Dear sweet long absent lord, there's no escape and no hope.
The pond was out and about in Newtown today, and then came the sounds of wailing happy clappers wafting down from the first floor rafters of the Newtown neighbourhood centre.
Hipster central had been invaded by the Shire, and worse, the barking mad fundie Christian shire.
That's a Pentecostal cult church which has its own wiki here, and which boasts of Scott Morrison as a member.
There's biblical literalism:
We believe that the bible is God’s word. It is accurate, authoritative and applicable to our every day lives.
And there's crazy talk:
We believe that in order to live the hold and fruitful lives that God intends for us, we need to be baptised in water and be filled in the power of the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit enables us to use spiritual gifts, including speaking in tongues which in the initial evidence of baptism in the Holy Spirit.
Yes the nest time you hear Scott "speaking in tongues" Morrison talk, remember he's an adept in the cult ...
Don't believe the pond?
Head off to Scott Morrison's page, here.
To keep active, I enjoy kayaking on Port Hacking and when training for our regular mateship treks, you will find me suffering on the Wanda sand dunes. I have been active in church life from a young age and today my family and I are members of ShireLive Church at Sutherland. My Christian faith remains the driving force for my family, beliefs and values.
Some days the pond feels like the hero at the end of Invasion of the Body Snatchers:
Stop and listen to me!
Listen to me!
Those people that are coming after me! They're not human!
They come from the shire.
They speak in tongues.
They think the rapture and the end of the world is just around the corner.
Listen to me!
We're in danger!
Get out of here! (and so on, the rest here).
Eek, don't prod, don't poke, and whatever you do, don't go to sleep, or listen to the tongue warblers ...
The only upside?
Well just around the corner there was this bit of graffiti, which lightened the mood.
Sure the pod people are now amongst us in Newtown, but we must keep calm and display a sense of humour.