Thursday, February 13, 2020

In which the pond takes a time out with the savvy Savva, and the MAGA-loving bromancer ...


After the hurly burly of Dame Slap, after the reptile battle lost and spun, the pond makes no apologies for settling down to a quiet time with the savvy Savva …

Even the reptiles understand the need for respite, and have put her column in first place, and dressed it out with a reassuring, relaxing image …


By golly, that splash "coalition knives drawing blood" didn't prepare for the Gotham image of a Barners squeezing the life out of the Nationals …

But hey, Barners is the new onion muncher, and everybody has to pile on, but not before a little Polonial-style history ...


What joy to be reminded of the no white anting, no undermining, no sniping man … and by golly, the savvy Savva shows she can also be a tad savage...


Of course all this makes it even funnier that elsewhere in the lizard rag, the reptiles are trying to build up the rebels as healers and party savers …


Oh pull the other one, Canavan caravan.

The stern Savva will have none of that nonsense ...


The pond loves it when the sour Savva talks dirty, scribbles of palls and glooms and resentments, and yet yearns for clear air for SloMo … as if she herself hasn't helped spread a little murk

As for the climate change matter which scored a belated mention, almost a Savva afterthought, the reptiles were up to their usual tricks, and ran a piece by a certain Willox …



Please forgive the pond for forsaking the first gobbet of Willox to focus on that name …



Well if you didn't know, now you do, and the reason the pond didn't pay much attention to the wilful one in full was that he made a major error in his data.

Every reptile scribbler worth his salt knows the figure, delusional and inaccurate as it might be, is 1.3%. It shall be no more and no less, and it certainly shan't include Australian exports. 

Yet poor wilful Willox resorts to crafty, canny subterfuge, by citing less than two per cent, as he goes about the old reptile sport of assaulting the greenies and their devious, deviant plans …


Indeed, indeed. What can little old coal lovers down under do to change anything?

 What we need is government money for a new coal station in Queensland, in the spirit of compromise, because anyone who stands in the way of a pure and dinkum love for sweet clean Oz coal is clearly a wrecker and a poltroon …

But the reason the pond had to cut Willox short wasn't just the predictability of the blathering, and the feigned attempt at hinting that he might give a toss about climate science, provided nothing was done, nothing changed, and it was business as usual, was that the bromancer was out and about, and in the grip of a nightmare …


Of course others were in the grip of a nightmare too …


Well yes, brazen corruption is there for all to see, except when myopia grips Fox News and the bromancer, so it's back to his nightmare ...


But surely there's hope against all these deviants …



And so it falls to the bromancer to muddy the waters, observe confusion and chaos, as he tries to make some sense of the byzantine election process … allowing humble readers to marvel at how he manages to make an inherently undemocratic structure one of the glories of democracy ...


It's a cunning ploy. The bromancer has wound back his usual hysteria, but in the end, he can't resist looking forward to the new style of politics …


The way the reptiles work their way around the buckets of sleaze is to gently tut tut at the Donald and his ways, and then get themselves a decent couch and a goodly supply of popcorn for the show ...


The unpredictable sovereignty of voters is majestic? 

That's a curious way to say that the United States is comprehensively fucked, and it owes in no small part much of its fucking to Fox News and the Murdochian pack … though to be fair, the Ruskis will be doing their thing, the gerrymandering is already in, the hanging chads will turn up in one way or another, and everybody will do their best to keep the voters at home, because they might be majestic, but they're much more majestic if they stay silent in their squats … and naturally the Donald will also be doing his bit to rig the casino ...


And so having already noted a Rowe in the matter of the Donald, it would be remiss of the pond not to note the Rowe of the day, in which he celebrates a solution which would please the savvy Savva …

If the numbers don't fit, if you don't like the numbers, why then change the numbers. 

That sounds a tad crude, so why not call it "refreshing the numbers" because everybody enjoys a little refreshment in the railway canteen of life.

Perhaps call on the figures fiddler to do a little fiddling, after a widespread consultation, which will confirm that figures fiddling is the only way forward (and as usual there's more Rowe here) …



6 comments:

  1. So Tony Burke exhibits 'evil genius' by being across the rules of the House, yet Speaker Tony Smith has a 'sharper political radar' and more familiarity 'than Burke' with the rules.

    Does that make the Speaker an even more evil genius?

    But I must take issue with those Kiwi subs, DP, re the header for Our Niki: "if anything, the leadership upheavals during the past decade have shown they work" - work at what, exactly?

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  2. The Savvy Savv: "Adroit leaders should be able to convince people of the importance of the resources industry as well as the need to deal with climate change."

    Oh, so "climate change" is something that will just have to be dealt with. Now, would anybody like to guess just what Savvy Sav means by "deal with climate change" ? I would say it's odds on certain she doesn't mean "fix it", she just means take it off the agenda once again.

    Oh my, from the Cagle Cartoon: "Ir's not a lie if people believe it." That sure leaves Johnny Winston's "It's not a lie if you believe it" in the festerng dust of history, doesn't it.

    Otherwise, that was a rather subdued Bromancer rant wasn't it ? Barely a mention of the love of his life, Trump that is, during the whole post. Has he decided to copy Peterson and pacify his mind with chemical substances ?

    It really couldn't be over this quickly, could it ?

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    Replies
    1. Admittedly GB, the Bromancer’s rant had minimal Trump content, but what was covered was telling, and he just had to tell us what a telling fact it was:

      “Trump is a destructive opponent. His methods are not attractive but his ability to frame an opponent, to provide a cut-through political character assessment, is extremely formidable.”

      Pukeworthy enough, but this is what he writ before he realised he’d missed his meds:

      “Trump is the evil genius the world needs right now to combat the lunatic left. His tactics are of necessity ugly but his unparalleled ability to denigrate any opponent, to compose deliciously insightful tweets, is indicative of his unwavering brilliance.”

      The first quote is basically the same if you read between the lines…

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    2. You just might have a point there, Kez, especially about missing his meds. He says about Trump: "Here's a telling fact: Warren and Biden were subject to withering attacks from Trump - Pocahontas ... and Sloppy Joe"

      Yep, that's utterly "withering" all right - both of them just folded up their tents and stole away, especially given that Trump's name for Biden was Sleepy (not Sloppy) Joe. After all, if somebody called me 'Sleepy', or even 'Sloppy', I'd be utterly and totally and permanently devastated - wouldn't you ?

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    3. You're right GB, ShareDon is getting sloppy himself, Trump called Steve Bannon "Sloppy Steve". But "sloppy" has far more prurient connotations than "sleepy" don't you think?

      I noticed Trump also called Biden "SleepyCreepy"Joe, which is perhaps what unmedicated Gregory was absentmindedly paraphrasing. To me "SleepyCreepy" trumps "Sloppy" in salaciousness hands down - so the Donald wins again of course.

      In Australia a sloppy joe is a thin jumper, (or pullover, or wind cheater depending on the state), while in the US it's a particularly messy hamburger that drips greasy tomato sauce.

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    4. I did know about the 'sloppy joe' pullovers (I even have one from long ago) though I haven't heard that expression used in quite a long while now.

      But I didn't know about the hamburger - now that's something I can add to my catalogue of Miniscule (sub)Human Foibles for future use.

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