing:

Victoria’s Liberal Opposition Leader Matthew Guy weighed in with a powerful assault on Abbott’s determination to prevent a conscience vote, accusing him of “poisoning the well of good will” and betraying the legacy of party founder Sir Robert Menzies. 
The aggro is explained, at least partly, by the Coalition’s worsening electoral position under Abbott. A well-placed Liberal source claimed yesterday that Pyne was influenced by party polling suggesting the Coalition could be left with only two seats in South ­Australia. Among those to go would be his own. 
Guy, the source said, would be aware of polling that showed the likely loss of six Coalition seats in Victoria. 
What the public sees, though, is a mess. 
And Abbott gets the blame.

And the terrifying conclusion, which the pond had already canvassed when it saw that Weekly spread?

Although a Turnbull supporter predicted confidently yesterday that “there will be another spill motion”, no one is seriously discussing a ­challenge at the moment. 
If the looming by-election in the West Australian seat of Canning produces a bad result for the Liberals, however, leadership talk will again be rife. 
Turnbull is still the most popular alternative to Abbott. Julie Bishop is a star. The ­concern usually heard about Morrison is that “he’s not ready”. But even critics agree he looks readier by the day. 
A touch of paranoia in the PM’s office is eminently understandable.

The pond is reminded of a famous Tamworth saying, later taken over by a futurist:

As final, conclusive evidence, look at the way the reptiles have lately taken to portraying the frying pan:

What's going on?

The great snatch it is ...

We believe that in order to live the hold and fruitful lives that God intends for us, we need to be baptised in water and be filled in the power of the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit enables us to use spiritual gifts, including speaking in tongues which in the initial evidence of baptism in the Holy Spirit....
We believe that our eternal destination of either heaven or hell is determined by our response to the Lord Jesus Christ. (Shirelive)


  1. Ephemera getting caught up the anathema sounds painful!

  2. Oh dear, Dot, maybe ScoMo will have us all drinking Kool-Aid. No, not the type the reptiles drink, but the green stuff of Jonestown!

    1. Speaking of Jonestown, cf

  3. Hi Dorothy,

    Richard Ackland has a few must-read savoury words for the dog innamorato in today's Saturday Paper. Delicious!

    1. And Guy Rundle joins some dots there... will be blood.

      Modern politics was drawn from the struggle of two great and mass classes, each with their different institutions: unions and labour and left parties matched by the clubs and associations that knit together the middle class. This structure, based around industrial capitalism, began to shift as manufacturing was globalised and sent to the developing world. The concomitant rise of consumption, media and image as a significant part of the economy changed the way in which people formed their identities and affiliations. The political representation of the working and middle class was increasingly outsourced to those who specialised in policy, culture and image. Thus we have union leaders, who become Labor leaders, who have never worked in the occupations they represent; right-wing politicians who have never run a business or worked in the private sector. Both sides must thus put on a minstrel show that expresses the values of those who grant them legitimacy.

    2. Canadia votes October 19 -

      Whether or not he loses, he will leave Canada more ignorant than he found it. The real question for the coming election is a simple but grand one: Do Canadians like their country like that?

  4. "Julie Bishop is a star"??

    I can't decide whether that means she's a White Dwarf or a Black Hole.

    1. Definitely not a Red Giant, Anon.

  5. "Saucy" may not apply to Dame Jane, but she is the one who knows where all the bodies are buried and she can enjoy the odd cheeky jape. Like Public servants 'make up' red tape.
    She can say stuff like "Encouraged by these results, the government has commissioned another eight efficiency reviews" that's swallowed like a dollop of profound wisdom.
    On that $700k, with handsome personal grooming allowance, she can say what she likes.
    Remind me, DP, how much did Health blow out under the Dame's hand, and how many extra 'agencies' did she install?

    1. As a public servant, I don't appreciate sellouts like that. She should stop bagging her staff and just do her job.

    2. "One of the things I am constantly astounded by when it comes to red tape is how people make things up," Ms Halton told the Audience at Parliament House. "People decide that there is a particular compliance requirement which appears nowhere in any chief executive's instructions or any piece of legislation, and then it becomes holy writ that you have to do something this particular way.

  6. Google images: | do lizards eat onions |
    Google images | do reptiles eat onions | for similar top returns.

  7. A Rapturous Great Snatch!!!

    Looks more like a Repressed Upskirt Fantasy...

    1. Whatever, Anon; the snatch is there somewhere.


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