Tuesday, June 17, 2014

In which you get a cowboy hat, great maths, and Alec Baldwin closing ... and second prize is ...

Has this gone viral yet?

Acording to Joe Hockey, unemployed youth will have to apply for 40 jobs per month ( SMH ) while other unemployed must apply for 20 or so positions per month. Currently there are some 720,000 unemployed in Australia ( ABS ) competing for about 140,000 vacancies ( ABS ). 

These rather ordinary sounding numbers turn out to represent thrilling opportunities, creating the potential for an administration-led recovery that could power Australia’s future. 

Because the application requirement is created by fiat, there is no need to be tied down by market forces or be inconvenienced by changes in demand. It’s recession proof! Some simple maths cracks open the veil on the panoply of opportunities thus created. 

100,000 youth producing 40 applications per month means 4 million applications per month. The remaining 620,000 unemployed (20 applications per month) would deliver a further 12.4 million applications each month, giving a grand total of around 16 million applications per month. 

With those kinds of numbers each month, the private sector and government will urgently need more staff to process, sort and respond to those applications, as well as keep records in case of Centrelink checking on the individual unemployed. It’s a veritable miracle of job creation.

The pond is indebted to Mike Bolan at the Tasmanian Times here, for this incisive analysis.

It's clear Bolan isn't a leaner, he's a lifter! And a maths lifter whiz at that ...

But wait, there's more:

To review, 16 million applications per month is 192 million applications per year (remember the actual number of vacancies doesn’t matter, what’s important is that there are plenty of unemployed to send applications). If we allow that one person could reasonably review 50 applications per day (less if replies had to be written) or 12,500 per year, that would result in a need for over 15,000 people just to process the applications!!! Each of them would need supervision, management, training, quality assurance, safety and human resources leading to total employment of around 25,000!

And there's even more, but give the man a click. He deserves it.

Besides, the pond now only has time for a important message from its sponsor, the man in the cowboy hat who ensures loonacy is alive and well in this loonatic land.



  1. I tried in my own little way over at Poll Bludger a few days ago to do the maths as Bolan has done.

    Except my base figure for youth unemployment was around 270,000, a figure I got from Fig 1 here:



  2. Another one of the IPA's fantasy wishes being carried into practice by Abbott and co. Screw the Aborigines.

    A frontline Indigenous services program, launched on a recommendation by the royal commission into Aboriginal deaths in custody, has been told it will no longer receive federal funding from the end of the month.

    The NSW and ACT Aboriginal Legal Service (ALS) was informed last week its funding of $500,000 a year for a program helping Indigenous people reintegrate into daily life after jail would end on 30 June.


    1. More here -


      "Ultimately the ‘new’ crusade promoted by the Abbott government seeks to promote the advancement of Indigenous peoples to assimilation or disappearance. It is as blunt and brutal an approach as the 1960s policy of assimilation."

  3. Nice one on the Mike Bolan link DP. This comment there took my fancy:


    16.I believe a suitable solution may be found in what I’ll call a ‘job applicant’s co-op’.

    What if, say a large enough number of people out of work formed an informal contact site so that although unemployed, they could just ask each other for work every week?

    There’s nothing to the best of my knowledge that stipulates jobs cannot be provided by other unemployed people - people do sometimes need casual help for things they can’t do themselves.

    I’m also not aware of any provision that requires ‘gainful employment’ to be for a specified minimum sum, nor forbids work for goods-in-kind.

    So far as I am aware, the meaning of ‘gainful employment’ is just that - for gain, or benefit.

    Certainly apply for whatever genuine jobs are available, but a network like this could not only insulate against the knuckle-dragging droogies of the witless, but foment an alternative concept to the everyday economy.

    Posted by BillR on 17/06/14 at 12:38 AM


    It'd be nice to see such a ‘job applicant’s co-op’ idea fly, but I note an unemployed union of a few years ago didn't/hasn't spread its wings far.

    Oh, and what Bolan hasn't counted is the number of underemployed also chasing any 'real' jobs. Work but one hour per week and you are counted "employed"! So add another 7% or so under-employed seeking more paid work onto the 5.8% or so unemployed... and you get what in the end ( other than shafted by grinning fat cats and neocons)?

  4. Everything seems pointed at driving Australia at a recession. For what I wonder, the great asset sale of 2015? Safe to say I do not want to be either unemployed or sick in the remaining years of the Abbott government!

  5. This is scary. A spying app that lets you eavesdrop on someone else's 'target' phone in secret. It's available in Australia and is apparently legal.


  6. Funksoul123, that shit-eating grin on the cowboy at the header says it all.

  7. Misogyny is alive and kicking in the disturbed tiny sick mind of little timmeh.


  8. Clearly the Timmies suffer from small penis syndrome and thanks to blokes like Dorothy and that wonderful Lieutenant General David Morrison who seems to have been ignored by the Murdoch media, we ladeez are laughing at them.



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