Thursday, September 28, 2017

In which the pond has a sensitive whiny moment with the bromancer and the onion muncher ...

** Spoiler alert ...


The pond just had to break.

Why should only AJ have the benefit of these hot tips?

It's so unfair, so thoughtless, so typically American of Klepper. The lizards of Oz toil in the field each day, and these tips are invaluable.

The pond hasn't done a complete spoiler - there's more here - but really these shouldn't be kept secret. Luckily some of the ideas come naturally, by pure instinct, to the reptiles.

Someone like the bromancer is adept at points 3, 4 and 5 in sub-plan B, you know, the stuff about being sensitive and whiny about people being sensitive and whiny ...



Perhaps the pond should lead with a disclaimer. For years the pond refused to stand for the national anthem when it involved a dirge to the colonial triumphs of Pommy bastards.

When a new mournful dirge was produced, the pond still refused to stand, not that it turned up at many locations where the dirge was played.

In the early days, there was the occasional glare, frown, stare or hiss at the seated pond. Nowadays nobody much cares what happens when the dirge is played, what with nose-picking and arse-scratching all the go ...

The pond thought sitting down had to do with a natural inclination to stay in a position of rest, though if pushed might mention it wasn't harming anyone and besides freedom of speech and thought and all that stuff, and three fifths of fuck all to do with the newly discovered and named identity politics ...

But then came the bromancer at his most hysterical ...


And there you have it. The bromancer can always be relied upon to gratuitously insult countless people of goodwill by talking of injustice as "plainly imagined or exaggerated."

There's something seriously weird about a self-congratulatory, self-satisfied white man miles from the action across a very big ocean (seriously big, huge, the pond knows its geography), as once again he smiles benignly on obvious trolling and race-baiting, and manages a little himself ...


And at that point, as he always does, the bromancer made the pond's day, with a celebration of the joys of Catholic guilt, and somehow bizarrely, weirdly managing at the same time to separate it from the notion of Catholic shaming ...



And so back to more blather about identity politics from a bromancer who identifies as a self-satisfied white Catholic ...


A reptile appealing to 'decent people'? Go talk to the hand, or better still the Donald ...



And now, having heard a rant about how people speaking freely or kneeling (will someone stop Catholics from kneeling in front of the big liberal cheese in the wafer on the altar?) deeply offends the bromancer, the pond found it piquant to turn to another reptile entry this day ...



It's another entry in the whining, moaning, very sensitive category, and it reminds the pond of the way that the reptiles always get agitated about 18C, while also managing a fainting fit at the sight of someone dropping the knee ...


Indeed, indeed. 


It seems there's nothing like a reptile getting a complaint dismissed to crank the moaning and the whining up to a keening and a wailing of gale force strength ...


Indeed, indeed, and then perhaps at last footballers for whatever reason might be able to drop the knee or listen to a tune without some fuckwit like a bromancer or an onion muncher blathering on about how shocked and agitated they are by someone expressing an alternative viewpoint, or just singing a bloody song, which happens to have topped the charts a couple of years ago ...


Speaking of homophobic bigots, as usual they were out in force in the Terror this day ...


Now the onion muncher is probably a bridge too far for most people, and once again the pond will do its business model untold harm by re-circulating the thoughts of a homophobic fundamentalist Catholic bigot, clearly threatened by gay people ...

The bromancer, the IPA and the bigot. Talk about an exhausting triptych of terror ... enough already.

But here's the thing. Why should punters have to fork out hard cash to chairman Rupert to read the bigotry of a member of the Commonwealth parliament, working on the Australian taxpayers' dime?

Sure it might be like feasting on an undigestible lump of bile bigot porridge, but there's an additional bit of cheek involved in charging for that pleasure ...



Of course there's nothing to be said in response to a bigot in full flight. The pond may as well just drop in a cartoon ...


Substitute gay people for the NFL and suddenly the Donald and the onion muncher are one ... and so it's back to the distractions, evasions, conflations and confusions ...



How much simpler, and how much shorter, it would be, if he simply said that he doesn't actually like gay people and wants to keep them in a box labelled "suffocating new orthodoxy", perhaps arising from an anxiety fear developed in youth about bum sniffing in scrums.

Rejoice? The bigoted natteringly negative onion muncher wouldn't have the first clue about rejoicing. He wants to bind others desires with his bigotry ...



Forget that self-serving tosh about how it's all thanks to the onion muncher that we have a singularly expensive and useless postal survey ...which incidentally isn't a fucking postal plebiscite, it's a fucking postal survey ...

This is a plebiscite in AEC terms ...


It's a voluntary postal survey of a singularly expensive and useless kind.

But then the onion muncher has always been a serial liar of a serious kind, misusing words, conflating and confusing and generating fear and loathing, and making promises he never intended to keep.

Confronted by the onion muncher in full nattering negative mode, is there any hope?

Well yes, because in the pond's observation, some children manage to break free of the baleful prejudice of the bigoted old, who become more and more hardened as they age into their bigotry and then make hay looting and rorting institutions like the RSL, while piously talking about heroic diggers ...

And so it's come to pass even with the onion muncher's family ...



That talk of the Abbott family is saturated with irony, but note also the paranoia about being bombarded by messages from his own daughter ...

Paranoia is the grace note for the final bit of onion munching, with everyone against him ... yes, we're back in sensitive and whiny mode, though happily for the last time this day ...


Says the man lecturing and hectoring Australians about what to do, and expecting them to pay Chairman Rupert for the pleasure of being given a dose of his homophobia ...

Where might it all end if the bromancer and the onion muncher and the lizards of Oz have their way? Well the GOP and Alabama are already there ...





1 comment:

  1. "That talk of the Abbott family is saturated with irony, but note also the paranoia about being bombarded by messages from his own daughter ..."

    And the latest from The Guardian is that: "Abbott’s daughter, Frances, who has emerged as a vocal supporter of same-sex marriage, has encouraged the American rapper to “go harder” in the face of her father’s criticism."

    It proves that common sense, reason and empathy for other humans are not hereditary. You either have them or you don't. Tony Abbott hasn't.

    ReplyDelete

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