In which the pond mingles pitiful Barners and the savvy Savva ...

The pond began the day torn its usual way, with divided loyalties and - ever since it's gone on its early morning reptile diet - with a shortage of time …

There was leftover business with Barners …

… but then there was the siren song of the savvy Savva …

Now the pond appreciates that few share the pond's devotion to the savvy Savva.

She never attracts comments, but there's something about news direct from the table of the fearless leader in his bunker that always charms the pond …

Still, there was the matter of Barners, crying his karaoke hit, "poor pitiful me …", and the pond is intimately linked to the lad, having been born in the very same Tamworth Base Hospital that ushered Barners into the world …

Now the pond can already hear the cries of granfalloon and false karass from Kurt Vonnegut fans …

A granfalloon, in the fictional religion of Bokononism (created by Kurt Vonnegut in his 1963 novel Cat's Cradle), is defined as a "false karass". That is, it is a group of people who affect a shared identity or purpose, but whose mutual association is meaningless.

The conversation might run, pace Vonnegut ...

"My God," she said, "were you born in Tamworth Base Hospital?" I admitted I was. "I'm a Tamworth Base Hospitaler, too," she crowed. "Nobody has to be ashamed of being a Tamworth Base Hospitaler." "I'm not," I said. "I never knew anybody who was, even if it's sometimes meaninglessly linked to Barners having been born there."

But enough, because the pond, in the manner of Python, decided it could have its cake, and eat it, and still find room for an after dinner mint …

Oh how could the pond resist the charm of the hapless, persecuted Barners, a karass, or should that be a harass? soul-mate ..

Okay, enough of that for the moment, the pond can only take so much granfalloonery in a lump sum.

It's time for a little savvy Savva, in the approved cut and paste William Burroughs way. Sure Bill killed his wife, but that's why nine out of ten Sydney Anglicans approve of his avant-garde approach to complimentary women ...

Speaking of relevance and revenge, it's time for another gobbet of Barners, reliving his greatest hit ...

Dear sweet long absent lord, there was the pond playing the six degrees of separation game with Barners, and the next thing you know, thanks to the gutter-crawling Kyle, he's only one degree of separation away from John Ibrahim …

And now back to the savvy Savva sounding stern, as she tries to explain to Malware the things that must be done ...

Funny that little speech should have come the day that the reptiles pursued their usual white nationalist fear-mongering agenda …

What we need is a last gobbet of Barners to lighten the mood, induce a playful tone …

Say what?

The reptiles thought people who read all the usual Barners guff, and wanting to kill dogs, and his idle boast of being a thuggish pub bouncer, would end up feeling distressed?

But the pond always ends up feeling distressed reading anything in the lizard Oz … shouldn't that warning be made a part of the banner? 

You know, like a spoiler alert before it's revealed that Tony Perkins is a little mad, and so are all the reptiles, and readers should beware because Dame Slap, the dog botherer, the bromancer, nattering "Ned", Dame Groan and all the rest lurk within …

Never mind, it put the pond in a good mood for the final dose of savvy Savva advice and instruction, because she really does believe it's possible to polish and burnish the man who gave Australia the NBN, and a craven response to climate science … and incidentally dumped an astonishing amount on his mates, allegedly in the name of the Great Barrier Reef, one of the great little scandals in recent political history … but don't expect any of that in the savvy Savva's calculation of the odds ...

And that's all there is, when it comes to the great policy void and dumping moola on your mates … number counting and a desperate hope of just keeping the numbers and crossing the line and staying in power, though for what purpose, other than to lay bare the complete void when it comes to actually governing ...

Meanwhile, Malware's great policy triumphs continue apace …

… and this day that triumph has earned yet another Rowe cartoon, with more celebratory Rowe here ...

And that'll do, granfalloon pig, enough of mountebanks, charlatans, and rabies-laden circus clowns, that'll do for the day …