Wednesday, January 27, 2021

In which the reptiles sensibly get Barners to talk about marriage, him being an expert and all ...

 

It was, it goes without saying of the reptiles, a cynical bit of attention-seeking. 

Publish a loon in full loonish flight ... perhaps affording an ironic visual juxtaposition, while Google is wasting its time and energy drawing attention to the reptiles ...

 


 

Then watch the response, the howls, with delight. Notoriety has been achieved, attention has been paid, the reptiles and the agrarian socialists have been rewarded for their loonery ... and naturally the reptiles can file fresh copy on the "controversy" ... and once again Google wastes its time and energy promoting the reptiles ...



 

The next day? Follow the successful recipe, repeat the dose, bring in a fresh loon, offer another poignant juxtaposition ...





But the pond concedes one point to the reptiles. If there was ever an expert in marriage, a proper pontificator to preach about the virtues of marriage, could they have found anyone better than Barners? Lordy, lordy, he's an expert in faithfulness, property sharing, and such like ... and so the pond plunged in ...


 

 

As usual the pond has to take issue with the reptile illustration ... there are many alternative shots of Barners available ... perhaps an illustration of his track record and expertise in the matter of marriage ...

 


 

Perhaps his expertise in, and pure delight with, clean, dinkum virginal Oz coal ...




 

Never mind, the pond has indulged in an inordinate amount of foreplay, and it's time to talk marriage ...


 
 
Of course with too much foreplay, on the night, things can get very disappointing, though it's good of Barners to remind us that wedding photos can soon turn into anachronisms...


 

Ah, marriages always break down with an argument over property and possessions, and important matters, such as staffing ... who gives a fuck about policy if the wife scores the butler?

 

 

Well it's on Tamworth that this loon remains a member, and it's on the reptiles for publishing his "kicking up the dust",  but at least it's behind a paywall, so few will be affected... 

Inevitably, the reptiles wanted to keep sticking to the recipe and stirring the pot, so they rustled up a few dissenting voices, members who weren't that keen on sharing the marriage bed with Barners ... but they also seized the chance to shove in click-baiting videos, so the pond excised them all and put together the remaining detritus ...






 

What to say? Well the reptiles couldn't even discover a photo for poor Jason and dragged out the old """ treatment ...

 


Poor Jason. You don't have a hoot in hell up against Barners ...

And on to the next distraction from the reptiles ... and dammit, it's an EXCLUSIVE response to the EXCLUSIVE outburst by the Canavan caravan, and the pond is almost dizzy at the astonishing amount of EXCLUSIVITY ... and yet how could this tedious member of the city 'leet stand up to the awesome power of Barners at work?


 

Talk about a storm in a teacup, lathered up into a frenzy by a routinely climate science denying, coal loving rag ... but luckily with the usual clickbait video deleted, it's just a couple more gobbets ...




The government has slowly shifted its tone? Not really, and nor have the reptiles, still trotting out their Bjorn-again bullshit ...

But at least that gives the pond a chance to point to the return of the infallible Pope, celebrating SloMo's exceptional legal skills ...



 

And that's an excuse to turn to an elite lawyer, turned IPA lickspittle, the severe Dame Slap ...


 
 
 
The pond does so with a sense of unease. Invasion day has passed, and Dame Groan was at work in her usual way, and there were a couple of pieces on the war in China, with Australia standing by to teach the Commies a short, sharp lesson should they get too cheeky.
 
In lieu of all that, the pond settled for a Dame Slap lecture on the uppity, difficult blacks, and how to handle them ... 



 

Is there anything more satisfying than a Dame Slap blathering on about legal elites, and then read at the very bottom that one of her prized achievements is a Doctorate of Judicial studies?

Here, have a cartoon ...



 

Now on with more Dame Slap ...



Indeed, indeed, it's long been a truism in this fair land that you can't trust shifty, tricky, difficult blacks, always wanting more rations while dodging work. Here, have a cartoon ...



 

And so back to Dame Slap ... imagining a country where blackness simply won't be noted ...  and yes once again she blathers on about the elite lawyers and academics pontificating away, apparently unaware that to anyone outside the Slapian mind bubble found on planet Janet, she looks very much like one of the said 'leet ... though perhaps the pond missed the news that she'd sent back her Doctorate because she wanted to live in a humpy in La Perouse ...


 

Well the pond had to interrupt Dame Slap a number of times, but at least the flurry of gobbets - without excised clickbait videos - gave the pond a chance to celebrate with Rowe, and recall that Dame Slap once strode out into the New York night wearing a MAGA cap ... to celebrate the elevation of a man expert in the art of dog whistling white supremacy, and sending out racist messages ... just the sort of precedent required to comment on tricky, difficult blacks down under ...




Didn't that go well? And doesn't that seem a fair guarantee that uppity, difficult blacks will enjoy and celebrate their IPA 'leet trolling?

Truth to tell, just about every word of Dame Slap's treatise felt so familiar to the pond that it felt like a fever dream ...



Indeed, indeed. The last thing we need is any sense that the uppity blacks might get too difficult, and might even out of control. Next thing you know we'll have a Mau Mau situation on our hands, and white control will vanish ... and where will that leave us? Who could be fooled by the way they make a polite proposal and yearn for recognition, when Dame Slap is on hand to deliver her 'leet scholarly dissertation?

And so to a final Rowe, with more Rowe here,  which ran to celebrate Invasion Day, but also celebrated a painting you can find at the AGNSW here ...

 






8 comments:

  1. "...and then read at the very bottom that one of her prized achievements is a Doctorate of Judicial studies?"

    But Of Course, she is really a fine apprentice Giuliani, or Sidney Powell, isn't she. And learned it all while studying Western-Christian Civilisation in the approved wingnut way. So, what has The Dame to say: "A legislated model is not only more likely to be effective, it is also more likely to be accepted by the people as a model capable of being changed to suit changing circumstances."

    And isn't that just a wonderful example of Giuliani/Powell speak. Consider what Slappy says about ATSIC: "The power to abolish a body that has lost its way was critically important when the Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander Commission was dismantled with bipartisan support in 2004 because it was riddled with claims of maladministration and corruption." Hmmm. "claims of", eh. And nobody would ever make "claims of" that weren't honestly provable, would they.

    So there it is: the wingnuts and their lyin' reptiles want total cancel culture: firstly, to do their best with scaremongering to prevent the thing happening in the first place and secondly, to piss it off as soon as they can if the first - prevention - cancel culture doesn't work. And that is how cancel culture is done by those who know best.

    And just to finish things off, we have this: "a fair compromise between the continuing disadvantage of indigenous Australians and the need to avoid creating a permanent two-tier Australia." A "fair compromise" ? So she blatantly admits that there is, in fact, a two-tier Australia (and has been for centuries) that disadvantages the indigenous but that repairing it would be making the fix worse that the disease.

    Now where have I seen and heard a bunch of claims like that of late ?

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  2. The argument over new coal-fired power station seems like little more than a bit of performance art. Both sides know it's not going to happen for any number of reasons, but it's a convenient distraction from all the things that could and should be done right now.

    Meanwhile the grifters are at work elsewhere preparing to extract some money for projects that are very unlikely to succeed or generally to prolong the life of doomed industries.

    https://www.theguardian.com/environment/2021/jan/23/coalition-quietly-adds-fossil-fuel-industry-leaders-to-emissions-reduction-panel

    "The new chair of the committee is David Byers, a former senior executive at the Minerals Council of Australia, BHP and the Australian Petroleum Production and Exploration Association, who now runs CO2CRC, an industry and government-funded CCS research body."

    "Byers is joined by the economist Dr Brian Fisher".

    Brian f**king Fisher! He's the new Maurice Newman by the look of it.

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    Replies
    1. Yep, I reckon he is. And add this one Bef:
      Coalition granting fossil fuel companies up to $250,000 to attend industry events
      https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/2021/jan/22/coalition-granting-fossil-fuel-companies-up-to-250000-to-attend-industry-events

      Yep, our very own Trump-copying lying grifter.

      Delete
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  4. Taunting The Liberals

    Joyce the Jolly Shagman was sick of these shenanigans
    “We’re under the thumb of those Liberals!” cried he
    And he sang as he crunched all the numbers for the regionals
    "Who’ll come a-taunting the Liberals with me?”

    Down came McCormack to check out this bonker’s song
    Up jumped Barnaby, and bagged him with glee
    And he yodelled as he hoicked that Deputy in the billabong
    "Now who’ll come a-taunting the Liberals with me?”

    Up drove Scomo, chauffeured in his white comcar
    Up roared the troopers, in a humvee
    "Where’s that fool McCormack?”
    “We know you drove the bugger mad!"
    “We’ll charge you with murder - and incessant tauntery!”

    Up jumped Barnaby and sprang into the billabong
    "You'll never take me alive!" gurgled he
    And his ghost may be heard at National Party sing-alongs
    "Who’ll come a-haunting the Liberals with me?”

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh now, wouldn't that just make a fine National Anthem.

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    2. Very, very loud applause for that one Kez. Bravo!

      Delete

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