Sunday, July 10, 2016

In which Mike Baird gets Devined, and Malware gets Peta-ed ...


The pond was deeply disturbed.

There was a photo of Peta, and where there should have been a photo of Miranda the Devine ... was a snap of greyhounds racing ...

Was this some kind of conspiracy, some sort of warped persecution, an insider joke perpetrated by the subs? Given that the entire paper runs on a personality cult, why were they downplaying their most wondrous personality? Usually there's a gargantuan photo of the Devine on view ...

The result was that google search had also gone to the doggies ...


Ah yes, it turns out that the Devine is just recycling Katrina Hodgkinson in The Graudian here, from a couple of days ago, but the pond is always loyal, and so it must heed the Devine's call ...

First the pond must declare an interest, or rather a complete lack of interest. 

While some in the pond's extended family have interacted with the doggies as owners, trainers and gamblers, the pond has absolutely no interest whatsoever in the doggies. And when it comes to Mike Baird, the pond is much more irritated and angry about WestConnex and the property developers that really run Sydney ...

But all the same the pond must remain loyal and heed the Devine's call ...


You have to admire the Devine.

Whenever you want a heart of stone, just get the Devine to watch a telly program showing people being needlessly cruel and brutal to animals.

But despite this exemplary capacity to ignore suffering, or to blame it on the ABC for daring to show it, something went wrong with the top comments on the right of her piece.

It seems somehow a bunch of greenies and do gooders have infested the Sunday Terror, and decided to take on the weirdness known as the Devine ...

Now one of the things the pond is sensitive to is the condescension that's a sure sign of a well-off squeam-less, vicious, savage, animal-hating city dweller, and it came in that Devine line ...

"... male battlers in regional Australia hanging onto their dignity, whose main social interaction is a night at the doggies ..."

Yes, you wouldn't expect a male battler in regional Australia to hang onto their dignity by interacting with the wife or the children, or even the diggers and cobbers down at the pub or the club. 

All they've got is a greyhound ... well, actually, not even that, just a night at the doggies ... that's the only leisure pursuit open to them ... poor hapless, mindless twits that they are ...

And so on and so forth. The one thing you can guarantee is that when the hysteria floodgates are opened, they'll quickly screech up to eleven ... with bonus tear-sodden handkerchiefs ...


There it is again. Most country guys are as poor as a church mouse ...

Well the Devine story features a couple of nice shots of doggies, but naturally there's also a shot of the main villain who casually trashes the down at heel, incapable of socialising, wretchedly poor, useless, loser drop kicks ...


Indeed, indeed. Around this time the pond was moved to urge the return of bear-baiting and cock-fighting. Sure there's a little animal wastage, but let's face it, where's the data, who's got the statistics?

Let's face the truth, the only way that poor country folk could socialise and retain a shred of dignity was to gather and bet on cocks slashing each other with razor-sharp spurs.

For some strange reason, the do gooders and molly coddlers have also managed to get a ban on bull fighting and bull baiting, and yet in Elizabethan times, the only way your average peasant could have a decent life was to gather at a celebration to kill the beast ...

In fact the pond was intrigued to discover on the wiki for blood sports such disregarded activities as boar and badger and fox and hare tossing, goose pulling, and octopus wrestling, not to mention rat-baiting and spider fighting don't have a place in the social life of the lumpenproletariat...

But enough distraction, it's time to finish up the Devine ...


Indeed, indeed. Only twenty per cent, only one in five. What an excellent average ...

Bring back dog carting, the pond says, or if it must be abolished, let the same penalty apply to noisy, vexatious street musicians ...


Now if you want snaps of dog carting, go here, but don't say you weren't warned. What next? Be forced to head off to Queensland just to film a goat race?

Now the pond can sense a few mollycoddlers and do gooders getting restless at this point.

After all, it seems there are 6,809 registered greyhounds in NSW, so the closest mathematically that we can get to the 150,000 dead doggies in the Thames is by counting in the 48-68,000 dogs killed in the past 12 years in NSW because they were too slow or otherwise unsuitable for racing (or so the ABC reported here).

But that's all part of the hyperbolic, hysterical exaggerated, hang a greenie from the nearest lamp-post style of the Devine ...

Sure pedants will point out that the 150k is a general estimate, and that reports of all 150k ending up in the Thames might be a wild exaggeration, but that's the Devine style. 

When you discover that 150k dead greyhounds have choked Sydney harbour, remember that you were first given the word in the Sunday Terror ...

Congratulations Mike Baird, you've been Devined ...



Now keep on tearing up the inner west, and stuffing the rats into high rise apartments. No cruelty to animals or humans there ...

As for Peta, the pond, for completeness and the sake of the record, feels compelled to note her musings for the day. 

In short order, what an effete ponce Malware is, and how little he cares for the suffering of the poor when it comes to slugging their superannuation.


Actually if robot trucks come along, technology might just do that. Thank the long absent lord we've kept copper and HFC to slow the advance!

As for bringing back Tony, forget it. He's got a longer game to play and fish to fry when Malware flames out ...


As opposed to the prism of Sydney's northern beaches... 

Trust the pond, it's a world apart. There are genuine battlers living in Mosman, and the level of poverty in the Division of Warringah and the northern beaches is shocking to see ...

Truly venturing out there is far more dangerous than a trip to Mt Druitt, and the high school so famously mocked by the Daily Terror ...

As for Peta's commendations, naturally it's to unleash the kraken... or if you will, unleash the mutton Dutton, back after his recent near electoral death experience ...


And so on, and so forth, and they say that the Terror doesn't provide rich Sunday reading ... as we plunge on into the new world and terribly exciting times ...






12 comments:

  1. From the depths of my memory comes an old show with Rod Quantock and Evelyn Krape, "Australia- You're Standing In It" and a line from a ocker character- "you've got to be cruel to be nasty".
    Personally as a blue collar male I get a little tired of these silver tail women telling me that I'm a shitty person and should be indulged in that nastiness.

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    Replies
    1. Yair, GH, my father was an itinerant brickie for pretty much the totality of his adult life (apart from some years in the Great Depression when he wasn't anything, and could only afford one haircut per year) and he was a decent guy too. When a bit of prosperity returned late in the 1930s, he used to ride his horse around the tan track at the Bot. Gards. in Melbourne which, of course, is what all the poor working class used to do ("Work to live, not live to work").

      He used to tell me stories about the St Kilda vigilantes, too, when hoi polloi took over basic street policing duties for some number of years. And you can read about some of that here: https://news.google.com/newspapers?nid=1300&dat=19450804&id=qL1VAAAAIBAJ&sjid=L5cDAAAAIBAJ&pg=7240,4928202&hl=en
      and here: http://trove.nla.gov.au/newspaper/article/23439727

      So it goes.

      He more or less voted the same way all his life too:
      1. Communists in the union ("because you know they'll fight for you")
      2. Lib in the State (a lot of it was the time of Henry Bolte)
      3. Lab in the Feds (except, despite being what would now be called a 'Freethinker', he would occasionally vote for the DLP in the Senate. I could never get him to explain that one adequately).

      Salt of the earth, he was. Apart from that DLP thing, anyway.

      Delete
  2. I can just see it now.... Parramatta River choked with the bodies of dead greyhounds.

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    Replies
    1. Well at least it won't be choked by the bodies of dead "too slow" racehorses, because they were all eaten by the greyhounds as dogfood.

      Delete
  3. "The decision is driven by the sensibilities of vegan GetUp activists..."

    Vegans, greenies, those concerned with human rights, those groupings sucked into the GetUp! thing don't actually get much chop in GetUp when it comes to the crunch. Below the surface it's an ALP front, pure and simple. I "got up", and got in close a few months ago for their "non-partisan", progressive, activist, community organisation election campaign. I didn't last through to the end. Their smoothly deceptive manipulations in favour of the ALP, matching ALP campaign developments in lock step, and dropping issues that a majority of 'members' had selected immediately prior to the the MUC/MOC election was too much to stomach. Many union and ALP organisers moved across for the campaign to 'volunteer' as Getup organisers. If I was disposed towards volunteering for the ALP there'd be no coal mine in Australia I didn't love, and just like them I'd approve of Manus, Nauru... too many things. I also found it highly uncomfortable to be contacting voters based on ALP voter database details as supplied to GetUp by the ACTU. Worse was the quid pro quo collecting/updating of contacted voter details in bulk, without disclosure, probably illegally, and destined to be passed back to the ALP. And as clear as their non-transparent financials could be that is where most of GetUp's $12million in revenue raised through numerous donations will go for this FY: a campaign for the ALP. ALP? GetUp? Get fcuked!

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    Replies
    1. The question is, Anony, does the Devine Essence, or indeed any of the reptile media, know that GetUp is an ALP front; and if they do, why don't they say so ?

      Delete
    2. GB, Devine would need to lift the story from somewhere first. That wouldn't yet have been revealed in the Graudian, and as it is damaging to the ALP business of parasitising funds and a volunteer workforce Devine won't be reading it in the Graudian. That leaves it to be lifted elsewhere from the reptile pontificate yammering away in their echo chamber armchairs with koolaid jug to hand. They have tried it on previously, they've thrown some mud, but as they don't get up from their armchairs their efforts in understanding and undermining GetUp! have been pretty pathetic. Their kind of anti-greenie-lefty-decency attack actually works as cover for, and an aid to GetUp recruiting. That the highly-skilled industrious GetUp! commissariat planners having sweated hard on research into communication, pr, and organisation are far more clever, and more far-seeing than ignorant lazy reptiles will have something to do with it.

      Delete
  4. "if robot trucks came along..."

    after this:

    https://robertscribbler.com/2016/06/15/al-gores-revenge-internal-combustion-engines-stink-and-this-ridiculously-powerful-electric-turbine-truck-proves-it/

    ReplyDelete
  5. Just one last little waffle and then I'll shut up ... for today, anyway.

    Now in her piece, The Devine starts off with this:

    "... the authoritarian elitism that the modern Liberal party is making its hallmark ..."

    Which, it kinda struck me, shows that Miranda only has one small set of words to write with. She's using exactly the same words to excoriate the NSW Libs as she uses to excoriate all and any Labs. Aha, I begin to comprehend ...

    Like most people, I have two vocabularies: one is the set of words that I more or less know the meaning of, and the other is the set of words I think I understand enough to actually use, myself. And, of course, the second vocabulary is a proper subset of the first - ie it contains some number fewer words.

    With the Devine, on the other hand, she uses many more words than she understands, and that's even after using the same limited set of words in many different circumstances. For example her (mis)use of 'hallmark' which is something used to indicate the purity of precious metals, yet here she uses it to characterize the dross that the Libs have become.

    Actually, now that I come to think of it, quite a few reptiles are like that - eg Greggy Bromancer. But not the exceedingly wise Prattler, of course ... no, definitely not he.

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    Replies
    1. Words? I heard the bromancer on their Radio Natter this morning demanding he not be verballed on his support for the Iraq war crimes. More word crimes.

      Delete
  6. for someone who rails against "Elites", she sounds awfully condescending!

    ReplyDelete

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