Saturday, November 12, 2016

In which the dog botherer and the bouffant one demonstrate how to waste a weekend in useless reading ...


Actually the pond feels somewhat uniquely, somewhat infinitely* (*usage licensed from News 24) comfortable calling the dog botherer stupid, silly, or to put it in the Donald vernacular, a fuckwit ...

But it being the weekend, and the pond in meditative mood, what better way to waste time and discover a universe in a grain of sand, than by reading the dog botherer ...


Whoa, mendacious idiot. Here were people demonstrating, as is their first amendment, free speech right, something of a prized possession in the United States, though how long it lasts under Trumpist GOPers is another matter ... can good old Joe McCarthy days be far away?

The thing that should be noted, mendacious idiot, is that for eight years, people demonstrated against the will of the people, and called Obama illegitimate, a Kenyan Muslim, and so on and so forth.

The phenomenon was known as birtherism, and one of its chief exponents was the birther Trump.

No amount of revisionism can remove those tweets from the intertubes record ...nothing can be done to erase All of Donald Trump's Birther Tweets ...

Talk about the will of the people, fatuous futtock?

When you talk about protesting an election result, singular clown of cosmic proportions, just remember that protesting against the supposed will of the people is a popular sport, especially when the result favours a narcissist braggart misogynist fraud and liar with serial bankruptcies and tax dodging behind him.

Of course it's not just the people on the street that are a tad miffed. There's the likes of David Brooks offering hope and comfort...

Trump’s bigotry, dishonesty and promise-breaking will have to be denounced. We can’t go morally numb. But he needs to be replaced with a program that addresses the problems that fueled his ascent. After all, the guy will probably resign or be impeached within a year. The future is closer than you think. (NY Times here).

That's a terrifying enough prospect, because his replacement is a fundamentalist bigot of a different evangelical kind, though Mike Pence would certainly suit many Republicans who can't wait to be rid of the Donald ...

Never mind, the point of the exercise is to indulge in the thoughts of a dingbat fop, who can't tell the difference between boasting about sexual assault and the use of a few motherfucking swear words ... though if he talked to any woman who's been sexually assaulted, the dog botherer might get a glimpse into why pussy-groping isn't appreciated, as opposed to swearing, which can in certain circumstances be tolerated ...


Well here's the thing, dullard reptile. Over the years the pond has copped insights into all sorts of abuse which is deemed fair and reasonable - from onion munchers standing in front of "ditch the witch" and "bitch" signs to Donald supporters wanting to jail that bitch crooked Hillary ...by way of comparison, calling the Donald a fascist pig with authoritarian tendencies seems almost neo-realist to the pond.

So don't get all sanctimonious and high minded and righteous, you dropkick slug of a simpleton, you bilge-blathering gherkin ...

You see, if we're all against political correctness, why then anything goes ...


Even apparently, if they happen to be racist, sexist, homophobic, xenophobic, Islamophobic and members of the alt right, or the KKK if you will ... you name it, and there you have the grubs that have crawled out into the daylight thanks to the encouragement of the Donald ...

You can speak directly to such types all you like - the pond has spoken directly to many of its family over the years - but the notion that somehow this will change the racism, the sexism, the homophobia - and all the rest, you name it ... is just the sort of delusional fuckwittery you might expect from a dog botherer who's spent his entire column patronising people.

Please, can we have a little more of the infinite wisdom, and the laden with the patronising condescension, flowing like unctuous, greasy, oily fat-saturated dripping, that the pond has come to love? Of course you can, and with bonus dog bothering gruel ...


And so hate is normalised, and anybody who has a mind to call attention to the hatefest currently consuming the United States is dismissed out of hand ...

But it's not going to go away ... the future is closer than the dog botherer thinks ...

And now, because it's the weekend, time for a little light relief ...


Yes it's the bouffant one taking it all terribly seriously, though nobody - including the Donald - has the first clue how untrained, unskilled, uneducated people are going to be sheltered from the boom in automation and low wages which saw the Donald himself favour offshore locations for his Trump brands ...

It's not that this is a novel insight ... nor, if the pond was into manufacturing, would the pond be looking first of all for a local supplier, or for that matter, thinking that driving taxis and trucks was a game with a long term future as driverless vehicles start to roll out ... 

Remember that video, and the fact checking here?


You don't have to be a futurist to get the joke - that Republicans and the Donald have been amongst the busiest in shipping jobs off American shores - but it sure helps when reading the bouffant one in earnest mode ...


But you know, for all that agile innovation was a joke ...


...especially if anyone shares the pond's experience of Malware broadband, which is as agile as a Queen Victoria copper phone line - an appeal to the luddite in us all is a no win proposition. 

It's a bit like asking people to give up their Aldi or two dollar store shopping, and pay a premium on local goods (tell that to SPC tomatoes ... want some local fruit instead guv'nor? Yes, the pond buys Italian canned tomatoes ... want to make something of it?)

Here's the thing. For years, the reptiles have been spruiking the benefits of free markets and international trade and the TPP and Andrew Robb was hailed as a genius (especially being clever enough to get himself a job with the Chinese) and it was all wonderful and marvellous and now suddenly they're getting an attack of the wobblies and indulging in a bout of hand-wringing, and won't someone think of the losers?

Spare the pond's days, but don't spare us the gibberish bouffant one ...


Yes he dealt with important issues ... by not explaining any real policies ...

That's how it goes in la la land, and when they drain the swamp, the pond bets there'll be more than a few reptiles of the bouffant one kind swimming around in the murky mud ...

But okay, the bouffant one has spent the vast amount of time in his column explaining the issues. Now how about the solutions? 

Build a wall, whack on giant tariffs, embark on a trade war with China, and all the other zany Trump "policies"?


Sorry, that's your lot. Policies?

Will Mark Textor explaining how you have to burn down the village to save it, and no doubt we will also have to fuck the planet in order to save it do as a policy?

Well we've been there before ...


Didn't the war in 'Nam work out well with that "policy"?

And there in a nutshell, is the breathtaking stupidity of the Republican party and its reptile supporters, but at least it sets the pond up for a cartoon by the Pope, and as always, more papal infallibility here ...





1 comment:

  1. Apart from the fact that the Dog Botherer is acutely prone to outbursts of 'Pundit's Fallacy' [ https://thinkprogress.org/the-pundits-fallacy-9ee33c511a40#.hgf3nnbs1 ] - not to mention mood affiliation, availability error and confirmation bias - I am intrigued by his idea that somehow the American demonstrators were "against the people". Even a quick perusal of the NYT would have yielded this:

    "By the time all the ballots are counted, she seems likely to be ahead by more than 2 million votes and more than 1.5 percentage points, according to my Times colleague Nate Cohn. She will have won by a wider percentage margin than not only Al Gore in 2000 but also Richard Nixon in 1968 and John F. Kennedy in 1960."

    So tell me again who "the people" are ?

    But one small gem from The Bouffant One needs to be emphasised. The bit where he says:

    "Trump's victory ... The biggest effects are Clinton's low Democratic vote and turnout compared with Braack Obama's past two victories and the US electoral college system which gave Trump a thumping victory in a state-by-state-winner-takes-all approach."

    In short, Hillary was dudded by yet another GOP gerrymander.

    Incidentally, before people get just too far carried away with how much "the people came out for Trump" let us consider the popular vote obtained by Republicans in the last 5 elections:

    G W Bush: 50,460,110
    G W Bush: 62,040,610
    McCain: 59,868,323
    Romney: 60,933.500
    Trump: 60,072,551

    In short, apart from GW's abysmal first showing. Trump really hasn't moved "the base" at all. So much then for all those 'Pundit Fallacy' stories about the 'people's great protest'. Basically, Trump is just your average GOP candidate getting an average GOP vote. The big thing, as The Bouffant, for once, gets right, is the shortage of Clinton supporters.

    ReplyDelete

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