Monday, February 19, 2018

in which the pond hunts the most dangerous game of all, with gorgeous George and the Oreo ...

 

It was a crazy brave attempt by the lump from the deep north to snatch attention away from Barners, and it was only the complete absurdity of the comparison …


… that established even more firmly that gorgeous George truly is a most remarkable, quite possibly totally unique* (* usage licensed by the ABC)  fuckwit …

Meanwhile, while the tabloids had moved on, Barners stayed front and centre at the lizard Oz …

  

And naturally the Oreo, perhaps the most celebrated reptile in the herpetarium, was on the case …


Actually Barners' greatest sin is probably being a thick dunderhead, and that's a crime to be found across all of the political parties,  and afflicts many others, including bloggers trying to be satirical and post-modern ironic …

Never mind, the pond is extremely proud and pleased as punch that the Oreo has been elevated to the top of the reptile page.

Top of the page, ma, top of the digital page …


Is it just so that the splendid artwork by cult favourite Lobbecke can be given the prominence it deserves?

Who knows, but the pond is as pleased as punch that the reptiles think the Oreo is the new headliner.

You see, in her usual way, the Oreo nurses a deep sense of grievance, and paranoid persecution, and so in a classic Jekyll and Hyde way, she sets out Barners' many crimes … and then her only comeback is to complain that 'progressives' - how the pond hates that meaningless word - refuse to eat their own in the way that the Oreo munches on the Barners ...



Fair enough?

The pond immediately broke out the relevant Oreos, the ones with a name and a taste most suitable for Barners …

 

Poor tortured Oreo … 

Oh dear, is there a Sarandon sounding off in a way that's certain to send her off the unhinged deep end?



Um, on that matter, did the woman involved have a say? 

Or was it just good old Barners, sticking with the patriarchal conservative principles that the man decides …? And the complimentary woman must do what the man decides, no questions asked?

Who knows, but how desperate are things for the Oreo as a defence that the last shot in the locker is "well, at least he didn't order an abortion…", as if it was Barners' sole and proper right to be able to do so ...

But the pond's Oreo is made of sterner stuff than Barners, and she immediately rallied and organised a counter-attack … though sadly all she has here is Bob Hawke, and Hawkie managed his extra-marital flings with considerable skill …

What's more he was helped by the devotion of his wife, who tolerated not just the women but the grog …and in the end, got treatment that made her a martyr and tarnished Hawkie for all eternity ...

It's a measure of Oreo's despair that she should berate the ABC's iView (the show actually aired on FTA as well) for daring to screen a two part documentary about a doddery, long ago PM, and then ask "What have they said about Joyce's flaws?"

Well as Hawkie was rolled on 20th December 1991, by the pond's calculation that means we can look forward to an ABC documentary about Barners and his current cavortings - assuming he goes soon -some time in … let's see, 9 years to 2000, add 17 years and a few months, carry the 1, add the remainder to get 26, add the 26 to 2018, say …

A documentary about Barners' flaws in 2044! Oh if only the pond could be around to see it …

But the pond has got ahead of itself, and worse, the Oreo ...


And so all the Oreo had left was Bill Clinton - it being politics, presumably she felt she couldn't get away with Roman Polanski or Woody Allen … and as for the Donald, well let's not go there … and let's certainly not mention the Democrats who have recently had to take the walk, along with some of their Republican colleagues …

And even worse, at the end of it all, there's the Oreo demanding that Barners move on, in accordance with lizard Oz headlines, and sounding like some pious progressive, or even worse, like Susan Sarandon …

No wonder the Oreo's academic work has been featured on the syllabi of an enormous number of long suffering university students, and she's been cited by the United Nations, as that wretched body goes about using climate science to establish world government by Xmas …

As for the pond, it much prefers the gorgeous George approach …

Call it the Twilight approach, call it "the most dangerous game"


… and what do you know, bloody David Rowe, always in touch with the zeitgeist, had arranged a bit of ute shooting for the day, with more spotlit Rowe here …





5 comments:

  1. I wonder if Malcolm will insist on meeting his boss while in America?
    As it would seem every Australian Prime Minister is expected to meet up with the king maker.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Sexual misconduct is a total red herring in the Barners affair. By keeping the focus on his infidelity the reptiles are deliberately avoiding the real issue of his corruption.

    Turnbull’s sex-ban is cunningly calculated to draw fire away from Joyce’s non-carnal misbehaviour, and minions like the Oriel are gleefuly jumping onto the shagging bandwagon as just another opportunity to bash the ‘progs’.

    What really matters in Joyce’s case is his rorting not his rooting.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. PS That Lobbecke has got to be one of his best! Such insight, such rendering, such ... yeeeuuchh!!!

      Delete
    2. Yes - unless Bob moved Blanche into a well-paid government job I cannot see the relevance. Some appropriate examples do come to mind but, as you point out, they would shift the focus back onto the fraud rather than the impropriety.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hGGhOF46HPI

      Delete
    3. Apparently Hazel reckoned that 'PM's Wife' was, in fact, a well-paid government job. She got to go a lot of places and meet a lot of people she would otherwise never have got near.

      Almost enough compensation for putting up with Hawke. I wonder if Blanche ever felt the same way.

      Delete

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