Wednesday, February 12, 2020

In which the pond starts with the coal lovers, but ends up on an epic journey with Dame Slap ...


The pond takes no pleasure in noting it, but this was the self-same guru whom the reptiles were addicted to for an intoxicatingly long time, Dame Slap in particular …

Well, all gurus must pass, the pond never bothered with the transitory phenomenon and just as well, just another Limbaugh in drag, and the pond immediately moved on to brighter reptile news, LIVE as it was happening ...


Oh you can take the coal out of the ground, but you can't take the coal out of the heart of a true believer … and wasn't it sweet for the reptiles to tag that Lloydie piece to the bottom, a reminder of the futility of doing anything when others were shamefully shirking their duty, and embracing coal, and we were missing out, and it wasn't fair, and we wanted our share, and there's a little boy in the corner shop, and what about him, and so on and mournfully on ...

And so to more pleasant things …confusion and chaos of a kind the reptiles and the pond loves …and with the best and the brightest reptile minds ordered to sort it out …

 

Strange to blame Barners, when surely the Canavan caravan must be given awesome credit, and then along comes the bouffant one spoilsport to assure us there's no point blaming anyone … and it's true SloMo did his very best by pandering to the coal lovers …

Never mind, it's reptile Nat day, and unnatural as that is for the 'leets in Surry Hills, just over the road from the best baristas in the world, the pond went along for the ride …


The good thing is, there's plenty of snaps, and to break the tedium of the squabbling miners (the cockies are long gone), and the generous reptiles also flung in a cartoon ...


Poor old Leak. He didn't fall far from the tree, but he fell with a spectacular lack of talent … but back to that wicked, devious chaotic Barners ...


But what of the Canavan caravan, keen to keep coal front and centre? Well at least he scored a snap … but apparently even he isn't barking mad enough, because everyone needs a fornicating, adulterating maddie to come down from the attic and lead the party ...


As for the bouffant one, his contribution was suitably modest and brief, an attempt to pour coal dust on troubled waters ...


Oh what a tangled web the coal lovers weave … though strangely, there's not a mention that at the heart of all this is the determination of a rabid few to stick to their climate denialist guns ...


And now the pond will call on the immortal Rowe to wrap up this part of the proceedings … and many might then like to head to the Rowe after party over here ...


And so to a pond special, designed only for specialists.

If you don't have the heart, if you lack the will, this is not for you.

Dame Slap, Peterson guru worshipper - would you like some barbs, phennies, goof balls and reds with that as you head into the valley of the dolls? - is back in her usual Wednesday slot, but the pond was immediately bored by the topic of the day …


Of course as a front person for the IPA she'd say all that, though that reference to democracy coming from a secretive, furtive lobby group is a sublime joke. 

But the point is, you might as well just head off to the IPA site and read one of their press releases as read this sort of guff. In her declining years, the Dame has become an insipid lickspittle, forelock tugging hack for the wrong end of the town.

So then the pond got to thinking. A few readers apparently took that recent pond trip down memory lane to 2009, to the glory days of the Dame, when she was in her prime, and not just a crude, crud, crappy flack for the IPA.

Some might not realise it, but back in the day, when every reptile was a blogger, and the matter of a paywall wasn't as significant, the Wayback Machine captured a goodly portion of the Dame's outpourings. See this link here, or here

Back in the old days, the pond wasn't lazy, and didn't do screen caps, and used quotes in the text, and actually tried to argue with the reptiles. Foolish, wretched pond …

But that could be remedied, screen caps could be found and presented in abundance ...

Of course the Wayback Machine is a clunky beast, with a useless search function, but if you know your way around, you can get to the mother load of the Dame's blog index, and hit on all sorts of treasures.

To save others this tedious task, the pond thought it might please some nostalgia buffs to lather up a curated collection of distilled essence of Dame Slap climate science denialism from the glory days …

Now if there's any masochists in the house, please leave the room immediately. This is going to be a tough, very long haul … and so without further ado, or any unseemly attempt at an argument, or an interruption …

Instead join the pond in a luxurious wallowing in the mud heap with the Dame, celebrating some of her finest thoughts from long ago ...

















And if that hasn't produced a tear sodden hankie from the very few who managed to make it down Dame Slap's nostalgia alley, the pond has misjudged her astonishing capacity to produce moisture from a stone. Perhaps you should have swallowed a barbie or two …

And now as a reward who made it to the bitter end, if only by cheating and sampling the odd line, here's another reward.

You see Crikey has been doing numbers on types like the figures fiddler, and the pond has such a strong contempt for the figures fiddler that it can't resist breaking the paywall just to show off a little of their work …

Down here at the bottom, the breach is a little sanitised. Only those who can talk of gatlings jammed, blood and sand and the square broken will have made it to the bitter end, and so will know about it (or know how to move the pond by reminding it of the poem Mr Corcoran loved to recite for the sixth class in Tamworth primary) …


Oh isn't he a prize futtock, oh to put it more bluntly, isn't he a devious, ambitious, appalling fuckwit of the first water?



There's more at Crikey of course - the pond rationalises these gobbets by proposing they're just a teaser, a trailer …

And so to some cartoons dealing with sundry other matters, in a bid to make this the longest post in pond history …










17 comments:

  1. "this [Jordan Peterson] was the self-same guru whom the reptiles were addicted to for an intoxicatingly long time, Dame Slap in particular... Well, all gurus must pass "

    Oh I think not, DP. This is the age of Trump and his true believers and that extends outwards. All that will happen is that Peterson will quote something like "this is the exception that proves the rule" and carry on quite undisturbed, unabashed and unmodified and with a still loyal fan base. Including the Dame, boc.

    " In her declining years, the Dame has become an insipid lickspittle ..."

    Sadly, so it would seem, DP. But then comes "a curated collection of distilled essence of Dame Slap "

    Oh, joy, joy, happiness unlimited is come upon us, I thought. But then came the realisation that "I have seen everything that is done under the sun, and behold, all is vanity and a striving after wind." And the Dame is "windy" personified.

    However, now is the time to begin my nostalgia readathon, but before I do just a few words about "the hoax of the Century". It is quite hilarious that the Dame, and sundry others, comments that when 2000 rolled around "nothing happened" whilst also pointing out that $300billion had been spent specifically to ensure that nothing happened. Just amazing that, isn't it, $300billion of prophylaxis and nothing happened.

    At the time, I was an IT professional working for a major (Japanese) mainframe computer manufacturer and most of us in the profession knew that the whole thing was somewhat overblown. The trouble was that if we backed off, could we recognise the point at which it ceased to be overblown and just became 'adequate' ?

    And failing being able to recognise that, what if we kept on backing off, and it all became inadequate and then "something" did happen after all. So we did what we had to do, we shut up and kept on being overdone. What would you have done ?

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    1. "comments that when 2000 rolled around "nothing happened" whilst also pointing out that $300billion had been spent specifically to ensure that nothing happened. Just amazing that, isn't it, $300billion of prophylaxis and nothing happened."

      Lol, I've seen that before and have always had the same reaction. Amazing that people can't see how ridiculous their "and nothing happened" sounds after stating how much was spent on making sure that "nothing happened".

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    2. You kind of wonder what doesn't go on in their heads, don't you.

      Personally, I take it as a major fault and failing in the education system (primary, secondary and tertiary) that Dame Slap and many of the reptiles have higher degrees.

      Delete
  2. Hi Dorothy,

    “The backers and funders of Stop These Things have never revealed their identities.”

    Until now!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gT9xuXQjxMM

    DiddyWrote

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  3. The Dame does quite a Gish Gallop ("Named for the debate tactic created by creationist shill Duane Gish, a Gish Gallop involves spewing so much bullshit in such a short span on that your opponent can’t address let alone counter all of it.") To take one point, about 1934 being the hottest year, "The year 1934 was a very hot year in the United States, ranking sixth behind 2012, 2016, 2015, 2006, and 1998. However, global warming takes into account temperatures over the entire planet, including the oceans. The land area of the U.S. accounts for only 2% of Earth's total surface area. Despite the U.S. sweltering in 1934, that year was not especially hot over the rest of the planet... Globally, 1934 temperatures were actually cooler than average for the 20th century."

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    1. No matter how often and how sensibly it's pointed out, there's just a major subset of homo sapiens (not very) sapiens that just can't grasp the difference between weather and climate. And they never will, I guess.

      Delete
  4. Thanks DP for the Dame Slap marathon. It's worth putting all the idiocy in one spot just to see the immensity of what you are dealing with. If someone came upon a single gobbet they might think "she a bit odd" or "she doesn't seem to understand that", however, reading that lot is like reading a manuscript that reads 'All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play ..........."

    With regard to the figures fiddler, I note that the 3 billion figure was revised down by about , errr, 3 billion. I've seen a similar retrospective somewhere for Dame Groan where her confidently stated, but wildly overstated costings for renewables were picked apart. However, as GB says "no memory, no shame".

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    1. I still most enjoy the 'Copenhagen Plot' one (Oct 28, 2009) when the Dame explains Monckton's insane assertion that the UN's Copenhagen treaty draft contains details of a plot to impose World Government to her 13yo daughter.

      Wouldn't you have just loved growing up as a child of the Dame's and living in her hysterical imaginary universe ?

      Delete
    2. Worse than the Angelic one?

      Funny how the dysfunctional ones always want to lecture everyone else about some issue they cannot handle personally.

      You can obviously add Jordan Peterson to the list as well.

      Delete
  5. Although the short bio for the Canberra Bureau Chief claims he has been there for a long time, it seems he has not read the history of what is now ‘the Nationals’. In various incarnations, since ‘Farmers’ Unions’ and particularly as ‘Country Party’ they have their own history of determining who might be Prime Minister of a supposed coalition, although in earlier days they were much more direct in how they went about that.

    In those earlier days that was done on behalf of rural constituents, the majority of which were ‘small farmers’. In Queensland there was some common ground with the emerging Labor movement, because many of those trying to realise the dream of a profitable family farm also worked for the grazier class for at least some of the year. That probably applied in southern states, but written history on that is scattered or sparse.

    What has been established is that the economic inclination towards low tariffs on imports, support for the co-operative movement, particularly for dairy farmers (‘Farmers’ Union’ has long been a popular brand of milk other dairy products in South Australia) and for single desk marketing for wheat - was set out in the principles of those nascent ‘Country Parties’.

    What presented as a single ‘Country’ party tried not to let on to the voting public that it had at least two factions - who we might identify, conveniently, as ‘farmers’ and ‘landed gentry’. ‘Landed gentry’ - graziers - saw themselves as immune to international economic issues, so long as the workers, without whom they did not have a business, were kept in their place. Read - were to be paid minimum wage, and otherwise prevented from organising for better terms of employment.

    What is now ‘The Nationals’ would be unrecognisable to rural politicians of around the time of Federation. It has steadily drifted away from all of the founding principles - easily illustrated, most recently, by the Dairy Industry Code of Conduct, which was supposed to be a significant policy of a just-departed Minister for Agriculture.

    Yet, the Canberra Bureau Chief writes ‘- the core Nationals’ complaint is that Michael McCormack has allowed Scott Morrison to dictate the rural and regional agenda.’ Might we expect a follow-up article from the Canberra Bureau Chief telling us just what the rural and regional agenda are? Or is that obscured by some, um, Canberra Bubble?

    Other Anonymous.

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    1. Yair, tell us again about 'Black Jack' McEwen and Billy Bigears, OA. Truly a fine exposition of Australian politics. I do wonder if the 'Canberra Bureau Chief' has ever heard of either of them.

      Otherwise, it was indeed that once upon a time the parties of natural government - Libs and CP/now Nats - kept their 'disagreements' just a little bit less openly public. But now we have Barners the Showman to play it all out publicly for our daily, and nightly, entertainment.

      Delete
  6. One of McEwen's ideas early in his time as leader was to seek new candidates - ideally in their 30s, from true rural backgrounds. They would serve perhaps 3 terms, or 4 if blessed with a portfolio, then hand the seat to another bright prospect, in his 30s, with some life experience. This would boost the image of the party, keep the flow of ideas, and so on. What it really revealed was McEwen's little understanding of human nature. Those young recruits of the 1960s, once settled in the safe seat, where not likely to give it up to any romantic notions of 'rejuvenating' the party. In the case of Sinclair, he was there for 35 years. There was a little fiddle, which I cannot recall ever being mentioned in the national press, but Country/National claimed the Interior (or equivalent) portfolio. It was usually the first portfolio for a Country/National. The department managed housing in ACT, and there was always a vacant, executive-grade house, in prime location, which the Minister for the Interior was entitled to take up, with option to buy, on the easy easy terms that were available to the public service, albeit for more humble dwellings. When the Minister moved on, the house went with him (never a 'her' at that time) but the Department would have another within days of completion for the next allocation of portfolios. Other Anonymous.

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    1. Heh - 3 or 4 terms. That means somewhere between about 8 and 12 years of service so they would all have qualified for the then parliamentary pension - automatic on retirement after 6 years of service I think (but it may have been less back then).

      A great way to spread some cash around in the 'country' ? But then, as you say, the likes of Sinclair wasn't going to fall for that: a member's, and even more so a Minister's, salary far, far outweighed a parliamentary pension.

      Delete
    2. GB - I think the threshold was two 'terms' - effectively winning the seat in two elections - but there may have been some minutiae around that. I suspect Sinclair and Joyce have this in common - they need(ed) the money. Otherwise they are quite different - Sinclair was probably the smartest operator, on his feet, in the House, while Joyce . . . . . If my surmise about financial need is correct, Joyce may be there until he becomes (irony alert) 'Father of the House'. If it is for 35 years in turn, he will be there until 2048, and 80-some years old. This would give him a vested interest in projections or targets 'to 2050'.

      Other Anonymous

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    3. I do believe you're right about 'two terms' OA which, because Australia does not have fixed terms for federal parliaments could mean as few as 4 years, or maybe even fewer. So it was fixed as 6 years which is what two terms should actually be. In the lower house anyway.

      I must admit I can scarcely remember Sinclair at all, though he was Nationals leader for 5 years (1984-1989) - but that was during the reign of Bo Borke who, with Keating, took nearly all of the attention back then. He's still alive, apparently, aged 90. Barners is only 52 so we can look forward to many, many more years of him.

      Delete
  7. Phew ... made it at last !

    " in a bid to make this the longest post in pond history …"
    And did it work, DP, did it work ?

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