Monday, September 21, 2020

In which jolly Joe feuds with the bromancer, and the Oreo can't fool the lizard Oz readership ...

 
Every so often, the pond has this fantasy of abandoning the reptiles, and going over to the dark side ... where important, thorny, difficult ethical questions are asked ... such is, what is the value of a vice-chancellor's life? 
 
Everybody in reptile la la land thinks that vice-chancellors, as a tribe, have combined to ruin universities in Australia, and should be shot on sight ... and yet, perhaps there is a case for thinking there's some value in a vice-chancellor. Perhaps in their dotage they could be wheeled into aged care homes and given a shot of the virus, and thereby die in agony, and so serve as a useful warning to vulgar youff. Yes, it would be interesting to see if anyone could make a case for pickling Vice Chancellors, as a way, at least, of avoiding terrible movies, of the kind that puts the pond in a pickle ...

Instead the pond has to be content with the intellectual giants that roam the lizard Oz, and what do you know, with the Major not on view this day, who should confront the pond but jolly Joe offering a firecracker of an insight into the US elections ...

 

Of course President Pelosi is a meme designed to terrify straying sheep into voting for the Donald, and it's mystifying why anyone would bother with that angle down under. Sundry pundits have taken pot-shots at the logic and the very long odds behind it, but we're dealing with Jolly Joe here ... anxious to spread chaos, confusion and controversy ...


 

How mindless is it to read jolly Joe? Well in his last outing he rabbited on about Betty Bankstown and Mary Milwaukee and her family, and now she's returned so he can keep banging on about her ... because once Joe's got a moronic, condescending metaphor in hand, buggered if he's going to let go of it ...


And so on to budgetary matters, and here the pond must cede ground, because no one knows how to do a budget like jolly Joe ... oh for the glory years, and the onion muncher, and the craziness and the chaos and the controversy and, yes, the humour too ...

 

 

And so on to Joe's budget-crunching today, because by golly the lad still hasn't lost it ... and sure the confused lizard Oz editorial process has thrown up jolly Joe like an undigested dog's breakfast, but please enjoy the craziness of it all ...


 
We are living in crazy times? And no mention of the carefully stacked Supreme Court sorting things out in a timely Bushian manner?
 
Last time the reptiles were content to mention that jolly Joe's claim to fame was that he was ambassador to the US for four years. This time they've corrected their error, done the right thing, and put in a plug for jolly Joe's advisory firm Bondi Partners ...
 
Things must really be slow at advisory firm Bondi Partners ...

Our team provides discreet counsel, high-level partnerships and tailored solutions to achieve goals on both sides of the Pacific.
 
We exist to ensure our clients are equipped to handle oncoming hurdles, forecast potential opportunities, communicate effectively and thrive in competitive markets. Through our extensive government, corporate and political experience, Bondi Partners helps clients make sense of increasingly complicated geopolitical and economic landscapes.
 
You might say we’re corporate air traffic controllers.

 
Or you might say we're builders of another corporate Boeing 737 Max, or perhaps furious scribblers for the lizard Oz.
 
Luckily the pond has a cartoon which will help explain what jolly Joe has been saying, with Mary making it clear ...


The pond is frequently slow on a Monday morning, and it took some time to realise it had been trolled by the reptiles. They really only included jolly Joe so that the pond could appreciate the nuanced, tremendously insightful work of the bromancer ...


 

The moment the pond read the bromancer scribbling furiously the chance "to cement his legacy as a profoundly important, historical president", the pond knew it had wasted its time with Joe, though it also had to resist the urge to scribble a variation, "to cement his legacy as a profoundly important, historical Führer und Reichskanzler"....

 

 

You see? Classic bromancer! Ginsburg was a wholly admirable woman, yet she was at the same time a thoroughly despicable, a left liberal judge incapable of abiding by the letter of the constitution and the law, one who wasted time interpreting social mores to suit her outrageous left liberal bias ... 

What we need is a good Catholic woman who will take us back to the good old days of the Catholic church in the 1950s, if somehow we can manage to sort out those wretched left liberal progressives who think women should control their bodies, instead of priests and the bromancer ... (oh and get rid of those gay weddings,  so that priests can get back to doing a bit of loving in private) ...


 

Oh sorry, the pond got a bit ahead of itself. The pond should have talked of Cyrus the Builder and delivered endless bullshit about the wonders of the Donald as a builder who always paid his contractors, and created a university even better than the Ramsay centre, before getting on to Catholic paranoia ...


 

Luckily the pond had a cartoon to help readers understand what the bromancer was really saying ...


 

And so to the bonus of the day, reformed, recovering feminist, the Oreo, apparently trying to troll the lizard Oz readership ...


 

Labor could still be a force?  Surely not, trolling Oreo, surely this is the force ...



Here for that image ... though it probably misses the point. Last night the pond was speaking in tongues, and scored a hint that the rapture would certainly arrive by 2040, and so all this talk of 2050 targets was supremely irrelevant, and soon enough we'd all be in heaven writing One-Star Yelp reviews (sorry, might be inside the paywall, give it a go, waddya got to lose?) ...


 

Yet again the pond was slow to understand, it being Monday, that it was being trolled, and yet after the trolling, the Oreo did try to explain, with a straight reformed, recovering feminist face, how Joel might yet prevail, and the Labor party made safe for coal and Xians ...



 

Sorry, reformed, recovering feminist, but the readership of the lizard Oz wasn't buying it. When you've been drinking the kool aid for so long, there's nothing to be found in an Oreo offering loads of sugar and heaps of cherry cola fizz...


 

Take it away readership, sock it to the Oreo ...


 

Sorry reformed recovering feminist, all that talk of pro-coal realists can't hide the reality that you're out of touch, and the talk these days should be of pro-gas realists, even if you misunderstand the concept of SloMo gaseousness, and mistake the astonishing power of gas for a few verbal farts into the atmosphere ...


Well the pond has already belled that "force to be reckoned with" cat thanks to the mindless kool aid sipping lizard Oz readership, but why not do it again, because come 2040, we'll all be in raptures, or at least marvelling at the visions achieved by SloMo's mob ... because we're not Mary from Maitland, we're average Joes from deep in the belly of the Murdochian beast ...


And so, with all thoughts of the reformed, recovering feminist wiped from the pond's mind thanks to the lizard Oz readership's ability to recreate Jonestown just before a drinking session, it was time for a Rowe image, with more Rowe here ... and if the rough beast hadn't yet slouched towards the election to be born, then it had, with its blank and pitiless gaze, at least slumped into the chair ...



20 comments:

  1. "One-Star Yelp reviews"

    Karen goes to heaven ?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. :)) and John Barilaro goes to hell.

      https://www.michaelwest.com.au/holding-comedians-to-account-nine-and-news-miss-john-barilaro-hit-friendlyjordies-instead/

      Delete
    2. Hmmm. "What keeps dictators in power is an absence of room in the mainstream media for disparate views."

      And I always thought it was a band of anonymous, murderous enforcers. "disparate views in the mainstream media" only applies in some approximation to a democracy IMHO.

      Delete
    3. And you are entirely correct GB. Lazy choice of language is rife these days.......unscrutinised elected officials would be nearer the mark.
      But kudos for renting Barilaro’s humble B&B to call him out. After the mental health team finish with him he will ride off into the sunset, more than likely, although if you or I played those sort of conflicts of interest from public or private offices, we would be behind bars.
      CA.

      Delete
    4. Seems odd that comedians....and particular cartoonists are doing better jobs as investigative journalists than most of the MSM can manage. CA.
      https://twitter.com/helendalton22/status/1307480232044052480

      Delete
    5. That's because in these days of Murdoch and Channel 9 monopoly the only "mainstream media" we have left is the ABC which is struggling to survive SloMo's killoff.

      Delete
  2. Quite a ramble by the Oreo. Is this business of damning labor with faint praise the new reptile thing ? Will it ever replace just raving away hoping that somebody, anybody, is still reading them ?

    But truly, the reptile readers are a wonder: so we have "Nip" informing us that "[Labor] will always get [Green] preferences anyway, and even if they [Greens] won seats from Labor in the inner cities, their votes in the chamber would never favour the Coalition."

    Nip must be too young then, to remember when, in the Commonwealth parliament the Greens voted with Abbott's Coalition to defeat Rudd's Carbon Pollution Reduction Scheme thus proving yet again that "the perfect is the enemy of the good".
    How Australia bungled climate policy to create a decade of disappointment
    https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/2017/jul/05/how-australia-bungled-climate-policy-to-create-a-decade-of-disappointment

    Oh yeah, we all love "the perfect", don't we.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Just a quick trip back to Saturday and the Bromancer's bromance's assertions about "technological stagnation". So, the Bromancer tells us, Douthat has it that "The one great technological innovation of our age is the internet, the digital universe. But this technology has not changed human life in the way that previous generations of technological advance did, the way the invention of railways and electricity and aeroplanes did."

    Ok, we might as well all just curl up and fade away, yes ? Now obviously Douthat doesn't see the enormous progress in biology and biochemostry - especially as applied in the medical field - as in any way "life changing". Ok, so the whole computer revolution - still ongoing - just hasn't been "life changing" at all: the phones, the tablets the whole furshlugginer mess, is just a big non-event. Ho hum. "The thing that hath been, it is that which shall be; and that which is done is that which shall be done: and there is no new thing under the sun." (Douthat is a religious nutter after all).

    Well ok then, here's a little bit of 'been around for decades' stuff that can't possibly be "life changing": AI and Huang's Law:
    Moore’s Law Is Dead. Long Live Huang’s Law.
    https://www.motherjones.com/kevin-drum/2020/09/moores-law-is-dead-long-live-huangs-law/

    But don't bother reading it, in fact don't bother reading anything at all because none of it is "life changing". The very perspicacious Bromancer and his bromance have assured us of that.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. “But don't bother reading it, in fact don't bother reading anything at all because none of it is "life changing". The very perspicacious Bromancer and his bromance have assured us of that.”
      Well of course you go there.......great read. The future is screaming down the track mighty quick.
      Was reading the other day how robotics has changed the meat processing/abattoir industry in Scandinavia since the arrival of Covid. No doubt the factories will stay robotic for ever.
      And there goes the working class voter base......everyone will just presumably be on eternal jobseeker because no one appears enthused about UBI. Although much more available time to dig those cellars/fire shelters during the ever warming summers. So enjoying Spotify GB.
      CA
      https://youtu.be/1HCZnNciB0k

      Delete
    2. I collected two Beth Orton albums (Daybreaker and Trailer Park) but Stolen Car wasn't on either of them. I never lasted until 'Central Reservation'.

      A good one though. And in the meantime you can have this one:
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PXQh9jTwwoA

      And just for the hell of it, this one:
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UyoQUyXccco
      :-)

      Has your book arrived yet ?

      Delete
    3. Oh alright, this one too:
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hbCEs5sg7kQ

      Delete
    4. The book arrived a couple of weeks back GB........should have tailed Chadwick and got the Kindle.:((
      It is at my daughters house currently and waiting desperately for end of lockdown so we can finally visit, get the book and finally see our grandson. He is 6 months old next week an we have only seen him 6/7 times. Thank god for FaceTime is all I can say. Has been pretty rough on Nanna, like you can’t imagine.....but we in Vic. are all in the same boat so we just have to suck it up.
      Alfred Drake singing “why have an olive when you can have an olive tree” brought a Balaclava childhood memory flooding back.
      Alma Park actually used to have an olive grove/avenue.....long gone now I would imagine.
      This family of Greeks roll up and proceed to put their children on their shoulders to pull the branches down till the adults could reach them, and then ripped the branches from the trees to pick the olives.
      And me, all of about 10, telling these fools to stop wrecking the trees......only to be told to fuck off..... and vice-versa.!
      CA.

      Delete
  4. “And so, with all thoughts of the reformed, recovering feminist wiped from the pond's mind thanks to the lizard Oz readership's ability to recreate Jonestown just before a drinking session.”
    And these deluded suckers are actually prepared to subscribe is only the half of it. Do they actually believe they are getting cheaper gas, heaps of jobs....and emissions reduction in a canter?
    Here we are, back in 2014, same policies and the same group of shills all playing their part in the long term game of mates. The only way the Jonestown folk can get in on the gig is if they are invested in Santos,Halliburton, Chevron et al and the pipeliners. I’m sure their descendants will make out just fine with a fat inheritance and a fucked planet.......not.
    It really is stairway to heaven shit from where I’m sitting.
    I must admit I do despair most days DP. It is the same play over the whole planet and the mugs buy it hook line and sinker.
    https://www.theguardian.com/environment/2020/sep/21/coalitions-gas-plan-would-help-fewer-than-1-of-manufacturing-workers-report-finds?CMP=Share_iOSApp_Other
    https://www.theguardian.com/environment/2020/sep/21/coalitions-gas-plan-would-help-fewer-than-1-of-manufacturing-workers-report-finds?CMP=Share_iOSApp_Other

    https://www.michaelwest.com.au/gas-pipelines-flea-bitten-nothing-or-monopoly/
    As for Sheridan, the lurker of Christian journals, .......how do your square your existence with a love of Trumpian lunacy and consider yourself as some type of intellectually enlightened political analyst. More despair!
    Talking of cherry cola ......and risky trolling.
    CA.

    https://youtu.be/Wy0RGsd2-JA


    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Gracious: a nice big electric acoustic and a neat shoulder-strapped dobro. And some not bad vocalising too.

      Ok then, how about this one:
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QCiSnv3E8qg

      Delete
    2. Reminds me of Joni Mitchell a bit. I love her version of Stolen Car too.
      CA.

      Delete
  5. Just thinking about Chip Le Grand and Duncan Maskell, can't we send them of to the UK or maybe the US where they have already answered that "difficult ethical question" and where an ideologically prepubescent "vice-chancellor" can be paid even more at a university there than he can ever grift from Melbourne Uni.

    Just a thought.

    Oh, and in case you remember that reptile/wingnut trope about 'judicial activism', this is a good read:
    How the right wing legal machine actually works
    https://www.lawyersgunsmoneyblog.com/2020/09/how-the-right-wing-legal-machine-actually-works

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Interesting few weeks ahead GB...... the GOP have evolved into a crazed Jesuit Crusade machine and it is going to become very obvious to all quick sticks. You only have to look at Sheridans ravings of the last couple of weeks.
      Maskell, being involved in feed troughs, knows where his bread is buttered.
      https://www.macrobusiness.com.au/2020/08/greedy-melbourne-university-underpays-its-slaves/
      https://arena.org.au/cruel-irony-or-structural-cruelty-how-good-people-are-destroying-our-universities/

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    2. Just looking at how that question is framed tells you what Maskell believes. It's a gross oversimplification of a complex problem that assumes you must choose between one party or the other.

      There are some other questions that it would be better to answer first, for instance. why the huge discrepancy between outcomes in state and privately run institutions?

      It's not the punitive cost of keeping oldies alive, it's the lack of oversight in the Uber Eats model of aged care. Admitting this means acknowledging that the market solves all problems approach is serviceable for consumer goods but not so much so for public welfare issues.

      Delete
    3. Uber Eats model is such an accurate description. No accountability, no responsibility and profits off shored.
      The problem with the privatisation of social service of any description is the free kick of self regulation.....if not for self regulation and massive public subsidies most providers would not even look at these sectors....aged care in particular. Private enterprise has no shortage of vultures.....sadly.
      https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/2018/may/02/australian-nursing-home-giants-shifting-millions-in-profits-offshore-report-finds?CMP=Share_iOSApp_Other

      Delete
    4. After deeply considering the case, Bef, I think that "how that question is framed" just about qualifies Maskell for excommunication from the human race. That and the goings on at Melb. Uni on his watch.

      And maybe some of the "aged care" people as well. Sheridan, of course, as with all volunteer reptiles, dissociated himself from the human race years ago.

      Delete

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