Saturday, September 30, 2023

In which the dog botherer produces a useless metaphor and Dame Slap offers a useless view of history ...

 

There's madness and then there's undiluted insanity. 

The pond rarely mentions thugby league but did notice that it's going to be A record-hot Sunday for NRL final. ABC meteorologist Tom Saunders reassuringly cooed ...

Players and spectators will be thankful the NRL grand final is a night game considering the weather forecast.
A scorching hot north-westerly will send Western Sydney to about 35 to 36C on Sunday, as much as 12 above the October average.
This should pass the previous hottest NRL decider maximum of 34.7C at Olympic Park in 2014.
While it should cool down before kick-off at 7:30pm, a temperature in the high 20s is still likely, similar to the average maximum in the height of summer.

The female rugby league grand final will kick off at 3.55 pm ... but they're women, so you know, whatever ... 

At least the pond has been provided with an excuse to run an immortal Pope cartoon about an alarming toad invasion, not to mention climate tipping points..




Of course you won't read anything about record heat in the lizard Oz, so it's on to the usual reptile duties, and here the pond must explain, as it often does, how it got from there to here ...

First up is what's on offer in the commentary section ...




Not the bromancer on the bloody war with China again. The pond is as full as a Tamworth goog with the bromancer, and knew that war could keep for a Sunday ... it's bloody long and as useless as any bromancer screed, and ditto prattling Polonius doing his usual whataboutism about state schools as a way of excusing fiddling priests ...as if fiddling in state schools excuses the rampant fiddling done by members of the Catholic church ...

And the pond could do without the latest bout of womensplaining, at its most virulent in garrulous Gemma ...




Young men have no idea how to fit in? The pond's bet is that sitting down to a serve of garrulous Gemma would leave them completely bewildered ...

Years of mansplaining, and now we have to endure years of womensplaining?

That just left the poor old dog botherer.

 Why does the pond say "poor old"? The splash should give a clue ...




Like the America's Cup? 

Of all the useless and stupid comparisons, that should surely take the cake. A billionaire's idea of a sporting contest? The pond hadn't thought about the America's Cup for years. Apparently the next one is happening in Barcelona in 2024, but back in 2021 New Zealand wasted gazillions staging it, and now the boats are a funnier shape than a winged keel and might set any player back US$4 million, just to get a seat at the table ...

And so on ... the pond can't believe it had to waste time on such a useless and mindless comparison, such a heedless metaphor, as if contemplating a zillionaire's boat was an inspiration for Aboriginal people, but there was the dog botherer making it ...




Completely clueless ...it was the age of Alan Bond, of looting, rorting and pillaging. 

What has Alan Bond got to offer to anyone except nostalgic moments of comedy?






For those who can't remember the moment, he took the card, threw it on the ground and stamped on it ...

And yet still the dog botherer carried on with the idle, tone deaf comparison ...




The pond realised that the Voice might well be doomed ... that conflation of a superb triumvirate, the lizard Oz, alleged billionaires playing boats, and the dog botherer's birthday seemed to summon a death knell ...



The pond will be voting yes, but why does the dog botherer want to make it so hard?

At this time, the reptiles slipped in a snap ...




The pond would much rather have had a cartoon, but all the reptiles have got is a leaky vessel and a lot of Spoonerisms ... and so ...




It's an old joke, newly minted afresh, but as old as a story in the Fin ...






The dog botherer would have been better avoiding racing on the waves, and stuck to firmer ground. Meanwhile, at least the dog botherer had let the boats go ...





Alas, it's more verbiage, because much of the fearmongering has come from inside the dog botherer's house. If only he'd taken a principled stand and resigned from News Corp, cursing all and sundry as he stormed out the door ...

Okay, okay, just another idle dream ...




Sorry, the pond has already done the "Canberra voice" joke, and apparently principled stands of the Leeser kind are completely useless, so in due course we can expect more ranting climate science denialism from the dog botherer in the cesspit known as Sky after dark ... to accompany the apocalyptic end of world doomism the Voice will supposedly bring ...

And so the pond was left with just one short gobbet to go ...



Yes, fraudulent billionaires can play at boat racing, and the dog botherer will fall for it hook, line and sinker as an inspiration? If a lizard Oz headline about a fraudulent billionaire's boat race is the best the dog botherer has got, the Voice is doomed ...

The pond tottered away from the wreck looking for a bonus, and landed on Dame Slap ...





The pond rarely visits Planet Janet these days, what with all the red cards required to deal with the Lehrmann matter, and the rest of her blather, but talk of history seemed like safer turf ...

As for wanting to stop moralising about the past, that sounded like Dame Slap grasping at straws. If you wanted to look at her past, she invariably, almost infallibly gets things wrong ... from Jordan Peterson to the almost completely forgotten "Lord" - just a faux Viscount really - Christopher Monckton, she's kept bad company, topped by her donning a MAGA cap and storming out into the New York night.

Do these podcasters realise the company they're keeping?




Dear sweet long absent lord, say what? 

Is this Dame Slap's coded way of saying that she doesn't read our Henry, the famous hole in the bucket man each Friday, musing on the wonders of Thucydides? Never gets a single history lesson from Henry?

Yes, Thucydides was Greek, and some have wondered whether he's really worth just being mentioned as a trap, but whatever, our Henry routinely dwells on ancient times each Friday ... and apparently it's all water off a pizza-gorging and wine-swilling Dame Slap back ...

The pond felt shattered from the get go, but pressed on ...




Uh huh, but if the pond might be so bold, it was two men having a fuck, and these days if they happened to do it in certain parts of Africa, inspired by fundamentalist American missionaries and the British colonial legacy and woeful Xians, they'd face the death penalty for doing it. The correct word is dead, dead as a dodo, defunct, a dead parrot, dead, dead, dead ...

The pond can of course see why Dame Slap might b wanting to expunge or rewrite bits of history ... these days you have to use the Wayback Machine to get her greatest hits ...





And so on, and sorry, the pond has an obsession with overlaying the past with talk of rampant ignorance and monstrous stupidity ... and you can call that moralising if you like, and dismiss it, but do these English loons realise the company they're keeping?

It's not a matter of judging the past through our standards or our eyes - even a few Romans thought that Tiberius getting young boys to lick his balls was a bit iffy ... (else why would Suetonius have thought it a tasty, salacious tidbit?)




Say what? Lives of such tremendous richness and colour? Right there is a moral judgment. Sure, Stalin led a life of tremendous richness and colour - his death made a great comedy movie, if you'll pardon the aesthetic judgement - but it would have been interesting to have seen a couple of smug Englishmen sound so smug while living under Stalin's roof ...

The notion that you can quarry the past without the freight of the present is a profoundly silly notion. The moment the pond digs into Dame Slap, there's a visceral reaction ...




And so on, and almost anywhere you look in the past, there it is ... Dame Slap celebrating false gods ...





Meanwhile, these two dorks were blathering on as if none of it matters in the here and now because that was then and this is now ... and the pond wondered why, and then it became clear ...





Ah, but he is a nostalgic Xian.


Back in 2016 in the New Statesman, he scribbled the usual stuff ...

...“Every sensible man,” Voltaire wrote, “every honourable man, must hold the Christian sect in horror.” Rather than acknowledge that his ethical principles might owe anything to Christianity, he preferred to derive them from a range of other sources – not just classical literature, but Chinese philosophy and his own powers of reason. Yet Voltaire, in his concern for the weak and ­oppressed, was marked more enduringly by the stamp of biblical ethics than he cared to admit. His defiance of the Christian God, in a paradox that was certainly not unique to him, drew on motivations that were, in part at least, recognisably Christian.
“We preach Christ crucified,” St Paul declared, “unto the Jews a stumbling block, and unto the Greeks foolishness.” He was right. Nothing could have run more counter to the most profoundly held assumptions of Paul’s contemporaries – Jews, or Greeks, or Romans. The notion that a god might have suffered torture and death on a cross was so shocking as to appear repulsive. Familiarity with the biblical narrative of the Crucifixion has dulled our sense of just how completely novel a deity Christ was. In the ancient world, it was the role of gods who laid claim to ruling the universe to uphold its order by inflicting punishment – not to suffer it themselves.
Today, even as belief in God fades across the West, the countries that were once collectively known as Christendom continue to bear the stamp of the two-millennia-old revolution that Christianity represents. It is the principal reason why, by and large, most of us who live in post-Christian societies still take for granted that it is nobler to suffer than to inflict suffering. It is why we generally assume that every human life is of equal value. In my morals and ethics, I have learned to accept that I am not Greek or Roman at all, but thoroughly and proudly Christian. (Tom Holland: Why I was wrong about Xianity, soft paywall).

Poor old Voltaire, to be so cruelly judged ...

It reminded the pond of other recent cruel judgements and persecutions, as celebrated by Kudelka ...






Meanwhile, Dame Slap was starting to wind down, with a truly awesme line "...Holland makes no judgement about this; he is simply observing that Xianity explains wokeism" ...

At the very mention, the pond had to revive that fateful cartoon, because the word "woke" always produces that reaction ...






Now on to that wokeist moment...




Never mind, the pond has already shot the bolt on Dame Slap's contribution to the hysterical polarisation of American politics around a known fraud, snake oil salesman and bankrupt businessman ...

Far too late in the piece the reptiles introduced a snap of the pair, smirking away, pleased as punch to be picked up and celebrated by Dame Slap ...





The rest was just one final gobbet of nonsense, beginning with the sort of turn the other cheek guff that would simply produce a smack across the chops from Dame Slap when in a feisty mood ...




Are they are aware that they've become part of Dame Slap's rogue gallery? That they're now rubbing shoulders with the likes of Jordan and "Lord" Monckton?

Never mind, it was different to endless ranting about the Lehrmann matter and activist judges and climate science denialism, and the pond was relieved that the past didn't really matter or count in current lives, and so could close with an immortal Rowe ...





Tomorrow, let the eternal war with China resume, and let whataboutism reign supreme...



Friday, September 29, 2023

A dash of Thucydides, a special Speccie treat, and quality time with Killer ... are you not entertained?

 

The keen Keane went on a rant at Crikey with Dan Andrews’ secret is that he understands Victoria, and his haters don’t... (paywall)

Few political leaders get to leave on their own terms. But Daniel Andrews is one of them, and in high style.
After reversing what now looks like the hiccup that was John Brumby’s 2010 loss, in 2014 he went on to completely dominate Victoria, to the point where the idea of the Victorian opposition even being competitive seems risible. Andrews ripped the heart out of the Victorian Liberals in 2018, and then did it again — despite a swing against him — in 2022.
With Andrews building on the legacy of John Cain and Steve Bracks, by 2026 Labor will have run Victoria for three-quarters of the past 44 years.
Critics — and there are plenty, including Crikey — might argue his dominance was exaggerated by a spectacularly inept Liberal Party divided by an ongoing war between moderate traditional Liberals and Christian extremists whose social views would have been out of touch with Melbourne in 1923, let alone now. But Andrews helped make them unelectable with a ruthless political style, a centralised command-and-control management via his office, and an attitude to the media taken straight from Jeff Kennett, who famously heaved sand at journalists.
That conservatives couldn’t land a punch on Andrews for nearly a decade enraged them, and drove the Coalition’s right-wing cheerleaders at News Corp to distraction. Increasingly frustrated, eventually the Liberals and News Corp openly embraced the kind of lurid conspiracy theories previously the province of far-right extremists. The 2022 election campaign was marked by ferocious News Corp and Liberal attacks on Andrews, with independent MPs and candidates joining in to call for Andrews’ execution. All it did was enhance his reputation as the target of Trump-style political tactics, and convince voters the Liberals — and the Victorian press gallery — were obsessed with Andrews at the expense of real issues.The rage against Andrews was fuelled by his hardline, lockdown-centric tactics in response to the COVID pandemic. Even now, big business and its media cheerleaders at The Australian Financial Review despise him for being so willing to shut the state down. But none of it hurt him. In fact, Andrews’ willingness to place management of the pandemic ahead of the interests of business cannily anticipated where the community was moving.
After three decades of neoliberal elevation of the interests of corporations to primacy in public policymaking, Andrews unapologetically went directly against the demands of business. From the perspective of 2023 — marked by PwC, Qantas and profit-fuelled inflation — this rejection of the diktats of the business community and its media arms looks prescient indeed.
That’s what enraged the right so much about Andrews — that far from being “Dictator Dan” or some out-of-touch leftwinger, he effectively reflected the electorate. Even in 2022, in the face of a swing against him, Andrews steered Labor to a 55% two-party-preferred result. If even a skerrick of the News Corp and Liberal accusations against Andrews were true, such a result should have been impossible...

And so on, and the keen Keane went on to offer some criticisms of comrade Dan, but all the same, the main point stayed solid ... and so the pond was startled to see that this day the lizard Oz still couldn't let go, and had mustered up a demonic snap of the man that enraged them so ... for both the tree killer and digital editions ...







He's a feather duster, just let him go, please, for the love of mercy, bring forth new demons to plague and torment the reptile hive mind ...

Meanwhile, over at the Graudian, Graham Readfearn drew the pond's attention to an ad in the lizard Oz, which, the pond not being a reader of the tree killer edition, and not understanding how anyone could pay hard shekels to the Chairman for such ancient technology, would otherwise have missed ...

Climate scientists last week said Rupert Murdoch had done more than almost any other person in sowing doubt and confusion about the climate crisis through his outlets.
Over the years climate science deniers mostly haven’t needed to pay to run their screeds in Murdoch’s the Australian newspaper – they just get commissioned to write in the op-ed pages instead.
But on the same day Australia heard Murdoch was stepping down as the chairman of Fox and News Corp, the Australian ran a half-page advertisement of very old-school climate science denial.
The ad was the work of “The Climate Study Group” – a group of men with links to mining, finance and agriculture that includes two former directors of the Institute of Public Affairs. The group has been running occasional ads in the Australian for almost a decade.
The advert, titled “The Carbon Dioxide Climate Myth”, claimed the threat of a climate catastrophe from rising levels of CO2 was “a myth” and dismissed the role CO2 has played in warming the planet and pushing up sea levels. News Corp was approached for comment.
Prof Steve Sherwood, a climate scientist at the University of New South Wales, described the ad as “a delusional regurgitation of false tropes that have been around for at least 30 years and have been debunked over and over”.

It provided the perfect segue to the infallible Pope of the day ...






Ah, even the pond can't escape the end of the footy season.

And so to the pond's Sophie's choice, with cackling Claire a top of the digital page contender, fighting for a place against the hole in the bucket man's enormous stupidity ...








Actually voting no if you don't know makes no sense at all. If, after careful scrutiny of the matter at hand, and a little diligent research and whatever, you come to a conclusion that your preferred option is ongoing bigotry and punishment of pesky, difficult, uppity blacks, then you can vote no because you think you know ...

The pond thought long and hard about red-carding such a nakedly stupid man, but our Henry is such a deeply learned, erudite and witty man that the pond couldn't resist showing him off ... or at least the most pretentious moments in his posturing ... but he had to be punished in some way, so the pond went gobbet-free ...

...few dangers have figured more prominently in Western thought than those associated with courses of action that are extremely difficult to unwind.
Thucydides, a hardened Athenian general who was neck-deep in the mud of the human condition as it is, rather than as romantics fancied it to be, set the pace with his warning: “No habit is more engrained in mankind than to entrust to careless hope what they long for, while using sovereign reason to thrust aside what they do not fancy.”
Always quicker to wish than to fear, the protagonists of Thucydides’ history all too readily launched into courses of action from which there was no escape, only to discover that in politics, it is the depths that are yawning, not the heights.
It was with those dangers in mind that Aristotle identified “phronesis” – which Cicero translated as “prudence” (prudentia), a word derived from providentia, “to foresee” – as the “principal virtue of the statesman”. Instead of an endless accumulation of facts, what prudence required was judgment and moderation, tempering boldness by clear-sightedness. And it is a striking indicator of the importance the Greeks attached to that virtue that phronesis’ antonym was “aphrosune”, which means “madness”.
The issue of irreversibility loomed even larger during and after the Reformation, when long-established convictions crumbled.
Tormented by the uncertainty that created, the polymathic philosopher, theologian and mathematician Blaise Pascal, whose quatercentenary we are celebrating this year, proved formally that as the irreversibility and possible costs of a course of action increased, the hurdles it needed to clear before it would be chosen by a rational decision-maker increased exponentially.
Less than a century later, Presbyterian minister Thomas Bayes raised those hurdles even higher.
His theorem, which founded the mathematics of inductive logic, showed that if a course of action had failed repeatedly, as have each and every one of the voice’s predecessors, only extraordinarily convincing evidence could give a rational decision-maker the degree of belief needed to recommit to it, much less to do so in perpetuity.
However, that period’s advances in recognising the dangers of irreversibility went far beyond pure mathematics.
There was, most memorably, the ground-breaking statement by Sir Matthew Hale, a formidable scholar who was Lord Chief Justice of England and Wales from 1671 to 1676, that it is “fitter (to) acquit ten guilty persons than condemn one innocent, (for) the loss of the life of an innocent is irreconvertable in this world”.
Faced with the real risk that a decision would inflict irreversible harm, the wise course was to follow the ancient maxim “minus malum toleratur ut maius tollatur” – choose the lesser evil so a greater evil may be averted.
No less ground-breaking was the extension of that maxim to constitutional change. Foreshadowing the extension was David Hume’s observation that reforming a society “‘is a work of so great difficulty, that no human genius is able, by mere dint of reason and reflection, to effect it”; instead, reform required “trials and experiments” that could be adjusted or terminated in the light of their outcomes.

Pond readers alarmed at not being given gobbets of our Henry's profound wit and book larnin' will be pleased to know that the remnants of the graphics department fossicked through the free snaps of ancients to illustrate the piece, rustling up snaps of Hume and Burke at no cost to the Chairman's coffers ...





Even this cheap skate, half arsed kind of interruption was appreciated by the pond:

Subsequently re-articulated by Edmund Burke, Hume’s insight was brilliantly translated into constitutional doctrine in The Federalist Papers, where James Madison warned that ill-judged amendments to the Constitution would not just damage “public tranquillity by interesting too strongly the public passions”; they would, if adopted, act as bleeding sores, eroding the “veneration” of the Constitution that was essential for political stability. A very high standard of proof should therefore be met before constitutional change was envisaged and even more so, enacted.
In short, when what is at issue is a potentially dangerous and practically irreversible change in the polity, “if you don’t know, vote no” has been at the heart of the Western canon for centuries.

In short, ignorance is no defence against stupidity ...

 9.3 Mistake or ignorance of statute law
(1) A person can be criminally responsible for an offence even if, at the time of the conduct constituting the offence, he or she is mistaken about, or ignorant of, the existence or content of an Act that directly or indirectly creates the offence or directly or indirectly affects the scope or operation of the offence.

Ditto voting. Ignorance is no excuse, when it's easy enough to find out ways to be an informed voter ...

The old bigot ended his rant by celebrating his determined ignorance ...

...denounce me as a reactionary, if you wish; but given the choice, I would rather stick with Thucydides, Aristotle, Cicero, Pascal, Bayes, Hale, Hume, Burke and Madison any day. 

Well yes, the pond is pleased to denounce him as a reactionary bigot, dressed up in the plumage of his betters, but actually, it's more the matter of that rich confusion of conservative with ignorance that got the pond going ...

If you happen to think you live in a democracy, and have responsibilities as a citizen, you will appreciate an issue has been put before you, and you will take the little time and trouble involved to learn about the issue, and then vote according to your conscience.

Those ancient Greeks would have expected nothing more or less from their citizens, as noted in the wiki on Greek democracy ...

Pericles, according to Thucydides, characterized the Athenians as being very well-informed on politics:
We do not say that a man who takes no interest in politics is a man who minds his own business; we say that he has no business here at all.

Oh wise Pericles, oh humble transcriber Thucydides, and now we live in an age of lead where pompous, portentous, pretentious blowhards take your names in vain, and besmirch what you offered to the world. Humbug Henry has no business here at all ...

Speaking of the age of lead, the rest of the lizard Oz this day held no interest for the pond ...





There was the craven Craven still fixated on comrade Dan, there was the meretricious Merritt offering humbug dressed up as Martin Luther King, and there was Geoff in his chambers talking about referendum fatigue, when the only fatigue the pond feels is dealing with its daily dose of the reptile hive mind ...

So the pond decided on a rare treat. A diligent reader had sent the pond a link to the Speccie mob, so why not go there for a spring break?




Okay, okay, it's just a troll. Even the Speccie mob thought it was worth a Shovel style illustration ... speaking of which and noting where the pond started this day...






But no distractions, what an epic troll it is and what a hoot ...




Truly, how did the lizard Oz miss out on this? Why did the mutton Dutton lavish this troll on the Speccie mob?

Heads should roll in the hive mind ... as the mutton Dutton honours the onion muncher's time in uniform defending the country (pity about the bone spurs) ...




It's rare that the pond is disappointed, but such was the literal nature of the fare that when the mutton Dutton got to the third word in his triptych, the flow stopped ...





Please, for anyone expecting the pond to make a comment, forget it. The pond was too busy cackling, and laughing out loud and rolling around on the floor and wiping tears from eyes ...

Who knew that the mutton Dutton was a natural born comedian? Why it was infinitely better than watching a GOP debate ...

And speaking of that debate, the pond should note that Killer had done his duty and reported on it, though it took a little digging to find it ...






The pond only ran with Killer so it could note that of late Charlie Sykes' updates in The Bulwark have become a splendid way of enjoying breakfast ...

Yesterday's Trump's Golden Tower of Fraud introduced the pond to this tweet ..
.





The pond did enjoy the X's, and wondered if it should re-brand as Xond ...

It was way better than the Killer illustration ...





And today's Sykes outing was Actually, We're All a Little Bit Dumber ... and ten years ago if anyone had suggested the pond would be laughing with, rather than at, David Frum, the pond would have ordered that anyone out of the Xond ...

“The problem facing all the aspirants on the Reagan Library stage tonight: Republican primary voters don't care about policy. What they want is a proven record of violent sedition, sexual assault, and financial fraud.” — David Frum

Such weird end times ...

And now back to Killer, calling it for the krook, but not before giving the actual night to Nikki ...




The cartoons have already started to flow featuring that line ...






And so to Killer, calling it for the Krook ...





All that just so the pond could end with the immortal Rowe ...






The pond had thought it a pretty feeble line until Rowe got into the detail ... revealing the small feathers on the duck's paw ...







Thursday, September 28, 2023

in which the pond admits the venerable Meade is a better herpetologist, but then has little to offer apart from a standard bro and a sexist lizard Oz editorialist ...

 

The pond swears it hadn't read the venerable Meade's So long and thanks for all the biffs: Murdoch press may miss the man they called Dictator Dan before compiling yesterday's outing (the pond had predicted the departure of comrade Dan would result in a crisis for the reptile business model).

The pond frequently rips off, or tips the hat, to the venerable Meade, as expert a herpetologist as can be found, but always acknowledges the rip or the tip. 

Of course the pond would have quoted the venerable Meade lock, stock and barrel if it had known ...

The Murdoch press made no secret of wanting Daniel Andrews out of power, but they may just miss covering the Victorian premier they labelled “Dictator Dan”. After all, he gave them a plethora of memorable headlines – including Danslide when he won the second of three elections in 2018.
Many a Herald Sun front page was built around a disdain for Andrews, particularly during the Covid lockdown of Melbourne. But the Labor politician made great tabloid fodder.
Material included everything from a fall down the stairs which broke his back, a car crash involving his wife, to decisions to remove level crossings and allow assisted dying and a safe injecting room. And he cancelled the Commonwealth Games.
The premier’s reputation as “Dictator Dan” hardened during Covid when media critics said his strict lockdowns were ruining the economy and a quarantine bungle gave them ample ammunition. The Herald Sun delivered the verdict “You Failed Victoria” in one headline about hotel quarantine policy in 2020.
The anti-Dan press was not confined to the state of Victoria. Over the border in New South Wales, News Corp’s Daily Telegraph was no fan either. The Sydney paper devoted its front page to Andrews on more than one occasion, with headlines such as “It’s God-Dan disgraceful”, “Dan-made disaster”, “Victoria bitter” and “Bordering on madness”. The Daily Telegraph’s editor Ben English defended his campaign and labelled the premier a “fool”.
There was no greater source of vitriol about Andrews than from Sky News host Peta Credlin, who famously clashed with Andrews at a press conference and later made a “documentary” titled The Cult of Daniel Andrews.
Andrews repeatedly refused to accept her line of questioning, saying: “I’m not going to stand here and have things put to me in an attempt to perhaps have them put to me so often that they become the truth.”
But it didn’t matter what Credlin and her colleagues threw at him, Andrews defied the bad press by winning three elections, convincingly, thereby triggering more irritation and a new nickname – Teflon Dan...

And so on and on, and the Terror chipping in reminded the pond that comrade Dan was just another sign of the war on Victoria.

Despite what might be called the RMIT effect, Melbourne is a civilised town. They have trams, and in the CBD they're free. They love style and black. The one thing that can be held against the small pack of rabid neo-Nazis roaming the streets in approved HUN style is that they refuse to dress in a manner befitting Nazis, who always had a sense of dress ... (take it from Hermann Göring) ...

Never mind, the point is that there's a deep resentment at the way that Victorians manage to get by, and as sure as the venerable Meade mentioned petulant Peta, there she was in the lizard Oz today ...




Brutal reign of madness? 

That is, and the pond says it with some understatement, a deeply psychotic headline, with so much resentment beneath, because clearly petulant Peta would have liked to have been a brutally effective political player, but got lumbered with the onion muncher ...

Meanwhile, the venerable Meade was using the reptile compulsive repulsive disorder for another story, Albanese says attacks on Dan Andrews ‘low point in journalism’ as News Corp vitriol continues after resignation.

The Sunday Herald Sun’s front-page photo of the stairs which broke Daniel Andrews’ back was a “low point in journalism”, Anthony Albanese said on Wednesday as the Victorian premier’s exit was farewelled with brickbats in much of the media.
Andrews’ electoral popularity over nine years was a “cult” and his legacy was nothing but a state “deep in debt”, according to the front pages of two major critics: Murdoch’s Herald Sun and national broadsheet the Australian.
“Dan cult over, bill left behind”, read the Australian front page. “Debt Man Walking”, said the Herald Sun...

And so on and on, rabid attack dogs at play, and yet there's no hope of sanity, with this in the lizard Oz today...


 



So don't win three elections in a row and thereby send the reptiles into a psychotic fury ...

Meanwhile, the psychosis explosion left the rag bereft ... and the pond short of anything to offer, as if the pond would pay attention to a lesser member of the Kelly gang celebrating Petey boy ...




That was just a footwarmer routine by an old sock for the appearance of Petey boy himself in the commentary section ...





You have to hand it to the reptiles, they drag old dullards of the Petey boy kind out of the woodwork at the drop of a hat, but as a result, the pond simply had no way to do a decent segue to the infallible Pope of the day... heck, no need for a segue, just run it, run it live ...




But after all that, the pond was bereft, because there was only the bromancer ranting in his usual way about the inability of the country to wage war with China by Xmas. At that point, the irony of Wood's reference to "armchair critics" was the best the pond could do for a cosmic joke ...

The last time the pond dipped into the bro, the pond seems to remember Xi and China were on their last legs, tottering about and ready to fall, like a cream puff paper dragon, but today he was back on his old hobby horse ...





The pond just has to pause to note that reference to the Keystone Cops, because the Keystone Cops were a pretty able slapstick comedy team.

It takes skill to do slapstick ... and the Golden Age was a time for vintage slapstick ...






If the reptiles ran the lizard Oz in half as good a style as the Keystone Cops, they'd have a half way decent newspaper. Instead they have petulant Peta screeching about reigns of madness, which is a kind of comedy, but abject and pitiful ...

Never mind, on with the bro, and instead of peanuts, this week it's nothingburgers and deck chairs, because never a cliché is left undisturbed by armchair bro ...




The pond has heard it all a zillion times before, but even the pond did a double take at the bromancer getting agitated about "cancelling that armour" ...

Once upon a time he never shut up about the need to cancel all that armour ...




And so on, and at this point the reptiles slipped in a snap of a chopper ...






It was around this point that the pond had realised it had been had. The bro needed to fill a column, and he didn't have petulant Peta's or Fergo's right to take the easy and cheap path to a column with a rant about dictator Dan, so he got himself a port, settled into the leather armchair in the club, had a yet another rant about him not being appointed chief of the defence force, and then spluttered a space filler about the military into the reptile void ...




What's this talk about building deterrence? Aren't we preparing for war with China by Xmas?




After the bro, all this left the pond short of a decent segue for the immortal Rowe of the day ...





But that does give the pond a chance to spend some quality time with the undisguised, unalloyed sexism on parade on the lizard Oz editorial department ...




Forget that Spooner cartoon. Something funny happened to Spooner, a bit like the tendency of lizard Oz cartoonists to fall off balconies ...

More to the point, why do the Joan Kirner routine? 

Please allow the pond to answer that rhetorical question. It's because they're both women, and as everyone at the lizard Oz knows, women are frail and inclined to hysteria (see petulant Peta), and so must be admonished and disciplined and brought into line for a good hectoring lecture ...

At this point a snap of Kirner was paraded ...




What a chance the reptiles missed to remind themselves of the real reason they hated Kirner ...





Ah, those were the days ... and so for a final gobbet of hectoring, and lecturing and admonishing ...



A new sense of possibility and purpose?  Jeff Kennett? He was the reason Labor had such a resurgence ...

That'd probably be part of the "Deeming-Kroger Effect", mentioned by a pond correspondent with a sense of humour ...

As for clipping the wings, of course the reptiles want to clip three election wins in a row in the bud, and so the pond was wrong. Dictator Dan might have gone away, say hello to the new Jacinda Adern ...



Ruthless streak!

Usually at this point the pond would end with a cartoon, but again is in urgent need of a segue, and surely the mango Mussolini provides an excuse ...




Cartoonists have been on a roll, valuing the estate ...





And Luckovich  has also been on a roll ...








And while it doesn't have anything to do with the mango Mussolini, damn it, the pond has been itching to run this one for days...






All the more so because it ran ... on Twitter, occasionally known as home to XXX ...