Thursday, June 11, 2020

In which the pond goes full holy roller with the bromancer ...


The pond knew straight away it had its reptile winner for the day … because when the bromancer goes off, the bromancer goes right off …

Hallelujah, brothers and sisters, the bromancer brought out the essence of Elmer Gantry true belief in a nanosecond …


Lay out the word, brother, convert the heathen pond ...


Paul? Don't get the pond started on Paul. Talk about a misogynist, talk about introducing all the most wretched, neurotic, repressive and awful elements into Christianity, flaws that linger today in such fine examples as the Catholic church's male hierarchy and the angry Anglicans complimentary women …

But let's not get theological, the pond is in true believer mode …


Now the pond has a pack of ravening wolves in the comments section, just waiting to howl and feed, with a gnashing of teeth and a slashing of words. Give unto them bromancer, so that they might enjoy your holy flesh and your transubstantiation blood ...


Thomas Aquinas? After Paul, the pond can't think of any single human who has helped fuck Christianity more …

But it would be wrong of the pond to go theological, when we're all believers here, and the holy word is in the hands of an inspirational leader (never mind they seem a little tiny) …


What, the last gobbet so soon? And so short? Sad, because back in the day the holy rollers really knew how to lay it on ...


Hmm, did the pond just read all that? What the fuck was the Donald holding in his hand? Seems like a mystery to him …


Damn it, these days it's just as mysterious to the pond.

And now an actual serious question. Is the bromancer having some kind of bible-bashing nervous breakdown?

And so to a few annotations. First the ritual sighting of the cult master ...



Second a dropkick loser award to Alan Moran ...


Sorry, moronic Moran, you'll have to do much better than that to get into the pond. 

If you'd mentioned reduced spending on subsidising coal, maybe, but that attempt to pander to the reptiles with the usual guff about the ABC (and SBS) was just too lickspittle for the pond, even though the site is dedicated to lickspittle fellow travellers…

It's just after that splendid effort by the bromancer, you're clearly more of the bootlicking kind than the grand bible thumper sort ...

Instead the pond preferred its usual company, and the reliable ritual savaging dished out by the savvy Savva ...


The pond sometimes wonders if there will ever be a reptile allowed to ravage the Donald the way that the savvy Savva delights in wielding the stiletto ...


Words should mean what they say? Lordy lordy, let's hear it for Humpty Dumpty … or rather, let's hear it for the Lord …



You see bromancer? Rather than go full Elmer Gantry, there is another way. Perhaps hint that at his core, the Donald is sneaky and more than a bit gutless … a tinpot wannabe dictator. Then you wouldn't get so tormented about Xianity and liberalism, and howl at the moon in a Hillsong way ...


Poor old Mathias, cast out of the savvy Savva's Eden … and as the bromancer would likely suggest, bible in hand, it was those thirty pieces of silver the Judas took when knifing Malware in the back that saw him shown the exit door …

…only to turn up fully clothed, if nakedly aware of his plight and his sinning, and being betrayed by his own mouth in that temple for heathens, the bloody ABC. 

Privatise it, eh, second rate pandering dropkick loser Moran? How else to avoid ongoing public exposure and embarrassment? What, expect Sky News to hold a candle to the foot in approved, bromancer-certified Inquisition liberalism style?


After all that, a few pond readers might be gloomy - apparently liberalism means an eternity in hellfire, or a few words from Mathias - but a few days ago, David Rowe put things in proper uplifting perspective 


And so, with more Rowe perspective here, on to a pond bonus.

The pond is aware that some readers might be wondering how the reptile war on China is going … and the lizard Oz editorialist was luckily on hand with an update ...


Yes, it takes a bold reptile to lead off with "Right on cue, Beijing has inadvertently provided a boost to Australia's education system."

Come on down Humpty Dumpty, you win the day …because soon enough the reptile editorialist has to explain what likely he (very unlikely she) means by "boost"...


Yes, "boost" means business as usual is over for higher education, and adjusting won't be pretty, and as for that battle with the wounded dragon, the reptiles have sheathed the sword and left the field, carrying some robust anxiety that maybe this is only the tip of the iceberg of retribution …

Conflict is unavoidable of course … we are true believers in all that western civilisation holds dear …


But at least we now know, as we continue the battle, what "boost" really means … get fucked tertiary institutions, here's your sackcloth and ashes, wear them with pride and enjoy your life …

 Luckily, to wrap things up, Rowe was on hand to offer another optimistic boost from a few good old boosterist bother boys ...



Oh dear, wait a second, hold on a mo.

Lordy lordy that talk of Hawaii reminded the pond of the bizarre manifestation of that reptile chip on the shoulder whenever there's talk of New Zealand. The reptiles simply can't stand the smug Kiwis and that dreadful socialist Commie swine woman, always smirking, never with a sock in her mouth ...

The oscillating fan was the latest to show signs of the disease, apparently driven by the way that the Kiwis can't say fush and chups properly …


But the pond can't go on dancing with the wounded reptiles forever, or live on bile and resentment alone, and must stop somewhere on the road to recovery, and here is good enough. 

Waiter, some fush and chups if you please …oh just get some loaves and fishes, the bromancer will show you what to do …


6 comments:

  1. Poor old Saul-Paul. Probably didn’t even write 1Timothy and had his letter to Corinth improved by the bishops. Whatever he really taught about women knowing their place, he certainly made it clear that there shall be No Poofters. That wouldn’t have gone down so well with old Nero, what with his predilection for the odd puer delicatus.

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    Replies
    1. Old proverb: "A goat for relief, a woman for pleasure, but a boy for ecstasy."

      No wonder it's all just an old goat song.

      Delete
  2. "And now an actual serious question. Is the Bromancer having some kind of bible-bashing nervous breakdown?"

    I reckon so, DP. I'm still trying to sort out why a religious ignoramus such as the Bromancer would think he could write a book about religion: 'God Is Good For You' when he doesn't have the first clue about "God".

    And I'll bet he doesn't even try to answer the questions I have, like: Why did God "create" the Neanderthals and the Denisovans only to then annihilate them never having given them holy scripture or sent himself as his son to gain forgiveness their sins ?; since God is totally omnipotent and omniscient, "he" knows everything that has happened and will happen in the universe (right down to the movements of individual atoms and particles) and therefore nothing ever changes for God - so how does "he" exist in an eternal frozen instant ?; how does the Bromancer explain the biblical approval for the practice of chattel slavery - a man could sell his daughters, and could keep slaves provided they didn't come from his tribe (but neighbours were ok).

    So yeah, if you've got a few daughters you can sell for good money, and acquire a slave workforce for your farm (thereby practicing 'identity slavery'), I guess God probably is "Good For You". But I guess I might just have to wait for an eternal moment myself before I'm likely to get any answers from the Bromancer.

    Then we get right along to the Savvy Sav, and boy is she being a bit contrarian nowadays. Bulk criticism of Cormann just for starters. And only that left-handed bit of approval as to how he'd "done well to express the anger and frustration of people with the protesters". But how much "anger and frustration of people" was there ? Sure, there was a few Karens about - mostly ensconced in the herpetarium - but I didn't notice any great outcry from "the people", did you ?

    Once upon a time, Savvy Sav's strange behaviour might have been attributed to "woman's troubles", but we don't do that nowadays, do we. So I guess it might just be that, inspired by the Bromancer, she's gone off in the opposite direction. So it goes.

    And finally, more or less, The Editorialist. Like you, DP, I'm ever so grateful for his (their ?) clear explanation of the meaning of "boost". And here I was thinking that it was just a fruit juice that contains my much-loved passion fruit (but without the pips). Now if they'd add muscatel grape juice to the mix, I'd really go for it - preferably 'white muscatel' if there are any left anywhere on the planet.

    Just a few words about the Big PVO though: "The answer isn't as simple as saying Jacinda Ardern has succeeded where Scott Morrison has failed." Oh yes it is, Peevoe, yes it is.

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  3. Meanwhile who and what are the most dangerous enemies of Western liberalism.
    It is act of bad "faith" on the part of nearly all right wing or conservative website etc that Liberalism is worse than a four letter word.
    Two references.
    An essay featured on the Intercept site titled Coronavirus & the Right's Bumbling Messiah.
    A movement based on a new book by Steve Bannon titled The War For Eternity.

    Meanwhile it seems to me that the rigth-wing "religious" vote could be a key determining factor in the November Election (if it occurs). Right wing "religious" media is heavily promoting the meme that the Democrats are going to destroy your "religious" freedom.

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  4. "Without Christianity, there is nothing absolute for liberalism to anchor itself to, so its very practice of tolerance can easily morph into intolerant ideological demands."

    Does any of this make sense? What is so absolute about Christianity? It's a mishmash of goat herder history and contradictory reports all filtered and massaged centuries later by the church authorities.

    How much misery has been caused by folk who think they understand an absolute truth but only have a rather ill-foundered belief.

    I also need to understand what he means by "practice of tolerance". I can furnish lots of examples of intolerance if he needs them.

    Lastly, what's meant by "intolerant ideological demands"? Is he referring to people that want a liveable planet, social justice or maybe, just some honesty and decency from the press.

    I'll just leave this here as an example of what can be expected from the Murdochracy

    https://twitter.com/thealexfreeman/status/1270655442356592640/photo/1

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  5. Sheridan is utterly deranged.
    I bet Rupert has not been reading his rantings of late, either that or Sheridan knows some secret that happened between the old boy and a Catholic Bishop back in the day behind the Presbytery.
    How else could he keep his job?

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