Wednesday, January 06, 2016

Don't blush baby, of course there are walri south of Finland ...

There's an obvious choice to day for the pond ... as the reptiles join their master in howling at the moon ...


Oops, an unfortunate juxtaposition ... but isn't there something creepy about both those images?

Others might get distracted by Obama trying to do something about guns in America, but it's hard to see why. Americans love killing each other, with Republicans implementing the Daesh strategic mission on the domestic front, and where's the harm in that? Another day, another gun, another shooting, one less (or many more less) Yankee imperialists in the world, and it's all thanks to the IRA, the best Islamic fundamentalist agent at work in the world today ... with a kill rate that makes Daesh look like rank amateurs ...

Never mind, because the pond doesn't like to run with the pack. The pond much prefers to be an outlier, and besides, as the business plan of the reptiles is to regurgitate federal government press releases, and the thoughts of the recently past premier, the pond was strangely attracted to the deep thinking of the walri man, Mr Wiki himself ...


Yes, there's no need to Greg Hunt Greg Hunt by Hunting for Greg on his wiki, the reptiles have done him proud by publishing his press release in full ...


Naturally, it sent the pond drifting back in time to the golden era of Greg Huntisms ... please, in honour of Chris Gayle, can we avoid references to female anatomy? 


Whoopie doo, 25 mill and a suggestion of crowd funding - ah, was that form of finance the flavour of the month in 2014 or what? - and that famous relocation of walri by fiat, like some Antarctic Stalin forcing the migration of kulaks ...

It led to much mirth and good humoured joking at the time ...


Of course Carlton was wrong, there are oodles of walri south of Finland ... in zoos ... just as you can find the odd pay-cut demanding goose, otherwise known as the rough Brough, in federal parliament, righteously demanding a pay cut ...

And then there's the question of whether Hunt was a fuckwit, or a mere lickspittle lackey, ready to carry out in an unctuous, Heepish way, the wishes of his then master ...

The sceptical might judge him a slavering fuckwit, a lesser poodle, with Pyne-ish tendencies, not least because he thinks that blaming it all on Labor might lead him to think that anyone with a keyboard and google might not be able to wander back to the days when the walri did the bidding of his demonic union-bashing master ...


And so on and so forth, with the rest of that partially expired report at the ABC here.

In truth, both major parties neglected the Antarctic and the Abbott government more so because its fearless leader didn't give a toss about climate science, or even the walri that frolic in that frozen wasteland, but wait, the pond has almost forgotten the rest of the most recent press release, and the astonishing, wondrous announcement of new funding, as opposed to the regurgitation and recycling of old reports and press releases ...


Strange, no news of new funding, but rather just guff recycled from 2014, without, it has to be said, any mention of important initiatives to study the walri of the south ...

But oh how the old master, the 'climate science is crap' man must writhe at that cruel jibe about learning from the past ... perhaps the reptiles should have allowed their new correspondent to give the walri man's press release a once over by an expert...

During the past 100 years we've learned an enormous amount from Antarctica, the benefits of crowd funding, the presence of walri, but there is so much more we can discover. Climate change remains a key focus of research, as it did under my prime ministership, when we managed to avoid almost entirely any discussion of it...
Finding the oldest ice will help us learn about our distant past climate, because climate and weather is always changing, and where's the harm in that, and probing deep beneath the ice can tell us how we had a warming ocean way back when, and where's the harm in that, because it's dinkum Oz coal for the world, yes, it's coal, coal, coal, and naturally I - and my minister - approve Adani's Carmichael coal mine and all who sail with her into the reef, and if there's a changing ice cap, why it just means the walri won't need a winter coat ...

Or some such thing. It was all a walri tease of course, because the new funding announcement for the AAD is surely to be found in the last gobbet of gabble ...


Ah well, never mind, just more blather of the inimitable walri-hunting wiki man kind.

How sweet and considerate of the reptiles to give it an airing.

Back in the day, this wouldn't have been considered soft news, or an opinion piece, but more a whoopee cushion column, with a copious effusion of air ... but it seems that's the business plan for the reptiles ... become a privatised government news agency, and perhaps in due course, take over the ABC.

Never mind, right at the moment, cricket is all the go in rain sodden Sydney, as the flannelled fools flail about in their folly ...

Then ye returned to your trinkets; then ye contented your souls 
With the flannelled fools at the wicket or the muddied oafs at the goals. 
Given to strong delusion, wholly believing a Hunt ... (and the proper Kipling here).

... and so with a gayle of comedy in the air, it is only right and proper that the pond should once again acknowledge the genius of jolly Papery, and more Popish knavery here, and the raging Rowe, more Rowe here, as political walri keep falling from the sodden sky ...





8 comments:

  1. What is it with the seps and guns? It seems that blowing away a a few kids before breakfast is their national sport. Don't get me wrong, I've had a few American friends and their hamburgers and hash browns are passable as food (almost), and some even speak English, but I wouldn't want my daughter to marry one.

    The Americans don't want peace, they are jealous of our freedoms, and won't rest until they've raped all our women, shot our brains out and subjected us all to their TPP law.

    I say nuke New York and Washington, bomb their Macdonalds to oblivion and force all of them to have an A tatooed on their foreheads. A for arsehole.

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  2. What about the old leadership until the new icebreaker comes online in the 20Twenty season, We?

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  3. Speaking of rain, there's Floods!! Can Barnaby get out today to talk up the case for more dams?

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  4. While we allow this to continue, we are all guilty of rape, murder and sexual abuse.

    http://www.theguardian.com/world/2016/jan/06/six-year-old-refugee-allegedly-sexually-assaulted-on-nauru

    Fucking hell - enough is enough.

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  5. Dear Dorothy, some loon fanciers are wont to take it just that bit further, as demonstrated here:

    http://www.math.stonybrook.edu/~tony/birds/loons.html

    The "alarm call" of the loon has got to be a pretty good approximation of a typical Cater ejaculation, wouldn't you reckon? Neither can I imagine a better aural evocation of a Henderson sigh than a "loon wail". The concept of a "loon jamboree" is new to me, I am ashamed to say, but seems to have a great deal of merit. I feel obliged to bring to the attention of all that "looking" may be illegal, depending on the jurisdiction of the loon-fancier, so one would be well-advised to consult with the local authorities before letting one rip.

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    Replies
    1. Lawnote: CAUTION! Looning may be illegal where you live, if it interferes with their courting, nesting or the care of their young. Ask your local Loon Ranger.

      Indeed, indeed.

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    2. "Looking" may well be illegal too, but, before poor eyesight combined with spel chek, I did obviously mean "looning". Sorry about that, as Max would say. Btw, as many others have already mentioned, great to have you back in the saddle, DP.

      Delete

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