Sunday, October 23, 2016

In which the pond judges the latest Devine column to be a doric or an ionic short of a column...


The pond ducked the Devine being bilious, thereby avoiding spreading more poison about the hapless Morrison, but thanks to The Insiders, the pond was alerted that the Devine had stepped into the gun fight at the Murdoch corral with a column...

As an aside, after bathing in the pool of shouting matches that litters US cable TV - not so much political discussions as octagon brawling - how polite is The Insiders?

In the US, they all sound like they're on a mix of angry steroids and shouty speed.

Even the poodle was happy this morning to dance and smile and laugh gaily and provide some cheer, the cartoon lads were in colonial and camouflage gear, Barners was playing a duck - and being really convincing channeling his inner duckness - and Albo was delivering zingers ...

ALBANESE: ...I mean, if they had any entrepreneurs in the modern Liberal Party they would be selling popcorn outside the House of Reps chamber because what we see is that this mob are so divided they can’t even agree on how to rewrite history. Yesterday you had Malcolm Turnbull essentially call Tony Abbott a liar in Parliament and then you had Tony Abbott return serve and stand up in an extraordinary contribution and essentially call Malcolm Turnbull out. I mean, this was a cage fight on national television on the floor of the House of Representatives. This is a divided Government without an agenda, without a sense of purpose. It’s just about whether Malcolm Turnbull can survive or not. And Tony Abbott – now it’s on. It’s on out there for all to see and it is all of Malcolm Turnbull’s own making because he was incapable of giving an answer to a pretty clear question on Tuesday about the guns for votes deal. 
STEFANOVIC: That’s all you get time for today.

Can't even agree on re-writing history.

Oh okay it was on the Today show, transcript here, but like the pond, The Insiders is waste not, want not, and always recycles ...

Cage fight!

The Devine's offering sounded just as promising ...


And the excuse, pitiful and pathetic and Peta-offensive as it was, could be seen in the crawl space at the bottom of the screen ...


But then the pond got on to the actual 'column' ...


Column? Column!?

That's not a column, this is a column ...


It's what we use to know in Tamworth as short-weight, light as fluff or a pancake ...


Most of the punters who commented were unhappy with the Devine and her ongoing perfidy and treachery ...

A few celebrated ...


Others, the minions of the Bolter Sauron, stayed true ...


Oh stay true, the Gatling's jammed, the square runs red with blood, there's a hush in Murdoch land, the last man's out and it's a sticky wicket ...

Sure enough, the Bolter maintains the rage, seizing on every story about the wickedness of Malware and the glory days of the onion muncher ...




And so on and on and on, and each time the Bolter drops a little acid snark at the end of his thieving of News Corp stories in a way worthy of the pond ...

Or:


I seems to the pond that the Bolter will maintain his hate and rage until the dying of the light.

No Abbott to fill it ... oh the shame, the perfidy, all the more so because the onion muncher was a tremendous maker of policies and a raging success as PM ...

This level of delusionalism pleases the pond enormously.

When we're not having a main cage match between the onion muncher and Malware, there's always the chance of a warm-up bout between the Devine and the Bolter ... the perfumed heart of darkness versus the masked Melbourne mauler ...

Well we'd usually wrap up with a promotion for the Devine's favourite perfume, but everything is so surreal and adolescent these days, it hardly seems enough ...

The pond's wasted youth came back when it walked down memory lane recalling the Tamworth butcher notorious for putting his finger on the scales ...


The pond's not saying it's funny, it's more a matter of balance balance in the almost Samsung "he was a total 1.0 launch flop v. he was a wonderful martyr done down by a dirty malware virus" debate ... 

And so to tip the winner for those who love to gamble.

I the pond's opinion, the Bolter simply doesn't match up to the Devine when it comes to the crunch in terms of shelf space and decent holiday treats ...

While the Bolter's public holiday has long faded from memory, the pong of Devine's parfume remains as strong as ever and lingers in the putrid Terror air ...





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