Thursday, August 24, 2017

In which the pond has a light breakfast with Donners and the IPA, thanks to the lizards of Oz ...


Where would the pond be without the Terrorists? It's impossible to imagine.

Speaking of imagination, the pond was recently browsing the local throwaway Murdochian rag, the Inner West Courier and came across a letter from one D Johnston of Enmore, railing against "evangelical atheism" and crediting it to the greenies because - and this is where the sharp Alexander Pope wit entered the picture - "they are the watermelon party - green on the outside but Red inside - whose leaders are nostalgic for communism, which turned churches into tractor factories."

Strange, the pond thought the filthy Commie swine turned churches into henhouses and pigsties ...


(Terri Favro - Sputnik's Children, easily googled for more information)

Never mind, D Johnston of Enmore finished off with "Christians believe in humanism that, although faulted, we and this Earth are the centre of the universe. Nothing else in all the universes is as wonderful as the human imagination."

The pond's first thought was what a complete and colossal lack of imagination. 

Wasn't She Herself and Her ineluctable mysteries, such as transgendered transubstantiation, supposed to be beyond the humble human imagination? Was there nothing out there more wonderful than the human imagination, which seemed to involve a bunch of blondes?

The pond's second thought was that perhaps D Johnston was actually a covert evangelical atheist taking the mickey, and mocking She believers by elevating the human imagination above the Xian and other deities ..

The pond simply didn't have the imagination to arrive at a solution, but then the pond routinely finds reality unimaginable. The Donald? Who could have imagined? The lizards of Oz? Who could imagine?

It was in this spirit that the pond turned to a light breakfast at reptile HQ.



They were calling this an EXCLUSIVE and yet dashing Donners, the most prolific ideologue in recent history, was the featured photo?

It's not enough that they publish him every second day of the week? Now they have to interview him and call it an EXCLUSIVE when his views are about as common as two dollar milk, but a tad less useful if wanting porridge for breakfast?

Yet again the pond's limited imagination failed ...

Look, the pond knows that Stefanie Balogh is just making a living as best she can, but if talking to the Donners is an exclusive, why then imagination is dead, and there are no such things as unicorns and dragons...

Joe Kelly is also beyond the pond's imagination. Judging by his carefully cultivated beard in his mug shot, he's a hipster and when not roaming Manuka in search of essence of political coffee, might easily pass in Surry Hills without offending a barista ... (is he a Wahl man, or perhaps a Braun?)

Never mind, just because the pond lacks the imagination doesn't mean it can't be so, and so the pond turned to the EXCLUSIVE, no doubt to read about the education system being turned into tractor factories wherein might be mass produced black armbands...


The pond always loves it when a rogue ideologue, who captured the system for a nanosecond thanks to the onion muncher but then was shuffled back into a Catholic university, rails at the system being captured by ideologues ...

But the pond is fair, and feels the need to heap tremendous praise on Stefanie Balogh and Joe Kelly for the tremendous investigative work involved in this EXCLUSIVE.

How arduous it must have been to have rung up a couple of silly old buggers railing at clouds. How tremendous that the reptiles of Oz felt the need to assign two diligent reporters to do the job.

Now the pond's life would be complete only if they also managed to talk to someone at the Institute of Public Affairs, since when talking of things being captured by ideologues, why not involve someone with practical daily experience performing that feat?


Actually Bella d'Abrera, the pond wasn't an indigenous child, but it certainly remembers vividly what it was like to be abused by nuns, physically and verbally, and in forms quite remarkably cruel ...

Looking back it's easy to see why they were so unhappy. Dressed in full habit, coif, guimpe and black regalia in the Tamworth noon day sun mustn't have been fun, and there was no air conditioning in those days, as they swished up and down the aisle, ruler in hand to rap unwary knuckles ...

The pond suspects they were even more unhappy than their wards, because the children at least had youth and energy and a sense that there was something else out there than being trapped in a stuffy classroom with a bunch of unruly urchins ...

While in the Catholic system the pond never met an Aboriginal child, but then, when it became clear that the pond, lacking imagination, had absolutely no interest in the Catholic system, and transferred across to a state school, the pond again rarely met any Aboriginal children ...

They were siphoned off, herded away into a portable across the oval, in much the same way as their parents were herded off into Coledale ...

It was beyond the pond's control, and yet the pond still felt a little guilt about the way that Aboriginal people were treated then, had been treated before that, and have been treated subsequently ... while complacent, smug, self-regarding whites thought everything was hunky dory and in its place and all was well with the world ... as you do when blessed with an extravagant imagination.

What a relief then that smug, complacent, self-regarding and self-important Donners doesn't give a flying fuck about any of it, and feels absolutely no guilt for the pain and damage inflicted by Catholicism or the pain and damage done to the indigenous population of Australia ...

But at least the pond now knows why it lacks an imagination. Who could have imagined this short, steaming pile of predictable poo could have been labelled an EXCLUSIVE?

Speaking of education, naturally the pond spent the evening watching the reaction to the Donald's Arizona outing, and considered other important lessons that children must learn these days ...



Oh and today is the last day to enrol for a survey.

Who could possibly imagine that? Enrolling for a survey ...




2 comments:

  1. So Donners reckons that: "... part of the problem is students come away with a strong sense of guilt about what we've done as a nation in terms of indigenous culture and history."

    Whereas, contrary to d'Abrera's opinionated opinion, that's exactly what we would, and should, feel if we'd actually been "taught critical thinking skills" and a "balanced version of historical events."

    At least I was taught about the Tasmanian "black line" in my High School* history class. Were you ?

    * For those too young to know, in the dim, dark past 'High Schools' preceded 'Secondary Colleges' in the authorised State Education system.

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  2. Befuddled's dad was foolish enough to be born left handed & the nuns absolutely hammered him to make him write with the "correct" hand. Although he had many other grievances with church, I think this first one affected him most. He described the nuns as "vicious", had an abiding hatred of the institution & had some anger issues of his own.

    You could easily substitute the lefty heresy into whatever grievance the reptiles are moaning about on a particular day. Donners could explain that left-handedness threatens the very foundations of western society, reference some academic (probably in the US) no one has ever heard of, a case (probably in the US) where a righteous citizen is being sued by the left handed PC brigade, Dame Slap could explain how character building violence against children is and lastly, (wrings hands in anguish) what about the reputation of the church?

    Dear me - having a bit of a rant today!

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