The immortal Pope delivered such a classic this day that the pond just had to clap hands, dance with joy and celebrate and put it top of the page, ma ...
So brutal, yet probably, with the blessing of an elephant's hide, the elephant will feel no pain ...
And now an apology. The pond hates the new Google imposed comments format, but as with everything Blogger, the pond has no say in it, it just appears mandated from above.
The power is invisible but omnipotent. If the pond should happen to displease the supreme deity, the pond might be vanished from the earth on a click, without recourse, with only a few remnants on the Wayback Machine. It's the true price of free, which is to say there's only freedumb and perhaps MTG - Marge to her friends - not remembering anything at all to be found on this blog.
Should the pond have gone with Wordpress long ago? Way too late to brood about such things, and so here the pond is ... and there the comments format will stay ... until a new edict comes down from on high ...
And so to the usual survey of reptile doings and what a relief this day in the tree killer edition's front page.
Having heard from Uber on the matter of its happy employees, er sorry contractors doing a single job for a single company, things have returned to usual in the tree killer edition, with more Klive kash in the reptile klaw, and a climate scare campaign ...
Ah the old stealth carbon tax. That's been an oldy but a goody for a few decades now ...
Meanwhile the infallible Pope had already spoken about that one ...
And there was a note from Cathy Wilcox ...
... which raised the question ...
Ah well the pond doesn't tweet, and barking mad billionaires must do what barking mad billionaires do, as they have done from long before the days of Getty and Hearst when the railway barons thought nothing of setting loose mobs to bash up workers...
But why this deployment of an elaborate avoidance technique by the pond this day? So many cartoons and so little reptile fodder ...
Well just look at what the reptiles dished up as top of the page, ma, in the digital edition ...
There was the climate scare again, there was nattering "Ned", there was Dame Slap, and the pond's heart sank, because it knew where it must go, and the knowing wasn't good.
Oh there was also a whine about maths, when surely the answer is simple - go Florida and import their maths books.
Oh and there was Brad, still blathering on about Holmes a Court when a correspondent had already alerted the pond to a tweet ...
Yes, when the reptiles come after you, it's a sign there's fear and loathing and a certain shamelessness in the air, but now at last the pond must do its duty for the day, and worst of all, begin with "Ned" ...
The pond must apologise. It hasn't caught the flavour of the reptile presentation. You see that handshake was what featured in both the pond's presentations ... but in reality the reptiles were torn between a hug and a war footing ...
It turns out that handshakes are a dime a dozen and can be had with anyone ...
Oh dear, the bromancer and "Ned" on the same page, and issuing a yellow card to the liar from the Shire's red line ... and he was having such a relaxing time ...
Always at the beach, and with nary a hose in sight ... and so as if by magic, the pond had suddenly arrived at a last "Ned" gobbet ...
And so to Dame Slap, but before starting the pond realises that there might be a few sceptics out there wondering why the pond would take a trip to planet Janet, far above the faraway tree, when surely there might be something else to look at than the usual ABC bashing?
Sorry ... the proof is in the reptile commentary pudding ...
Simon the allegedly unbiased saying? No way, and the pond hasn't the slightest interest in what the Swiss bank accounts man has to say, but look, the reptiles have dug up yet another bigot to deliver a bout of tranny bashing.
Run wild, run frei, but not on the pond this day, though the pond will note just how weird and wacky the reptiles have got in their campaign, and how pitiful and how desperate ...
The Coalition for Biological Reality, Bigot branch? Can Hermaphrodite join that one? Would bearded dragons, clown fish and banana slugs make the world of Biological Reality? (here)
Truly pathetic and wondrously weird that the reptiles should end up there ...
Sorry, sorry, the pond was just asking for a friend, and besides, if the pond wants an undiluted dose of ABC bashing, it will always turn to a MAGA cap donning, UN using climate science to produce world government by Xmas Dame Slap to get out the baseball bat and do the job ... and so the pond must put an end to all these cartoons and avoidance strategies and get down and dirty ...
The pond realises that the rot is now so deep within the lizard Oz that there's nothing any government body could do ... what with phony climate scares, tranny bashing by the day, and all the rest of the claptrap the rag is full of, it's impossible for the pond to keep up ...
There's something truly rotten at the lizard Oz but the pond, perhaps through over-familiarity,. has become accustomed to the stench ... but even then the whiff of mad paranoia from Dame Slap on one of her punitive jags is a tad unsettling ...
Yes, Dame Slap is still sobbing over Xian Porter, and the fudging trudging Tudge, and when it comes to hating, she puts prattling Polonius to shame ...
Luckily there's just a couple of short doses of bile to go ...
That's when the pond remembered that the pond sometimes forgets Dame Slap's other job ...
And the pond sometimes forgets the IPA's, which is to say Gina's mob, which is to say chairperson Dame Slap's agenda.
Feel free to google, or use your search engine of choice, to feast on a huge serve of stories about the IPA and the ABC.
"IPA privatise the ABC" should do it ...
You might think it a basic requirement of a lizard Oz "journalist" to mention wearing such a gigantic Gina's mob cap, and the deeds, works, associations and publications involved in wearing a Make Gina Great Again cap, but then the pond remembered ...Simon says don't you worry about any conflicts of interest because in a one party newspaper, there's only a one-eyed view of the world.
And so what if there's something deeply rotten at the core of the lizard Oz culture? There's simply no way to root it out, or even give it a good weeding ...
But how to stop vigilante journalism of the Gina's mob kind?
Sorry, that's above the pond's paygrade.
It's already deeply entrenched, and with nary a hint of shame, and all the pond can do is turn to the immortal Rowe to wrap up the day's proceedings, with more Rowe wrapping always to hand here in case the UN uses climate science to introduce world government by Xmas ...
It's always the cameos that make the days at the beach such relaxing fun ...
"The pond hates the new Google imposed comments format..." Oh it isn't so bad, DP; the only real difference is that it doesn't seem to remember the noms I've used and I have to type the whole thing in, and not just a 'g' then click on GrueBleen. But then, give it a couple of months and I won't remember it ever having been any different (one of the virtues of age).
ReplyDeleteYou're wonderfully tolerant GB, the pond less so, Blogger manages to piss the pond off at every imposed turn, but you did remind the pond of one of its favourite cartoons, all the more so as the pond moves into dotage with you ...
Delete"You are old," said the youth, "as I mentioned before,
And have grown most uncommonly fat;
Yet you turned a back-somersault in at the door —
Pray, what is the reason of that?"
"In my youth," said the sage, as he shook his grey locks,
"I kept all my limbs very supple
By the use of this ointment — one shilling the box —
Allow me to sell you a couple."
"You are old," said the youth, "and your jaws are too weak
For anything tougher than suet;
Yet you finished the goose, with the bones and the beak —
Pray, how did you manage to do it?"
"In my youth," said his father, "I took to the law,
And argued each case with my wife;
And the muscular strength, which it gave to my jaw,
Has lasted the rest of my life."
"You are old," said the youth; one would hardly suppose
That your eye was as steady as ever;
Yet you balanced an eel on the end of your nose —
What made you so awfully clever?"
"I have answered three questions, and that is enough,"
Said his father; "don't give yourself airs!
Do you think I can listen all day to such stuff?
Be off, or I'll kick you down stairs!"
Sadly, I don't think I've actually made it to that standard of dotage, DP - though perhaps just as deficient of brains as father William, I don't think I'll be standing on my head any time soon But I do recall happily reading about all of Alice's adventures many years (or maybe nearly 6 decades to be more accurate) ago.
Delete" go Florida and import their maths books. " Yeah, those Florida maths books are just what we need:
ReplyDeleteFlorida finally shows us some of their woke mathematics
https://jabberwocking.com/florida-finally-shows-us-some-of-their-woke-mathematics/
That'd be the way to end the "Maths numbers plunge to a new low", yes ?
Stassja Frei: "The lesbians I know ..." Biblically ?
ReplyDeleteBut then we have Her Slappership: "That body [British Ofcom] has powers to impose serious sanctions - including financial penalties of up to £250,000 ($441,700) - on the BBC for breaches of fairness provisions under the Broadcasting Code." But, bg, butt the BBC is a government instrumentality:
"The BBC pursues its licence fee collection and enforcement under the trading name "TV Licensing". The revenue is collected privately by Capita, an outside agency, and is paid into the central government Consolidated Fund, a process defined in the Communications Act 2003. Funds are then allocated by the Department for Culture, Media and Sport (DCMS) and the Treasury and approved by Parliament via legislation."
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/BBC#Revenue
So basically, the British Government is just fining itself, to what end ? For instance:
"According to the BBC's 2018/19 Annual Report, its total income was £4.8 billion (£4,889 billion) a decrease from £5,062 billion in 2017/18 – partly owing to a 3.7% phased reduction in government funding for free over-75s TV licences, which can be broken down as follows:
£3.690 billion in licence fees collected from householders;
£1.199 billion from the BBC's commercial businesses and government grants some of which will cease in 2020."
So what exactly do those "fines" achieve ? Is there any noticeable effect on the BBC at all ?
That's way too deep for Dame Slap, but the pond does love the idea of governments fining assorted government departments and so themselves, and then sending the fines off to consolidated revenue ...where would we be without such Pythonish moments?
Delete