Tuesday, April 12, 2016

Day 22, and a warning that this day the pond goes into the Terror toilet with a deeply deranged mind ...

Profound apologies, before we even begin, but the pond found that juxtaposition captivating and compelling.

Now there are some that say that Mark Latham has no reason to exist, at least as a member of the commentariat, having been exposed in all sorts of disreputable and astonishing and abysmal behaviour, but of course he exists to troll ...

What he needs is a basement where his fetid mushrooms might still grow, and is there any more perfect a bunker than the one infested by the daily Terrorists, as base a group of reptiles as still exist in tree killer land ...

And so the pond felt eerily and strangely compelled, in much the same way as one might judge a decent horror movie by the strength of the psychosis in the villain that sets the plot in motion ... who remembers Vera Miles and John Gavin up against the twitching Tony Perkins?

We've all been there ...

Down in the basement ...

Now this is likely to get ugly, so again apologies, and the pond understands all those already racing towards the exit sign, the popcorn left under the chair, the jaffas un-rolled.

The pond agrees and approves. All that lurks here is brain-deadening, soul-destroying material, even more perplexing than Germaine Greer attempting to understand modern perspectives on gender ...

Let us now go to the shrieks and howls of a male dinosaur, but please, put on that tinfoil hat to avoid the more damaging and distressing effects of the read ...

Hmm, this is going to be tougher than the pond realised, even with all its elaborate preparations.

Self-appointed inner-city elites is of course mere regurgitation, a feather display designed to gain entrance to the hive mind, while the use of sarcasm is naturally preferred to irony and satire and wit, in the way a blunderbluss is preferred to a pistol ...

Then there's the hysteria about the EU, and the displacement of teaching of maths, science and English, all standard saws in the right wing shock jock locker ...

But the pond really can't remember the last time that Karl Marx was put at the top of a column as a fit figure for demonisation. Perhaps in the 1950s, the 1960s? 

No doubt we can now move on to a bit of women-bashing in comfort ...

Perhaps first a cartoon for refreshment?

Naturally the pond must apologise to David Rowe - it's a day for apologies - and you can find more Rowe here, because to juxtapose him with Mark Latham and use him as a relief from the torture in a way sentences the hapless cartoonist to the same Terrorist toilet as the pond.

Hey nonny no, on we go, and is there a "neo" in the house?

There is, it has to be said, something deeply weird about Latham and his notion of normal people and what they watch and the joys of suburban life. It's that reference to Married at First Sight, and the way he's still brooding about Chris Gayle ...

But now we come to the serious bit, where the Terrorists ran out of ideas for photo illustrations ... and so resorted to a standard hagiographical one, so that we might all brood on the vanity of Narcissus ...

Oh yes, there's a deep irony there somewhere, the bit about click baiting, from a master troller, and how clever of the Terrorists to put the snap of Latham the troglodyte deep in the body of the text, rather than confront unwary readers with the fearsome sight at the start of the read, as they usually do with Miranda the Devine and Akker Dakker ...

Perhaps a pause for another refreshing cartoon?

(And more Wilcox here).

Yes, the pond does feel so stupid. Fancy hoping that Mark Latham might someday display integrity, humanity and wisdom, a capacity for something approaching emapthy as opposed to the standard dose of bile and arm-breaking anger erupting from some deep monstrous thing swamp.

And so to a final gobbet, where the master troll must make do without photographs and instead rely on the ancient art of abuse ...

Now there's no point in attempting to argue with a paranoid in full possession of the facts.

All that can be done is laugh loudly, and with a satirical edge, even if that means laughing at a man who is seriously disturbed, what with his blather about a nation of clones, and cultural re-education and the suffocating propaganda of political correctness and dangerously authoritarian processes and nanny-states, and all the other cliches of a mind bereft of any signs of any insights beyond the cliche and the stereotype ...

It is remarkable however how accurately the Terrorists have judged their gutter journalism, how they have got the crowd to join in the chant of "kill the politically correct pig, kill the politically correct pig" (and smash four eye's glasses just for fun).

Oh indeed, indeed, and then we could have had this sort of twitter stream emanating from the Lodge on a daily basis ...

That stream of unconscious stupidity can amazingly still be found online here, but warning, with much more offensive abuse.

It was the last tweet above with the pond. The pond has no idea why any woman would want to have sex with the real or the unreal Mark Latham. The women the pond meets routinely assures the pond they would rather have sex with a vintage wooden Victorian dildo than with the real Mark Latham ...

Of course those absurd tweets were back in the day when Latham got caught out by BuzzFeed in Here's How We Confirmed Mark Latham Has Been Tweeting Abuse At Women, followed by Mark Latham Admits To Misogynistic Twitter Account 63 Days After It Was Exposed.

Yes, it took him a long time to come to the truth, because deep inside, he knows he pretends it's just a harmless form of trolling, but also suspects that it reveals he's a deeply damaged bill of goods ...

As for the pond, we wake each day amazed, pleased and gratified at the way that Australia dodged a bullet.

That infamous handshake was truly revealing, and the thug that lurked behind it now parades for all to see in the toilet known as the Daily Terror ... the final port of call in a remarkable fall from grace.

Well the pond has done more than enough toilet duty for the day ... and must cluck reprovingly at David Pope ... (and more Pope here).

What? No royal commission into News Corp and the way its reptiles gratuitously waste the precious hours, minutes and seconds still left to the pond?


  1. So, DP, what do you make of the Oreo's latest excrescence?

    1. I don't know about DP, but I think the Oreo's creamy interior is some sort of repellent yeast infection no doubt contracted from too much lying down with the IPA.

  2. I see Stephen Fry has got himself into hot water again (he seems to taking on the mantle of Bob Ellis) by it is alleged, saying the rape victims should 'get over it.' Say something deliberately provocative, then watch the fallout. Germaine Greer is a past master at this technique.

    But read his comments in full and it is a lot more complex and subtle than will reported.

  3. The arms industry has always been obsessed with big penis and male domination references in it's naming conventions. The latest predator drones from General Atomics are called the Predator and Reaper.

    Nudge nudge, wink wink.

    1. We also have the We also have the Pterodactyly (AKA Wing Loon), The Warrior, The Avenger, The Sharp Sword and strangely The Migrant, The Harpy, The Divine Eagle and The Fallen Angel (that one's a bit whimsical).

      But my favourite is the BAE Mantis, but this may bit a bit of a cock-up, as mantis are well known for eating the males after copulation.


      Why not just cut to the chase and call one the Big Fucker.

    2. Fat Man and Little Boy ?

  4. Top of the morning DP. As I was reading Latham's rant I was thinking this is a man droning on about the endless droning on we get from said tabloid and thought that to get a gig at the Terror you must obviously be required to leave one's brain at the door when clocking in. A sort of standard clone ritual or such. I was just waiting for that reference to the Frankfurt school,and lo and behold,Latham ends with that last line about leftist clones.Mission accomplished!

    I hereby dub him "Sir Clone of Drone"....You are so right DP, we really dodged a bullet. I remember that studio hand shake well. It was just like the moment when you realize you have just stood on a 2 inch nail,but it is too late. It has already happened. At least he has ended up where he belongs.

    1. Frankfurt School, Political Correct, religion, sexuality, "a strategy exercised through influence in universities" - all swiped straight from the old far right saint Paul Weyrich, founder Free Congress Foundation, also of the Heritage Foundation now owned by the Koch brothers. Does Rupe see that they're all issued a tacky little book of Weyrich's stuff? A wall poster perhaps?

  5. And DP, you have been warned before about not going to the toilet with Alan Jones. You may be in for a Kings size surprise.

    1. Only public ones, Anon.

  6. Sun Tzu: "If you wait by the river long enough, the bodies of your enemies will float by"

    Australia: "If you wait by the Telegraph long enough, tragic figures like Latham and Timmeh will get a space to jabber"

    The state of journalism in the Murdoch stables is rancid enough, and as per above, when Dorothy gets a hold of the Oreo's excretions of yesterday, the floor is going to shake.

    Thankyou lord for all that you provide us for our daily bread.

    1. Thinly sliced, lightly toasted and spread with caviar, VC ?

      Talk about "rancid journalism" in the Murdoch press, it was my very distasteful experience to encounter somebody called Grace Collier in Saturday's Ostrayun (well, you take what you can get and all the café had was that). She is appalling - where did she spring from ?

      But I was trying to recall say 50 or so years ago, whether the so-called 'journalism' was as bad as it is now. The situation then was just about a complete inverse of what it is now: the 'Right' defined PC (mentioning religion in public was really bad, but criticizing, in any way at all, the dominant paradigm, was just about a hanging offence) and the rabid journalism was all on the 'Left'.

      Except that, for the life of me, I simply can't remember any 'Left' journalism that was as rancid as the 'Right' produce now. Maybe I was just living a closeted life, maybe if I'd read the Marxist-Leninist Socialist Monthly (or some such thing) I'd have encountered writers like Latham, Bolt, Acker-Dacker etc.

      But somehow, I just can't believe that. What exactly has happened in the last decade or two that has produced the current situation ?

    2. GB, Grace has had an interesting career starting with the trade union movement (not sure which, possibly ASU). A friend, then a fellow field worker, knew her then and described her as an opportunist mainly interested in her own advancement more than workers' conditions and rights.

      After working her way up a bit, it was no surprise when she set up her own business as an IR consultant. Evidently she made a few good employer contacts in her delegate days, and it was among them that she established business. Her main claim to fame was when called in to mediate a dispute once she spoke to union leaders with a microphone hidden in her bra. The court was not impressed with this method of gathering information aimed at incriminating the union, and her evidence was thrown out.

      Since then, on the strength of her IR experience on "both sides" she got a gig with the AFR as a specialist. Later it was not a big hop to The Australian, which was clearly her spiritual home, albeit she might be in a position to get an IPA gig if she wanted.

      Her other notoriety was to show a passionate hatred of Julia Gillard, which seems to run very deep among female RWNJs. She was a frequent user of Twitter for these attacks, at one point accusing her of showing cleavage in the House, something which later turned out to be a photoshop image. And it was a bit rich coming from her with her hidden bra fame.

      I'm old and can't remember too many similar mad lefties from the old days, especially in MSM. A few might have lurked in specialist journals, albeit I can't remember too many, other than Bob Ellis himself in Nation Review. But you might be pleased to know that Acker Dacker, then a student in the 60s, was once given the nickname of Hanoi Piers, from his activist days.

    3. Thanks for the Grace Collier background, GD. I do read the AFR occasionally (like about once a week in the library and never end-to-end), but this was the first time I've read any of the Ostrayun in yonks. Remarkably (or, just maybe, not so remarkably), few cafes - at least the few that I frequent for my daily coffee, muffin and dead-tree press read - bother with that rag.

      But it does seem she's found her one true spiritual home: a place where she can outshine the Bolts, Dackers (aka Hanoi Piers - love it), Devines and Kennys of this world.

      But no, like you, unless they were writing for a few score party faithful in publications I simply never read, then I just don't think the 'Left' was ever nearly that bad. I tend to remember the likes of Kenneth Davidson as my image of a 'Lefty journo'.

      Of course, there were those who coined such glorious phrases as "running dog lackeys of the USA", but they all spoke Mandarin (or maybe Puthonghua) which I can't read.

      And that reminds me of the one thing about Ronnie Raygun I ever found amusing. It (might have) occurred over the course of some negotiations regarding get-togethers and/or visits which initially involved Brezhnev and then his successor Andropov. The "conversation" supposedly went something like this:

      Brezhnev to Raygun: "I had a dream last night. I dreamt we sorted out our issues and I came to America and was taken to the White House. And on the front 0f the White House was a big banner with writing in Russian."

      Raygun to Brezhnev: "and what did the banner say ?"

      Brezhnev to Raygun: "It said, "Workers of the world unite - you have nothing to lose but your chains.""

      Raygun to Brezhnev: "That's funny, because I had a dream last night too. I dreamt that we sorted out our issues and I made a visit to Russia and was taken to the Kremlin. And there, right on the front of the Kremlin was a big banner with large red writing !"

      Brezhnev to Raygun: "And what did the banner say ?"

      Raygun to Brezhnev: "I don't know, I can't read Chinese."

      Ho ho.

    4. Thanks for that reminder about Ken Davidson, a staunch leftist warrior. That's the trouble with my relying on my memory. He was true-blue, albeit I'd put him more in the Galbraith-Keynes view than hard left. But he was uncompromising on waste from whatever direction and he let the Bracks-Brumby government have it blowing so much money on a solar seawater conversion project when a lot cheaper options were around. He managed to upset Keating at one point and was never comnfortable with the 'Deregulation' age and privatisation. I'm starting to think he was right.

      Stories abounded on Ronnie Reagan. You've got to admire the banks/brokers and the media owners of the time the way they manage to portray him as one of the great Presidents when in truth he was a clueless as GW Bush but had the sense to just be ceremonial. He was a good actor and could get his lines perfect.

      Maggie Thatcher came across for his funeral and was heard to remark, "Poor old Ronnie. Never did have much between the ears!"

    5. Oh yeah, Ken D was a vigorous opponent of the desalination plant, but as I remember it all of his preferred alternatives depended on continuing levels of fairly regular rainfall. Which, of course, can no longer be depended on.

      Ken D has been around for a very long time (and still is occasionally), but I can't remember if he was there for the Bolte era. Then again, I barely remember anything of the Bolte era myself though I was around for all of it - albeit a bit young in his early years as Premier, and I didn't read The Age back then.

      However, you did remind me of the only other thing involving Raygun that I found amusing: a poster ('photoshopped' of course) of Maggie looking longingly into Ronnie's eyes with the caption:
      "She promised to follow him to the end of the Earth, he promised to take her there."

  7. Wow, Mark Latham just fits right in at the Tele. He should have fucked off there years ago rather than wasting everyones time


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